Seducing the Badman (Russian Bratva #2) (7 page)

Little does she know that all she must do is ask, and she will have whatever it is she wishes. Even if it is to leave me, I will give her anything. That makes me a pussy, I know, but when it comes to women, that is what I am. I aim to rectify this, this time around. Emiliya will not have the opportunity to feign shyness from me. I will not allow it.

I take everything off of my body except for my boxers. I usually sleep nude, but Emiliya would probably be terrified if she woke with my hard cock pressed against her perfect ass. And it will be, since I haven’t been laid in a few weeks.

I lie down and wrap my
kotik
in my arms, feeling her soft as fuck body pressed against mine. I have to hold myself back from taking her right here and now when she lets out a small moan and then snuggles into me.

I
WAKE UP SWEATING,
and there is something heavy on my stomach. I try to roll away, but the heaviness tightens around me and pulls me closer, making me pry open my eyes. I look around at my surroundings.

I am not in my room.
No
, my room is all white and plain. This space is painted dark blue and has brightly colored modern paintings on the walls. I slowly try to scoot away again, but what I can guess is an arm pulls me, slamming me against a hard body. I feel who must be Radimir and his… his…
himself
pressing against my ass, and I still.

“I like you here in my bed,
kotik
. Do not try to get away so quickly,” he murmurs, his breath hot against my neck.

One of Radimir’s hands starts to slowly rub against the bare skin of my stomach and I realize that I’m wearing nothing but my bra and panties.

“H-h-how did I get here?” I whisper, closing my eyes tightly. My body is melting into Radimir’s, welcoming his soothing, soft touch.

“I couldn’t leave you alone after everything last night. I am sorry for accusing you the way I did. It wasn’t fair and it wasn’t nice.” His lips touch my shoulder as his hand travels down to the waistband of my panties.

My stomach quivers and I suck in a breath at his intimate touch. This feels absolutely nothing like the one and only time I was intimate with a man.

“I want to touch you, Em. I want to feel you,” he murmurs against my ear. His breath is hot, and his lips touch my skin as his fingers dip just below my panties.

“I-I…” Words fail me, my body is burning for him. I want him to touch me. I want to feel his hands all over me, but what does that make me?
What does it all mean?

“I take care of you,
kotik
. I will make it good, believe me,” he pleads.

I bite my bottom lip and nod. What am I saving myself for, anyway? This is the man I have been given to, bartered for. Though the cause is different from my father’s, it has been a barter, nonetheless. I am still not free. I have never been, nor will I ever be free. But being trapped and kept by Radimir doesn’t seem like such a bad thing, anymore.

This man will soon be my husband, and I should try to make my life as joyful as possible.

“So sweet, Em, so very sweet,” he murmurs as his hand travels down to my center.

I feel him slowly run his finger through my pulsing, heated core before he rubs my clit softly. Radimir’s lips kiss behind my ear, sending a wave of want throughout my body. I have pleasured myself a few times, but never did it feel like this; never did my heart race like I was running a marathon; and never did I ache for more.

“Radimir,” I whimper, wrapping my hand around his strong forearm.

“Yes, Emiliya. Does that feel good, my little
kotik
?” His voice is deep and husky.

I arch my back, searching for more friction, for more…
just more
. Suddenly, one of his fingers slides inside of me and I gasp as he groans.

“So tight.
Fuck
,” he growls.

I can feel something inside of me building as my hips move of their own accord. I can’t help myself. I feel a bit dirty and wanton, but I want more and I want it
harder
. I want him. The man. Never has it felt this way—with my horrible experience or with myself.

“Radimir,” I cry, searching for more. Before I know, it I am on my back and he is above me, his hands on either side of my face.

“I must have you, Emiliya,” he announces. I gulp, looking at him with wide eyes.

What does this mean?

I don’t have time to ask any questions. Before I can take a breath, I feel a tearing inside of me. Then, all of a sudden, a white hot flash of pain overwhelms me as he enters me completely. I know that I am no longer a virgin, but after my body was torn through the first time, nothing has ever been inside of me. Years have passed and I feel as though I am reliving the horror all over again, at least the painful portion.

I cry out, tears streaming down my face, but Radimir must not notice or care. I feel nothing but a burning sensation as he moves inside of me—in and out of my body. I just want it to be over. I want to die, right here and right now.

“You feel so good,
kotik
,” he whispers against my neck as he nuzzles and kisses me.

I don’t care how good he thinks I feel. It hurts like hell! One of his hands wraps around my hip while the other slides between us and he starts to rub my clit. I can’t concentrate on anything but the pain in my hip from his fingers, and the pain of him sliding in and out of me.

“Come for me, Em. Fuck, you’re too tight,” he grinds out through a clenched jaw. I begin to sob, unable to do as he wishes.

He starts pushing into me even harder and faster, his deep grunts filling the room. When I think he is surely going to split me in half, he stops. I feel him pulsing inside of me for a few seconds before his body finally goes slack. He kisses my cheek, my neck, and my shoulder, easing out of me.

I roll to my side, away from him, and curl into a ball.
That was horrible
. I never want to do
that
again; but I fear he will want to do it repeatedly, and often. I thought when I did give myself to a man,
willingly
, it would be different.

Now I know the truth.

