Spicing Up Trouble: a romantic comedy (26 page)

"We aren't having sex in the back seat of a moving car," I said.

"Perish the thought," Ben said, opening a bottle of sparkling grape juice.

He produced two champagne glasses and poured without a spill. Another point for the limo: smoothest ride ever.

"I propose a toast: to Benjamin Nance Cobb, painter, husband, father-to-be, and lover extraordinaire," I said.

We clinked glasses and downed our juice.

"Well-spoken and all true," he said, topping off our drinks. "Another toast: to you who makes all brighter and beautiful."

After I polished off my second chilled glass, I kissed him. My first mistake as his hand traveled up my skirt and rested on my thigh.

Fifteen minutes of lip locked nirvana then my bone-melting climax. My skirt wrapped around my rib cage. My panties were drenched, ripped, and dangling from one of my ankles. He put his handkerchief between my legs and I left it in place. I smoothed down my skirt and sat back on the seat. He draped his suit coat on me like a blanket.

"I don't know what was in the bottle, but I think it was mislabeled. Sparkling aphrodisiac fluid would be more appropriate," I said.

"Think of the ad campaign," he said.

"Now I know why kids love it."

"As soon as we get home, we'll finish our legal business," he said in a low gruff voice.

"And buy more fake champagne."

The limo suddenly came to a stop. He knocked on the window, and Mark lowered the screen.

"What's wrong?" Ben asked.

"The street's closed. A water main break. We are being detoured."

"Beautiful. Have some carbonated apple juice."

"Thank you. Are you okay?" Mark asked me.

"Fine," I said.

"Close the screen. I don't think she wants to be sick in front of you," Ben said.

"The wedding or the sex?" Mark's voice lifted barely above a whisper.

Ben glared at his soon-to-be dead friend.

"If it's rocking, don't come knocking. It's written all over your face, buddy. You had a little romp," Mark whispered.

"Don't you dare breathe a word of it to anyone."

"Are you crazy? I don't give a shit about you, but I like Alexia too much."

Mark leaned over and retrieved a small waste can. He handed it to Ben, winked, and closed the screen.

"Do you need this?" he asked, offering me the bucket.

"No, I think the wedding and sex helped my morning sickness. I should write a new chapter for my pregnancy book."

"I'll provide the illustrations and a how-to manual."

"My husband is generous to a fault. Do you believe in Fate?"

"No," he replied as he wrapped his arm around my shoulder.

"I mean it. We have very little in common, but I feel we were meant for each other."

"I'm glad you feel that way since you're stuck with me for life. We met and fell in love. Complete strangers have been doing this for centuries."

"We have a spiritual connection."

He laughed out loud.

"I'm serious."

"I'm listening to every word," he said, pouring me another glass of juice.

"Our parents had trouble conceiving children. We have known each other four months, and I'm already expecting."

"Do you think our parents made love as often and as furiously as we do? My guess is neither set almost did it on their wedding day in the back seat with a potential audience a few feet away. My father was crazy about my mother, but she would have never done what we just did."

"I've lost my mind. I admit I'm addicted to you and shameless. Mark isn't even five feet away," I said as my blush warmed my neck.

"Don't worry about him. He's not easily shocked or affronted. I think you need sleep and solid food. I would be more concerned if you dreamed professional wrestling was real." He kissed me, and I snuggled in next to him.

"I'm pregnant, not insane."

"We leave for Florida in the morning. Do you need anything before we go?" he asked.

"No, I packed yesterday."

"Bathing suit, lingerie, and plenty of oil?"

"Yes and clothes. How long will we stay with your father?"

"A couple of days. If he bugs us too much, we'll go to a hotel."

"Have you told him anything?" I tried to hide my concern. Mr. Cobb may think I got pregnant on purpose to snare his most eligible son.

"No, I want to see his reaction to the news."

"Will he be angry?"

He took my hand to reassure me.

"He's crazy about you. He might rant about what a mistake you've made," he said, kissing my fingers.

"I mean upset about the baby?"

