Southbound Surrender (7 page)

“Principal Watkins, may I please speak with you?” Flora the secretary pops her Kool-Aid red bob and cat glasses in the doorway.

“Excuse me, I’ll be right back,” he grumbles as he walks past us. “This is not how I expected to spend the first day.”

Piper’s finger starts tapping on the armrest just inches from mine, and she lets out a laborious exhale. I watch the clock inch along, nearing eleven-thirty and the lunch period, and I hope that Watkins gets his scolding done fast. I don’t want to miss any extra time I can spend with Piper.

“So you like pink, huh?” Big Dave breaks the silence.

“Yeah,” Piper says, still tapping the armrest.

“Cancer,” I say as I turn toward her in slow realization. “That’s why you wear pink, isn’t it? Like an homage to breast cancer, but all cancer, all the time.”

“Your son is quick,” Piper says to Big Dave.

“At least you could’ve found a different place than one of my supply closets,” Big Dave says. “That’s my only gripe.”

Piper lets out a low whistle and leans down to look at him with wide eyes. “I’m sorry, Mr. Rowland.”

“Big Dave and apologies accepted.” He holds out his hand to her. “Nice to meet you, Piper. So you’re the reason why my son has been losing sleep and taking cold showers.” He looks at me. “Well, was it worth it?”

“Jesus, Dad.” I cringe at the mention of cold showers.

“Yes,” she replies before she points at the Jesus again and shushes me.

“Good,” Big Dave says, “Just don’t let it happen again in my closet. Why a cigar?”

“Won’t happen in your closet again and because the cigar was worth two hundred dollars.” I nod my head. I know that will be the extent of my punishment from Big Dave. Yes, I do realize how lucky I am.

“That seems like an awful lot of money for one cigar, don’t you think?” Big Dave asks as he picks it up and rolls it in between his fingers. He glances toward the door and then sniffs it before putting it back down.

“That’s it?” Piper asks. “Just don’t let it happen again?”

“Yeah,” Big Dave answers. “There’s nothing else to say. Just find somewhere else and maybe consider staying in class.”

Piper sits back in her chair and lets out a small noise that I can’t quite decipher, but it makes me squirm. Principal Watkins walks into his office again and a tall, brooding man with a full head of black hair, black glasses and black suit glides in behind him. His stride is strong, like he’s got somewhere better to be. His presence makes my balls crawl up into my stomach. He’s the type of person that makes everyone and everything around him stop when he enters a room. He’s
that
guy. He’s also the guy that stormed toward Hudson and me on the other side of the fence.

Piper begins tapping her foot, her pink shoe dancing against the floor.

“Please have a seat, Dr. Sullivan,” Principal Watkins points to a chair against the wall.

I watch him for a second before I turn my eyes back to Principal Watkins. As much as I want to stare at him, I’m afraid Dr. Sullivan will snap my neck in two pieces before I can blink. Big Dave stiffens in the seat next to me.

“We’re not going to rehash the events of this morning as they are all pretty clear for everyone in this room, especially Mr. Rowland and Ms. Sullivan.” Principal Watkins clears his throat before continuing, “This behavior is not tolerated at Xavier High School, and I am very disappointed that two of our top students partook in this inexcusable escapade.”

Escapade? The word’s a bit strong, but if this is what being with Piper is like, then I fully want my entire life to be filled with escapades of all shapes, colors, and sizes. I want a Piper Escapade every day.

“Absolutely not tolerated,” Dr. Sullivan adds. “Please continue. I’m in surgery at noon.”

“Sure, sure,” Principal Watkins nervously shuffles a paper or two and then says, “You’re both suspended for three days.”

“Three days? That seems extreme, don’t you think?” Big Dave asks.

“I’m sorry. We haven’t met. I’m Dr. William Sullivan,” Dr. Sullivan leans forward but doesn’t offer his hand to Big Dave. Dr. Sullivan’s face suddenly falls.

“I am Cash’s father, Dave Rowland.” Big Dave says with hollowness that I don’t recognize. “Did you say you have a surgery at noon?”

“Yes.” Dr. Sullivan clears his throat, sits back in his chair and awkwardly crosses his legs. I study Big Dave’s face, trying to figure out what I just missed. The tension in the room skyrocketed beyond a standard faux pas in a janitorial closet.

