Read Spirits from Beyond Online
Authors: Simon R. Green
“You’ll believe a ghost can fly,” Happy said solemnly.
Melody had a sudden fit of the giggles, to pretty much everyone’s surprise. Kim joined in. Happy gave the oak beams his full attention, distancing himself from such frivolity.
“I’m not picking up anything from the ceiling in general or the beams in particular. They’re not saying anything to me.”
Melody stopped laughing, took a deep breath, and almost immediately dropped into a sulk. “It’s not fair! If I had my full equipment here, I could run proper tests. I could shake this whole building by the scruff of the neck and make it tell us everything we need to know. With what I’ve got here, the best I can hope to do is poke the local phenomena with a stick and hope they feel intimidated.”
She hesitated, then before anyone could stop her, jumped down from her bar-stool and ran back up the stairs. In a moment she returned with her suitcase. She opened it and set up her lap-top and scanners on the bar-counter, working quickly and efficiently. No-one offered to help. Melody was very protective of her babies. She was soon scowling into her lap-top screen.
“Of course,” she said, to no-one in particular. “It would help if I knew what the hell I was looking for.”
“If we knew what we were looking for, we’d already be doing something about it,” said Happy.
“At least my equipment provides us with specific information!” said Melody. “Unlike certain psychic people I know who wander around pointing at things, and going
Ooh!
”
“I have never gone
Ooh!
” said Happy. “And I can See things your equipment could only ever dream of.”
JC looked fondly on his team-mates as they argued loudly with each other and shared a smile with Kim. He was glad to see Happy and Melody talking to each other again, back to the open bickering of their old relationship. It was how they communicated. Kim leaned in close, to murmur in JC’s ear.
“It’s all very sweet, but how long do you suppose that’s going to last?”
“Beats me,” JC said quietly. “I’m glad it’s happening at all. I would be the first to admit that I have never known what it is they see in each other. Their relationship would baffle a whole coven of psychiatrists. Hopefully, the shared experiences of this case will bind them together again.”
“I have always admired your optimism, darling,” said Kim.
“It’s the only way to survive, working with those two,” said JC. “Or, indeed, with the Carnacki Institute. Melody! Are you getting anything useful?”
“Nothing worth reporting,” growled Melody, not taking her eyes off the glowing lap-top screen. “If I didn’t know better, I’d swear everything here was hiding from me. Bastards.”
“So far, all the supernatural activity we’ve encountered has been limited to the upper floor,” said JC. “Nothing’s come down here after us. So, Melody, I think we need to provoke a response. See what you can do. Happy, reach out and make contact with Something. Feel free to be extremely annoying.”
Melody grinned broadly, tapping rapidly away at her keyboard. Happy looked thoughtful. Kim leaned in close to JC again.
“Darling, is this wise?”
“Probably not,” JC said cheerfully.
Brook shifted uneasily behind the bar-counter. “What, precisely, are you doing?” he said. “What is Ms. Chambers up to with that lap-top?”
“Something very technical that you and I couldn’t hope to understand,” said JC. “Being the mere mortals that we are. But I have seen Melody work miracles with far less tech, and I have no doubt that she will annoy the hell out of whatever may be lurking in the vicinity. Don’t ask me how. Really, don’t. Ghost Finder science is very inexact.”
“Only because you don’t understand it,” said Melody. “Don’t worry, I’ll soon stir these ghostly little shits up and make them squeal like piggies . . .”
“You want to get the ghosts mad at us?” said Brook, incredulously. “Okay; that is it. I am leaving.”
“Finally!” said Happy. “A sane man, a kindred spirit, a man after my own heart! Get your coat, Brook, and I’ll hold the door open for you.”
“Stand your ground, both of you!” JC said sternly. “Happy, concentrate. Melody, anything yet?”
“I am pumping all kinds of psychic chaff into the aether,” said Melody, still pounding away at her lap-top. “I am disrupting all the local dimensional frequencies and playing merry hell with all the paranormal patterns I can reach.”
JC looked at Brook. “Told you we wouldn’t understand. Are you actually achieving anything, Melody?”
“She’s giving me one hell of a headache,” growled Happy.
“Me, too,” said Kim, frowning.
“Good,” Melody said briskly. “That means it’s working.”
