Seven Years (5 page)

I tackled Austin, knocking him onto the cement and falling on my side. Michael made a sound like a donkey as he pulled air into his lungs and Austin rolled over to finish what he started.

I climbed on his back and curved my arm around his neck in a viselike hold. “Austin, no! You’ll kill him, you idiot.”

Michael catapulted to his feet while holding his throat and jogged the hell out of there. When Austin stood up, I lost my grip and fell on my back. He turned to go after Michael but changed his mind when he saw me laid out on the concrete.

“Christ, Lexi. You okay?”

He knelt down and looked me over. I disappeared in his frosty blue eyes—so pale they resembled a Siberian Husky’s. They were rimmed with inky black lashes and wolfish brows, which furrowed with concern.

“Lexi?”

“What are you doing here?” I asked, propping myself up on my elbows.

“Besides saving your ass from a dead man? Walking.”

I lurched up and pushed myself off the ground. Austin slid his large hand beneath my arm to help and I knocked it away. “I can do it myself,” I said.

“You always were stubborn,” he mumbled.

“Capable,” I countered, glaring up at him.

Up
. Because I swear Austin had sprouted a few inches in the last seven years. I mentally measured him to be just over six foot, but when we last saw each other, he was probably around five-eleven. I knew this because I was five-feet seven inches. And a quarter.

He stared down his nose. “Stubborn.”

I raised a brow. “You really want to fight with me in the middle of a parking lot? Why are you here, Austin? I know this isn’t the side of town you hang out in.”

He rubbed his jaw and scanned the parking lot once more. “I followed you to work.”

I blanched. “My shift started nine hours ago.”

Austin folded his thick, tattooed arms and belted me with a judgmental glare. “Can you drive?”

“Texas Department of Motor Vehicles seems to think so.”

Austin’s lips twitched. “Get in the car, then. I’ll wait.”

I brushed my dirty apron and lifted my purse from the ground, grabbing the lipstick that had rolled behind a tire. I peered over my shoulder; Austin stood with his hands deep in his pockets and I heard the sound of coins jingling as he looked around.

“Do you normally leave work this late?”

I didn’t answer because after what had just happened, I was too flustered and didn’t think it was an appropriate time to have a conversation.

Once inside my car, I started the engine and fought with the clutch. She sputtered and immediately died. I expected to see Austin laughing the way Beckett often did.

He wasn’t. His brows knitted and he looked like he was about to step in until the engine turned over and I got her running. What bothered me was the distracted look on his face. Austin looked like a man who was three ticks away from beating the holy shit out of someone.

And that someone was going to be Michael Hudson. I should have said something, but I drove off and watched him in the rearview mirror as he stalked toward the pizza shop with a heavy swing in his step.

I always believed Karma would come back to Michael for how cruel he was to me in high school. Karma just happened to be a man named Austin Cole.

On Friday afternoon, I picked up Maizy for our playdate
. It had become a tradition to go to a movie and then stop off at Pizza Zone. It gave my mom a break from reality so she could get a manicure or just take a nap. Maizy was such a good-hearted little girl, one who from an early age considered the feelings of others. She didn’t like to see anyone cry and always cleaned up without being asked. Maizy had her moments like any six-year-old, but she was my Maze, and I loved her unconditionally.

“Lexi?”

“Yeah?”

“Can I go play now?”

I took another sip of my soda and admired her sparkly blue eyes. Wes and I got the brown hair and eyes in the family, but Maizy was a little ray of sunshine who had the same enviable features as our mom.

I glanced at her plate. “Are you finished?”

She had only taken a few bites of cheese pizza and I knew the excitement of the noisy games and hyperactive kids was too much to resist.

Maizy flashed a bright smile. She’d lost one of her bottom baby teeth and the Tooth Fairy had paid her a visit.

I hated to be one of those people who force-fed a child, so I nodded and watched her run over to the play zone. It was a walled-off area with plastic tunnels and ropes to swing on. She kicked off her shoes by the entrance and waved before disappearing inside the first series of yellow tunnels with the other kids. Maizy mostly played by herself because even though she had just turned six, she hadn’t yet come out of her shell. It seemed like yesterday we were changing her diapers, and before too long, I’d probably be helping her pick out a dress for prom.

I thought about Austin. Had he gone after Michael, or was I reading too much into that? Austin had no right appearing out of nowhere and fighting my battles, although I was glad he’d shown up when he had. Still, he’d never once tried to contact me in all the time after Wes’s death. It shouldn’t have bothered me as much as it did, but he was such an integral part of our family that it was as if I’d lost two people that year instead of one. Austin had parents and siblings, but I’d never met them. I wasn’t even sure if they lived in the area.

