“Why are you here?” she exhaled on a breath she didn’t realized she was holding.
“I need to explain a few things.”
“I’m listening.” She wasn’t going to make this easy for him. If he wanted her forgiveness, he would have to work for it.
“When you first told me you were pregnant, I reacted out of fear.”
“You think I’m not afraid?” she questioned meeting his stormy grey eyes.
“Please Lola, let me finish. This is hard to admit to you. I don’t want you to see me as less than a man.”
“I could never think that of you,” she confessed.
Hope bloomed in his chest at her admission. He continued, “You have to understand I have given having children a great deal of thought when I was with Lizzie. And the same fears that plagued my mind with her came rushing back to me. Lots of ‘what if’ questions. What if someone used my child against me in a mission? What if my child was put into danger because of my job? I can’t quit my job; it’s all I know; it’s who I am”
She started to speak, but he held up his hand indicating for her to let him finish. “I was constantly thinking what if something happened to my child? You have to know that I would kill anyone that tried to harm you or our baby.”
She whipped her head up to look at him. “Our baby?”
“Michael came to talk to me the other night and made me see that my fears were irrational. He asked me one ‘what if’ question that the answer to is not something I can live with. It blew all of my worries and fears out of the water.”
“What was the question?” she asked hoping upon hope that he said the right thing.
“He asked what if you found someone else to love and that person wanted to raise my child?”
She exhaled a deep breath. “What are you saying, Rob?” She had to hear the words form on his lips before she could let down her defenses. She had to hear him say it before she could forgive him.
“I want you, Lola. I want us. I want this baby,” he said. She looked at him with love and compassion filling her heart. He said it. She moved closer to him on the couch, pulled her feet underneath her, and turned to face him so her knees were brushing against his leg. She felt the familiar energy radiate down her spine to her core. She felt the tingle spread over her body from the tips of her toes all the way to the top of her head.
She held his face with both her hands, and this time it was her that gently brushed the tear from his cheek. She leaned in until she was an inch away from his lips. She whispered, “I want that too.” No sooner were the words out of her mouth then were his lips pressed passionately against hers. How he ever let her walk out of her life, he would never know. She deepened the kiss by searching out his tongue with hers. He pushed her back gently to lie on the couch. He unbuttoned her shirt and let it lie to the side of her body. Her pink lacy bra was affecting him. She was affecting him. He was straining against the zipper on his shorts. He unbuttoned her pants, and she lifted her hips helping him remove them from her body. He admired her matching lacy panties for a moment before reaching to rid her of them as well. When she was naked from the waist down, he pulled his shirt over his head. She stared at his glorious body. Each look a caress he felt to his core. He removed his shorts and boxer briefs. He smiled that panty dropping, two dimple smile and said, “I guess we don’t need a condom.”
She smiled a heartfelt smile back at him. He nudged her legs open with his. He had to be inside her. Now. There should have been foreplay. He should have made sure she got off, but he could do nothing but enter her. He positioned himself at her opening. He pushed his tip inside her body and slowly buried himself to the hilt. She pulled his head until his lips met hers. He swallowed the moan that escaped her lips as he made love to her with his mouth, his body, his heart, his soul. He withdrew slowly and pushed back in again slowly which forced another moan from her lips. He continued his slow rhythm in and out until she found herself meeting his slow thrusts. She had her legs spread open, one leg lying against his calf, her other leg pressed against the back of the couch. He continued to make sweet love to her. He felt her spasms and knew she was close.
“Come with me. Look at me and come with me,” he whispered into her ear sending goose bumps down her entire body. Never had she felt so thoroughly loved. No one had ever loved her like Rob. She looked into his eyes seeing nothing but love reflected back to her. She knew in that moment that even if he never said it, he loved her. He did own her in that moment. He owned her heart. No one would ever have it but him. As she came, she kept eye contact with him communicating the love she had refused to tell him. His body tensed and he came with her. Together they expanded out into the universe lifting from their bodies. They were truly united as one being as they floated back down from euphoria. He laid on top of her staying buried inside her, kissing her for an eternity. He couldn’t get enough of her sweet mouth.
He still had a question to ask her. After the love she made with him, he felt pretty confident in asking her, still an uncertainty reared its ugly head. He stood. “Stay here. I will clean you up.”
He ran to the upstairs bathroom and retrieved a washcloth. He wet it, rang it out, and returned to where she laid unmoving, enjoying the feeling of bliss that now filled her body. She had her Rob back. He wanted a family, with her. She still couldn’t believe her dreams were coming true.
He cleaned her gently between her legs, taking care over the sensitive nub of her body.