All the windows in the main bar suddenly slammed open, and the storm burst in. A bitterly cold wind blasted through the bar, knocking over everything that wasn’t nailed down. Overthrown tables and chairs were sent somersaulting the length of the bar, smashing into each other with vicious force. Glasses and drinks abandoned by regulars who’d left in a rush flew through the air, smashing against the walls. The wind roared through the bar, carrying the rain with it, soaking the curtains and the carpets.
Melody crouched protectively over her precious equipment. Happy and JC huddled together. Brook crouched behind the bar-counter, crying out with shock. Kim stood where she was, peering uncertainly around her, as chairs and other things tumbled straight through her insubstantial form. JC yelled to Melody, raising his voice to be heard over the din of the storm.
“You’ve definitely got Something’s attention, Melody! Any idea what?”
“Beats the hell out of me! The readings don’t make any sense!” Melody yelled back, fighting to be heard over the storm. “But this is nothing to do with ghosts! It’s only weather!”
“Could be poltergeists!” yelled Happy. “Is it poltergeists?”
“Not according to these readings!” said Melody.
Her last few shouted words fell into a sudden silence. The storm had broken off as abruptly as it began, the wind dropping away to nothing. The last of the rain fell away, leaving puddles on the floor. More ran down the walls, and dripped from the bottoms of soaked curtains. The sudden hush was almost brutal, after the rage of the storm. Tables and chairs crashed to a halt and were still, and the windows stopped slamming open and shut. JC and Happy let go of each other and moved quickly around the bar, shutting the windows and fastening them securely. They could still hear the storm howling outside, but now at a safe distance. It wasn’t trying to get in, any more. Kim was still looking about her, frowning prettily. Happy went over to Melody, who only had eyes for her lap-top.
“Well?” said JC. “Anything?”
“No,” said Melody. “That . . . appears to be it. I prodded the local power source with my science stick, and that was what we got in response. A very basic reaction. Interesting . . .”
“But what does it mean?” said Brook, rising very cautiously from behind the bar-counter.
“I’ll have to think about it,” said Melody.
She stared at her lap-top screen with such complete concentration she didn’t even realise Happy was still standing over her. He nodded, gave up, and went back to JC. Who knew a man who needed distracting when he saw one.
“All right, Happy, you’re up.”
“What do you want me to do?” said Happy, not unreasonably.
“Reach out!” said JC, waving his arms around in what he hoped was a meaningful way. “Make contact with . . . Something! Slap it around the head in your own special psychic way and get it to talk to you. Say nasty things about its mother . . .”
Happy shrugged briefly and concentrated. Melody finally realised what he was doing and shut down her tech so it wouldn’t interfere with his efforts. Brook looked like he wanted to duck behind the bar-counter again, but JC glared at him till he held his ground. Kim stared at Happy, fascinated, and went back to hover beside JC.
“Do you have any idea why the storm invaded the bar?” JC said quietly.
“It wasn’t just a storm,” said Kim. “I could feel anger in it . . .”
“All right!” Happy said loudly. He was frowning so hard it must have been painful, but he was also grinning in a really unpleasant way. “Everybody please shut the hell up and pay attention! Look around you! We are very definitely not alone here!”
Everyone looked up and down the wrecked and waterlogged main bar, but there was no-one else present that they could see. Everything seemed perfectly still and quiet. And then all the bar taps turned themselves on at once, and a dozen frothing liquids fell to the floor. Beers and ciders and lagers, all spouting out of the opened taps. Brook cried out and ran up and down the bar, closing the taps one after another. But the moment he moved on, the closed taps opened themselves up again. Brook swore loudly, as the floor behind the counter flooded. And then all the bottles on display at the back of the bar exploded, one after another; blasting vicious glass shrapnel through the air. Brook came running out from behind the counter, his arms up to protect his head.
JC grabbed him and pulled him down, away from the flying glass. Happy was already crouching, both arms wrapped around his head. Melody stayed where she was, peering out from behind her lap-top. And Kim stood still, letting things pass through her with complete indifference. Slowly, things began to quiet down. There were no bottles left to explode, and the taps began to run dry, one after another.
