"Shady Bizzness: " Life as Eminem's Bodyguard in an Industry of Paper Gangsters" (11 page)

I got off the phone with them and called Rowe, Dre’s ex-bodyguard
out in California, and was like, “Yo, what is going on, man? Paul just called
and told me that Kurupt’s bodyguard has been killed, ” and he was like,
“Yeah, man, I heard. I’m trying to find out if it’s my boy because he had
two bodyguards that he used. ” I said, “Well, they said this guy’s name was
Dwayne. ” And Rowe said, “Well, naw that ain’t my partner, man, but I’m
going to call you back. ” So, he got some information and called me back,
and he was like, “Ya, man, this is the part of the game we go through that
cats don’t understand; our life is on the line every day. Anytime could be
your last moment. ” And I told him how me, Slim, and Paul actually agreed
to continue recording here in Detroit, and that if they needed Dre to do
something they would fly him or his reels in, and that would be the best
thing to do. Rowe got a kick out of that and was like, “You know, that’s a
damn shame that a man had to die for them to respect and understand
how severe this shit is. ” And I said, “You know what, Rowe? That’s the
same thing I’m saying. ”We kicked it for a little bit on the phone, and
when we got off the phone, I sat and prayed for my man and his family.

By this time it was pretty late, and I went upstairs and looked in my
elder son’s room and stared at him while he was asleep, just realizing how
blessed I am and thinking about my man’s situation who is gone now. He’ll
never be able to look at his kids again. And I was just really realizing how
blessed I am and just appreciating every moment I have. After I looked
at my older boy, I tucked him in and gave him a kiss on the forehead and
told him that I loved him and I was glad to be home, and I said that with
a tear in my eye. It really hurt, you know, to see somebody die in the line
of duty like that and realize that could have been you. After I tucked my
son in, I went in my room, where my wife and baby boy were. At this time,
he was about seven or eight months old. I had been on the road so long I
couldn’t even remember my son’s exact age at the time. Anyway, they were
sleeping peacefully. I’m looking at them, and as my baby was sleeping, he
had kind of a little smile on his face; I guess he was dreaming about little
angels—and that moment was a heavenly moment. My son’s smile meant
to me that everything was going to be all right as long as I kept God in my
corner. I look back now and reflect on Psalm 1:24. Verses two and three
say it best: “If it had not been for the Lord who was on our side, when men
rose up against us they would have swallowed us alive when their wrath
was kindled against us. ”

I got a call from Paul around noon regarding the early departure.
Instead of us leaving that Friday before we had to do “Saturday Night
Live, ” he wanted us to leave that Wednesday. And I was like, “Man, you
know what? I’m not leaving Wednesday. I’m leaving Saturday. I’ve already
talked to Rock and Noel, and they said they would cover for me. ” Paul
agreed to that arrangement, so it was cool. I wanted to stay in Detroit
longer because I had a lot of loose ends I had to tie up and had to get my
family situation together. The home life was cool, but the marriage was
still suffering. Trying to make up for months in a matter of days just can’t
be done.

Later on that evening, the wife and I got into a big-ass blowout,
probably the biggest dispute we’ve ever had. The first thing I did, which
was during the midst of the argument, was call Paul and tell him that I
changed my mind and had decided to come out on Wednesday with Slim,
so to get me a ticket. He said, “Are you sure?” And I said, “Yeah, definitely
get a ticket for me. I’m positive I’m not going to wait until Saturday. I’m
coming out Wednesday. There are a lot of things going on at the home
front, and I need to get away. ” Basically, hell was about to erupt at that
point because I was frustrated, and she was frustrated. I wondered whether
this road or this music thing was pulling my life apart—was I changing,
was she changing, what was going on, and what was the deal?

One of my wife’s biggest points was that I wasn’t helping around
the house. I was like, “What the fuck do you mean I’m not helping?
I’m away on the road. I send my entire money home, I’m getting home
improvements made, and I’m paying all the bills. When I come home, I’ve
done my work—there’s nothing else for me to do. So, don’t nag me about
doing anything because I am doing my part. ” She would say, “Well, you
could at least help wash some dishes, etc. , ” and I can honestly admit I
probably was on an ego trip because I felt like I was paying the bills, I was
the head of the household, and that I didn’t have to do any more than
what I was doing. I felt like I wasn’t out playing, I was out working, and
I was paying all the bills, everything was taken care of. I can honestly say
that was selfish on my part. Time tends to heal all wounds though, and it
was only a matter of days before I was scheduled to go back out on the
road. It was strange because when I was away I couldn’t wait to get home,
and once I was home for a couple of days, I couldn’t wait to get back on
the road.

