Rooster (8 page)

“Yes, they did,” said Mrs. Yuler.

“So the majority would have won anyway,” said Mrs. Nixon, turning to Rooster. “With Percival's vote or without it. Majority rules, remember? Congratulations.”

“Mrs. Yuler said if we didn't take Rooster, we wouldn't get nobody,” said Dorothy-Jane-Anne. “That's why we all voted yes.”

Rooster had been about to shake Mrs. Nixon's outstretched hand. But he didn't. He let his own hand fall by his side and looked at Dorothy-Jane-Anne for a moment. For some reason, he was not completely surprised that such an odd meeting would end this way. And on the upside, at least he knew where he stood.

“That is true. I did say that,” said Mrs. Yuler.

“Goddamn hill,” said Roseann, to herself but out loud. “Heh, heh.”

The meeting ended shortly after that.

6

I
mmediately after the meeting with the Strikers, Rooster went to Puffs' house. “I need a whiskey,” he said, lighting another cigarette. “No mix. No ice. No glass. Just put the bottle on the table and go back to what you were doing.”

Puffs was currently living with his mom in a spacious house near the lake in north Winston, about three blocks from Common House. Mrs. Davis was out most nights. If she was not meeting with clients, caterers, hall managers, entertainers or other people related to her work, she was attending one of the many weddings, anniversary celebrations, or fundraisers that she organized.

When she was home, she threw lavish parties with guests ranging from neighbors and relatives to local and national politicians for whom she worked. This meant, among other things, that there was always a steady and broad supply of liquor in the house. Rooster, Jayson and Puffs frequently took advantage of it.

“Trouble in Cobbville?” said Puffs. He'd just finished his social studies homework and was ready for a break. He'd also written up two more invoices for computer jobs he'd recently completed, meaning more money would soon be coming his way. In other words, his spirits were as high as Rooster's were low.

Rooster slumped into a kitchen chair and let his head fall back. For a moment he said nothing. Then he turned to Puffs and repeated his request. “Whiskey?” he said.

“Thursday?” said Puffs. “I thought we were gonna lay off the weeknight assaults on my mom's supply until school was out.”

“I don't remember anything about that.”

Puffs hesitated. “Maybe that was something Jayson and I talked about.”

“It certainly wasn't with me. And with the kind of day I'm having, it wouldn't matter anyway.”

Puffs pulled out a chair and sat down. “Why? What happened?”

Rooster had not intended to spill the contents of his day until he had a drink in his hand, but he did anyway, beginning with his meeting in the morning with Mrs. Nixon. When he finished, Puffs sat and stared at him in silence.

“Bowling?” he finally said. It was all he could come up with for an initial comment.

Rooster nodded glumly.

“You're taking four people from Common House to the Winston Bowling alley?”

Rooster continued to nod.

“For the next six weeks?”

“Until school's out.”

“And none of them like you?”

“One does. A really spunky little guy who wants to be a rock star.”

“What are the women like?”

“They're weird. One of them sticks her whole hand in her mouth and sucks on her fingers.”

“What's so weird about that?”

“Then she cleans her glasses with them. It's like, ‘Could you be more disgusting if you tried?'”

“What about the other one?”

“The other one did not take her eyes off me the whole time I was there. I sat in that chair for an hour and she did not take her eyes off me once.”

“Wouldn't that mean she likes you?”

“No. She's just weird. She's like the other one, except she doesn't suck on her fingers. She asks me questions all the time. One after another after another after another. ‘Do you like being called a moron? How come you didn't say nothing after he called you a moron? Are you a moron?' And she was staring at me the whole time. I'm gonna have nightmares of her staring at me.”

“One of them called you a moron, I take it?”

“Percival, this guy who's about fourteen feet tall. He talks like he's being strangled, which gives me a good idea, now that I think about it. Halfway through the interview he slams his hand down on the table, calls me a moron and screams at the woman running the place to throw me out.”

“What did she say?”

“She says to him, ‘No name-calling, Percival. It's against the rules.' Like there's rules in that place. Right. Rule number one. Don't stick both hands in your mouth at one time. Suck all the fingers on your one hand, then switch. Rule number two. Don't call people morons. Number three. Repeat yourself as often as you can. You should hear this Tim guy talk. ‘Okay, okay, okay. I'll ask the first question. I'll ask it. I'll ask. I'm ready. Oh boy. Rock 'n' roll. I'm ready. I'm ready.'”

Puffs got up from his chair and walked toward the telephone on the wall next to the refrigerator.

“What are you doing?” said Rooster.

“I'm getting Jayson over here. Then I'm gonna get you a drink. You've earned one tonight.”

Jayson showed up at the door half an hour later. By that time, Rooster had phoned his mom and told her that he was getting help in math and social studies from Puffs and would likely be sleeping over. She was skeptical, but he eventually convinced her that he was telling the truth. She asked him how the meeting at Common House went, and he told her, for simplicity's sake, that he had decided to take the position after all, but that everything was still fine.

When Jayson arrived, Puffs, who was still in the mood for fun regardless of Rooster's situation, told him that Rooster was despondent because Jolene had just dropped him for another guy.

“They're still friends, though,” Puffs added. “Don't say anything bad about her. You'll get him upset.”

“They really broke up?” Jayson said, taking the bait immediately. He was vulnerable to such stories: He had been dumped by three different girls in grade eleven, prompting him to make a pledge with himself to remain single for the rest of his high school days.

“Go see for yourself,” said Puffs. “He's in the kitchen. He's on his third drink already and I just got the bottle out.”

