So. Long.: Bad Boy Next Door (57 page)

“I’m so sorry to hear about your mom. I can’t imagine what
would happen to Cassie if I die. You were very lucky to have the Jennings take
you in.”

“Yes, I really was. They’ve been so good to me. I can’t
imagine life without them.” Or Danny.

I point to Cassie. “Has it been hard? You know, without
help?”

“Well, I’m not sure being a mother, single or not, is ever
easy. But I wouldn’t trade one second for the alternative. So, with help or
not, I’m glad I have Cass. She’s my heart. My smile at the end of a long day.
My world.”

“So you wouldn’t do it differently? You don’t wish you’d
have chosen—”

“A different path? Another guy?” She finishes for me.

I shrug. “Yeah.”

“No. Not at all.” She shakes her head. “I wouldn’t have
Cassie if I had. And I wouldn’t be the me I am today if I’d done that. Every
experience makes us the person we are in this moment. Good ones. Bad ones. All
of them. And I like me. No, I love me. There aren’t a lot of people who can say
that.”

Her words swarm my brain. I search for a reply, but come up
empty. Stunned maybe. I don’t even know.

Samantha leans out and touches my upper arm. “Look, I know
it’s got to be hard growing up with no dad. And I wish he’d have stuck around
to see Cass grow. But he’s the one missing out. And you? He’s missed out on
you, too.”

I swipe a knuckle under my eye and blink back the rest of
the tears threatening to undo me in front of these strangers who are the only
family I have left.

Sam catches an errant tear with the back of her hand. “Look
how beautiful you are, and how sweet. You’ve grown into a wonderful young woman
in spite of your dad. Maybe even because of him. Who knows how you’d have been
different if he’d have been there? I can’t wait to see how Cassie will turn
out.”

I push up from the floor and hug Cassie goodbye. She’s still
half-glued to the television, but she does manage to smile up at me and squeeze
my legs one last time before I head to the door.

On the way home, my mind replays what Sam said about how I
turned out all right, even without my dad.

Do I like me?

Yeah. I do.

If I choose to have this baby, will she like herself? Will
she grow up all right if Danny takes off?

I push through the front door of the shelter. Lights flash.
I put my hands up, shielding my eyes.

What on Earth?

The pine oil scent that usually dominates the halls mingles
with an overly strong floral perfume.

A woman shoves a microphone into my face. “Ms. Clark? Can
you tell us your side of the story?”

I stop, pulling back. “What?”

A photographer kneels in front of me, snapping photos at
Olympic speed. Another guy adjusts a setting on his shouldered camera. Camera?
Great. Like I haven’t had enough of those lately.

The petite woman swipes a swath of hair from in front of her
face. “Your side of the story? Creeper Gate?”

I step back. “Creeper Gate? Who
are
you?”

She tosses a disgusted look to her cameraman. “She doesn’t
know who I am. Kids these days; they don’t know anything.”

I shake my head and push between them. “No comment.”

In Cindy’s office, I lean against the inside of the door.
“There’s a news crew in the hallway.”

Cindy spins in her chair. “What?”

I hook my thumb to point over my shoulder. “They accosted me
just inside the door, asking me about something called
Creeper Gate
.”

She shoos me out of her way. I shut the door behind her, but
her voice comes through loud and clear. “You cannot be in here. I’ll call the
police if you don’t leave these premises immediately.”

When she returns she grabs the remote and turns on the small
flat screen hanging above the file cabinet. “Hey, before I forget, Danny’s
called, asking for you, no less than ten times today. And I know what this
Creeper
Gate
is about. There’s been an—
incident
, apparently. I’ll have a
meeting later this afternoon to inform everyone of what procedures they need to
take, if any. I’m waiting for the legal department to get back to me.”

The legal department? I type CREEPER GATE into the browser
on my phone.

My stomach curdles.

A photo of David with a story about how he
allegedly
videotaped women in the bathrooms at his ministry headquarters, and—“Oh my
gosh. It happened here too?”

Cindy’s shoulders droop. The crease between her brows
deepens. “I don’t know. It’s horrible and I’ve been putting out fires all day.”

Then the facts catch up with me.

Holy shit balls.

