Stay (6 page)

“It’s cold, buddy.” Braden petted his brown head as he drove toward Wes’s house. Not that Jock cared about the chill. He just loved being outside, loved playing.

And here Braden was analyzing the behavior of his dog so he didn’t think about the fact that it made him happy that Wes called. The man just had something about him that intrigued Braden. Even from the first night they’d met, he’d been drunk and had obviously enjoyed getting under Cooper’s skin. He’d purposely needled Coop where Noah was concerned, and Braden would be lying if he didn’t admit that it had been a little funny.

In bed, he’d been just what Braden enjoyed—rough, and passionate. Verbal about what he wanted, and what he wanted done to him. A man who wanted to be fucked and wasn’t afraid to ask for it, but also who made that slow-burn curl at the base of Braden’s spine, making him wonder what it would be like to be taken by him, too.

They’d been at a bar with Noah and Cooper that night, and despite Wes’s prickly behavior with Coop, more lingered right below the surface—pain, anger and loneliness. He’d sensed it then, and he definitely saw it now. He hid it well, but for those who took the time to look, you saw it.

The only time it disappeared is when they were in bed together. It felt like the only time Wes took something just for himself. For someone like Braden, that interested him. He didn’t quite understand it, and wasn’t sure why he wanted to. It was more than just being a challenge, though; Wes just plain caught his attention.

After pulling into Wes’s driveway, he killed the engine, grabbed Jock’s ball and stepped out of the truck. He snapped his fingers. “Stay with me, boy,” he said to Jock, who trotted next to him, practically bursting from the seams to run.

It took a few minutes for the door to open after he knocked. Wes’s sister, Lydia, stood on the other side. The woman flashed him a million-watt smile. She definitely wasn’t happy to see him for the same reason most women were.

“Braden, hi. I didn’t know you were coming. Not that I didn’t want you to. I do, we do. I just didn’t know.”

He grinned and her cheeks flushed.

“I’m rambling. Sorry. Please come in.”

Jock didn’t leave his side as he stepped in the door. People stood in different groups around the room. Chips, dip and other food sat on the kitchen table.

“The best way to find Wes is to search the corners.” She laughed, but it sounded forced.

“I’ll drag him out. Even if it’s just because I’m driving him crazy.” Braden winked at her, excitement skittering through him. He liked getting under Wes’s skin. Liked being the one to fluster him both sexually and by plain frustrating him.

“You seem to know my brother,” Lydia said.

Not really. He had a feeling most people didn’t really know Wes. “A little bit.” Questions swam in her eyes. He had no doubt one of them probably circled around his sexuality, and if he was gay or not. He didn’t hide the fact that he liked to have a good time. He didn’t hide the fact that he enjoyed men as well, but it wasn’t part of his standard introduction.

He saw her confusion, though. Knew she’d probably seen him with women, probably pegging him for being in the closest. Bisexual wasn’t something most people considered, or really believed, which, if you asked him, was bullshit.

“I’m going to go.” With his thumb he pointed inside the room. “To find, Wes. I’ll see you later.” He bailed before she had the chance to ask questions.

The house wasn’t huge, but he still couldn’t find Wes. At least not in the obvious places. He said a quick hello to Cooper and Noah when someone tugged on his arm.

“Hi,” Jessie said when he looked down at her.

“Hi.”

“My polish is coming off.”

“I’m sorry. I bet Uncle Wes would repaint it. I heard he’s very good at nail polish.”

Jessie’s eyes sparkled with happiness. “Good.” Jock snuck from the other side of him and licked the side of her face.

“Jock—” Jessie’s giggle cut him off from saying anything else.

“You brought him! Can we play? I wanna play!”

As if he could read her mind, Jock’s tail started wagging like crazy.

“Well, I’m not sure. It’s dark and cold outside, so I don’t know if you’re able to. Maybe we can ask Wes.”

She crooked her finger at him, as if to say to come here. Braden kneeled next to her. “He’s hiding.”

Amusement pumped through him. “Is he?” From Braden or everyone in general, he wondered.

“Yep!” And then she ran off without him knowing where she went. The kid was a ball of energy; not that he could talk.

Noah and Cooper asked him about Jessie, and the dog. He just got through explaining that he’d seen them at the grocery store and she asked about Jock before Jessie returned, wearing a coat, gloves and a hat. “There’s a flooding light in the back yard. Aunt Lydia said we could go out there.”

