Shadowborn (2 page)

Intoxicating energy pulsed in my abdomen. A moan stopped in my throat when I remembered I wasn’t alone. I cracked a closed lid to see if my guard had noticed.

“Are you in control?” Nix squinted at me. “You’re shaking again, and your Light is really … dark.”

Not only did Parthalan’s power enjoy pain but also the awakening of my libido.

Rubbing my temples, I stared needles at Nix. “I’ve been in control for a whole month without losing my temper and going on the rampage. Why are you so worried now?”

He gave me a raised brow that made me think I’d overlooked something obvious. “Has it occurred to you that you’ve held control for the entirety of Liam’s absence?”

My heart settled in the basement of my soul. “Coincidence.” I tucked my long, golden hair behind my ears, though the brisk wind sent it flying again.

Fists clenched, Nix averted his gaze. “If you say so.”

I resumed pacing and fought the urge to smack him. He couldn’t be right. Liam loved me, and I loved him; that should have made everything right with me, not turn me into an angry rhino who could take over others’ will like an evil puppeteer.

Seconds ticked by like days. My body thrummed, and my mind seemed two sizes too large for my skull. The wind picked at my hair and threw it into my face again, so I bundled it over my shoulder and twisted it in my shaking hands. I needed to touch Liam. I needed to know we were still okay.

“You can’t meet the humans like this, Li. You look like an addict too far from your last blow.” Nix had moved in front of me, sidestepping to cut off my attempts to dart around him.

I glared and thrust my hands toward his chest, but he shoved me against the wall.

Barely able to speak, I whispered, “Neasa is going to be pissed if you ruin this stupid dress she made to match your shirt. Now let me go, or I’ll break your arms.”

“No, you won’t. You need to keep it together today, so I’m going to help you do that. What I do, I do for the good of the world.” Wearing a grin, he pressed his cheek against mine. His Light grew more intense, encompassing us both in an amber glow. Our energy, as I’d grown to know over the last few months, reflected our moods, though I’d never seen that shade from Nix before.

Against my better judgment, I spread trembling fingers up his chest, into the satin of his hair. Sweet pleasure and calm spread through me, warm and slightly intoxicating, like a hit of Jack Daniels straight up.

“Better?” he said against my ear, stroking palms along my bare arm.

I nodded and shivered, though it had nothing to do with the winter day. Our gazes met. Mesmerizing gold with flecks of silver spiraled around his pupil. No matter how much I tried to force myself to look away, I couldn’t. His lips hovered close enough that his warm breath fanned across my chin. Another shiver raced through me.

He trailed the backs of his fingers down my cheek. “Beautiful.”

I trembled, watching helplessly as he closed the distance and brushed his lips against mine. An electric jolt sent a thrill all the way to my toes and in every place between.

“What the fuck is this?” Liam’s voice broke my trance. He appeared beside us, fist poised and quivering, but it never moved forward as if something—or someone—held him in place.

My heart jumped into my throat.
Dammit
! It took a second to steady my jittery legs before I forced myself out of Nix’s warm aura. “Let him go, Nix.”

Still grinning, my captain stepped away and shoved his hands into his pockets.

Yeah, Mr. Innocent. Right.

Liam grinned, one that held more than a hint of malevolence.

Nix swayed and pressed his palms to his forehead. “Ouch. What’s happening?”

“Liam can suppress our abilities,” I mumbled, still sore from the time he’d done it to me. “That’s his
cumhacht
.”

The rage in Liam’s stare bored into me, and although it wasn’t directed at me, it still burned. His short, dark hair spiked up a little along the top into a modern, chic bed-head style. He wore a tailored, black suit that fit him to perfection.

Caught up in his presence, I drank in every inch of him. My temperature rocketed.

“What were you doing with him?” Liam said.

I shook myself, blinked. “What?”

“It’s not her fault.” Nix flexed and relaxed his fingers. “She needed a stress release before we meet the humans, and you were late as usual.” Hatred flashed across his face, leaving it twisted into a sneer. “One of us has to take care of her.”

