Saying Goodbye (What the World Doesn't Know) (21 page)

            Sarah was already a fan of all the new bands of the day
—
the Beatles, the Animals, the Rolling Stones—but to her they all sounded and even looked similar. So when she was told she would be hosting the Dark Knights, she had no real knowledge of any of the lads in the band; she was just excited for the chance to meet them and perhaps get noticed.

            Upon meeting the Dark Knights it was rather a disappointment as they all acted aloof and uninterested. For them, it was just another gig to perform and she was just another girl. Her excitement immediately turned to disappointment when no one in the band appeared to find her that engaging. In fact they seemed more interested in conversing with each other instead of meeting her.

            It was Alex, however, who had caught her eye. Each guy in the band was cute in his own way, but Alex had a rugged look to him. She had once read that his father was an Irish boxer, which intrigued her. When he noticed her looking at him, he gave her a big smile that gave Sarah the shivers.

            As the show was just about to begin, Sarah positioned herself between the band members, but made sure to stand close to Alex. When the camera turned toward her and she received the single to start, Sarah raised her microphone to her lips. “Good evening England, I am Sarah Moore, your host tonight for Stage Door Five. On tonight’s show we have the Dark Knights, who initially got their start in Manchester. So to start the show, here is the Dark Knights with their latest hit, “Lonely Girl.”

            Sarah stepped off stage as the Dark Knights prepared to start. Waiting for his musical cue, Peter positioned his microphone and then sang with a sweet voice:

 

 

            After the song, Sarah interviewed the band with the standard questions: “Where do you get your inspiration? Where did you learn to play? How did you meet each other?” When it came time to interview Alex, the questions changed to a more personal nature. “Do you have a girlfriend?”

            Alex was stunned by the abrupt change in questioning. He laughed and repeated, “Do I have a girlfriend?”

            “Yes,” Sarah pressed. “Is there someone special?”

            He looked at her and then looked at the other guys in the band. He was prepared to respond with one of his canned answers, like: “I got my first guitar when I was twelve,” but that didn’t pertain to the question. “Me mum,” he finally said with a laugh.

            Sarah giggled. “Well, everyone’s mum is special. I’m referring to a romantic love
—
a
girlfriend
.” She then pressed the microphone toward Alex’s lips. “What I mean is, are you available?”

            Alex chuckled nervously and looked at the other guys, who were winking at him. “Am I available for
what
exactly?” He looked at the camera with a wise smile. “I mean, I don’t think the BBC wants me to tell their viewing audience what I’m available for . . .”

            Sarah playfully punched him on the shoulder. “Okay, wise guy. If you’re going to be coy with the questions, we’ll just let the fans make up their own minds about you.”

            Alex made direct eye contact with Sarah, which set her off balance, and said seductively, “I’m single. Are you happy now?”

            Sarah winked and said, “Yes, quite happy.” She then walked over to Josh and asked him when he got his first drum kit.

            When the show ended Nick approached Alex, who was packing up his guitar, and kicked him in the shin.

            “Ouch!” said Alex. “You arse! What was that for?”

            Nick laughed. “Are you interested in getting laid tonight or not?”

            “What?” Alex muttered.

            “That posh bird was all over you,” he said, nodding toward Sarah. She was feigning interest as she carried on a conversation with another cast member but all the while kept glancing in Alex’s direction. “You could’ve had her in the middle of the show, on national television. I’m telling you, she was fucking all over you.”

            Alex looked over at her. Sarah met his gaze and smiled. “Yeah, well . . . she’s pretty enough,” he said.

            “Yeah, man, she’s real choice,” said Nick encouragingly. “So then what’s your problem, mate? She’s hot for you!”

            “I don’t need your help, yeh know,” said Alex, lifting his guitar case in his hand.

            Nick leaned in toward Alex. “I don’t know. You’re here; she’s over there.”

            “And you’re here in my fucking face, so sod off,” scolded Alex.

            But when the crowds began to diminish and only stagehands remained, it was Sarah who made her way toward Alex.

            “You were very good tonight,” she said.

            “Thanks,” he chuckled. “You were too.”

            “It was my first night,” said Sarah. “I was so nervous.”

            Alex gave her a wry grin as he watched the crowd leave through the backstage door. “Could have fooled me; you came across like a pro.”

            “Thank you.”

             They slowly walked alongside one another, Sarah being careful to match her footsteps with Alex’s. She placed her hands neatly on her dress and glanced sideways at him. She could feel the energy that surrounded him, and she was so intensely captivated, but her mission of perfection did not allow her to break any rules of decorum. Just standing beside him, though, she understood why so many girls threw themselves at him; however, she knew it simply wouldn’t be prudent for her to do the same.

            “Maybe we could get together sometime?” Alex asked finally.

            “That would be nice,” responded Sarah. “I would like that.”

            “Would you like to go for a drink right now?”

            Sarah had to work at the restaurant early the next morning and her mother would surely be expecting her home at any moment, but this was an opportunity she couldn’t walk away from. “Okay,” she said. “Sure.”

            It was late in the evening when they arrived at a local upscale restaurant; most of the patrons had already left. Once Alex and Sarah found a quiet table for drinks, Alex ordered a glass of red wine for Sarah and a whiskey for himself. As he sat staring at her from across the table, he decided that she definitely was the prettiest girl he had ever seen
—
large brown eyes, strawberry-blonde hair, and delicate lips. She was incredibly clean and well-groomed as well
—
her complexion glowed, her teeth were pearly white, and she smelled like lavender. She was a little skinny and tall for his taste, but he told himself that no girl was perfect. True, he had always fancied bustier, full-figured girls, but Sarah would do.