"Heaven help him. I won't tolerate any vulgar remarks from him," he said as he put his hand protectively on my stomach.

"You tell him about the wedding. I'll tell him about the baby."

"Are you sure?"

"I've got to deal with him sooner or later. May as well jump in with both feet."

The limo pulled into the parking garage of our building. Ben picked up my panties and the handkerchief and put both in his pocket. I had to step out delicately. Flashing the security cameras in the garage was something I wanted to avoid. Mark helped me out and kissed my cheek.

"Kissing brides brings good luck," he said.

"Or a fractured rib," Ben said.

I kissed Mark back.

"I'm sorry you missed the wedding. Thank you for tolerating all the theatrics today. We couldn't have done it without you," I said.

Bad choice of words.

Mark peered around me into the back seat and smiled. In the dictionary for the word
tart
were pictures of a fruity dessert and a mussed up me.

He hugged Ben, got back in the car, and drove away.

"Mark's a sweet guy," I said.

"No matchmaking eyes. Your sisters would eat him alive."

"Neither one of them would suit Mark, and I like him too much to throw him into the death cage."

He led me to the elevator and up to our home.

"Sex or food?" he asked.

"Bed, sweet bed," I said

"Good, I'm not hungry either."

The elevator doors opened, I stepped out and was immediately swept off my feet. He held me comfortably against him.

"It's customary to carry the bride over the threshold," he said.

He opened the door and set me on the floor.

"How about a little wedding cake? Eleanor said to be creative with what she put in the fridge. It's either devil's food or dildos," I said as I set my purse on the foyer table.

"That won't make our union official," he said, dropping his shirt. "I looked it up, back seat quickies don't count."

"When did you have time?"

"I'm an expert on such important matters. Trust me. First we need to set the mood."

He closed the blinds, selected a sultry cd, and lit some candles.

"Why don't you slip into something more revealing?" he suggested.

"I'm already commando. What did you have in mind?"

"How about some heels and the garters?"

"Okay."

We met up in the kitchen. The floor and the table would be too hard and cold for my back. The wall wouldn't be comfortable either. The chair looked wide and sturdy.

I put the cake on the table then selected a knife.

"I think we cut it together," I said.

He angled around behind me, wearing only boxers.

"Are you okay? You move like you're in pain," I said.

"I am. Hurry up."

We sliced a big piece. I put a small bite on my fork and held it out to him. He took my hand, slid the piece in his mouth, and licked the frosting from my fingers. He cut off the next piece and put it in his mouth.

"We're supposed to take turns," I complained.

He pushed the cake in my mouth with his tongue. I started to laugh, but he held my chin and kept the cake inside. I swallowed the piece, and he let go. He licked the frosting off of my lips.

"Sit down," I said.

"Are we done with the cake?"

"Hardly."

He seemed intrigued as he sat. I picked up the cake plate and straddled his lap.

I used the fork and started serving both of us. By the end, I used my body to feed him. I held the fork above my nipple so he would take both in his mouth. I offered another on my tongue. He took the plate and had me lean over the table. He pushed the remaining cake on my back and licked it clean. When he finished, I stood and faced him.

"Would you like another piece?' I asked demurely.

His smile grew slowly.

"Of you or the cake?" he asked, picking me up again.

I anticipated liking this marriage business. We adjourned to the bedroom.

He slid into bed next to me and fingered a garter.

"All the promises I made today I meant with all my heart. You are the best part of me now. I will love, honor, protect, adore, cherish, treasure, admire, respect, desire, defend, and spoil you all the days of my life. We'll be excellent parents. Our children will want for nothing. I've never felt better about the future, and I owe it all to you," he said, kissing me.

"I've never been so happy. I love you, too. I'll work hard to be worthy of your praises. Our son or daughter is a lucky baby to have such a well-rounded role model. You will be his or her hero."

He cupped my breasts, kissing and tickling them with his unshaved cheek. I moaned softly as he snaked down my body with his tongue. So far, marriage agreed with me. And then some.