It was Tuesday, and I was supposed to leave Wednesday, so I had
a lot to do that day. I ended up changing my flight to that Saturday to
spend quality time with my family, and that was the best decision I’ve ever
made.

I was home playing with my sons, and we were having fun. I was
looking at my baby boy’s christening pictures, which I had missed. I
noticed how much he had grown from two months to nine months. He
had teeth coming in, he had gotten bigger, and he was starting to try to
say some words. I was trying to remember the months in between two
and nine months of his life, and I couldn’t. It really started to bother me.
Fortunately, my wife and mother-in-law, two good, supportive women, took
a lot of pictures in my absence to keep me abreast of how he was growing.
Therefore, I was able to take part in his growth vicariously. A picture may
be worth a thousand words but there is nothing like being there. I missed
all that. I sacrificed so much to help make Slim successful, and he didn’t
appreciate it at all. One day when Slim grows up, he’ll understand.

A few days passed, and I was all packed up, ready to leave for at least
a month. My wife and kids dropped me off at the airport. That was always
the saddest part because I could envision my wife and kids watching me
until I disappeared into the crowd.

My
first stop was New York, where I met up with Slim, Paul, DJ
Head, Proof, Rock, and Noel. We had “Saturday Night Live” to do that
night, and Dre and Snoop were going to perform “Still Got Love for the
Streets, ” and Slim and Dre were going to perform “Forgot About Dre.
” This is where the serious bullshit began. I got to New York, and I was
pissed because I had to catch a cab. It was mad hectic out there. I couldn’t
catch up with anyone to find out what hotel to go to, and there I was in
the cab with the meter running. Finally, Mark called me back with the
information. Once again, Paul hadn’t handled his business properly. The
room was paid for, but they wanted me to pay ahead for incidentals. They
wanted me to leave a deposit on the bar. I had to call Paul and wait for him
or Mark to call me back to get that taken care of. This day was off to a bad
start already. Finally, I got to the room. I hooked up with Rock and Noel
from J&A Security, who covered for me on my days off.They told me Slim
didn’t want to get out of bed. “Why didn’t y’all get him out of bed?” Slim
claimed he was too tired to work. He was blowing off a $10, 000 photo
shoot that the label had already paid in full. I called Mark and told him, “It
seems like y’all can’t get shit done unless I am here. What’s the deal?”

Mark said he was in the studio for seventeen hours last night, and
they didn’t get in until seven this morning. That’s how it was all the time
in California. I’m used to that. Slim said, “Fuck the photo shoot, and fuck
the magazine!” He was tired, plus he had his mistress, Kessia, with him.
I said, “Well, he is the boss, so let him do what he wants to do. Y’all are
going to learn that if he doesn’t want to do something, then leave him
be. If he wants to let the record company recoup ten grand because he
missed the shoot, then that’s his business. ” Mark asked if I could convince
him to get ready. “I’ll do it, but y’all shouldn’t have scheduled that shit
so close together. That is the difference between you and me. When we
were in California, I knew that after an all-night session in the studio,
nothing was going to happen the next morning. You should know better
than to schedule something for Slim before three in the afternoon. The
man is tired. Let him rest. He has to do Saturday Night Live tonight and
everything. I’m not fucking with him!”

Slim blew off the photo shoot, and I went to get him together at
four in the afternoon. Slim was like, “Yo, what’s up, Naz? Do you believe
this shit? They scheduled this photo shoot all early, and, shit, Paul has
been calling up here talking all that shit, man. I need my sleep, man!”That
was one of the biggest things in Slim’s little world. The first was Hailey,
and second was his sleep. Then make sure you got his Vicodin, his E,
his Bacardi, his Burger King, and his Taco Bell. Oh, and some fresh gear,
which Mark always provided for him. Oh, and Niketown! Nothing else
existed to him. Slim was running his mouth about how Mark and Paul
were talking shit to him about his not getting up to do the photo shoot.
Slim was in the studio all night doing a song for Royce Da 5’9”’s album. I
told Slim, “Well they fucked up, man. They should know by now that you
need to get your sleep. ” I turned on Slim’s shower like, “Come on, man.
We got to make this move, we got to bounce. ” By this time Kessia was up,
and she was telling me how long they were in the studio. I told her it was
like that every day in California. I said they should know better than this
because he needs at least ten hours of sleep—at least.

