SECRET Revealed (34 page)

1. There is a common theme for our main characters in the S.E.C.R.E.T trilogy. Prior to their transformations, Solange, Dauphine and Cassie have each lost touch with their sexual sides. Can you identify how each loss registered differently for each woman and how each woman recovered that aspect of herself?

2. In
S.E.C.R.E.T. Revealed
, we meet Solange Faraday, the beautiful, successful New Orleans news anchor. Her first fantasy involves a mysterious, attractive handyman. Despite her attraction, Solange stops herself from flirting with him because of her status as an older, professional, divorced mother. Why do you think she feels these attributes hold her back sexually? Have you ever talked yourself out of flirting or behaving sexually because of similar perceptions?

3. In the prologue of
S.E.C.R.E.T. Revealed
, we find Cassie and Will still madly in love before that fateful night at Latrobe’s. Cassie laments that in one week she went from being a “sex goddess” to a “dirty slut.” The notion of a “slut,” what that is and isn’t, is a common theme throughout the S.E.C.R.E.T. trilogy. How do the various characters in S.E.C.R.E.T. respond to the use of that word? How do you feel about that word?

4. That word “slut” also plagues a teenaged character, Claire, who is taunted by friends with dire results. Why do you think this issue still lingers? What can be done to cope with or prevent this kind of bullying?

5. Cassie is struck by the positive changes she sees in herself as the result of her participation in S.E.C.R.E.T. She feels she can now stand up for herself and go after what she wants. She is bolder and surer of herself and is no longer clingy and afraid. In what scenes in
S.E.C.R.E.T. Revealed
can you really see these changes in Cassie?

6. At one point, Solange frets: “What if I’m bad at sex?” Prior to accepting a Step, Solange has that private battle in her mind with her fears. What is at the core of those fears? Can you relate?

7. We learn that a contributing factor to Solange’s divorce was the “falling away of sex” after her son was
born. But what else contributed to the death of their sex life? What changes between her and Julius, her ex, by the end of the book?

8. When recruiting Solange, Matilda, in her usual direct manner, explains that S.E.C.R.E.T. provides the opportunity for sex “relations,” not relationships. “These relations I speak of are purely sexual. Fun, free, safe, anonymous encounters. Ones you’re entirely in control of. Ones
you
define. They don’t define you. Sexual scenarios you come up with, executed exactly the way you want them to be executed. How does that sound to you?” Well, how does that sound to you? Do you feel in control of your sexual experiences? What would it take for you to feel more empowered sexually?

9. Solange meets the Committee of S.E.C.R.E.T. and is quite impressed. “These women were of an age; not pretty young things, not girls but women, women who looked me square-on, who glowed with a kind of sexy self-assurance I had long abandoned for professional polish. They wore their femaleness fearlessly, comfortably, alluringly.” Besides physical appearance, what qualities make a woman sexy? What does it look like to wear your “femaleness fearlessly”? How might an older woman’s sexiness differ from a younger woman’s sexiness? What do you think are Solange’s sexiest traits?

10. The first sexual fantasy on Solange’s wish list has a domestic twist to it and resembles a stereotypical male sexual fantasy, where the man comes home from work to find a sexy woman cleaning or cooking for him. What does this fantasy say about Solange? Out of Solange’s sexual fantasies, which one would appeal to you the most?

11. Cassie says, “Since S.E.C.R.E.T., I had discovered that I had been wrong about a lot of things.” Can you give an example of something she was wrong about that improved her life?

12. Matilda says that some men (and women) don’t think that a woman’s sexual appetite is as important to satisfy as a man’s, or they feel that a woman’s sex life shouldn’t be as varied, complex and interesting as a man’s. Have you ever faced these perceptions in yourself or others? How does this perceived attitude affect Solange? Cassie? What do they do to defy it?

13. When in pain, Matilda says, the best remedy is to “work hard. Try to be of some service. You can’t do anything about how he feels or about how he sees the world. But you can change how you look at yourself. Don’t let this stall all of your great progress.” What are some actions Cassie takes to follow these suggestions? Can you think of situations where Cassie and Dauphine
let their men stall their progress in life? Would you ever apply Matilda’s advice in your own life?

14. For Solange, the anticipation of her next sexual fantasy is heightened by the fact that she doesn’t have to “work for it.” She enjoys the freedom of not having to worry about rejection, primping, flirting, dating, jeopardizing her reputation, and introducing anyone to her son. Do you find the idea of having all that work taken out of your sex life appealing? Why? Why not?

15. “Beauty in business distracts. The more beautiful you are, the less, it seems, you’re taken seriously.” Throughout the book, Solange struggles with her need to be taken seriously as a professional woman and therefore plays down her sexuality, creating obstacles when it comes to S.E.C.R.E.T. Do you think she is right about women, beauty and business? Have you ever had experiences that either prove or deny this theory? How does Solange resolve this, if at all?

16. During her photo-shoot fantasy, Solange becomes more confident with each passing moment. She wonders: “What is it about a stranger that makes you abandon all your rules and regulations?” Why does the lack of emotional intimacy seem to allow Solange (and Cassie and Dauphine, for that matter) to abandon herself to the moment? Have you had
any experiences with strangers where you had a similar reaction?

17. At the opening of Cassie’s, Will agrees to invite Tracina, Carruthers Johnstone and baby Neko. Cassie, now a friend of Tracina’s, insists that Will forgive her. Did this surprise you? Do you think Cassie was right? How is forgiveness important for Will’s transformation in
S.E.C.R.E.T. Revealed
? How good are you at forgiving people?

18. By the end of the book, Cassie and Solange end up in love with men from their real lives, not men from their sex fantasies. In your opinion, what keeps Cassie and Jesse apart? Is it harder or easier for a relationship that begins with sexual chemistry to transform into something more intimate? What makes it possible for Cassie and Jesse to walk away as friends? What sustained Cassie and Will’s relationship, even when they weren’t sexually involved?

19. Tracina was born with a natural comfort and confidence in her sexuality. “Be mysterious,” she tells Cassie. “Be busy, date. You really want a guy? Behave like you don’t.” How does Cassie follow this advice? What is your philosophy when it comes to attracting someone?

20. Cassie lists facets of her life developed through her involvement in S.E.C.R.E.T.: entrepreneur, lover, business partner, boss, mentor, friend. Do you think she could have developed all of these aspects of herself without the organization’s help?

21. In your opinion, what really brought Cassie and Will back together?

22. Looking back over all three books in the trilogy, can you see other times when Jesse’s feelings for Matilda (and vice versa) were apparent? Or did that turn completely surprise you, as it did Cassie? How did you react to this relationship, considering the age difference and other factors?

23. What major lessons does Solange learn by the end of
S.E.C.R.E.T Revealed
? What is at the heart of her transformation? Beyond her reunion with Julius, what else has she achieved?

24. Why did it take Solange’s participation in S.E.C.R.E.T. to bring her and Julius together? What did she need to let go of to make room for this reunion?

25. S.E.C.R.E.T. is a fictional society dedicating to helping women achieve a sexual awakening. What are some ways you can create your own personal sexual awakening?