“Three days is adequate. Piper?” Dr. Sullivan stands up with no intention of waiting for a response from his daughter, “It’s time to go. Get your things. You’re coming with me.”

“But – ” she stops herself and stands up instead.

Then I stand up and Principal Watkins follows. The only person still sitting is Big Dave and by the looks of it, he’s not going anywhere anytime soon. He’s staring at the carpet, far gone in one of his meditation states or whatever the hell he calls them.

Dr. Sullivan walks out the door and I hear him talk to Flora in a controlled and clear voice that echoes throughout the conjoined offices.

“Piper Sullivan is withdrawing from Xavier High School effective today. Please send whatever paperwork that needs to be completed to this address.”

To say my heart sinks is a total understatement. More accurately, my world is imploding in front of my face.

“What are you doing?” Piper yells as we all filter into the administrative office, except for Big Dave. “You can’t do this to me.”

“Excuse me,” Dr. Sullivan says to Flora who nods her head quickly and looks down to shuffle through papers to avoid the awkward tension.

“We will discuss this tonight when we get home,” Dr. Sullivan says. “No other behavior will be tolerated and no further discussion unless you want me to miss my next surgery.”

“No,” Piper says dutifully as she hangs her head. Her blonde waves rush forward, blocking her dejected face.

“Piper,” I say. Her name rolls of my tongue with a longing I can’t control.

“Cash, don’t,” she says as she gives me one last look as her father turns toward the door without looking back at us. She curls her fingers into a circle and puts it up to her eye before running to catch up with her father. Then her pink shirt disappears through the door.

It takes all my self-control not to yell and chase after her.

Instead, I hang my head and trod back to Big Dave who is still sitting in Principal Watkins’ office. Big Dave’s hands are clasped in front of him, and his elbows are on his knees.

“What was that all about?” I ask.

Big Dave looks at me with hard eyes and replies, “What?”

“What was that all about?” I repeat, on the verge of yelling. I know it’s not Big Dave’s fault, but my alter ego is ready to tear down the entirety of Principal Watkins’ office. I want to sweep the papers off his desk and kick his chair through the window. I want to knock over his desk and stab the crucifix into the wall. Instead, I do nothing but wring my hands and breathe.

“Nothing,” Big Dave says quietly.

I breathe in deeper, trying to focus on sound reasoning. Piper is leaving Xavier. Not Appleton. Piper is leaving Xavier. Not Appleton.

“That wasn’t nothing, Dad. There’s no way that was nothing. I understand if you’re mad at me and want to ground me. I get that. I can wrap my head around that, but I can’t figure out what just happened in here.”

“It was nothing.” Big Dave clears his throat and slaps his knees before he gets up. He puts his arm around me and smiles. “Just a relapse, but now it’s over. I guess we have to go home, huh?”

“I guess,” I say without conviction.

“Suspension always seems like a backward punishment, doesn’t it? I mean, now you get to go home and miss class for three days. What kid doesn’t want that?” he asks as he leans across Principal Watkins’ desk and grabs the cigar. He slides it into his pocket before smiling at me.

“Well, I don’t. I’m going to get backed up on assignments before the first day is even over. I haven’t even gone to my afternoon classes yet.”

“You did the deed, you pay the fee,” Big Dave says as he claps me on my back.

“But Piper –”

“I guess everything happens for a reason, Cash. I’ll be the first to tell you that life can be a bitch, but it’s the journey that makes you stronger.”

“Screw journeys if they don’t involve Piper,” I say.

“The first heartbreak of many, son,” he says as he leads me out of the office. “Flora, can you let Hudson Hawley know that I’m taking Cash home?”

“No problem, Dave.” Flora nods her head.

“Let’s go to El Azteca. I’m in the mood for some bottomless chips and a margarita,” Big Dave says as he squeezes my shoulder.

***

I wait until Big Dave is snoring on the recliner in the living room with his copy of
Power of Now: A Guide to Spiritual Enlightenment
spread across his chest before I sneak out to the garage. I left him a note to let him know where I’m going. I yank up the garage door and roll my Yamaha out of the garage and down the block a quarter of a mile. Once I turn the corner, I hop on and crank the engine until I’m burning down the street. Piper’s house is only fifteen minutes away. I want nothing else than to see her again.

