Speed of My Heart (13 page)

CHAPTER 20

Four months later...

As I walked into Cassie's Dance Academy, I waved to the sixteen-year-old girl who worked at the front desk. Emily was sweet, bubbly and helpful. She was also a perfect fit for the small studio that my high school friend, Cassie, had recently opened in Russell Springs. It had been a real blessing, having a place just minutes from my home to dance. I don't think I could have stomached a return to the studio in Jamestown. It was just too soon.

With everything that had happened, and the constant doctor and physical therapy appointments; I had decided to enroll in a nearby private college instead of moving to North Carolina as I had originally planned. The campus was small, and close enough for me to commute. Besides, Sadie was going there, and I felt like being around my friends and family made it easier to heal.

Two months after the incident with Miranda, I had finally gotten my leg cast off. After a month of intensive physical therapy, I had been able to slowly begin the process of re-teaching myself to dance. It was a long, grueling process that was just beginning. The day I walked into Cassie's studio to attempt my first try at dancing again, had ended with me in tears of anger. It was so frustrating; barely being able to do things that a six- year-old could master.

And even though I wasn't anywhere near the level I had been before I was shot, I was getting there. I had even been teaching a preschool ballet class on Saturday mornings. It didn't require me to do a whole lot of dancing, but it satisfied my need to be in the studio.

My biggest help in the healing process had been Cole. He’d been hopping a plane almost weekly to visit. Often leaving directly after a race to come straight to me. And it was a good thing he was so willing to do that; I literally ached for him when we were apart.

Setting down my bag on a stool in the corner of the room, I turned the music on. After stretching, I began a ballet routine that I had performed often before my injury. I’d been working on it for the past couple of months, frustratingly trying to teach my leg to move in the same ways it had easily moved before. And, I was finally making progress. I had the dance down almost as well as I ever had. I was to the point now where I could actually get lost in the movements, so naturally I was able to do them.

 As the last note of the music sounded and the dance ended, I was startled by the sound of someone clapping. I whirled around to see Cole standing in the doorway of the room, a huge smile on his face.

"You were amazing, Mara," he said approvingly. The look of awe on his face made it obvious he was shocked by how much progress I had made. He had never seen me dance before the injury, but he'd seen my struggle just to walk afterwards.

I smiled shyly. I had never been one to be nervous performing in front of others, but I wasn't so confident about my abilities anymore.

"Thank you," I muttered, embarrassed. But then I was so excited at his unexpected appearance, I forgot all about it.

I flew across the room, throwing my arms around his neck and pressing my lips to his; pulling him into a kiss that showed just how happy I was to see him. "I thought you have a race in a couple of days?" I asked breathlessly.

"I do," he said, brushing a few stray strands of hair from my face. "I wanted to see you, though. And I have something to ask you."

I raised my eyebrows. "What do you have to ask me?" I frowned, thinking it must be pretty important for him to have jumped on a plane when he had to be back in North Carolina tomorrow.

He smirked, shaking his head. "So impatient," he teased.

I playfully pushed his shoulder. "Okay, then. You tell me when you're ready," I said with mock exasperation. Cole was all the time doing this to me. And he got way too much enjoyment out of it.

"That's the plan," he said as we made our way to his jeep. "I kind of enjoy keeping you in suspense."

"Yeah," I said sarcastically. "I've kind of figured that out about you by now."

We drove to my grandparent's house, leaving my car in the parking lot of the studio until the next day.

Cole went into the living room to hang out with my grandparent's, while I hopped in the shower and changed clothes. By the time I made my way downstairs, they were deep in conversation. It came to an abrupt halt when I entered the room. I narrowed my eyes at them as I sat cautiously on the sofa next to Cole.

"What were you all talking about?" I demanded, feeling left out.

My suspicions were raised even further when both of my grandparents looked at Cole, instead of answering. My gaze shot to Cole, as well.

"Cole?" I drew out in warning. What were they being so secretive about?

Cole grinned over at me in amusement, his dimples making him irresistible. He enjoyed teasing me entirely too much. And then he had the audacity to look so stinking good, when we were sitting in a room with my grandparents. He could be infuriating.

"Well," he paused for suspense, causing me to groan in frustration. "I was hoping you might come to Charlotte for Christmas? Stay with me. Meet my Mom. That kind of thing."

"Charlotte?" I echoed. I was totally taken off guard. I hadn't expected him to want me to spend the holidays with him. And meet his mom? Just the thought was terrifying.

"Yes, Charlotte," he laughed, looking at me like I might have lost my mind. "You know," he reminded me jokingly, "the place I live."

I rolled my eyes at him teasingly and smiled. "Absolutely," I said excitedly. "I'd love to." The prospect of being with him in his own environment was thrilling; even though I'd never spent a Christmas away from my family. Maybe that's what they'd all been discussing when I interrupted earlier.

Either way, the fact that Cole had come all the way to Kentucky to ask me in person, was completely over-the-top sweet.

Finally a guy who treated me right; one that actually exceeded my expectations.

"When do I leave?" I asked, already looking forward to it.

"I was hoping next Wednesday? I already booked your flight."

