Still Into You (37 page)

“How do you know that he doesn’t?”

“Because I haven’t heard those words from him since I was eight!”

Over twenty-three years without hearing her dad tell her that he loved her or hearing him call her
ma petite,
the nickname he always used for her. She missed feeling safe in her father’s arms.

By not telling Ethan about her past and pushing him away, she’d lost the strength his arms gave her. His love. During the infamous second tour, when weeks passed between him telling her that he loved her, when he ignored her, all she could envision was the way her dad was with her after her mother left.

That yanked out every demon she had tucked away to the surface. Mia didn’t know how to handle them; she struggled. When she told Ethan she needed a break, she had just been trying to protect herself . . . and Ethan. She didn’t want him to see her fucked-up childhood and what it had done to her. And when she did let him in, she only gave him an excerpt, not the complete story.

She needed to finish telling him her story.

Ethan

Los Angeles, November 2010

His hands skimmed up soft flesh, over the hardened nipple of a breast. When he squeezed, the sexiest moan he’d ever heard evoked a memory. He knew that voice. He pinched the other nipple and the sound was even louder, the memory even clearer.

Mia.

His eyes shot open and his breath left him at the sight of her smiling down at him. Ethan quickly took in the situation. Mia straddled his stomach, naked like she always should be in his bed, her wet heat feeling so wonderful against his skin.

Her body still felt the same, looked the same. Just like he remembered.

“Hi,” he said, his hands on her back, pulling her closer to him.

When she responded like always, his heart soared. His girl was back with him.

“Hi,” she replied, a soft smile touching her face. He couldn’t hold back any longer. He needed to kiss her.

Running his hand up her back to her neck, he pulled her to him, their lips finally touching after two very long years. It wasn’t enough. Needing more, he cupped her face, angling her just right and delved right back in, his tongue exploring deep.

Her hips moving against his hard as rock cock diverted his attention from her mouth. His dick was desperate to be inside of her. Now.

“Mia? You ready, suga?”

Her lids opened to reveal her glassy eyes. She smiled down at him and nodded.

“You sure, suga?” he asked, one of his hands traveling down between her legs. Her eyelids fluttered and her nods came faster. His finger found her slick and warm . . . oh, so warm.

His dick twitched thinking about being inside of her. For now, he’d be happy with sliding his finger inside of her, hearing and feeling her moans against his neck.

“Tell me, Mia. Are you ready now?” he asked, his lips making their way up her jawline to her ear, not relenting on the pleasure he gave her.

“Please,” she begged. “Ethan. I’m ready. Oh, God, so, so ready.”

And then she fell apart on top of his hand, her pussy squeezing the life out of him before her body collapsed upon his.

“I need . . . I need . . .” she stuttered, holding him in a death grip.

“What do you need?” he asked, slipping his fingers out of her. Mia slid back and stopped when her soaked pussy touched his cock. She lifted her head and her sweet smile stilled his heart.

“You.”

“You can always have me, Mia. I’m always yours. Forever, suga,” he said, punctuating the “suga” with a hard thrust. As her pussy surrounded him, he groaned in satisfaction. He’d waited too long for this moment. Hell, he’d thought it would never happen again, especially since she was with Josh. He mentally shook his head.

Josh.

Fuck him.

Mia was
his.
Not Josh’s.

He flipped her over. “You’re mine.”

“I’m yours,” she agreed as her hips met his thrusts.

“No one else’s,” he groaned, pounding relentlessly into her.

“Just yours,” she said, her hands sliding down his glistening back, her fingers digging into his ass, keeping him close. Her eyes held his, an emotion there he hadn’t seen in a very long time—love.

“Tell me,” he begged, needing to hear it from her, needing to know that all this had been worth it. “Please tell me.”

He continued to pound into her, her body arching up to meet each and every thrust.

“Please, Mia. Tell me.”

“I love you,” she said breathlessly. She swallowed to gather herself and the next words came out stronger, louder. “Oh, God, I love you!” Immediately after her declaration, she let go and her orgasm took over—her words of love reduced to cries of passion.

“I love you, too,” he said, thrusting with each word and then came inside of her. It felt like a damn out of body experience. He took a few deep breaths to calm himself, then he lowered himself to carefully lay on her, but instead of her softness, he felt the wet fabric.

Not her body.

His eyes flew open and searched the bed and room. Mia wasn’t there. But the hotel bed was covered in his cum.

Fuck!

The best sex he had in years was a goddamn motherfucking dream.

Because his teammates couldn’t go an hour past their normal dinner time, Ethan stood alone in his room trying to figure out what he was going to eat. He could order room service, but he’d been cooped up all day in meetings with his coach and offensive coordinator.

Glancing over at the bed, his mind wandered once again to Mia. This was the very room he’d brought her to that first time he visited her in L.A. He’d made love to her on that bed over and over. He could still picture her in the fluffy, white hotel robe, splayed out on the mattress, waiting for him to ravish her.

