Soulsearch (Teen Paranormal Romance Series) (The Soulmate Series: Teen Paranormal Romance Book 2) (17 page)

Zach had imagined lots of different responses to his revelation, but this stoicism was not one of them.
 
He expected her to think he was crazy and throw him out on his ear or know exactly what he was talking about and embrace him like a long lost son.
 
When she did neither, he was at a loss for what to do next.
 
He decided he might as well finish the story.

“My mother was in the clinic for a check-up the day you had your first abortion.
 
She was pregnant with me.
 
I believe the soul of your aborted child entered my body that day and has been living inside me for 17 years.
 
His name is Cody and he’s been eager to meet you.”

Jessica finally broke her silence with a strangled gasp.
 
“Wha…Who….How….?”
 
She clearly had no idea how to respond to this information.
 
Finally she settled on her most pressing question.
 
“How can you possibly know this?” She whispered, her golden eyes clouded over with incomprehension.

“I thought I was crazy for a long time, but then I met this girl and found out she had a…companion, too.
 
Her mother was at the clinic the same day you had your second abortion.
 
We thought maybe you would be able to explain it to us, but it doesn’t seem like you know what I’m talking about.”

“I’ve never told anyone about my abortions — no one.
 
How did you know?” Jessica asked, still trying to understand how this strange boy found his way to her.

Zach dropped his head again, embarrassed.
 
“I’m sorry we invaded your privacy, but we had to know!
 
My friends — they snuck into the clinic to look at the old records.
 
It led them to you.
 
You actually met them last week.
 
They came here pretending to be asking questions for a school project.”

Jessica’s eyes popped open in recognition.
 
“Yes!
 
Those kids!
 
The questions they asked were so strange.”

“Rachel, the blonde girl, is the one who’s like me.
 
Her companion’s name is Rider.”

“But, the boy who was with her was named Rider, I thought,” Jessica wrinkled her brow in confusion.

“Yeah, it’s…kinda complicated,” Zach responded, wrinkling his nose.
 
“Rider managed to jump bodies a few months ago, so now he’s in a body that used to belong to a boy named Cameron, but he died, so now it’s just Rider.”

Jessica shook her head in a daze.
 
“This makes no sense.
 
How can any of this be possible?”

“I have no idea.” Zach shrugged.
 
“I was really hoping you knew the answers.
 
Like, you had some special powers or something.
 
You’ve never experienced anything like this before?”

“Uh, no.
 
My life has been totally ordinary up until this very moment.
 
I’m really having trouble wrapping my head around all this,” Jessica exclaimed, tossing her long dark hair behind her shoulder in frustration.
 
“You’re telling me that the soul of my son lives inside your body?
 
You realize how insane that sounds?”

“I know, it’s…unbelievable.
 
But you have to believe me!
 
This isn’t some scam trying to get something from you.
 
All we want is some information.
 
Cody and I, well, life together hasn’t always been easy.
 
We deserve to know the truth, to understand why we are the way we are.”

Jessica’s eyes narrowed as she stared at the boy in front of her.
 
He looked like any other teenager wearing faded jeans and a Purdue tee shirt, but his young face was twisted into a vortex of emotion too deep for his years.
 
She saw pain and fear, anticipation and hope all playing across his innocent face.
 
As she stared, his eyes took on a vacant look and his expression changed to that of someone listening intently to a conversation, but no one was talking.
 
He nodded slightly before refocusing his eyes on Jessica’s.

“Did you just…talk to him?” she asked.

“Uh, yeah,” Zach dropped his head like a guilty child caught by his mother.
 
H stared up at her, trying to decide what she was thinking, but her expression was blank.

“So, can he hear me, see me?” Jessica asked, gradually suspending her disbelief.
 
She didn’t know why she believed this outrageous story told by this enigmatic boy, but somehow she did.

“Yeah, totally,” Zach explained.
 
“He has his own thoughts and feelings, just like a normal person.
 
He can even control my body if he tries hard enough.”

“And the other boy, Rider?”

“Yeah, his story is amazing.
 
All these years he was with Rachel, and then she almost died in an accident and she thought he died too, but instead he just jumped to another body.
 
They’re totally in love with each other.
 
It’s pretty awesome.
 
Rider has become a really good friend to me.”

“I don’t understand why I believe you, but I think I do,” Jessica admitted, staring deeply into Zach’s eyes, looking for truth.
 
“But, I’m nobody special.
 
I can’t jump bodies, for heaven’s sake!
 
How is it possible that my children can?”

“Ma’am, if you don’t mind me asking, did your babies have the same father?”

Jessica gaped at him as the realization dawned.
 
“Michael!
 
You think this has something to do with him?!”
 
Zach shrugged.
 
The assumption went without saying.

“Maybe we could talk to him about it.
 
Do you…still know him?” Zach asked gingerly.

Jessica nodded slowly.
 
“He still comes around sometimes.
 
We’ve never really had a normal relationship.
 
I think he loves me, but it’s like he has a whole other life he won’t let me into.”
 
Jessica gasped as she suddenly realized the implications.

“Oh my God!
 
What if it’s true?!
 
What if he knows what all this is about?!
 
But even he doesn’t know about the babies!”

Zach’s eyes bulged.
 
“You mean you never told him you aborted his babies?”

Jessica hung her head and covered her face in shame.
 
