Sharing Space (The Complete Series) (38 page)

It felt like the worst. I barely remember my visit with my parents, getting to the airport, or the flight. How had it all gone so wrong so quickly? Of course I knew it wasn’t going to be an easy sell. Chloe was right about that. If I hadn’t been such a coward and just told her what the studio wanted right away, I’d have had more time to deal with the fallout. And maybe I wouldn’t find myself freshly dumped and depressed the day before the biggest day of my career.

I texted Cat to let her know I’d arrived and then I sent a text to Chloe.

We need to talk.
xoxo

Then I took a shower, ordered room service that I barely touched, and fell asleep waiting for her to text me back.

***

I was one of the first actors to arrive at the table read the next morning. We were going to read through the entire script that day. It was my first opportunity to meet the full cast, and I was nervous. Chloe hadn’t written or called, but I had to put that out of my mind for the moment. It was just a table read, but I didn’t want to flub lines and make a bad first impression.

As people started to trickle into the conference room within the HBO offices, my nerves eased. Everyone was cordial and, even though I recognized a few of the actors from major films, there were no egos visible. Everyone came ready to work. George wouldn’t be there for the read, but a few of the producers and the head screenwriter, a recent Golden Globe winner, were.

Tim stood at the head of the table and announced that we were still waiting on one more
actor before we could begin. I took that opportunity to grab a bottle of water from a table of refreshments and then searched for my name on cards that were placed around the large table. I found my name towards the head of the table and noticed Ian had been assigned to the spot on my left. As I settled into my chair, I read the name on the card to my right just as I heard a familiar laugh enter the room.

Kelly Kennedy.

I called Cat the moment we broke for lunch.

“You didn’t tell me Kelly was in this movie.” I tried to keep my voice low to not scare the people in the lobby.

“I didn’t know she was. Is that a problem? I thought you were friends.” Cat sounded confused and annoyed at the same time.

“We were. We are. It’s complicated. I just wish I’d known.”

“You didn’t answer my question. Is it a problem?”

Kelly seemed happy, but surprised, to see me. She’d sent my parents a condolence card after Charlotte died, and we had a quick phone conversation before the funeral. We never talked about her confrontation with Chloe at the Christmas party, and to bring that up now seemed pointless and unprofessional. My past with Kelly wouldn’t get in the way of doing what I needed to do on set. I wouldn’t let it. She was playing Ian’s character’s wife and we only had a few scenes together.

“No, it’s not a problem.”

“Good. Everything else going okay?”

“Yeah. Listen, I gotta get back in there. I’ll talk to you soon.”

It was a lie. I still had an hour before we were going to pick up the read again, but I didn’t want to spend any more time making small talk. Instead, I wanted to figure out how I’d lost my girlfriend and ended up working with my ex-girlfriend in less than forty-eight hours.

***

Filming, interviews, and photo shoots—the next two months of my life were dedicated to those three things. There was very little time to think about how what we were doing would be received, so it was surprising to discover there was so much buzz around the project when it came time to do what’s called soft promotion. We’d had a reporter and photographer from
Entertainment Weekly
visiting the set semi-regularly, working on the premiere feature, but the upcoming sit down on Ellen DeGeneres’s talk show was a shock. The news elicited a rare surge of excitement from my mother, who loved Ellen. As with any time something of significance happened, I resisted the urge to call Chloe. We hadn’t spoken since I’d left and there’d only been one return text.

Ian had done the show several times, Kelly once, and they assured the rest of us that it would be more fun than work. They were right. There were six stools placed where musical guests usually performed, and that was where the interview was conducted. Ellen spent a large portion of time on Ian and Kelly, as they were already household names and the bigger draw, but she was warm and welcoming to all of us, making sure to ask about our previous work. We all had to stick to a script in what we could and couldn’t say about
Backstage Pass
, but it was such a softball interview that wasn’t an issue.

Then Ellen brought up what had most certainly been an issue in my life.

“So, clearly this movie is about a boy band, right? I mean, look at you guys,” Ellen said, and looked to the audience for a reaction to her joke. They obliged with laughter, clapping, and catcalls. “I gotta ask, are you guys single?”

Everyone fell in line and gave the expected answer. Even Ethan, who played the drummer and had a girlfriend he’d been with since high school, said he was single. Then it was my turn.

“What about you, Patrick? You’re a New York City boy, right? Anyone waiting for you back east?”

I thought about the last and only text I’d received from Chloe since leaving.

There’s nothing left to say.

“Nope. Not that I know of.” I gave the required shy smile and wave as the women in the audience responded with clapping and shouts.

“Well, that’s funny because according to this…” Ellen reached under her stool and produced a magazine I hadn’t noticed before. There was a page marked with a sticky note and she flipped right to it. She held up the magazine to the nearest camera and I looked at one of the studio monitors to see what it displayed. “According to this, you and Kelly are an item.”