My skin crawls as my mind flashes over the things I’ve done
in what I thought was the privacy of my own space. And to have Danny and
Rachel’s dad watching everything.

Oh Lord.

Danny and me—the sex. Did Dave watch
that
too? My
mouth sours and the back of my throat burns with the thought.

I turn and rush down the hall toward the exit. Before I go
through it, I stop. Crap. They’re probably out there, waiting for me. Or maybe
for Danny.

I should warn him.

I head to the bathroom as I tap the screen to make the call.

It rings once. “Mo?”

“Yeah.” I hit the lock on the door handle.

“Thank God. I’ve been trying to reach you.”

“I know. Look, I just called to tell you—”

“Oh no; they’ve found you, too.”

“At the shelter. Cindy chased them back outside.”

“I’ll come get you. Stay put. Where are you?”

The warmth in my heart wars with the cold in my gut. No. I
can’t let him near me. I have too much to work through. “No. I’ll be fine.
Thanks.”

“Are you sure? Can we meet somewhere later? Talk?”

I chew my thumbnail.
Yes
dangles from the tip of my
tongue.

“Please, Mo, I need to see you.”

“That’s not a good idea. I have a lot to think about.”

“Are you okay? How do you feel? You haven’t done anything,
have you?”

“Anything?”

“You know, about the baby—you haven’t decided yet, have
you?”

I close my eyes and push my fingers through my hair. “No,
not yet.”

A big sigh comes through the receiver. “Good. Please, before
you do anything, can we talk?”

I cover my mouth and pull the phone away. Danny’s face
smiles up at me—the selfie he took a week or so ago and set as his image in my
contacts list.

Those dimples.

My ribs clamp tight around my lungs. “Look, I’ve got to go.”

I wash my hands and head down the hall to the childcare
room. There are seven babies and toddlers all born to women who made the wrong
choices. Choice of men. Choice of education. Choice of location. Some are at
fault, some not. Either way, these babies are here, being raised in a shelter.

I place my hand over my womb. My decisions will affect the
life growing inside me. This baby.

FOURTEEN

By the time I drag in at Slade’s, I’m exhausted. All I want
is a hot shower. And my pillow is calling.

What I get is Danny sitting where I usually sleep.

I straighten my top and shoot a death glare at Slade.

He rubs his thighs and stands. “Well—I’ll let you two talk.”

Slade lets himself out. His old truck roars to life while
Danny’s eyes hold mine.

I swallow the lump trying to form in my throat. “Look,
Danny—”

He pushes up from the sofa. “Please. I had to see you…make
sure you’re all right. Let’s just talk for a few minutes.”

I wave a hand over myself. “Okay, you’ve seen. I’m fine. Now
you can go. I’m not ready to talk.”

He shuffles his feet, head down. “I’m sorry about what my
dad did. I wouldn’t blame you if you wanted to cut us all off. But I hope you
won’t. Rachel will be so hurt.”

Rachel?

My shoulders slump. Oh, Rachel.

I am the most horrible friend. “I don’t want to cut Rachel
or your mom off—or even you. You guys are the closest thing I have to family.
That’s why it hurts so bad to know what he did.”

Danny steps around the low table and takes my hand. Tingles
run from his fingers straight to my heart. Every thought I have flees.

I let out a deep breath; with the air goes my resolve.

I’m a sad sack. He touches me and I lose my freaking mind.

He tugs me toward the couch. “Please, sit with me.”

He falls into the lumpy cushions and pulls me into his lap.
I try to move, but he holds fast, his eyes boring into mine.

Who am I kidding? I don’t really want to get away from him.
He knows it. I know it. So I let myself relax into his chest and settle against
his warmth, his strength. He slides his arms around me, pulling me tighter into
him, kissing my shoulder.

I pull my phone from my back pocket. “Rach hasn’t called.
Does she know?”

He leans back and pushes his hands over his face and through
his sun-bleached hair. “Yeah. I got a hold of her yesterday. She’ll be flying
in tomorrow.”

I catch my breath and let it out slowly, allowing it to fill
my cheeks before the air escapes. “Is she okay?”

“She’s not good. I think this is pretty tough for her. She’s
always kind of put Dad up on some sort of pedestal.”

My stomach churns just thinking about the things Dave
probably saw. I heave a sigh.