            They chatted about music and movies and especially her desire to travel. She was very interested in the places he’d visited.

            As they watched each other intently, Alex took special notice of her delicate mannerisms in the way she held her wine glass, dug her spoon into a bowl of custard, and especially how she held a cigarette. It was like looking at a woman in a magazine. Alex’s gestures couldn’t be more opposite. He would slam down his glass after taking a shot and take short, rabid puffs on his cigarette. He performed everything with a sense of impatience and a bit of aggression. It was this combination of stark, contrasting behaviors, however, that ignited their initial attraction.

            Afterward Alex drove Sarah around London. Neither of them cared much for the scenery; they’d seen it all before. But it ended up being an enjoyable evening and neither wanted to leave the other’s company. Finally Alex pulled up outside Sarah’s apartment and leaned forward for a kiss. He was actually surprised to sense a few sparks by the way she responded.

            “Can I come upstairs?” he whispered.

            Sarah pushed him away, stunned that he would be so abrupt. She then remembered that he was a musician and was used to women giving in to sex, but she decided she didn’t want to be one of the girls who gave it up so easily. “I live with my mother. I don’t think it’s a good idea.”

            Alex sat back. “Okay, no problem. Maybe we can do this again sometime?”

            The word ‘maybe’ immediately haunted her. She knew that it was as good as a ‘no’ and would most likely never hear from him again. She was making progress and didn’t want things to end here. “Perhaps we can hang out here in the car for a bit?” she said, relenting to his seduction.

            Sarah had no intentions of having sex with Alex that evening, especially in the front seat of his car
;
but it was exactly what happened. She was wise to all the tales about boys not respecting girls who gave in so quickly, and knew that she was now guilty of falling into that trap. Afterward she reluctantly climbed out of the car and waited on the sidewalk until his car was out of sight.

            It was hard for her to climb the stairs of her mother’s apartment building. Once inside, she collapsed on a chair and simply sighed. Suddenly she felt the gnawing feeling of regret. She should have walked away with his ‘maybe.’ Now she had to wait for him to call.

            Alex of course did call; Sarah was beautiful and he had gotten what he wanted from her
—
sex. Their dates were few and far between due to his touring scheduling. When they did go out, it was always late at night to avoid the crowds. Normally she ended up staying over at his place, allowing them to spend more time together.

            Early one morning, following one of their dates, Alex got up to pee and noticed Sarah’s toiletries in his medicine cabinet. Her toothbrush was in his holder next to his and her hairbrush and make-up bag were lying on the sink. Sarah was slowly in the process of moving in and he didn’t even know it.

            When Alex climbed back into bed, Sarah rolled over and put her arm over his chest. “I see you moved in,” he said.

            Sarah lifted her head and looked at him, searching for his reaction. “Just a few things since I spend the night so often.” She kissed his chest. “I hope it’s okay, unless you’d rather I share your toothbrush.”

            “No,” Alex said with a sigh.

And so it went. One day he was single; the next, a live-in girlfriend had appeared without any apparent effort on his part. It wasn’t such a bad thing, having a pretty girlfriend in his home (and in his bed). He had no complaints, so he let it be.

            After dating for a few weeks, Alex took Sarah to Manchester to meet Leon and Nadine. Sarah of course portrayed the perfect girlfriend and dressed for the part
—
a pretty, modest dress and a bow in her long hair.

            At dinner Sarah delved into a piece of shepherd’s pie as if she were seated at the Queen’s table. When she tasted it she moaned with delight. “Mrs. Rowley, this is the best shepherd’s pie I’ve ever tasted. How do you do it?”

            Nadine glanced at Alex, wondering what her son had done to this girl. “I add a touch more Worcestershire sauce than the recipe calls for to increase the flavor.”

            “It’s wonderful,” said Sarah.

            “Thank you,” replied Nadine bashfully and then the table grew silent.

            Sarah turned her attention to Leon. “You must be so proud of Alex. He’s so talented.”

            “You know,” Leon began, “when he was a lad he used to spin around with a tin pail on his head. Sometimes he’d ram his head into the stone wall. I thought he was retarded up until he was about eleven when he tested high on his school exams. Then I was relieved because he was one of idiot-genius types.”

            Sarah stared at Leon at a loss for words..

            “Pop?!” exclaimed Alex.

            “Maybe you can show your girlfriend where you hung out whenever you were skipping school,” continued Leon.

            Alex threw his father a dirty look. Leon simply gave a twisted grin.

            “Well, he turned out real fine,” complimented Sarah.

            Nadine rose from the table and started collecting plates. “Yeh, that’s what scares me.”

            Sarah had no idea what Nadine meant by the comment, but she stood from her seat to help Nadine with the dishes. Leon got up from the table and grabbed two lagers from the refrigerator. He patted Alex on the shoulder and asked him to step outside.

            Alex and his father stepped outside into the small backyard. “What the hell was that about, Pop?!”

            Leon handed Alex a lager and said, “I think the situation called for a bit of reality.”

            “Well, sure! Why don’t you tell her everything that’s fucked up in my life,” argued Alex.

            Leon ignored his son’s comment and took a swig of his lager. “So tell me about this girl. Do you love her?”

            Alex chuckled. “It’s only been a couple of weeks.”

            “She seems to fancy you something awful,” remarked Leon.