Shifted By The Winds (42 page)

Louisa watched as a group of horsemen galloped down the road toward them. Her stomach tightened, though she couldn’t have explained why, when they began to slow. They craned their necks to glare in the direction of the school, and Louisa saw several of their eyes widen when they caught sight of her. Her stomach clenched even more when their eyes narrowed into angry glares. She didn’t recognize any of the men, but that didn’t mean they didn’t recognize her. She hated the idea that it bothered her.

“Go inside,” Rose said.

Louisa, ashamed of herself that she wouldn’t stay and stand her ground beside Rose, turned and entered the school. She hurried to a window and peered out as the horsemen pulled to a stop, talking among themselves. Several of them were waving their arms, but she couldn’t make out what they were saying. She didn’t need words, however, to know they were angry.

Rose remained on the porch, her slim body erect as she gazed out at the road. A simple motion of her hand had all the children filing silently into the school. All of them took their seats except Amber and Felicia.

The two little girls slipped out the narrow door built into the back of the school and broke into a run, the woods swallowing them in just seconds. Louisa realized they were running to the plantation for help. The knowledge made her throat go dry. Visions of the school in flames filled her mind, but she pushed them aside. Without knowing how, she was suddenly certain the men were angry because of her. The thought terrified her.

The children were all sitting at their desks. Their eyes were wide with fright, but no one made a sound. One of the older boys stood and moved next to the door leading into the woods, his eyes trained on Rose through one of the windows. Louisa was certain he would help evacuate the children if the men took one step toward the school.

Rose continued to stand proudly, her head held high. Louisa took a deep breath, certain Rose shouldn’t be alone. Humiliation that she was hiding in the school like a coward swept over her like a wave cresting in a storm. She lifted her head in defiance and moved toward the door.

Just before she stepped out onto the porch, the men turned and galloped off. Louisa watched Rose sag against the column and realized how frightened she must have been. She slipped up next to her and laid her hand on her shoulder. “What was that about?” she whispered.

Rose didn’t answer. She glanced toward the children staring out at them and shook her head. “Later,” she whispered back.

Rose took several deep breaths and entered the classroom. “Everything is fine,” she said to her frightened students in a reassuring voice.

“Them the same men who burnt our school?” one little girl called.

“
Are those
the same men who burned our school,” Rose responded.

Louisa was amazed Rose could still think to correct grammar after the fear of the last minutes. She was quite sure she wouldn’t be able to, yet she couldn’t even identify why she had been so frightened in the first place by a group of her own people riding by the school. There had not seemed to be an obvious threat, but she had a quick understanding that Rose, her children, and every innocent looking student in the school, must live with fear all the time.

“
Are those
the same men who burned our school?” the little girl demanded with a quavering voice.

Rose walked over to kneel down in front of her and took the little girl’s hands. “I don’t know, Bonnie,” she said honestly. “But I
do
know nothing is going to happen right now.”

Rose couldn’t possibly know that, but Louisa watched the children gradually relax as they stared at the teacher they trusted. Her respect for Rose jumped by leaps and bounds.

“Why are we hiding in the school?” Jasper asked. “Me and John wanted to play more,” he added, his little face set with petulant defiance.

It was John who answered his question. “It’s okay, Jasper. There be some people in the world that don’t like black people very much.”

Jasper looked confused. “I’m not black.”

John thought about that for a moment. “But being with black people makes you
almost
black,” he explained.

Jasper seemed to accept the answer with no trouble, but the truth of it hit Louisa between the eyes with the same force of the bricks that had crumbled from the wall around her heart and mind. She gasped, stark fear filling her. Suddenly she wanted to grab Jasper and run from the school so fast and far that no one could be a threat to them ever again. She began to tremble when she realized that wasn’t possible. What had she done by coming here today? Had she made herself and her family, including her innocent son, a target?

Rose cast her a sympathetic look and stepped back to the front of the class. “I’m going to end school early today,” she said. “I don’t believe there is any danger, but all of you are far too precious to me to take a chance. You all know how to slip through the woods to get home safely. Stay off the road today and go straight home. If you hear anything, hide in the woods until you know it is safe. We will have school tomorrow.”

Louisa watched as the children nodded solemnly. Their eyes were still fearful, but their faces were set with determination. This was obviously something they had practiced or experienced already. They all lined up at the back door, and then slipped through one at a time. Sibling groups joined together, disappearing into the woods quickly. She watched until the last child, except John and Jasper, disappeared. “They have done this before,” she said as she turned to Rose.

Rose nodded. “There are times it has been necessary. Sometimes I do it just as a drill to make sure they are prepared when there is a need.” She knelt down next to where John and Jasper seemed to be frozen to their desk, both faces a mask of uncertainty and fear. “It’s okay, boys.” She handed both of them a piece of chalk. “Would you like to draw on the board?”

John brightened immediately. “Really, Mama? Can we draw anything?”

Rose nodded. “Anything,” she assured him. “We’re going to wait here until your daddy comes.”

“Daddy is coming?” John asked in a delighted voice. “Promise?”

“I promise,” Rose said.

John nodded, all his fear disappearing at the promise his daddy was on the way. “Come on, Jasper. We can draw anything we want on the board! None of the other kids get to do
that
! We don’t have to be afraid. My
daddy
is coming!” Jasper, heartened by John’s sudden courage and confidence, nodded happily, grabbed the chalk from him and headed for the board. Moments later they were laughing and chatting as they drew pictures of the birds, rocks and trees they had discovered that morning.