Danny brushes the hair out of my face. “How are
you
doing? I hoped to spare you from this. I thought I’d found all the cameras. I
told him—”

My brain stumbles over his words. I jump up and back around
the low table. His brow wrinkles, and he opens his mouth like he’s going to say
something.

Closing my eyes, I turn away and hold up my hand. “Wait.
Stop. You
knew
he did this before I found that stupid camera in the
shell? And you didn’t tell me?”

“I didn’t want you to feel violated.”

My mind fries in my skull. “
You
didn’t want?
You
?
What about me?”

He stands and grabs at my hand, but I snatch it away.

“God, Danny. That’s not something you keep from someone. I
had a right to know.”

He throws his hands in the air. “Well, pardon fucking me for
trying to protect you.”

I grind my teeth. My words burst from my mouth in a rush.
“Maybe I don’t need you to protect me. Maybe I just need you to know I’m
capable of handling my own shit life. I can deal, Danny. I’m not going to fall
apart. I’m not going to crumble. I’m not going to—I don’t know—whatever it was
you thought I’d do.”

He pulls me against his hard chest, whispering, “I know you
won’t crumble or fall apart. I’ll always know that, but that doesn’t mean I
won’t always want to shield you from a world too imperfect for you. As the man
who loves you, it’s my job to protect you.”

His breath catches and his voice lowers. “And I—failed.”

The break before that last word slays the last of my anger.
I lean into him. His citrus scent brings back a thousand memories of his hands
on me—of him holding me safe in his embrace.

He lays kisses along the curve of my shoulder. With his
mouth still pressed against the skin left bare by the straps on my sundress, he
says, “I meant what I said, Mo.”

A little ball of hope grows in my stomach, trying to push
out the uncertainty lurking there. “Which thing did you say?”

“I love you. And I want you. God, do I want you.”

His erection firm against my stomach confirms that last
part.

Somehow, even with the turmoil in my heart, and tough
decisions hanging over my head, knowing what I do to him, physically, gives me
a sense of power. Pressing against him, I run my hand up his shirt and around
his neck. My fingers push through the hair at his nape.

Maybe I can just let this play out? See where it goes?
Perhaps Danny
will
stick around.

Or maybe I just want to feel him inside me again. Let him
take me to that place where I can fully let go and lose myself in him. Is it
possible for me to enjoy this relationship while it lasts, even knowing it
probably won’t be long-term?

Danny brushes his mouth across mine. His tongue runs along
my bottom lip. I open to him. He backs us around to the sofa again as his hand
smoothes up my spine. We fall together onto the tweed fabric.

He lays over me as his hand slips under the hem of my dress,
over my knee, and up my thigh. His lips finds mine, exploring, probing, nipping
as though he’s never going to get to kiss me again—like he’s desperate.

He moves to my neck, his fingers inching closer to my
throbbing center. I lick my lips and suck in a deep breath. Do I let this go
on?

What will it mean to us?

Does it change anything for me?

For him?

Somewhere, deep inside, I want it to. Even if just for the
time I have now, this moment of bliss before my world changes forever.

I let my palms glide over his muscles, until I find the
bottom of his shirt. I tug on it.

He pulls back, his glass-green eyes glinting with—hope?
Anticipation?

Then he yanks his shirt over his head. He dives back to me,
taking my bottom lip between his as he starts again, kissing, stroking—
loving
me into oblivion.

When he moves lower, sliding my straps over my shoulders, he
whispers, “This is okay?”

I close my eyes. A knot of fear sinks into my soul, but is
enveloped in a shroud of my own hope, covering it long enough for me to give in
to my desire.

I nod.

Danny lets out a breath as though he’s been holding it,
waiting for my answer. “I love you, Sweets.”

He finds my folds. His touch feathers them until I open my
legs wider. Whiskers skim the tops of my breasts as he uses his chin to push
the top of my dress down. He slips the tips of his fingers between my pussy
lips. Warmth flows to my entrance.

His mouth finds my nipple, and he sucks. The pull reaches
all the way to my center, releasing another wave of wetness. He laves attention
on my breasts, and then moves further south.

When he gets to my belly, he kisses it gently just under my
navel. He lays his cheek there for a moment, murmuring something I can’t quite
hear.