“No, I didn’t.
 
I had my reasons.
 
They seemed good at the time.
 
I’ve always regretted it — always.
 
It’s just something I have to live with.
 
I didn’t think telling him would help matters.”

“Ma’am…”

“Please, call me Jessica.
 
You said your name was Zach?”
 

He nodded.
 
“Jessica, where is Michael now?
 
Can we talk to him?
 
I have to know…”

Jessica nodded.
 
“I can call him.
 
I think I have to.
 
This is too much to deal with alone.
 
Come inside, Zach,” Jessica suggested, pulling herself up from the stairs.
 
The two entered the dark bungalow, a sharp contrast to the bright sunshine outside.
 
It felt like a metaphor for her life; she had been in the dark for a long time and was just now glimpsing a ray of truth.
 
She turned on all the lights and led Zach to the living room where her phone lay on the couch.
 
With a deep breath she picked it up and dialed Michael’s number.
 
She never called him, never felt like it was her place.
 
He came to her when he wanted her, otherwise they lived separate lives.

Jessica sighed in disappointment or relief, she wasn’t sure, as the call went to voicemail, and she left a vague but urgent message. “Michael, it’s Jessica.
 
Please call me, it’s important,” she said, then ended the call.
 
“I don’t know when I’ll hear from him; I don’t see him that often,” Jessica explained.
 
“Give me your number so I can call you when I do.”
 
Zach and Jessica traded phone numbers — the mundane task so strangely normal in comparison with the mood.

“My friend, Rider, your son, would you like to meet him?
 
I mean, now that you know who he is?” Zach asked.

Jessica nodded.
 
This was all so overwhelming, so unbelievable, but she felt an enormous sense of relief as well that perhaps her children’s lives had been spared.
 
She sat down on the couch and rested her head in her hands as Zach called his friends.
 
It dawned on her that if Zach’s story was true then technically she was the mother of two teenage sons.
 
The random thought crossed her mind that she wished she had some homemade cookies she could offer them.
 
It was the only maternal thing she could think of to do.

“They’ll be here in a minute,” Zach announced, ending the call.
 
Jessica nodded and offered a small smile.

“So tell me about yourself, Zach,” Jessica asked, still too in shock to know quite what to say at this point.

“I’m 17 — a junior at Allendale High.
 
I’m on the wrestling team.”

Jessica grinned.
 
“No wonder you look so strong.
 
I bet the girls just love you.”
 
Zach’s face reddened at the compliment.
 
“Is there somebody special?”

“Yeah, Paige — you met her.
 
She’s the only person I’ve ever been able to really be myself around.
 
She’s about as special as it gets.”
 
His face took on that faraway look of someone remembering the greatest day of their life.

“She knows all about….Cody?” Jessica stumbled over the name, realizing it was the first time she said it aloud.

“Yeah, she knew Paige and Rider since she was a little kid, so when we met it was like I didn’t even have to convince her, she already believed me and accepted me for who I am — for who we are.”

“It sounds like you love her.”

“Yeah, we really do.”

Jessica cocked her eye at the plural.
 
“So Cody loves her too?”

“Oh yeah, he’s head over heels!
 
I mean, it’s easy to see why.
 
No one’s ever cared about him before.….not even me.”
 
Zach hung his head in shame at his spontaneous confession.
 
He had never put it into words like that before.
 
It sounded terrible.

Jessica’s heart broke for Cody as she realized what Zach was saying, and it broke again when she realized that ultimately she was the one to blame.
 
Her son hadn’t died that fateful day when she had decided to end his life, but he might as well have.
 
Instead, he became a prisoner in a world that would never accept him.

“I’m so sorry, Cody,” Jessica dared to speak to the boy she could barely believe existed.
 
She put her hand on Zach’s chest and stared into his eyes, hoping to see through to the boy inside.

“He wants you to know he forgives you,” Zach spoke seriously, trying his best to give Cody his say.
 
“He’s really happy to finally meet you.”

The pain in her heart melted as Jessica heard Cody’s words and she impulsively reached out to hug her son.
 
Zach let her embrace him, for Cody’s sake — the warmth of her touch already beginning to heal his fractured soul.
 
When the doorbell rang, Jessica surreptitiously wiped her eyes as she turned to answer the door.
 
On the other side stood Rachel, Paige, and Rider, and she chuckled as she contemplated the absurdity of the whole situation.
 
Would Michael think she was crazy when he heard what she had to tell him?
 
As bizarre as it seemed, she still believed these unknown teenagers and their fantastical story, and somehow the thought of Michael having supernatural powers didn’t seem all that impossible to imagine.

“Hi, Miss Reynolds, it’s nice to see you again,” Rider said, holding out his hand for a handshake.
 
Jessica glanced briefly at his outstretched hand then stared deeply into his eyes.
 
She saw love and acceptance, not the fear and revulsion she expected to see, and impulsively she grabbed her son in a motherly embrace.
 
She let out a sigh of relief when Rider responded by laying his head on her shoulder, his strong, tall form hunched over hers.

“I owe you an apology, but it could never be enough to make up for what I’ve done,” Jessica offered, but Rider just shook his head.

“I don’t regret a single thing.
 
I’ve had an amazing life so far and I wouldn’t change a minute of it,” Rider said emphatically, the joy in his eyes all the proof anyone would need.