Louisa shivered as she looked out the window, praying Moses would suddenly appear. Some part of her understood Rose was afraid to walk back through the woods alone, but she tried to push that aside because it only made her more frightened to imagine what Rose might be attempting to avoid. “Are you afraid all the time?” She hated the fear turning her muscles to jelly, but she didn’t know how to fight it.

Rose looked her in the eyes. “I wouldn’t say I am
afraid
all the time. I would certainly say I am aware every minute of every day that something could happen. I’m not responsible for only myself. I am also responsible for a classroom of children. I can’t ever let my guard down.”

Louisa appreciated that Rose didn’t sugarcoat it. “Was John right? Did I put Jasper and myself in danger by being here today?” Sick fear pulsed through her when Rose hesitated. “Please just tell me the truth.” She didn’t want to hear it, but she knew she must.

“Your family was at risk the moment you decided to stay on Cromwell Plantation,” Rose replied, her voice both direct and sympathetic. “You simply needed a safe place to stay, but I can guarantee you there are people who know you and Perry are living here. In their eyes it means you support what is happening at Cromwell.”

Now was not the time to discuss whether she and Perry supported it or not. “What kind of danger are we in?” Louisa demanded.

Rose shook her head. “I can’t tell you that,” she admitted. “I know Thomas and Abby have guards. So do Jeremy and Marietta.”

“Jeremy is Thomas’ brother, too?” Louisa saw a flash in Rose’s eyes, but she just nodded calmly. 

“Yes.”

“Why do they have guards?” Louisa was afraid to know the answer, but she had to face this squarely if she was to find a way to protect her family.

“Jeremy has been beaten badly by men who don’t like his support of blacks. Abby has been threatened, and all of them have received threats in the mail.”

“And Marietta?”

Rose sighed. “The same people who hate black teachers seem to hate white ones even more when they come down here to teach the blacks. They see it as a betrayal of their race.”

“That’s ridiculous,” Louisa snorted. She wasn’t sure when she had decided she felt that way, but it didn’t really matter. She took deep breaths to steady her nerves. “Do you live like this all the time?”

Rose raised a brow. “If you mean do I live with the knowledge that my family is in danger every day, yes. But I’ve lived that way all my life,” she said. “I lived knowing I could be beaten for learning to read. I knew I could be sold away from my mama. I lived knowing that Carrie would always be considered a better person than me simply because of her skin color.” She took a deep breath. “I hoped the end of slavery would mean I could quit being afraid, but in some ways it is worse. When I was a slave, I only worried about what my master or overseer might do to me. Now I have to watch for every white person who is angry because I’m free.” Her eyes darkened with grief. “I feel safe on Cromwell most of the time, but I realize trouble is always out there. Our decision to run Cromwell the way we do has only made us more of a target.”

Louisa stopped breathing when she had sudden and illuminating vision of what Rose was describing. “I never understood,” she said, a dark anguish burying her fear as she caught a glimpse of Rose’s life, and with it, the life of the millions of slaves who were now free.

Rose took her hand. “I am glad you understand, but I want to emphasize that you are in danger, Louisa. I wouldn’t have allowed you to come today if I had thought of the possible consequences. I’m sorry.”

Louisa gripped her hand and tried to steady her nerves. “Who were those men?” she asked.

“I don’t know,” Rose admitted. “I can usually recognize a few of them, but these were men I had never seen before.”

Louisa watched her carefully. “And that worries you,” she observed.

Rose shrugged, but she couldn’t hide the deep concern in her eyes. “They may not be from around here,” she said.

“Which means…?” Louisa pressed, trying to hide her impatience.

“I don’t know for certain,” Rose replied, “but they could be vigilantes.” Her voice faltered on the last words.

“Vigilantes?”  Louisa’s eyes narrowed.  “I think I have heard Perry mention something about them, but I also suspect he has been trying to protect me by hiding knowledge of who they are.”

“Most of them are Confederate soldiers who still believe they have a war to fight,” Rose revealed. “It seems they have decided to do it by fighting against the things they believe are changing the South from the way it used to be.”

“Meaning blacks and the whites who don’t believe the way they do?” Louisa knew the answer even before she heard it, but speaking the words was giving her a chance to process them.

“Yes.”

Louisa turned and stared out the window, relieved when the road remained empty. Her ears strained for the sound of approaching horses, but she heard only the laughter of two small boys. “When is Moses coming?” She was finding it difficult to stay calm. “Why don’t we go home through the woods?”

Rose shook her head. “I’m not sure that is a good idea.”

“Because you’re afraid they are waiting in the woods for us?” Louisa demanded as her throat tightened even more. She fought to keep her voice low so that she didn’t scare the boys.

Rose blinked and sighed. “I just don’t know, Louisa. If it was just me, I would walk home. I’m not willing to put you, John and Jasper at risk.”

“And you believe we’re safer here?”

Rose shook her head again. “I just don’t know,” she admitted, her face crumpling for a moment before she composed it again. “I hate being afraid,” she said, her voice gruff with anger. “I am so
sick
of being afraid!” she whispered, raw fear shining from her eyes for the first time.

Louisa had a sudden realization. “You’re afraid something has happened to Felicia and Amber because it’s taking so long.”

Rose’s shoulders sagged as she stared out the window, but she remained silent.