He continues toward my pussy, his fingers already sliding through
the moisture there, building pressure, tightening the coil deep inside. He
presses my clit, pushing it in small circles. My breath hitches and I tilt my
hips toward him.

Lifting my skirt, he ducks under it, his palms on my thighs
as he spreads them. His thumbs dip into my opening, one at a time. Then his hot
breath warms my folds just before his hotter tongue tickles my nub. His taste
buds create just the right amount of friction to cause my hips to buck out of
control.

I grab the edges of my skirt as my heart rate goes up,
making the pulse beneath his mouth increase. When he licks from the tight
little hole below my slit to my clit, tingles flow in all directions. I moan.

He answers with a groan and dips two fingers deep inside,
hitting that spot that makes me pump against his hand. He sucks my bud and
slides one finger from my entrance down to that tight place, pushing against it
until I pull my leg up, opening to him as much as I can.

Danny lets out a low growl and grabs my ass cheeks, tilting
me up. He kisses that puckered spot, sliding his tongue against it and then
back up my slit. He moves so his fingers still hold me up, but his thumbs each
find a hole. One slides into my opening, as he suckles my clit. Then the
pressure at that smaller place, that
tighter
place, increases until he
breaches.

I clench tight around him. So full, so… oh my god. And he
moves, gently. Sliding into both places with his thumbs, while he makes love to
my clit with his mouth. Sucking, flicking, licking. All the while, my body
coils tighter, getting wetter.

I grab the arm of the sofa above my head as the tingles from
that puckered place spread through me, and every muscle in my lower body
tightens around Danny. I pulse and throb as wave after wave of my orgasm washes
over me.

He pulls away and kisses each of my ass cheeks. Then he
breathes over my folds and lays a soft kiss on my pussy, before licking up the
center between my labia. “You taste incredible, Sweets. Fucking amazing.”

My chest still heaves as he stands and unbuttons his pants
and lets them fall to the floor. His cock reaches out to me. I take hold,
letting my hand slide to the base, so smooth and hard.

I rise up on one arm, my dress hiked around my waist and
pushed down below my naked breasts. The bead of moisture at the end of his dick
glistens in the light. I lick it off with a swipe of the flat of my tongue.
Danny’s knees bend just a bit and he lets out a small moan.

Pulling him closer, I take him in my mouth as I palm his
balls. I pull away, but he stops me before I suck him in again.

“No. I want to sink into your pussy. I want to be inside
you, and I want to kiss your sweet mouth as we come together.”

He grabs my dress and pulls it down my legs, dropping it
into a puddle over his discarded jeans. His sculpted body hovers over mine for
only a moment. I wrap him with my legs and pull him to me.

As he rolls his hips and the head of his erection slips into
my entrance, Danny’s gaze holds mine. He licks his lips. “I love you, Mona
Lisa.”

I grip his waist as he pulls out.

He hovers above me, still staring into my eyes. I lift to
meet him again, but he pulls back further. “Tell me you love me too.”

The answer wants so badly to spill from my lips, but the
fear in my heart freezes the words in place. So I spit out the only thing I
can. “Just make love to me, Danny.”

A moment of pain flashes through his eyes. Pain? But it’s
gone so fast I’m not even sure I saw it. He slips back inside and buries his
face in the curve of my neck, whispering, “Then I’ll love you enough for both
of us.”

Danny picks up the pace. My heart hammers with his thrusts.
Again, the pressure builds.

I grab his ass. Each time he pulls almost out, I yank him
back. I arch against him as he pumps his cock deep inside. Sweat sheens on his
forehead, and my own dampens the hair at my temples.

He slams against me, his balls slapping the seam of my ass.
He’s poised over me. His eyes search mine. I pant as we meet with each plunge
of his hips between my thighs. My nails dig into his back.

I ride the crest and my body tightens. His hardens even
more, reaching deeper than ever. He lowers himself to his elbows, his mouth
finding mine as he thrusts harder and faster. Finally, when I can’t hold back,
the orgasm crashes over me.

My grip tightens on Danny. He pumps into my pussy as it
clenches his dick, spasming around his heated length.

Finally, he arches his back, pushing his chest against mine
while his cock impales me again. This time, he stays deep within my body,
pulsing inside. “God, Mona.”