Liam launched toward Nix, but I beat him there and braced both hands against his chest. “We don’t have time for this.” I was forced to tell Nix about my outings with Liam so he wouldn’t think I’d gone missing and give me the third degree every time I returned. Only he, Gallagher and Donovan knew about Liam’s and my extracurricular activities. I peered over my shoulder at my captain before returning my attention to my boyfriend. “From either of you. I need to talk to Liam before we go.”

Pointing a finger at my captain to keep him in place, I took Liam’s hand and guided him toward the edge of the trees, trying to ignore his Unseelie power crawling up my arm like liquid fire. If the Seelie Court found out about us, they’d probably try to oust me. If it weren’t for my promise to my mother to return peace to our people, I’d have left on my own.

I couldn’t afford to let him distract me with his charm before I disproved Nix’s accusations. I looked around the frozen landscape. “Where’s my father?”

“He’ll meet us there.” Liam’s voice came out in a growl. After a moment, his jaw stopped flexing; he stepped back and smoothed his hands down his suit. The gesture evoked memories I didn’t want to resurface.

“Don’t do that.” I forced steady inhalations through my nose and exhalations through my mouth like Gallagher had taught me.

“Do what?” Liam tugged at the sleeves of his white shirt, aligning them with his black jacket.

I peered at him from behind a curtain of my hair. “Parthalan used to primp like that, tugging at his suit all the time. I don’t want to think about him.”

Uttering his name coaxed his energy to life. It sang through my soul, a lullaby to lure me into releasing it. The temptation to let it go, to allow the dark tendrils of glorious power to crawl through me almost overwhelmed, but I forced it back.

“I’m sorry. I forgot he used to do that.” Liam gathered me into his arms and kissed my forehead.

“Where’s Gallagher?” I needed something to distract us, and my advisor, sticking his big nose in my business, would do the trick.

Liam smiled as his fingertips trailed over my ear and continued south along my throat.

My sigh formed a white cloud of frost in front of me.

“I’ll find him.” He glowered at Nix before heading for the trees with a limping gait.

Liam? Limping? Did that have something to do with whatever Nix hinted at? I considered going after the king to demand answers but decided to spend my anger on my captain instead. Liam would have his turn.

I returned to Nix. “Just tell me one thing.
”

He gave a little bow. “I told you I’d never lie to you, and I’m a fae of my word.”

“Did you know Liam was almost here when you”—I made an awkward gesture to my lips, my face ablaze—“did what you just did to me?”

His grin, tainted with a hint of macho satisfaction, never faded. “Yes. And I think the word you’re looking for is kiss.”

I rubbed my forehead, unable to reach the ache brewing inside my skull. “Why? Why would you cause me this headache, today? We’re supposed to be helping the humans, not entering into another pissing contest.”

“He’s arrogant.” Amusement faded from Nix’s expression and left his lips turned down at their corners. “He assumes you’re going to wait around here for him. I want him to know there are others here who will love you in his absence. You deserve better.”

My mouth gaped open, and my brows crowded together.
Did he say he loved me?
I shoved that little nugget aside
.
“Did you give a thought to what I want?” My fingers fiddled with the embroidery on the blue dress. I needed to distract my hands—hands that itched to touch him again—or smack him. I couldn’t decide which desire was greater.

“You’ll always be free to decide for yourself.” He smiled, one of smug satisfaction. “That doesn’t mean I won’t present you with some options. That scum doesn’t own you. Don’t deny yourself pleasure because you feel some obligation to the Unseelie King.” A brisk wind sent Nix’s shoulder-length hair flying back from his face. His intense stare hardened my muscles as he moved and stood about as close as I could handle without telling him off. He’d learned well. “As a fae who has now felt the touch of other Seelie Sidhe, you’ll go crazy waiting around for him.”

“What does that mean?” I kicked a stone that went skittering across the ground and tossed my hands up. “By you touching me, you somehow … changed my need for Seelie touch?”

“I simply showed you what you’ve been missing.” Grinning, he turned and walked toward the last gate along the wall—a portal to the human’s command center. “I’ll meet you there.”

I rubbed at my tingling lips where Nix’s kiss still lingered.
Damn
.

Liam returned with Gallagher, who wore his favorite tweed suit and matching bow tie. I had to admit I liked my eccentric advisor’s white hair twisted into dreads—Brígh’s handiwork. They glowed under the sunlight, contrasting even more against his black skin.