Radimir’s fingers slide down my naked spine and it makes me shiver, but not from want as it did before.
Now
I shiver with disgust, with pain, and with feelings of betrayal. I feel him stand from the bed and then the water in the bath begins to run.

Radimir is next to me a second later. He slowly lifts my body, carrying me toward the bathroom. He lowers me into the warm water, which makes me hiss when it touches my very sore center.

“Soak in the tub,
kotik
. It will ease some of your pain,” he whispers. I just close my eyes.

I don’t want to look into his beautiful,
cold
blue ones. I don’t want to be here. I want to go anywhere else. I want to be ignored again. I want my brother. I want anybody that gives half of a shit about me.

I soak in the tub for what seems like hours, or at least until the water turns cold and I am shivering. Radimir doesn’t appear; and though I am happy to be rid of him for the moment, I wish he cared. He pretended to care so much. Now that he has gotten what he wanted, he is nowhere around. I should have known his words of not touching me unless I wanted it—of caring for me no matter what, without any form of payback—I should have known that was nothing but a mouthful of lies.

All men lie
. Every man I have ever known has lied to get whatever it is that they want.

I dry off my body. Quickly, I run from Radimir’s room to my own. I find a pair of lounge pants that will not be constricting on my still aching body, and a tank top. I decide against a bra, because what would be the point in covering anything up anymore?

I walk downstairs and am surprised to see that Radimir is standing in the living room, talking to a man. He is tall, big, and broad, but not as muscular as Radimir. He turns his green eyes to me and I watch as they roam down my body, pausing at my breasts before he smirks.

I want to cover up, but I am too shocked. No man has ever openly ogled me.
Ever
. Radimir turns around and sees me. His eyes do the same; but when they stop at my breasts, instead of a smirk on his lips, his eyes turn a deep navy blue, and his jaw goes hard in what I can only guess is anger.

“Emiliya, go back to your room. I bring you lunch in a moment,” he barks harshly. I take a step back and then turn and hurriedly go back to my room.

I want to cry, but I don’t, I am tired of crying.
How was I to know that someone would be downstairs?
I tell myself that I am going to stand my ground, that I am not going to fall apart. I figure if I say it enough, it will become a fact.

“Food,” Radimir barks, throwing down a tray with a sandwich and a bag of chips.
I don’t even like chips
.

I choose to ignore him and look the other way. Suddenly, my body is being lifted from the floor and my chin is being held painfully with his thumb and forefinger, forcing me to look into his eyes. Cold and hard.

“Are you mad because I yelled at you while my new guard was staring at your tits? Forgive me for not wanting him to see my woman’s hard nipples.”

I try to wrench my face from his grasp, but he just pinches me harder, forcing me to stop.

“Answer me,” he barks. I pinch my lips together as my act of defiance.

“Fine. You don’t answer me, I’ll take it out on your ass.” I gasp in shock and he smiles, but he looks like the devil reincarnate.

“That’s right, you heard me. I’ll spank that perfect round ass of yours until it’s gleaming bright fucking red from my palm. That is, unless you want to answer me,” he says with a smirk firmly planted on his lips.

I growl and he just laughs, but it isn’t a kind laugh. Its demonic. I realize, for the first time, that this is not the man I thought he was. These are his true colors, and they are ugly and terrifying.

“I didn’t know someone would be downstairs,” I whisper, my body going slack.

I’m giving up the fight because I will never win in this world of men and war. I will never come out on top. I know how to submit. I know how to give up and do whatever is needed to make my life bearable. I just hoped that I would never have to do it with Radimir. I saw pieces of him that I thought were so different from my father, and I hoped too hard that he would be a completely different man.

“Good to remember for the future: men will be in and out of this house, and you should never walk around inappropriately. Unless you want them to watch you and possibly fuck you; and if that’s the case, then I can make arrangements,” he offers. A shudder runs through my body at this man
, this beast
. He cannot be human.

So affectionate just hours ago, and now so cold and heartless.

“Why are you being this way?” I ask with tears welling in my eyes.

“I have already had one whore and a bitch in my house for years; I’ll not tolerate another, unless you want to make me money at it.”

I want to scream.

I want to fight.

I want to call my brother and tell him of the horrible mistake he has made in trusting this man, but it would do no good.

“Do what you wish, Radimir. I will not stop you. I am your property,” I calmly state. He flinches from my words and lets me go, backing up as he just looks at me, conflicted.

“
Fuck
,” he breathes before he opens the door and slams it behind him.

I slink back down on the ground and I cry.
Again
.

I stay in my room the entire day and the next. Radimir comes inside every few hours and just looks at me without saying a word. Then he leaves me to stare at the wall from my curled up position on the bed.

On the third day, I am weak from lack of food and drink. I feel the bed dip down behind me, and the big arms I once felt safe in wrap around my body.

“I am sorry,” he murmurs, pulling me into him. I don’t respond. I can’t.

“Please,
kotik
. Drink and eat something. You are frightening me,” he whispers, sounding so very broken that I almost feel badly for him—
almost
.

I ignore him. Unwilling to speak. I want to leave. I want to leave him and leave this prison he’s put me in. But who am I kidding? This is the life I was born into, bred for. The life I will die in. I knew that this would not be an especially loving relationship, but the way he treated me at first, I had hope. Now, my hopes are dashed and I’m left feeling lifeless. Nothing matters.