I twirled my pigtails around my fingers while watching Maizy swing on one of the ropes.

Before I could draw a breath, Beckett slid in the chair in front of me. “Knew I’d find you here,” he said smugly.

Beckett had on that damn T-shirt I hated, the one that said “Meathead.” It was just the sheer principle of a man proudly labeling himself as an idiot.

“Beckett,” I warned. “Let’s not do this here.”

He narrowed his lashless eyes. “You got a right to be mad, Lexi. I fucked up. But I’m not perfect—no one is. You’ve got your fair share of baggage, and I’ve got mine.”

I crossed my arms and leaned back in the plastic chair. “Are you calling your infidelity…
baggage
?”

He snorted, staring at my head. “You look ridiculous with your hair that way. Take it down so we can have a real conversation. I can’t talk to you like this.”

“How about you not talk to me at all? We’re done, Beckett. That’s nonnegotiable.”

“Lex,” he said, placing his hand firmly on my arm.

I bolted out of the chair and headed in the other direction. Leaving him was one of the most difficult things I had done in my life, and we had already gone through all this. Now he was picking at a scab and trying to make it bleed again.

“Lex, wait,” he called out. I passed the pinball machines and he caught up with me by skeeball.

I turned around, tired of all the running. “Stop following me, Beck. It’s creeping me out. I don’t want to keep reliving this over and over. Don’t you get it? There’s no going back and undoing what you did.”

He gripped my shoulders. “Look, babe, I’m sorry. Please forgive me. It was a mistake and I won’t—”

“Save it,” I interrupted. “You’ll never know what that did to me, and it’s not something I can easily get over. Maybe some women can, but you’ve always known that was the deal breaker for me. Not only would I always be wondering where you were when you came home late, but I’d always know that I wasn’t enough for you. I loved you, Beckett. I trusted you, and you broke that.”

His grip tightened when I tried to shrug him away. “Lex, you know you’re the only girl for me, right? You’re the girl I want to marry.”

I snapped.

My hands flew out in a karate-chop move I must have seen on one too many Kung Fu movies. A stunned look crossed his face when his arms were knocked away.

“Fine! Goddammit, I’m just trying to make it right again. Fucking
bitch
!” he yelled, storming out of the room.

There I stood amid ringing bells, screaming kids, and arcade machines.

Shaking.

I had to pull it together before my sister saw me have a nervous breakdown.

“Maizy, stay right where you are and don’t go anywhere,” I shouted, holding my finger out. “I’m going potty.”

She nodded and I walked to the restroom, only a few feet away. But once I entered the empty hall, I couldn’t go any farther. I allowed my body to slide down the wall and I covered my eyes as a tidal wave of pain surfaced.

I’d been with Beckett for
two
years, and through our ups and downs, I had started to imagine a life with him. One that might have involved kids, or maybe even going to college and figuring out what I wanted to do in life besides working a cash register. It took me two years to give him all of my heart, and he threw it away in one night. I’d thought he loved me. How many other times were there? Didn’t matter.

Once was enough.

“Lexi?”

Two heavy hands covered my knees. “What’s wrong?” The controlled anger belonged to Austin Cole.

My stupid tears. Damn them. I was already trying to get myself together and now my emotions switched gears to another part of my life that was an open wound.

“Why did you leave us?” I finally asked. The words felt like a sword because I’d said them a number of times over Wes’s grave. It hurt to breathe for the first year after his death.

Austin sighed hard. The kind of sigh that had a long, regretful story behind it. “Lexi, I can’t talk about this with you right now. Are you okay?”

Finally wiping my tears, I glanced up. Austin crouched in front of me wearing a white shirt and a leather-rope necklace with a round medallion made of silver. The tattoos on his upper arms briefly caught my attention, but when his sharp blue eyes cut through me, I looked away.

“I’m fine,” I lied.

He lowered his head with a doubtful glare. “No, you’re not.”

“What are you doing here? Why do you keep showing up out of the blue at the worst times?”

“I’m back for good, Lexi. I want to set things straight and there’s a lot I need to tell you, but this isn’t the place. You tell me when’s a good time and we’ll get together.”

I sniffed and gave a barely perceptible nod.

Austin let go of my knees and reached forward, sliding his hands down my hair with a short grin.

“It’s Pretty Pigtail Day,” I said in a small voice. “I do this with Maizy a couple of times a month.” I didn’t even bother explaining who Maizy was.