“I need to talk to Liam before we go,” I said. “Nix went on ahead to wait for us.”

“You and I must also speak before we enter.” Gallagher’s clouded eyes pointed right at me as they normally did, as if though blind, he saw everything with ease. His vision came from telepathically linking to someone else and using their eyes. Creepy, but nifty, too. He raised a brow, switching back and forth between Liam and me. A crawly sensation in my brain let me know he dug deeper than normal.

“Stay out of my head, Gallagher.” I poked a finger into his chest.

He nodded and started toward the portal. “Apologies, my queen.”

“Lila!” My fingers curled into fists. “My name is Lila.” When I could no longer hear him chuckling, I turned to Liam, who stood rigid a few feet away. “Look, I’m sorry, all right? I don’t know what came over me.”

“So Nix is going to play dirty now, is he?” Liam set his guarded stare on me.

“This isn’t a game, so stop it. You were limping just now. Tell me why.”

He stared at his shiny loafers. “It’s nothing.”

“Don’t give me that line of crap. You heal faster than me. If you’re still hurting, then someone must have damn near killed you before you left the Black City.”

Nudging something with his foot, he remained mute.

“You want me to trust you. This isn’t the way to make that happen.” I touched his face. He winced. My heart fell. “Drop your glamour.”

Hard eyes focused on my shoulder. “No.”

Dread, that Nix had been telling the truth, settled around me. “So this is the way it’s going to be? I count the minutes for an entire month with barely a word. You show up here throwing fists, concealing injuries from me and won’t tell me why.” I let out a frustrated grunt. “I defended you, but I guess Nix was right.”

Mouth dropped open, Liam said, “Right about what?” He grabbed me by the face and crushed his lips to mine, his breath shuddering. His tongue slid against mine, rendering me a pulsing lump of need before he pulled back. “Please, don’t be angry.” His lips parted a few times before he added, “I’m … afraid.”

Come again?
My brows pinched together, and I brushed my fingers along his temple. “Afraid of what?”

His forehead rested against mine. “What if I’m not up to this? What if I’m not strong enough to be king?”

A hurricane of scenarios sped through my head. My stomach lurched as I considered how bad his situation must have been to make the fearless Liam admit something scared him. “What happened to bring on this doubt?”

“I swear I’ll tell you later, after we get this day over with.”

I put space between us. “Why is it always later? Just like every time I ask you what happened with the Magi that hired your guys to steal the selkies’ skins months ago.”

“Tonight, I promise. We’ll find a place and spend the night wrapped up in one another.”

Deflated, I hugged myself. “And where will we go this time? Under a pine tree? In a dark corner of an abandoned building again? In the midst of mold and rats? Where is there in this world that fae eyes can’t see, Liam?”

“You didn’t seem to mind last time.” A dark grin curled his full lips. “You seemed to enjoy yourself. More than a few times if I remember correctly.”

I forced away the memory of that night, though a shudder rocketed up my core. “Don’t change the subject. You know I love being with you, but this sneaking around like criminals, this longing for you is driving me insane.”

“What are you saying?” The hurt in his voice brought pain into every part of me.

I whirled around and stared at the towering, granite wall. Months of hurt and loneliness speared me square in the heart. “I’m saying we need to go. We have people to help, and our own still to reunite. Whatever this is we’re doing together is going to have to wait.” I sprinted to the cavern and stepped inside.

A yellow distortion shimmered and spiraled on the polished wall. I pressed my body close until the portal sucked me inside. Cold and dizzying, the void tugged at my body and made it impossible to tell which direction was up. Every cell in me seemed to come apart and reassemble a few times before I arrived inside the lobby of the new coalition headquarters. At least I’d grown accustomed to using otherworldly modes of transport without tossing my cookies the way I used to.
Go, me.

White sofas sat in a huddle in front of the walls made of frosted glass. Lavender air freshener stung my nose.

Liam emerged behind me, remaining by the portal while I made my way to Gallagher.

“Are you well?” Gallagher offered me his hand, but as usual, I didn’t take it.

“Effing peachy. Can we get on with this?” I hated that Gallagher had put his foot down on my language. He’d said something about the f-word fueling my anger. I’d have told him to go eff himself, but it just didn’t have the same ring.