I raised my eyebrows at him. "Oh, well weren't you very confident in yourself?" I teased. 

He laughed. "Not as much as you might think," he said. "I was actually very nervous you wouldn't want to leave your family during the holidays."

"We told him we'd be happy to have him take you off our hands," my grandfather interjected jokingly. "All this extra time you've spent at home lately, cleaning and weeding, haven't left anything for your grandmother to do."

I smirked at him, shaking my head. My grandparent's had been urging me to get out more and do things. Which was ironic, since it used to be the opposite. But, now, they seemed more worried I wouldn't fully participate in life, rather than worrying about my being in danger. It helped that Marcus had moved back to Ohio, citing that he felt stalked by Miranda. Apparently, she had been calling him relentlessly and sending letters from the psych ward she was in. Which was laughable almost, considering he was getting a taste of what it felt like to be stalked by someone. Even so, I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy.

I looked back at Cole. "Well, seeing as how my grandparents are practically kicking me out, it looks like I'm definitely coming. In fact," I said, "next Wednesday can't come fast enough." I winked at him, and the corners of his mouth turned up, letting me know he knew exactly what I was getting at.

I stepped off the plane in Charlotte with my stomach in excited knots. Eeek! I couldn't believe I was finally getting to see where Cole was from. Somehow, I knew this could be a major turning point in our relationship. It was also a little scary. What if I didn't fit into his world, and he realized that our lives were just too different?

The minute I caught sight of Cole's handsome face, I forgot all my anxieties. Running up to him, I threw my arms around his neck, kissing him passionately on his lips. It had been over a week since I'd seen him; possibly the longest we'd gone in our six month relationship. It was crazy how much he had probably spent catching flights to see me so often, and then hurrying back to make the next race. I really don't know how he had done it. And, thank God, his racing hadn't suffered any. Cole had been on a winning streak since his return to the sport. I even tried to watch one of his races on tv, but ended up turning the channel because it was making me a nervous wreck. I kept envisioning some horrendous accident and I was scared to death Cole was going to get hurt… or worse.

When the kiss ended, Cole pulled back, smiling at me in amusement. "I don't know that I've ever had a welcome like that in an airport before. I could get used to it."

I cocked my head to the side, looking at him doubtfully. "Really?" I teased him. "I find that hard to believe considering there are dozens of jealous females glaring at me right this minute."

He leaned over to murmur in my ear. "But none of them look even half as delicious as you. Trust me. My mouth's watering just looking at you."

A delightful tingle ran down my spine as we exchanged a heated look. At this rate, we might not make it to his house.

After retrieving my luggage, he led the way to the parking lot, coming to a stop in front of a sleek black Lamborghini.

I looked at him incredulously. "Are you kidding me?" I asked, as he held the door open for me.

He shrugged. "What can I say? I like fast cars."

I eyed it warily before starting to climb in. I stopped halfway in, and turned to look at him. "You have to promise to go the speed limit in this thing. No showing off," I warned, "or I'm not getting in."

Cole shook his head grinning, showing off the matching dimples in his cheeks. Ugh, those did it to me every time. I sighed, climbing in and securing my seatbelt tightly around me. I gave it a tug, just to make sure. I wasn't taking any chances with Cole at the wheel. And this car, looked like it could go crazy fast.

When Cole got in and steered it onto the road, I looked over at him. "Really, Cole? A Lamborghini? And I had taken you for a jeep guy." Wow, what a difference from Russell Springs. It made me nervous for what other differences might be in store.

"I just rented the jeep while I was in Kentucky," he told me. "And, I am a jeep guy. I have one of those in the garage at home."

I raised my eyebrows. Just how filthy rich was he?

"Okay," I said, seriously wondering how I had missed this. But, it did make sense. And, what did I expect him to do? Tell me ahead of time something I probably should have assumed anyway given his career?

Cole reached over, taking my hand in his. He shot me a worried glance. "Mara, I'm still the same person. None of this means anything. I'd trade it all for you."

I felt my throat tighten in that awful way it does right before I start to cry. That might have been the sweetest thing anybody had ever said to me. I was barely holding back the happy tears that those words caused to spring into my eyes. I looked over at him. "I really do love you," I told him.

He slammed on brakes, fairly giving me a heart attack, and pulled to the side of the road. I looked at him bewildered.

He turned to me, his gray eyes passionate. "Finally. Do you know how long I've been waiting for you to say that?"

I paused, stunned. My mind raced over the last six months, stopping briefly on the first time he had said those words to me. Since then, he'd said it countless times, but I never had. An omission that I was amazed about myself.

I shook my head. "Cole, I think I just always thought it was understood. I mean, isn't it obvious that I'm head over heels for you?"

"Well, what if you just wanted me for my body?" he joked. "How was I supposed to know?"

At my exasperated look, he laughed. "I'm just kidding. I knew you loved me, I was just waiting for you to realize it."

"I do," I said, seriously. "I do love you. In fact, I'm already dreading leaving you in a few weeks."

"So don't," he said.

"What?" I asked.

Cole just grinned over at me. "We'll talk later. Let's get home. I want to show you my bed."