He snickered at how she pronounced it. “Thank God for flooding lights.” Braden stepped back. “Ladies first. Lead the way.”

Jessie smiled and did exactly as he said, leading him to the backyard. They had a decent sized yard, with a wood fence and a swing in a tree.

He pulled the ball from his coat pocket and handed it to her. “Here you go.”

Over and over she threw the ball for Jock, who happily ran to get it and bring it right back to her. Braden watched, teasing her and asking for a turn every once in a while. After he threw the ball once, Jock went after it and Jessie tugged on his hand again. “Do you like boys like Uncle Wes?”

He coughed, choking on something in his throat that wasn’t there. Had he asked questions like this at her age? Holy shit. What was he supposed to say? This wasn’t the kind of talk he wanted to have with someone else’s child. Was it better to tell the truth and say he went for both or not? “What do you think?” he asked.

Jock ran in circles around them, wanting the attention.

She shrugged. “Don’t know.”

“Does it matter either way?”

“Nope. Mommy says Uncle Wes used to love Alexander, and that his love was just the same as everyone else’s. Do you know Alexander? I don’t. Mommy said Uncle Wes loved him like she loved my daddy.”

The urge to ask questions climbed up his throat but he held it back. Interrogating a kid probably wasn’t a real kosher thing for him to do. “Jock’s getting bored. Do you want to throw the ball for him again, or do you want me to?” Jessie chose to throw the ball, and Braden couldn’t stop himself from wondering who Alexander was, and if maybe the man caused part of the loneliness he saw in Wes.

***

W
es peeked inside Jessie’s bedroom, but didn’t see her. His pulse sped up a bit, but he told himself to calm down. She had to be around here somewhere.

“Lyd, have you seen Jessie?” he asked when he found his sister in the kitchen.

“She’s out back playing with Braden and his dog.” She looked jittery, and he knew she wanted to talk to him about Braden, but thankfully she held off.

“It’s cold and dark. She shouldn’t be outside.” The last thing he wanted was for her to get sick again so soon.

Lydia grabbed his arm before he could walk away. “The floodlight is almost as bright as the sun. She’s wearing her jacket and gloves. She’s fine, Wes.”

He took a deep breath, knowing she was right. Still, he finished his walk to the other side of the older kitchen and slipped open the back door, to hear Jessie laughing.

Braden swung his arm around in a circle. “You throw farther if you wind up!” Then he swung his arm forward, both Jessie and Jock looking for the ball that he still held in his hand. “I think it went all the way to the moon. Might take it a bit to fall back down.”

Jock ran back toward him but Jessie looked up at the sky, waiting for the ball to come back down again.

“Where? Where?” Jessie screamed.

“It’s coming. Wait for it,” Braden replied to her. When she wasn’t looking he tossed the ball into the air, and as it came back down he yelled, “There it is!”

Wes smiled as his niece jumped up and down, giddy excitement pouring off her. Braden was good with her. Better with Jessie than him. His chest got tight at the thought. Jesus, he just wanted to do right by the little girl. He wanted her to be happy, and he knew he needed to start playing a more active role in making that happen. He wondered how Braden could do it, how the man seemed to be so happy all the time, and wondered why he couldn’t be.

“Hey. Getch’a ass down here and play with us,” Braden called to him as Jessie said, “Ooh. You said a bad word!”

Braden’s big eyes went even wider than usual. “Shit. I mean shoot.”

Wes laughed, but for some reason still didn’t move from his spot by the door.

“Come down here before I get myself in more trouble.” He eyed Wes more seriously than before, and then nodded his head back a little, as if to say
come here
. “Play with us, Wes... unless you’re afraid I’m going to show you up.”

He crossed his arms and leaned against the doorframe. “At a game of catch?”

“He can frow to the moon!” She turned the “TH” sound into an “F” like she did sometimes. The excitement radiated off her, wrapping around Wes and pulling him out toward them. He wanted to make his niece happy like that. Chelle would have been able to do it. She tried to do it for him when they lost their mother.

“Nah, Braden has nothing on me. Let me see the ball.”

“Big talker. Can you deliver?” Braden winked at him as he tossed Wes the ball.

