Authors: annie nadine
Tags: #good vs evil, #betrayal anger and bitterness revenge, #triangle love story, #struggle encouragement success overcoming conquering true vine publishing timothy bond love forgiveness joy happiness strength
“
Annie,” he whispered her name and it felt like a
caress.
“
Yes?” She whispered back. Her eyes felt swollen and
her nose was blocked. She thought if she cried anymore her head
might fall off.
“
How are you feeling?” He asked as he gently bushed her
hair away from her face.
“
As if my nose has had a pear thrust up it.” She
laughed a little but there was no humour in it. Through the
night-darkened room she heard a small laugh. “Was that a laugh?”
She asked him.
“
Your use of words is remarkable,” he explained. She
smiled and it made her face feel stretched tight. There was silence
for a time but it wasn’t unpleasant, it was comfortable.
“
I did not think he would walk out of my life forever.”
She opened up to him. This could come back to bite her but she
ignored the worry. “He has been my best friend for so long and now
he cannot stand the sight of me.”
“
I think the problem is more so that he
can
stand the sight of you, very much,” Baden half
joked.
“
You know what I am saying.” She still smiled at his
effort to make her feel better.
“
I do. It is hard to be in love with someone when they
do not want you back,” Baden said perceptively.
“
Is there a hint of love lost I hear in your voice?”
Even with how upset she was she still checked to see if he had
feelings for someone. She felt puerile because of it. Baden paused
for a moment.
“
I am not sure how to respond,” he said avoiding having
to answer.
“
Is there someone that loves you?” She asked finding it
strange that he seemed confused about it.
“
I think there might be.” He sounded unsure of
himself.
“
And do you love them?” Her question was met with
silence. After a long time she gave up on getting an answer from
him and thought it best not to push him.
“
It has been so long since I have felt like me. How can
I know?” His question surprised her.
“
How do you know if you are in love?” She clarified
unnecessarily to give herself more time to think of an
answer.
“
Yes,” he said quickly. How would she know? She had
known of Baden for only a short time and she felt towards him
something that she had never felt for anyone but was it love? She
had never been one to obsess over men or go from one love to the
next, so what made him so different to every other man she
knew?
“
I assume you just know,” she said, guessing the
answer. She really had no idea what to say.
“
Are you in love?” He asked almost shyly. Great, he had
to ask her that didn’t he? What if she said yes, would he guess it
was him? And if he guessed then what would he think? He is unsure
if he is in love but if he is, it most probably wasn’t with
her.
“
I…” What was she meant to say? Why had she started
speaking? Now she would have to say something else. Why was it so
dark? If she could only see his face, maybe it would help. Or maybe
it would make it worse. “I think there may be…I do not know.” She
gave up. He could feel the confusion in her soul.
“
What of Micah?” He asked. He was sure she didn’t love
him but there might be something.
“
I can honestly say that he has never been more than a
friend in my heart.” She was surprised how much better she felt
with Baden near. Even hearing Micah’s name didn’t restart the
tears.
“
And Eli?” Now this was where Baden was paying close
attention. Annie stopped and thought about what he was asking. He
could feel her soul stir with Eli’s name and it caused him to feel
uncomfortable.
“
Am I in love with Eli? I hardly know him,” she
answered.
“
Do you think time is a factor in falling in love?” He
asked quickly after her response.
“
No,” she said with him in mind.
“
Is there a reason you brought that up as a point or
was it to avoid having to answer?” His words sounded very guarded.
What was he even doing? Why was he even here? These questions and
more played around inside his mind.
“
No. I do not love him,” she said outright. But he
could feel the uncertainty in her soul.
“
But you could love him more so than Micah?” Annie
started to feel as if she was being interrogated.
“
Tell me, who do
you
think you may be
in love with?” Annie asked a little frustrated.
“
I…am not in love. I have just decided,” he proclaimed.
She couldn’t help but feel disappointed by his words.
“
Oh,” she said quietly.
“
Would you ever consider loving Eli?” He pushed the
matter. The fact that he asked again after she had already answered
annoyed her. If he didn’t love anyone, and especially not her, then
why did he keep asking who she was in love with?
“
I cannot say I have given it much thought,” she said a
little tersely.
“
Consider it now,” he urged. She felt so irritated that
she lost her patience with him.
“
Well, he is kind and thoughtful. He took me in when I
had nowhere to go. I could possibly think of worse men to share my
life with.” Then she remembered Eli’s life expectancy in comparison
to hers and it put a damper on her reasoning. Then the biggest
decider came to mind, Eli wasn’t Baden. “But there are reasons I
would not choose him,” she finished weakly, losing her
steam.
“
It seems you have put more thought into it than you
claim.” Baden sounded cold. Annie pushed herself up on her arm and
stared down at where she thought he was, it was hard to see through
the dark.
“
You have forced me into an answer and now I am to
blame?” She couldn’t believe it. Before he could respond there was
a soft knock at the door. She froze, hoping whoever it was would go
away.
“
Annie, are you awake?” They heard Eli’s voice call
through the door. She moved off the bed as best she could in the
dark.
“
You need to hide,” she whispered frantically to Baden.
He remained silent. “Baden?” She whispered again when he didn’t
respond.