Memories and visions of Mia had been assaulting him from the moment he entered the room yesterday evening. That damn real as fuck dream top among them. He had never had a dream like that before. Maybe his severe lack of sex was the reason for that.

Ethan had done a somewhat decent job of forgetting her the past couple years. But the things he did to forget her, he hadn’t been doing as of late. There was no other decision to be made. Not once he heard that she had moved on to Josh. That had been a wake-up call. He could lose her—really lose her, if he kept up with what he was doing.

He thought back to their last conversation when he’d laid it out for her and told her he wanted her back. Her response hadn’t been what he’d had hoped for. But having her say she wasn’t ready to come back to him didn’t deter thoughts of her from infiltrating and interfering with his life.

Damn it. He needed to get out of there. Hotel restaurant it was.

Ethan stalked out of his room to the elevator. As he waited for the doors to open, a vision assaulted him of snaking his fingers through hers and watching her eyes light up in desire as they stood in this very elevator.

He jabbed the number for the restaurant and then impatiently hit the button to close the elevator doors. Should’ve just taken the goddamn stairs.

Thankful for the short ride, he took a right out of the elevator and headed down a non-descript hallway towards the restaurant lounge. He glanced down at the floor, momentarily fixated on a dropped business card. When he raised his head, his eyes landed on the woman of his most recent dream.

Fuck.

He immediately stopped and watched her talk to a woman in a yellow dress. They air-kissed each other’s cheeks and the other woman walked away from Mia, towards him. Yet Mia stayed where she was, rifling through her purse, looking for something.

He took that moment to drink her in, with her short black dress, which she covered up with a thick, beige cardigan. Her long, wavy hair fell in her face as she continued her search.

For a short moment, he considered turning around and going back to his room, but he nixed that ridiculous idea and found himself closing the distance between them.

“Mia?” he said, his disbelief that she was in front of him unchecked.

Her head whipped up and when her eyes met his, her bag fell from her hands, the contents scattering to the floor. They bent at the same time to retrieve her possessions. He deposited a few of her handwritten notes, a lipstick, and the same iPhone he bought her years ago back into her purse.

“Thanks,” she said softly, gifting him with a small upturn of her lips, her voice as sweet as he remembered. She secured her purse, her eyes focused on the floor.

Ethan needed to talk to her, wanted it more than anything right now. “Do you have time for a drink?” he asked, his heart in his throat. He couldn’t believe he was nervous about this, but he desperately
needed
her to say yes. Running into her here, at this hotel, after that dream . . . it was a goddamn sign!

She stared over his shoulder for what seemed like forever before nodding her head.
Thank God.
With his extended arm, he gestured for her to head back inside. He fought against his nature when he didn’t put his hand on the small of her back as he led her to a somewhat secluded booth. He sensed her skittishness and didn’t want to spook her.

Mia sat at one end of the half-circle booth far away from him, but Ethan wasn’t having that distance between them. He went in from the other side and scooted all the way around until he sat next to her, his thigh mere centimeters from hers. His eyes fixated on the curve of her knee and the strong muscles attached to it, and curbed the desire to put his hand on it and squeeze.

They didn’t even get to speak before a waitress was there to take their drink order. Mia ordered a plain Coke and he went with the same. The waitress left, and Mia and Ethan stared at one another.

The last time they’d spoken, they had argued. The last time Ethan saw Mia, he’d left her crying on her front porch after her overdose. He’d hated leaving her, fearing that doing so would be pushing her further down the path of destruction, that he’d end up hearing about her death on the news. It was a huge gamble, because even with him, he still saw her depression, the overwhelming sadness enveloping her. Either way, her death could have been the outcome.

But here she was, sitting beside him, looking very much alive. She appeared healthy. Her skin glowed. Her eyes were bright. So different from the last time he’d seen her. Back then, she’d looked frail. Now, she sat by his side and he could feel her confidence. He liked the look of that on her. Ethan couldn’t keep his eyes off of her and barely controlled the urge to touch her.

She fiddled with the coaster, only putting it down when the waitress came back with their order. Only after the girl left and a long sip of her drink did Mia speak.

“Ethan,” she spoke, his name like an exhale of breath. He missed the way it fell from her lips. “What are you doing here?”

“I always stay here when I have a game.”

She seemed to ponder that for a moment before speaking. “I’ve kind of forgotten that football has started. I’ve been so busy lately.”

“What are
you
doing here?” he threw back at her, a teasing smile on his face. Her eyes fell to his mouth before her own lips curved up.

“A meeting with the studio publicist to go over my itinerary and expectations for the
Burn for You
press junket,” Mia said with a nonchalant shrug of her shoulders. She kept her eyes focused on the Los Angeles skyline as she took another drink. She placed it carefully on the coaster, centered it, then focused her gaze on his drink. “So, uh, how have you been? It’s been awhile since we last talked . . .”