Wes caught it. “Wouldn’t you like to know?” He was flirting with the man but didn’t want to think about that. If he did, he’d stop. Right now he didn’t want to stop. Right now he wanted to have fun. Wanted to forget the fact that he never really flirted with anyone. He picked guys up for an anonymous fuck once in a while, much like he’d done with Noah, but he didn’t flirt. That meant you planned to see them again, and for years, Wes tried to avoid emotional ties.

Tonight wasn’t about that, though.

“What do you think, Jess? Can I throw farther than Braden?”

Poor Jock ran around them, just wanting his damn ball back, as Jessie hugged Wes. She wrapped her little arms around his leg and said, “Hug for luck. You can do it.”

His chest swelled at her belief in him. “Thanks, kiddo.”

He pulled his arm back to throw but Braden’s voice interrupted him. “You have to wind up first. It goes farther that way.” He had a mischievous look on his face, raised brows and a cocky grin, as though to say he didn’t think Wes would do it.

Well, he would have another thing coming.

“Watch out. I’m going to need space for this.”

Happily, Jessie skipped a few feet away.

“You’re going to regret that, Braden.”

He cocked a brow. “Doubt it.” Something about the smoothness of his voice, the way he took Wes in with his eyes, serious yet playful at the same time, told him Braden didn’t mean he thought Wes wouldn’t win their pretend contest. But maybe that he saw Wes needed to enjoy himself a little, and that Braden wanted to see it.

I’m going crazy. This man doesn’t know me enough to care about that, and I don’t know him enough for it to matter.

Wes ignored those thoughts. He’d gotten good at ignoring things. He spun his arm around the way Braden had done. He pretended to release the ball and said, “Did you see it, Jess? It went so fast I could hardly keep my eyes on it.”

“Where? Where, Uncle Wes?”

He pointed. “It went way over there. I think it’s still going.”

“I think it went farther than mine.”

Braden stepped closer to them, and Wes found himself replying in the most unusual way. “Yeah?”

Confusion tugged the corners of Braden’s lips down. “Yeah.” And then he pulled Jessie’s attention away with, “Look over there. Is that it?” She faced away from him so Wes was able to throw the ball high into the air for it to fall back down in front of them.

Jessie looked up at him. “I bet it went all the way to Heaven and Mommy frew it back.”

Threw,
Wes almost corrected. The need to pull her close filled him. He wrapped an arm around her, needing her close. “Yeah. Yeah, I think so, kiddo.”

Braden pushed his hands into his pockets, looking like he worried he shouldn’t be here. Jock ran off with his ball, probably thankful to have it back, while Wes held his niece, wishing she hadn’t lost her mom. Wishing they all hadn’t lost her.

––––––––

B
raden lingered around the house as everyone started to clear out. Wes had gone into Jessie’s room with her a little while ago to put her to sleep. Braden should probably leave too. The only people still here were himself, Lydia and her family, Cooper and Noah. The last time he lingered things hadn’t gone well between them, but he still didn’t walk toward the door and go.

“How’s the rehab going?” he asked Cooper as he put on his coat.

“Good. I’ll be back out there with ya before you know it.” He couldn’t hide the eagerness in his voice. Cooper was born to fight fire, just like Braden and every good firefighter was.

“Good. We need you out there.”

“Don’t tell him things like that. He already has a big enough head.” Noah wrapped an arm around Cooper.

“Come on. You don’t want to complain about that, do you?” Cooper elbowed Noah.

“Hell, do you guys ever stop? I swear, Bradshaw, you’re asking for me to give you shit,” he teased. The two men laughed before saying their goodbyes and leaving.

Lydia approached him next. “My kids are getting tired, so I think Stan and I are going to go. Would you mind telling Wes goodbye for us?”

He held back his chuckle. The sparkle in her eyes said she hoped to be giving them alone time together. “No problem.”

She gathered up her clan to leave. Almost the second she had the door closed, Wes came out of Jessie’s room.

“She asleep?” Braden asked.

“Yeah.” His eyes scanned the living room.

“Everyone left. Your sister said to tell you goodbye, but I’m pretty sure she’d still be here if I wasn’t. I think she was trying to leave us alone.”

He wasn’t sure if Wes would be annoyed by his comment, but to Braden’s amusement, he just said, “I see you know Lydia well. She’s been doing this to me since she realized I would never hook up with her girlfriends.”