“Are you hungry? I can make us something to eat,” she asked with a genuine smile playing on her lips. Rob couldn’t believe he had the power to make someone so deliriously happy. He enjoyed the feeling.
“We can cook together. Besides, I’m going to take care of you from here on out.”
“Rob, I’m not sick. I’m pregnant. I can still cook. Besides, I want to cook for my man,” she cooed.
He held his hands up in surrender. “I will eat anything my Love decides to cook.” That was the closest he came to telling her how he felt. He still had that and one more hurdle to cross.
She got dressed and made her way to the kitchen. He stayed on the couch where they just made love for the first time and collected his courage.
All of his irrational fears came flooding back to him. He tried to calm his nerves by remembering Michael’s question.
“What would life be like without her?”
That question made him stop biting his bottom lip. He stood and stalked to the kitchen. It was now or never. She had her back to him and didn’t see him get down on one knee. She turned to get an ingredient and jumped when his presence startled her.
Quickly her hands started to tremble. She jerked and spilled the ingredient all over him. He stayed true, not moving. He reached for her hands. Taking both hands in hers, he looked up at her through thick, black lashes, meeting her sparkling blue eyes. He could hear his heart beating their love in his ears.
“Lola. I…I’m in love with you. I know you probably think this is too fast, but when you know it’s right, you know. And I know, Lola. I can’t and won’t imagine a life where you are not mine. I want you to tell me you’re mine by wearing this ring.” He opened the box and her eyes found the stunning one carat diamond engagement ring. Tears streamed down her face and fell against their joined hands. “Lola, will you do me the honor and say that you will be mine forever? Will you marry me?”
He barely got “me” out of his mouth and she was on her knees in front of him. She took his face in her hands and asked one simple question, “Why?”
“Because I can’t and won’t imagine a life where you don’t belong to me. You are carrying my child. I want our child with you Lola as much as I want my next breath. I want the family, the white picket fence, and as many rug rats as you want running around causing us chaos and sleepless nights. Because I know, no matter what we go through, we will go through it together, as a team. You will be mine. But equally, I will be yours. For better or worse, Lola.
A sob racked her body as warmth radiated through her entire being. She threw her arms around his neck. “Yes,” she whispered.
He pulled her back with wide eyes. Did he hear her right? He believed he did and was going with it. He slid the ring onto her ring finger. As he did, she said, “I am so in love with you, Rob Fabik.”
He leaned in and kissed her with more passion, more fire, more desire, more love than he had ever known could exist. She was his and now the world would know.
“You have made me the happiest man alive. Together, we will be stronger than ever. I love you Lola.”
Rob sat in his chair, a cold beer in his hand. He had long given up the hard stuff when his baby boy entered the world. Rob and Lola decided to name the boy Michael. Lola was in the kitchen cooking dinner.
“Rob can you change Michael? I have to get ready to leave for school after dinner,” Lola yelled from the kitchen into the living room.
Rob got up, walked over to the play pen, and picked up a very happy baby boy into his arms.
“Do you have a stinky diaper? Mommy says you do. Let me check,” he cooed as he raised the eight month old above his head to smell his bum. “Yes you do. You do have a stinky diaper.”
Rob laid the changing pad on the couch and then placed Michael on top of the pad. “Time to get that stinky diaper off of you. Yes it is,” he cooed.
Rob had Michael changed and returned to his recliner to finish watching the news. He bounced Michael on his knee.
“Dinner is ready,” Lola yelled from the kitchen.
“Let’s see what mommy made us for dinner, Michael. Let’s see what you’re going to eat this evening,” he said as he made his way into the kitchen area of his house.
They had decided to move into Rob’s house, as it already had four bedrooms. Rob stood up to Mr. Sardeson again when Lola had to tell him she was moving to Maine. But, Lola’s father visited often. He surely enjoyed being a grandfather and he tended to spoil the boy rotten.
“I have to hurry, or I will be late for class. I’m so glad this is my last semester. Then I will finally have that business degree my Dad always wanted me to get.”
“Yeah, but I thought you wanted to be a stay at home mom.”
“Oh, I do! You’re the man, you make the money.” She laughed knowing her trust fund was more than enough to keep both of them happy, without work, for the rest of their days.
“What time is Jamie coming tomorrow? I have to be at work by 10:00. A new assignment has come up.” He raised his hands in surrender. “Don’t worry, I promised no new missions until you were done with school. But Tyrrell still needs me to keep up my training.”
“She will be here at 9:30,” Lola responded.
“And what time will she be here tonight. Or don’t you want me to take you out for our first anniversary?” he asked playfully pulling her to him for a kiss.
“Oh! You still haven’t told me where we are going.”
“It’s a surprise. You will just have to wait and see.
The End