Austin didn’t laugh. “It reminds me a little bit of you at that age. I remember you wearing your hair like this, or sometimes braided in the back. Come on, let’s get up.” He hooked his hands beneath my arms and lifted me to my feet. “You sure you’re okay?”

Before I could answer, his thumb slid across my cheek, wiping away a tear. All those stupid rehearsals I’d played out in my head of telling him off were stuck in pause, and I felt ashamed I’d later be rewinding this moment, wishing I had tossed him into the bin of plastic balls.

He reached in his back pocket and pulled out a business card, placing it in my hand. “Call me when you’re ready to talk, Ladybug.”

I lifted my hand and admired a plain off-white card. Austin’s name was on the front with a phone number beneath. A symbol of a bow and arrow filled in the right-hand corner, but nothing indicated what he did for a living. Did that mean he was Robin Hood?

When I looked up, Austin was gone.

The card went into my purse and I decided to take Maizy home. Austin had left the ball in my court, and while it felt good to know the mystery of his disappearance would be solved, it also irritated me. Now in order to get any answers, I’d have to go crawling back to him, and that didn’t leave me in a position of power. I didn’t know how to feel about it, but I knew one thing: panic flooded my veins like rocket fuel when I didn’t see Maizy in the play zone.

“Maizy?”

My heart raced and I whirled around, dizzy with fear. I frantically searched the tunnels, peering through the clear plastic domes just to make sure she wasn’t hiding.

“Maizy? Come out from hiding! It’s time to go!”

When she didn’t answer, I went into a complete state of panic, screaming her name and pacing around. Kids were turning to stare and a few moms lifted their chins and glanced around the room.

Oh God, I’ve lost her
.

After I’d combed the room five times and scoured the bathrooms, I ran out of the restaurant to the brightly lit entrance in front of the parking lot.

“Lexi! Lexi!” a bright little voice yelled out.

My head swung to the right. Beckett stood motionless beside my little sister, holding her hand.

“Maizy,” I gasped, my arms flying out. She let go of his hand and ran into my outstretched arms. “Don’t you ever leave me like that, do you understand?”

“Uncle Beck gave me a ring,” she said, holding up a plastic toy affixed to her finger.

I glared at him and he shrugged, walking away.

But something else made me uneasy—Maizy would have never left that room by herself. Beckett lured her out of there on purpose just to scare me.

It worked.

He’d resorted to a low tactic by taking advantage of my sister’s trust in order to threaten me. At least, that’s what it felt like. Beckett wasn’t aggressive, nor did I take him for the kind of guy who would kidnap a child. He had a mouth on him when he drank, but I’d never seen him do anything like this before, and what gave me chills was how smooth he was when I caught him in the act, and how casually he walked away.

“Let’s go, Maizy.”

I tossed her ring in the trash and she started to cry, so I picked her up. “Sweetie, don’t be mad at me.”

Tears streamed down her ruddy cheeks and her mouth was agape. “But that was
my
ring,” she whined.

“Maze, can I tell you something? It’s a secret.”

She nodded and wiped her nose.

“Never take a ring from a boy unless he’s your prince.”

Something sparked in her teary eyes.

“Remember how you said you wanted to marry a prince? Well, if you take a ring from another boy before you meet the prince, then he won’t marry you.”

Panic flooded her eyes. “But I took
that
one!”

“No, it doesn’t count because I threw it away. That’s the rule. Your big sis has to take it off and then the spell is undone.”

She smiled and hugged my neck. Maizy loved stories about magic and spells. In her eyes, the world was nothing but a fairytale. Adults were blind to the magic that existed and only little kids could see it.

“Come on, little girl. Time for us to go home. You know, you’re getting way too heavy for me to carry,” I grunted out dramatically. “Are you sure you’re not hiding a moose in your pocket?” She giggled and rested her head on my shoulder.

That did the trick, and Maizy hummed one of her favorite songs for the rest of the ride home.

***

After a grueling day at work on Saturday, I threw my keys on the bar and collapsed on my sofa. The neighbor downstairs decided to have a party and the music thumped against the floor, rattling one of the pictures on my wall.

All these months, I’d managed to successfully avoid telling my mom about my breakup with Beckett. She liked him, and that made it more difficult. After the other night, I decided to let the cat out of the bag because I was afraid of him showing up at her house. When I finally confessed, I left out the part with Maizy because I still didn’t know what to make of it myself. It wasn’t a deliberate threat, but it just left me with a sick feeling. Mom didn’t say anything and it was probably for the best. If she had defended him and gone on about forgiveness, I might have sped out of there at ninety miles per hour in “angry mode.”