Jayson went into the kitchen and slapped a big thick hand on the back of Rooster's shoulders. “Buddy,” he said, “Puffs just told me about your day. The Jay-man feels your pain.”

Rooster nodded in silence and took another sip of his drink, which was actually his first.

“You wanna talk about it?” Jayson sat down in the chair vacated by Puffs.

Rooster shook his head. “It's too weird. I've been through it enough already tonight. I just wanna forget about it.”

Jayson nodded understandingly. “Not a problem. This guy won't say another word.”

“Puffs told you everything anyway, right? Who did what and all that?”

“He did.” Jayson continued to nod his big bald head. “He gave the Jay-dog the goods. Pretty incredible.”

“Well, I had it coming, apparently.”

“That's what she said?”

“We had a meeting this morning. She laid it all out for me.”

Jayson frowned. “She called a meeting?”

“We sat and talked. She told me all the reasons she was doing it, and I just sat there thinking, ‘Is this happening? Am I really here right now?'”

“What reasons did she give you?”

Rooster shrugged. “I goof around too much. I'm not serious about anything. My marks.”

“Your marks?”

“Stupid, eh? You'd think she'd be used to it by now. Every year around this time I'm failing, and every year at the end of June I pass.”

“Did she say anything about … the other party?” Jayson asked this tentatively, not wanting to rock the boat too much.

“Of course,” said Rooster with a shrug.

“She did?”

“That's what this is all about.” Rooster held up his glass and took another sip.

“Do you mind if I ask who it is?”

Rooster shook his head. “I just finished telling Puffs. I'm done for the night.”

Jayson sat back in his chair and shook his head. Puffs joined them at the table with a drink. He passed Jayson a can of Coke and listened in.

“You've heard all this already?” Jayson said to Puffs.

Puffs nodded solemnly.

“This is wild, man. Jayson's never heard anything like this before.” He turned back to Rooster. “Where did she get the idea to do it like this?”

“Mrs. Helmsley,” said Rooster. The whiskey was starting to make him feel better. “Old Big Bird from Hell had a hand in it.”

Jayson was stunned. “Mrs. Helmsley?”

“Uh-huh. They came up with a plan together. They had a plan. I had a plan. Everyone had a plan. But good ole Irving set me straight. He said, ‘Rooster, for your sake, I hope your plan works. But if it doesn't, you won't be the first person in this kitchen to fail.' How's that for a confidence booster? Being compared to him.”

“You told Irving about all this?” said Jayson.

“He knew anyway. She called my mom.”

“She told your mom?”

Rooster nodded.

“What'd your mom say?”

“She went crazy, as expected. Told me I got what was coming to me.”

“Your mom said you had this coming to you?”

“Uh-huh.”

“Wow.” Jayson sat back in his chair. “I never thought Jolene was up to anything like this.”

“Jolene?” said Rooster, with a frown. Given the events of the day, he had not had a chance to talk with her yet. She knew nothing about Mrs. Nixon's plan or his involvement with the Strikers. “What does she know about any of this?”

Jayson thought for a moment. “Good point.”

“She's never done anything like this before in her life.”

“That explains a lot, actually.”

“I bet her old man'll be proud of me, though, for seeing something like this through,” Rooster added. Jayson frowned when he heard this. Puffs quickly covered his mouth with his hand and pretended to cough. “I can just hear him saying, ‘Rooster, a young man's path to adulthood is often as unique as the young man himself. Just keep your balls out of the gutter and you'll do just fine.'”

Puffs' eyes started to water.

Jayson's jaw dropped. He took another drink of his Coke, then reached for the whiskey bottle and poured a healthy amount into the can and swished it around. “That is one interesting family you hooked up with.”

“Is it ever.”

“Keep your balls out of the gutter. That's the damndest bit of advice the Jaymeister's ever heard.”

“I can hear him saying it now. Or ‘Remember, don't cross the line or your balls won't count.'”

Jayson took a big swig from his Coke can and shook his head. “What's with this guy and balls?”

“That's just the way he is,” said Rooster. “That's how he'll respond to this. But he'll be proud of me. I know that for sure.”

“He sounds sick.”

“I don't know about that,” said Rooster, draining his drink. “But he sure isn't funny.”

The next morning, at around nine thirty, Rooster was called to Mrs. Helmsley's office. He had arrived at school late. His head ached like he'd been kicked by a horse, and his stomach was rolling like a nasty day at sea. He was desperate for peace and quiet but knew he was not going to find it anytime soon.

“Well, well,” Mrs. Helmsley said as he walked in.

“Morning,” he said, shielding his eyes. Behind her was an entire wall of wide-open windows, through which the glorious morning sun was shining brightly.

“What's the matter with you?”

“I have a headache.”

“From what?”

“I stayed up late planning a pizza party for my new friends.”

“Very funny. Have a seat. I got all the goods from Pam Yuler last night. She was not impressed with your behavior at the interview. She said you swore. You were late. You asked for at least two cigarette breaks.”

“I got the job, didn't I? Isn't that what I went there for?”

“You got the job because those people are driving everyone else at Common House crazy.”

“No way.”

“But Mrs. Yuler's not very confident in your ability to do anything good with them. The word she used to describe you was ‘underwhelming.' Do you know what that means?”

“Is that even a word?”

“It's the opposite of overwhelming. It means that rather than leaving her in awe of your abilities, you left her wondering what she'd just gotten herself into, and whether or not it's going to lead to a bigger mess than the one she's already anticipating.”