And then, the overturned tables and chairs began to rock back and forth, as though gathering strength and determination. They rolled slowly along the floor towards the besieged people, gathering speed. There was a blind, brutal intent behind their advance, as they headed straight for JC and Happy, Brook and Melody. Kim strode forward to block their way, one hand held out imperiously. The tables and chairs rolled straight through her.
Melody straightened up, her machine-pistol at the ready. She opened fire on the nearest table, and blew it apart with a stream of bullets. Broken wood and jagged splinters flew on the air. But it only took Melody a moment to realise there was far too much furniture, and nowhere near enough bullets. She couldn’t hope to stop them all. The rolling tables and chairs kept coming, faster and faster. Dangerously fast, with so much weight behind them.
The overhead lights started to flicker off and on, so that the whole bar went from light to dark, light to dark.
“They’re destroying my pub!” screamed Brook. “Do Something!”
“This is us, doing something,” said JC.
“Hell with the pub!” said Happy. “I refuse to die by furniture! Do Something, JC!”
The floor-boards suddenly rose and fell, rippling like a slow wave on a wooden sea. Great ragged cracks shot across the walls and ceiling, creaking and groaning loudly, as though the bar was trying to tear itself apart. Tables and chairs rattled and somersaulted across the uneven floor, heading straight for JC and Brook, Melody and Happy, picking up speed all the time. JC stepped forward to meet them, and produced a small round object from his jacket pocket. It shone brightly, the size of a cricket ball. JC held it out before him.
“See this?” he said loudly. “This is an exorcism grenade. Ready to blast holy sanctified light all over the vicinity! So stop this nonsense right now. Or else.”
A floor-board lurched suddenly up under his feet, throwing him off-balance for a moment. JC pulled the pin from the grenade and tossed it lightly into the midst of the on-coming furniture. He turned to Kim.
“Get out of here! Right now! It won’t be safe for you in here when this thing goes off!”
Kim nodded quickly and dived across the room, running straight through the outer wall, and on into the car park outside. JC turned back to the advancing chairs and tables and stood his ground, arms folded defiantly across his chest. There was a silent blast of overpowering, unbearable light, as the exorcism grenade exploded, filling the bar from one end to the other. And then it was gone. There was a pause, and the electric lights came back on, bright and calm and steady. The tables and chairs rolled to a halt and lay side by side on the quiet floor; rocking slowly back to inactivity again. Everything in the main bar was still and quiet. There was an overwhelming feeling of calm and peace. JC smiled cheerfully about him.
“Let this be a warning to one and all,” he said loudly. “I am not always bluffing.”
Happy looked at him. “
An exorcism grenade?
I thought those things were banned from field use, pending further testing?”
“I just tested it,” said JC.
“One of these days they’re going to catch you filling your pockets with whatever you fancy from the Carnacki warehouse,” said Melody.
“What the Boss doesn’t know about won’t give her sleepless nights,” said JC.
Kim stuck her head back through the wall and looked about her. “Is that it? Is it safe for me to come back in now?”
“Please don’t do that,” said Happy. “It’s like looking at a serial killer’s mounted trophy.”
“Get back in here, Kim,” said JC.
The ghost girl walked calmly through the wall, ignoring Happy with magnificent disdain, and considered the vanquished furniture, lying scattered the length of the main bar. She nodded, clearly expecting nothing less, and smiled brilliantly at JC. The two of them gave each other their almost but not quite high five.
“Well,” Kim said pleasantly, “you wanted to provoke a response, darling. I’d say you succeeded.”
“Look what you’ve done to my bar!” said Brook, almost hysterically.
“Not a bad reaction, as reactions go,” said JC, ignoring the barman. “Surprisingly, however; nothing at all to do with ghosts . . . Right then; if the ghost won’t come to the bar . . . Adrian! Adrian; where are you . . . Ah, there you are! Stop sulking and pay attention. I think you need to show me the room where your dead girl-friend is still waiting around.”
Brook moved forward, reluctantly. “You think Lydia’s got something to do with all this?”
“I don’t know,” said JC. “But she’s what brought you back, and it was only after you returned that all this started up again. So I think I need to take a look, maybe have a nice little chat with the young lady. See what she has to say for herself. Happy, Melody, you stay here in the bar. Keep an eye on things. And slap them down hard if they look like they’re getting out of hand again. I hereby authorise you to use excessive force because that’s the only kind you two understand anyway.”