The morning came too soon. Our flight had been scheduled to leave at noon. I had to move, but it was too much work. Maybe he would feed me breakfast in bed. I conjured up an image of Ben using his body as a breakfast tray. Did we have any donuts? I should join him in the shower. A little soap here and there. Too late. The water switched off. He walked out wearing a towel around his waist.

"You probably need to get up soon," he said.

After a shower, I dressed casually: khaki skirt and a navy T-shirt. We picked up our luggage and headed out.

I closed my eyes and let the dread of the weekend seep in.

CHAPTER SIXTEEN

We flew down on Mr. Cobb's private plane and arrived around three in the afternoon. A chauffeur met us and brought us to a palace.

"Dad's version of laid back," Ben said.

It would take a week to finish the house tour.

"Good afternoon, Mr. Cobb," a man said.

"Gavin, good to see you again. This is my wife, Alexia,"

"Mrs. Cobb, welcome and congratulations," he said, shaking my hand.

"Please call me Alexia."

Gavin received a nod from Ben.

"Alexia, please let me know if you need anything. Mr. Cobb, your father will be down shortly," Gavin said.

All of a sudden, I had a dizzy spell. We had lunch on the plane, but I felt dehydrated and a little hungry. I put my hand on Ben's arm. He had me in his arms and rushing through the house.

"Take her to the library to lie down. I'll send some drinks in," Gavin said as he left.

Five minutes later, two women came in with trays of drinks, fruit, cheese, and crackers. I latched on the glass of lemonade and downed it.

"Feeling better?" Ben asked.

I nodded and went for a glass of iced tea.

"You need sturdier air legs, my girl. Practice is the only way," Mr. Cobb said as he strolled in.

"Dad, notice anything different about Alexia?" Ben asked.

I stood, hoping to pass inspection.

"Even prettier than the last time I saw her."

"And married. Benjamin Emanuel Cobb III meet Alexia Margaret Hale-Cobb," Ben declared.

Mr. Cobb hesitated then smiled.

"Alexia, don't say I didn't try to warn you," he said, kissing my cheek. "When was the ill-advised occasion?"

"Yesterday," I said.

"Did you put up a fight?"

"No, I went willingly. Now I know what to call you."

"I hope you haven't taken any suggestions from your husband to heart," he said.

"No, I think Grandpa will suit you fine," I said.

Ben whipped out his phone and snapped his father's reaction.

"That one's going in the baby book," Ben said.

"Things are moving quickly between you two," he said to Ben.

"Family trait, when it comes to women," Ben said.

His father offered me a skeptical look and proceeded out the door.

"I take it he doesn't like surprises or is it me?" I asked.

"Don't expect roses from him. He needs time to digest and figure his next move. Life is a game."

"I feel like a pawn," I said.

"No, you're the queen," he said, kissing my cheek.

"Isn't she the piece everyone is after?"

I made chess sound like cheap porn.

"Absolutely," he said as he put his arms around me. "Let's find out what the bishop's planning."

We strolled out to the pool in search of his father.

"This calls for a toast," he announced when he saw us.

Mr. Cobb poured two scotches and a water for me.

"To my lovely daughter-in-law Alexia. God bless you and keep you healthy."

Everyone drank.

"To my future son or daughter and to my wife. You are my life and loves," Ben said.

We all drank again. I stepped up.

"To the Cobb men and women, present and future," I said as I put a hand on my stomach.

We drained our glasses. I felt better but had to pee a gallon.

"When are you due?" his father asked.

"I haven't seen the doctor yet, but probably in the spring."

"Why haven't you been to the doctor?"

"Tad saw her at home. Alexia's been sick. She officially goes next week," Ben said.

"I remember when your mother told me about you. Happy and terrified, I couldn't see straight. I'll go scare up some real food," Mr. Cobb said as he left.

"Care for a quick tour?" Ben asked.

"Bathroom first."

He led me to our room with the adjoining bath. When I came out, he stood on the balcony. Who needed scenery? I could just stare at him. I came up behind him, wrapped my arms around him, and rested against his back.

"I knew he was an old softy," I said.

"The war will begin with a simple question: What are you going to name him?" Ben said.