Assuming that
he had hidden, she walked over to the door. Before she opened it
she felt what she was wearing to make sure she was covered. When
she remembered she was still wearing her day dress she opened the
door to find Eli in the hallway with a small lamp. He came in and
closed the door. Subtly she checked the room to see if she could
spot Baden but she didn’t get much time before Eli
spoke.
“
Sorry to disturb you. I just arrived home and Garrick
informed me of…” He opted not to rehash what had happened with
Micah. “I was passing to my room and I thought I heard you
speaking.” He looked around the room and she panicked a
little.
“
I…I was just talking in my sleep. I do that when I am
upset,” she lied hurriedly to distract him. He placed the lamp down
on the nearest table and came back to her.
“
I am sorry, Annie.” Before she could do anything he
pulled her into an embrace. She hesitated at first but let herself
hug him back. It felt nice that he cared about her and that he
wasn’t afraid to show it. “It hurts to lose someone,” he said
empathetically. She looked over his shoulder and saw the window
open. Her heart sank because it meant that Baden had left and she
didn’t know when or if he would be back. Eli pulled away and looked
at her.
“
Annie, you are freezing,” he said concerned. He ran
his hands along her arms to try and warm her. He looked around for
a rug but then noticed the window was open. “Why on earth is your
window open?” He asked as he walked over and closed it.
“
It must have been open during the day but I fell
asleep in the afternoon and have not been up since.” She wasn’t
sure if that was a lie or not because it may have been the case.
Eli latched the window closed and drew the curtains. He walked back
over, picked up the lamp and took her hand.
“
You should get some rest. It is late and if you so
desired we may still start your lessons tomorrow,” he said trying
to cheer her. Casually letting go of his hand, she climbed into bed
and let herself slip under the covers. She ignored the fact that
she wasn’t dressed for bed, as long as it got Eli out of her room
quicker. Maybe then Baden would come back. The sheets felt warm
where Baden had been laying and it made her feel a little
sad.
Eli took a
seat next to her and placed the lamp down
. It made her heart unexpectedly beat a little faster
and she started to fiddle with the sheets, she didn’t want to risk
it getting out of control like it had before. In the soft glow of
the light he thought she looked quite lovely and had to hold
himself back from kissing her.
“
Yes. I think having our first lesson would be the best
thing to take my mind off today,” she said trying not to think of
Micah or Baden. Eli reached out and gently touched her face to
comfort her.
“
Once he has had time to think he may realise what he
has lost,” Eli consoled. Tears started to well in her eyes so he
leaned down and kissed her cheek, dangerously close to her lips.
She sucked in a breath, waiting for it to be over. What if Baden
was still in the room, hiding? When Eli pulled away he kept his
face close to hers and she looked up at him wide eyed with fear.
Fear that Baden might have seen that but also that somewhere inside
of her felt warm from Eli’s touch.
“
Thank you,” she said trying to break the
tension.
“
Sleep well, Annie.” When he said her name he looked
down to her lips. She half smiled, positioning them awkwardly to
deter his thoughts. The thoughts that were so obviously clear on
his face. Why couldn’t Baden look at her that way?
“
I will find you after I have eaten and then we can
start the lesson,” she said referring to their plans for tomorrow.
He pulled away from her and took the lamp from the bedside
table.
“
Whatever pleases you best,” he said as he stood to
leave. She gave him a small smile before he left and closed the
door.
Her room was
again shrouded in darkness but she still made her way to the door
and locked it, resting her head against it in relief that he was
finally gone. She didn’t know why but she had the potential to get
carried away with Eli.
As she turned
to go back to bed there was a soft noise and then someone was in
front of her. She was pinned with her back against the door and
someone close to her body. Before she could be alarmed she felt his
warm breath and his sweet smell. It was Baden.
“
He loves you,” Baden said of Eli. Annie thought of
rebuking him but she decided not to. If she was honest with herself
she already knew it was true, she just wasn’t sure how she felt
about it. Baden’s face was close to hers, so close she could feel
his breath on her lips. He leaned his arms on the door, either side
of her face and pushed himself against her body even
further.
“
There is something in me that feels inclined to agree
with you,” she said breathlessly.
“
I do not want you to love him,” he said bringing his
lips even closer to hers. She let out a shuddering breath caused by
his closeness.
“
Why?” Is the only word she could manage but it came
out as a sound rather than an actual word. Baden slid one of his
arms around her waist and pulled her even closer.
“
Because I want you to love me.” As he whispered the
words his breath blew into her mouth and it felt like it filled
every part of her that was empty. She couldn’t help but lean in to
kiss him but suddenly she was left alone in the dark room. She felt
a cool breeze where the window stood open and this time she knew he
was gone.
Filled with
disappointment, Annie slowly made her way over, closed the window
and went to bed. She couldn’t even be bothered getting dressed,
this day had dragged on too long and it was catching up with
her.
Part of her
was euphoric that Baden wanted her to love him but then she
realised he hadn’t said
he
loved
her
. Then he just left when she was about to kiss him. Doubt
filled her as she began to think on it more. It felt like he wanted
her as a prize of some kind. Everything he did seemed to be looking
more and more selfish. Soon she fell into a restless sleep, all the
while thinking of Baden.