I laughed. "Your bed? My first time to Charlotte, and that's the first thing you want to show me?"

"Absolutely," he said, grinning. "Can't get there fast enough."

"Oh, no you don't," I warned. "We're going to get there going the speed limit. I'm just as eager to meet your bed as you are to introduce me to it. But, I'd like to see it alive."

He grinned at me naughtily, sliding his hand up my bare thigh. "Alright then, but I'm going to be reminding you of that when your begging me to hurry and get there."

I narrowed my eyes at him, deploring the fact I'd worn a skirt. "You play dirty," I accused.

He gave me a look that said I was right. "Let's see who's begging who to speed?"

*  *  *

In what Cole said was record speed, we made it to his house. And Cole had been reminding me relentlessly who's fault that was ever since.

I found my way to his kitchen, wearing nothing but one of his t-shirts that I'd pulled from the drawer he'd directed me to. We'd been in such a hurry, we hadn't brought my luggage in yet. I could hear the shower upstairs turn off as I grabbed a bottled water from the fridge. I still couldn't get over how huge his house was. I'm not sure if
house
was even the right name for it. It was massive and brick, with several garages. I assumed they housed the jeep he had told me about, and whatever other vehicles he owned. Why one person would need something so big, I couldn't imagine.

I jumped slightly when I felt Cole's arms come around me from behind. I turned into their warmth, and he pulled me to his bare chest. I raised my eyebrows when I saw he was wearing nothing but a towel wrapped around his waist.

"You planning on getting dressed today?” I asked playfully. “Because, if not, I‘m good with that." 

"Not if I can help it," he responded, dipping down to nibble my neck. A shiver of delight ran through me.

Just as I was thinking we might be christening a new piece of furniture, the doorbell chimed. Both of our eyes shot to the front door. I looked at Cole quizzically.

He shrugged, and asked, "Do you mind getting it?"

"Sure," I said. "As long as you promise we pick up where we left off when I get back?"

I didn't wait for an answer. I sauntered over to the door, pulling it open.

I'm not sure who I expected to be there. The mailman, maybe? Certainly not a tall blonde in designer clothes, smelling like the perfume counter at Macy's.

I didn't have any words. I just stood there staring as she eyed me disdainfully. I was suddenly conscious of the fact I was in nothing but a t-shirt that barely reached halfway down my thigh. And I'm sure my hair was a mess, considering.

"Who are you?" she spat out in disgust.

"I thought that was my line?" I said evenly.

Cole came up behind me, still in nothing but a towel. My blood boiled at the way the blonde's eyes were taking him in hungrily
knowingly.

Something told me cloud nine was about to start storming.

"Jade," Cole said to the blonde. "This is Mara, she's visiting. Mara, this is Jade, a friend."

Jade, looked none too pleased with Cole's description of her. I was painfully aware, that I lacked a description at all.

"I was hoping to take you out tonight," Jade purred to Cole, acting as if I didn't exist.

I cocked an eyebrow and waited for Cole's answer. I was more than interested.

He ran his hand through his hair, a sign I knew meant he was stressed. "Look Jade, we'll talk later. I'm busy right now."

Having heard enough, I wondered away, not really caring what else they had to talk about. I went to the garage, grabbing my suitcase, and then headed upstairs. I found Cole's room after a series of wrong turns, and laid a comfortable maxi skirt and fitted white t-shirt out. Climbing in the shower, I turned it on, letting the hot water wash away the sudden doubts and anxiety I was feeling.

Maybe it was silly of me not to have considered that while Cole and I both had said I-love-you's; we still hadn't defined our relationship. Worse yet, it had been my idea not to. Unfortunately, I hadn't known how gut-wrenching it would feel to see another girl on Cole's doorstep. 

Not sure what her presence meant, I got out of the shower wrapping a towel around me. When I stepped out of the steamy bathroom, Cole was sitting on the bed. He had dressed in cargo shorts and a collared polo and despite my confusion, I couldn't help but notice how good he looked.

"Mara," he said, his voice tentative; like he expected me to flip out on him any second. This leggy model girl showing up was the first real hurdle in our relationship and I could tell he wasn't sure how I would handle it. "I wanted to make sure you didn't have the wrong impression about Jade." He ran a hand through his hair, letting out a deep breath. My lip quirked at how much that sign of stress had been happening lately. I was getting pretty good at reading his body language.

I waited silently for him to explain.

"I dated her up until I left for Russell Springs. I called things off not long before I left." He stood up, walking over to me and putting his hands on my shoulders. His gray eyes pinned mine and he said emphatically, "There is nothing between Jade and I, or anyone else for that matter. There hasn't been since the day I met you. She is one of the women I was referring to when I told you how artificial the females I attract usually are. She was always after the money, the lifestyle, but never me."

I let out a slow breath, nodding. "I believe you," I said with conviction. What
could
I say? The guy had every piece of my heart. It would destroy me not to believe him.

Relief flooded his eyes. Cole pulled me into his arms, murmuring in my ear, "You're the only one I want. The only one I'll ever want. I need you to believe that."