There was a picture of Kelly and me taken at the
Raven Cosmetics
function. I couldn’t make out all of the text from the screen, but the large print caption read,
Kelly Kennedy’s Hunky Soap Beau.
The studio audience oohed. I could have won an Oscar for keeping the shock off my face. Kelly blushed and flashed that girl-next-door smile that had helped make her famous, the smile that had charmed me out of my pants, literally, many times.

“Oh, Ellen. You know you can’t always believe what you read,” Kelly said coyly. Then she winked at the camera, which said to everyone watching they should definitely believe what they’d read.

“Chloe, are you avoiding me?”

I was two steps from the top of the staircase and five steps from being inside my apartment. I stopped, turned around, and faced Mr. Tucci, who was standing at the bottom of the landing.

“No, I’m not avoiding you, Mr. Tucci.”

I had
totally
been avoiding him.

I took two steps down and rested one hip on the bannister. “I’ve been so busy with work and helping my cousin with her restaurant.”

“Did you not get my notes?”

He’d left three notes on my door, but I was always too exhausted when I got home to do more than ball them up and toss them in the trash. “I did. I’m sorry. So much going on. The lease, right? You want to talk about renewing the lease?”

He threw his hands up in the air. “Of course I want to talk about the lease, girlie. It’s almost up. I need to know if you two are going to renew next month or not.”

It didn’t look like I was going to be able to avoid it any longer. I answered him truthfully. “Mr. Tucci, I don’t know what Patrick is going to do. He’s—”

“In Los Angeles, I know. He’s been sending his payments on time.”

“Just his half, right?”

“Of course, just his half. Look, I don’t usually like to do this, but I like you, Chloe. Would it help if we went month-to-month for six months? Then you could figure out what you want to do.” He tapped his thick fingers on the bannister while he waited for an answer. Saying yes bought me time, so that’s what I did.

“That would be a big help. Thank you.”

“I’ll still need thirty day’s notice if you decide to move, though.”

“You got it.”

Once inside the apartment I kicked my shoes off and stood with my back against the door, taking in the living room. I was positive that Patrick would look for another place when the movie was done. Why would he want to live with the ex-girlfriend who refused to take his calls? Well, back before he’d given up calling. But what if he didn’t? I would have to move. It was easier to stand by my decision when I didn’t have to see him every day. And if he did move, could I live with the memories? It was as if I’d never lived there without him; he was so much a part of every room.

I tossed aside my keys and purse and went to the kitchen for a bottle of wine. I drank a full glass at the kitchen counter before taking the bottle and glass back into the living room. I cracked the windows before sitting on the sofa and propping my feet on the coffee table. It was early August and hot enough to use the air conditioner, but I liked listening to the sounds of the city when I got home from work: couples walking to the café up the block, cars whizzing by, kids being called in for dinner. These were reminders that life goes on even if mine was standing still.

A month ago I was forced to break my work, home, and restaurant schedule and celebrate my birthday with Myra and Crystal. We went to a tapas bar Michael had recommended to Crystal. I sat held hostage between the two of them while they ordered pitchers of margaritas and spicy shrimp dishes. It only took three drinks before we were talking about what they really wanted to discuss.

“I’m not sure why you’re sitting here with your face all frowned up.” Myra put a healthy spoonful of mango salsa on to her plate. “No one told you to dump that man.”

“Uh. You told me to dump that man. Repeatedly.”

“For other reasons. You did it because he was trying to play the game for his hustle.”

I whipped my head around to look at her so fast I nearly sprained my neck. “Excuse you? What happened to not being denied? And having respect for myself?”

“I said that back when I thought you’d come to your senses. You’ve let this go on way too long. It’s been about three months. You’re supposed to be in Los Angeles right now celebrating your birthday with Patrick and George Clooney, letting that man treat you to a Hollywood shopping spree.” She poured another margarita.

I looked to Crystal for rescue. “Can you believe this chick?”

Crystal shrugged. “She’s kinda right, you know.”

“You, too, Crystal? You too?”

“I’m just saying. I can understand why you were upset, but at least he told you what he was going to do and why he was going to do it.”

“Oh, I forgot. You’re all about forgiveness now.” I rolled my eyes.

Crystal balled up a napkin and tossed it at me. “This isn’t about me or Jermaine so don’t even go there.”

I put the napkin on the table and looked down at my lap. “Well, it doesn’t really matter anymore, does it? He went on a TV show and told the world he’s dating Kelly.”

“Uh, far be it from me to defend the ways of white folks,” Myra said, “but he didn’t say that. Some magazine insinuated, and then Skanky Barbie tried to play it cute.”

“He didn’t correct her.” I pouted and watched as Myra refilled my glass.

“Didn’t he already tell you they were willing to lie about their romantic statuses for publicity? What makes you think the Kelly stuff wasn’t a lie as well?” Crystal asked, eyeing me as I took a long sip of my margarita. I licked salt from my lips and turned to answer her.

“I don’t. And it doesn’t matter because
I
pushed
him
away. I don’t have a say in where he landed.”