We all headed out, and by this time word got out that Slim Shady
was staying at this hotel, and there was a shitload of groupies out front.
Unfortunately, that was the only exit we could take. Slim signed a few
autographs.We all loaded up in the limo and Yukon Denali and headed to
the venue where they film Saturday Night Live. The Saturday Night Live
staff told us no smoking weed in the dressing rooms. Everybody agreed
until Snoop and Dre came through with the “sticky icky. ” We got it all on
tape, with Snoop showing everybody how to smoke weed. Snoop would
inhale it, exhale it out his nose, then suck it back in through his mouth—
it was amazing. I had never seen any shit like that before. We were there
eight hours because we had to film the show in its entirety as a practice
run, then do the show live.

Security was extra tight, due to what had recently happened to
Kurupt’s bodyguard. We didn’t know whether it was an East Coast beef
or gang related, we just wanted to take the extra measures to make sure
that everyone was safe. The show went smoothly, and they all rocked it,
and we went back and chilled at the hotel. It was at this point that Slim’s
staff found out Paul and Slim would be taking a separate flight. Jimmy
Iovine arranged for the two of them to catch $10, 000 flights.This was how
Paul decided to spend Slim’s bonus from Interscope. Slim had earned
this bonus from performing on Saturday Night Live. They would fly on
Concord jets from New York to London.Those flights are usually seven or
eight hours, but on a Concord jet it could be reduced to an hour. The rest
of us were like, “Why didn’t he take the twenty grand and share it among
the crew instead of spending it on the plane ride that would get them
there quicker for no reason?” Plus, I was supposed to be his bodyguard, so
why was I not going with Slim? Eventually, Slim was going to find himself
alone. Paul may have been a big guy, but if some shit went down all he
could do was call a criminal lawyer.

Slim and Paul left at 5:30 a. m. on October 25th, and this was the
beginning of the European tour. I call it the “European turmoil” because
nothing went the way it was planned. One of the biggest complaints from
everyone was that Slim had spent seven grand on Kessia’s plane ticket.
He made sure she flew first class from Florida to New York, then first class
from New York to London, and everywhere else with us around Europe.
The crew really felt like that was a slap in the face. It was an insult. It
basically added insult to injury. Flights in Europe are already small. I was
crammed next to an old lady who refused to give me the aisle seat. She
wanted to be able to talk to her sister during the flight. Her feet weren’t
even touching the ground. She had to be all of four foot nothing. I was
like, Oh shit, here we go. I squeezed into my seat, and I thought to myself
that this old lady better not even think of the armrest. I was going to bogart the armrest, at least I was running that shit.

That’s how I got back at her. I was all balled up, and this old lady
was sitting there swinging her feet. We were all uncomfortable. DJ Head
is a big guy, too, and he was cramped, as well. I was pissed because Slim’s
mistress was in first class, comfortable and eating the finest foods, and we
were cramped up eating leftover refrozen shit! We were pissed because he
spent $7, 000 flying some female out, but he couldn’t even take care of us.
When we ask for a raise of $100 or $200 a week, we can’t get it.Where are
your priorities? We are showing you loyalty so show us some respect on
the financial end.We found out about the amount of money that Slim was
paying for Kessia to fly to Europe from Paul when we were in Hawaii. Paul
was bragging to Proof and I that Slim was flying Kessia out to Europe.We
were like, “Cool. ” Then Paul said he was spending seven grand to do it.
Paul said, “Yeah, Slim’s big-balling now, he’s spending seven grand to fly
this girl out. ” Proof was like, “What the fuck! I can’t even get a raise, and
he is spending seven grand on this girl? Y’all always act like y’all don’t
have any money, yet you can fly her out like this!” Paul tried to laugh it
off and said to Proof that they spent money on him and never asked to be
repaid. Proof was like, “That’s not the point! He has a bodyguard that you
fly out in coach, and he is the biggest thing on the plane! You can’t even
put him in business class or get him a bulkhead seat, but you have her
in first class! That’s not right!” I said, “I know it’s not right, but that’s just
how they do it, man. ”That really put us at the back of the bus. Proof went
off, and Paul didn’t like that. Proof worked hard, and he was the positive
vibe for everybody. He kept everyone mentally together. He took care of
Slim as far as making sure all the shows’ formats were tight, and all he
wanted was a little respect for everybody. To see Slim throwing around
seven grand like that, it made us see things differently.