After El Azteca, I drove us home in the old Camry, and Big Dave spent the afternoon mediating and thumbing through some of his battered copies of spiritual enlightenment and self-help books. God, Big Dave really is a great dad, but he can be a little zealous with all that crap, and I get sick of watching him nod his head and close his eyes. I wandered off to my room where I threw a ball against the wall and skimmed through
Gray’s Anatomy
until my arms were too exhausted to even lift the book anymore. I really need to work on that bench-pressing stuff.

Hudson came over for dinner, even though I wasn’t in the mood to see him. He gobbled up one of Big Dave’s frozen pizzas by himself while I replayed the story of Piper and me in the closet. He nodded his head in sympathy and promised me that it was going to turn out fine. He tried to convince me that Dr. Asshole was just yanking her out of school. It didn’t mean that she was leaving. Even if that is the case, I know that I’m not going to be welcome within fifty feet of Piper if Dr. Asshole has anything to do with it.

My headlight shines in the dusk, leading me to Piper and to the fence on the north side of town. The chill of the September night filters through my Xavier sweatshirt, and I suddenly realize what a jerk move it is to wear
this
sweatshirt now that she isn’t going to be there anymore. I hate that Piper came in with such a beautiful bang and now Dr. Asshole is trying to take that away from us. Big Dave’s words keep rolling through my head as I turn onto her road, and I hate every single one of them, “The universe must be balanced, and we must find peace in knowing that the cycle will settle into an equilibrium fit for all us.”

What the hell does all that bullshit mean, anyway?

I stop my bike a few houses down and push it in the quiet darkness until I am next to the fence and the hole and the visions of Piper that are branded in my memory. The McMansion is black. I flip the kickstand down and jog up to the fence in search of the hole, but I can’t find it in the dark right away. I scan the white lines until I see a slip of paper sticking through the hole. I grab the paper, unroll it in a fury and put it up to my face. But I can’t make out the words, so I jog back to my bike and flip on the headlight.

My hands are trembling as I hold the paper up in the beam of light.

Cash,

Where should I begin? I don’t know how to start this letter because I know how I have to finish it, and I don’t want to do that. I guess I will have to do the best I can.

Things I know about Cash Rowland:

1. He is a wicked sweet boy with a grin that melts a girl’s heart.

2. He stole a kiss from me in a closet I’ll never forget (the kiss, not the closet).

3. He is cautious, smart, and filled with more useless information than I can probably imagine.

4. He definitely should go to college and is definitely smart enough to be a doctor. He will be a damned fine doctor if you ask me, but hey, I’m just a girl.

5. He deserves someone so much better than me, Piper Sullivan.

As you read this, I’m probably up in the air somewhere over boring Wyoming or one of the Dakotas (which one doesn’t matter to anyone), or foam-fingered Idaho. That’s right, you read it right. Dr. Sullivan is shipping me on a plane across our great country to finish off my senior year with my crazy Aunt Belinda in California. I’m not writing down any contact information because if this is meant to be, we’ll find each other again someday. I want you to get your head out of your ass and go to college. If you’re lucky, you’ll meet some hot girl in med school, and you can have little doctor babies.

Yours,

The Girl in Pink

P.S. I wrote this note with “your” pen that I am now claiming as my own. As you can see, the flow is phenomenal, and it will become one of my go-to pens in my collection. Thank you, by the way. You still owe me five bucks.

I crumple up the piece of paper and throw it on the ground before I kick the front tire and yell into the silent neighborhood of rich jerks and their mansions.

“FUCK!!”

As I stand panting with my hands on my knees, all I can feel is the cold emptiness that only Piper Sullivan can replace. I stumble over to the crumpled paper and pick it up, smoothing it out to read it again. My eyes blur over the words so I fold it up neatly and shove it into my pocket. I wonder then what Shaman Amy would say to me to get me out of this black hole. Whatever she would say, I’m pretty sure that I would tell Shaman Amy to go screw herself.

I climb back on the bike and sit there for longer than a reasonable amount of time, contemplating the reasons why the universe decided to take a huge dump on me. Maybe it’s because I once stole a piece of licorice from old man Van Rossum when I was seven or maybe it’s because I should have been a little nicer to Jill Haven and her trombone. All I know is that I hate everything about the universe and my Luella Intuition in this moment.