When I dislocated my shoulder protecting Slim, he promised me
some help financially. Paul declined that, and I asked if I could have an
advance from the next tour. I should have been completely compensated,
as if I were still working. Proof was going through some financial hardships
because when they weren’t touring they weren’t getting paid. Proof asked
for an advance, but it took them two weeks to get it to him. Slim and Paul
showed where their loyalty was. We knew where our loyalty was, but we
weren’t sure about them anymore. It was like a slap in the face for us. We
had nothing against Kessia, but we wondered, where do we fit in? Why do
we have to get treated like shit? That made us feels like third-class citizens.
It reminded us where we stood when we made Slim the VIP that he is. It
left a salty taste in our mouths, and we weren’t going to eat that anymore.
It started the tour off on the wrong foot, as well.

Finally, after three crappy-ass
flights, we arrived in Oslo, a small
spot in Germany. Everybody reflected on what had just happened, from
the first-class thing to the Concord jets, and we all felt like we were at
the bottom of the barrel. In our downtime that is what we talked about.
We were like, “Damn. We have from the 25th of October to the 17th of
November to deal with this Europe shit. ” I wasn’t feeling Europe at all
this second time around, especially with three weeks of bad water and
pork, which none of us ate. The food was totally different, and European
people from time to time tend to act a little weird. We were trying to
adjust. I was like, Damn, I’m on the other side of the world, and my wife
and kids are at home.

I hoped that nothing happened back home like it did the last
time I was in Europe. The last time I was in Europe, my wife was in an
automobile accident. She was sitting at a traffic light and this guy came
along and broadsided her. She had to go to the doctor, and thank God she
wasn’t hurt. I was in Europe and had no way of finding out if anything did
happen. Luckily, I checked my voice mail that day, and she left a message
letting me know what happened. At the same time this happened, my
wife’s sister went into the hospital. Plus, her mother was scheduled to
have an operation. I knew my wife was under a lot of stress and pressure.
It was a mess, and I felt like I needed to be home. I knew if I went home I
would feel like I should be on the road. I had a lot of things on my mind,
as well, and I felt useless and worthless. I had some soul-searching to do
because it was no longer clear to me where I stood.

Oslo was no big deal show-wise, other than throwing one guy off
the stage and out the door. That was the first time a crowd ever cheered
for me when I threw someone out, and they went nuts after I put a move
on my man. It was cool. But no one was prepared for the next day. It was
October 26th, in Stockholm. Let me give you a little history on Stockholm,
Sweden. The last time we were in Stockholm, there was a lot of drama.
The first time we went there was in August of 1999 for a promo tour.
During that time, Slim met this young lady, and she was tight. No doubt
she was tight. In fact, all the women I saw there were tight. It was like
they came off an assembly line or something—tall, blond, big boobs, nice
body, and nice personality. And there were some fine black women there,
too. I got a chance to meet the girls from Lou Bega’s group (“Mambo No.
5”) and, my goodness; they were gorgeous, absolutely beautiful. On the
August tour, when we arrived at the hotel, the lobby was swamped with
nothing but girls ranging in age from fourteen to nineteen, all tugging on
our clothes and wanting kisses, hugs, and photos. We loved it because it
was all girls. We had to get help from hotel security because we couldn’t
even make it to the elevator. These girls were young, but were tall and
looked at least five years older than they actually were. The fact that they
were young didn’t matter to Slim. He hooked up with this one young lady
who was tight, named Agnes.

She was young, but Slim didn’t know it at the time. Agnes was
built like a brick house for a white girl. I have to admit, she was also very
smart.This girl had her game down. She had somehow put together a fake
passport. I told her before she talked to Slim I would need to see some ID
because they lock people in jail in foreign countries. Everything looked
legit, but I found out she used one of her friend’s information and took
the picture and hooked up the ID to look real. Apparently, she was able
to get into bars and shit like that. One thing you have to realize is that
in the States eighteen is the legal age, but in Sweden sixteen is the legal
age, and in some places in Europe, fifteen is the legal age. This girl looked
every bit of twenty-two. She had a fucking body! She was hot, and she was
pushing up on Slim pretty tough. Slim was like, “Why don’t you come up
to my room?” and we checked her ID, which said she was nineteen years
old. She was all over him. I left them, and they went up to his room, and
a couple of hours later he came back down. Slim was hype, “Yo, man, that
was the best fuck I ever had in my life. She came like eleven times. ” I said,
“Man, she ain’t come no damn eleven times!” Slim said, “Man, you should
see my sheets, they are soaked! She sucked my dick, we sixty-nined. Man,
she knows how to fuck!” He was totally blown away by this girl, but at the
time he didn’t know her real age—none of us did—she had fooled all of
us. Her game was tight, so tight that Slim wanted to fly her out for the rest
of that tour. However, when we went to get her a ticket, the authorities
discovered that she was underage—only fifteen years old!