Submission Moves: An MMA Romance (13 page)

“By all means, enjoy your sexual freedom,” she replied, her voice dropping to a hiss, “but take responsibility for it. Going home with strange men when you’re clearly pissed out of your mind drunk is dangerous. I mean, what do you know about this guy?”

“We’ve already added each other on Facebook,” she said proudly, shaking her iPhone at Rose’s face. “And it’s not like I’m looking to marry him or even date him. Sometimes, people just need an itch scratched. It feels good. It feels good to be desired. It’s…it’s liberating and empowering,” she said after a burst of inspiration. “That’s something you can understand, right? You’re always going on and on about empowerment.” She turned to Nick. “Help me out here, will you? I’m sure you’ve had your fair share of meaningless hook ups with girls you never planned on calling the next day.”

Nick held up his hands, laughing. “You’re on your own, Moira. I’m not getting drawn into this conversation.”

“Being objectified and used for your body is not empowering,” Rose persisted. “Just because a man desires you doesn’t mean he values you.”

Nick shot her a curious look, clearly wondering if she’d said that for his benefit as well. Maybe she had. In any case, he should know where he stood with her. There was a club full of women who’d be more than happy to be his one-night lay, if that was what he was after.

“Oh God,” Moira rolled her eyes. “You need to get massively laid, Rose. Maybe you wouldn’t be so uptight if someone would just bang you hard enough.”

“I
am
uptight. It’s my personality. It’s not a symptom of what I’m lacking,” she said angrily.

Nick glanced back at Rose, unable to hide his surprise.

Oops.
Did she just basically admit that she hadn’t been getting laid? Drunk or not, her accidental confession wasn’t lost on Moira, who howled in laughter.

“Seriously, Rose. If anyone needs a night of wild sex with a hot stranger, it’s you. Sex is one activity where you
can
give up control, totally lose yourself, shut off your brain, and abandon yourself to passion.”

“That’s just silly.” The very notion of shutting off her brain or losing herself didn’t sit well with her. “You can’t divorce your brain from your body.” And wild sex with hot strangers was not as simple as in theory. She should know, her hot stranger was right there on the couch with them.

“But we’re animals. Sometimes we just need to respect what our body is telling us. Forget political correctness and everything you think is right. What does your body want? Don’t think about it too much. Leave your politics and all your ideals out of it. They don’t have a place in the bedroom. That’s like having a threesome with someone totally un-sexy. It just kills the mood.”

God help her, she could see Moira’s point and she wasn’t even tipsy.
 

“Like, what is your body telling you? What does your body want right now?”

Deep penetration and rough ground and pound.
 

Whoa, where did that come from
, Rose wondered, a little horrified and also a little…thrilled. She looked away when she accidentally made eye contact with Nick, scared that he’d read her thoughts somehow. This was not what she had in mind when she decided there was no harm in having a drink with him. It seemed like a better option than standing alone in a crowded club, shooting down random guys that might try to flirt with her. But maybe Moira was right. Her body clearly had other ideas and she was no longer sure who was in control.

“Anyhoo, see you later, kids,” Moira said. She got up to go to Dave. Rose watched as they left, feeling uncommonly envious at how simple and easy it was for some people.
 

The club was winding down. After Moira left, Nick and Rose found themselves saying goodbye to a few of the other guys and their respective hook-ups. Rafael even thanked Nick discreetly in Portuguese before he left with the blonde from earlier.

A girl Rose worked with came up to them next. She was tall and pretty with long black hair. Anna was her name, if Nick remembered correctly.

“Are you ready to go, Rose?” she asked, giving her a look that brooked no dissent.

Rose hesitated. “I think I’ll stay for a little while.”
 

Nick was inordinately pleased that she was as reluctant to end the night as he was.

Anna glared at Rose before shooting Nick an accusing look. “And how are you getting home? I gave you a ride here, remember?”

“I’ll take a cab.”

“I can drive you,” Nick offered.

From the way the girls looked at each other, exchanging subtle glares and frowns, Nick knew they were having one of those wordless arguments that only people close to each other could.
 

“Fine,” Anna conceded. “Call me when you get home,” she said before giving Nick one last pointed look.

“Does she not like me?” Nick asked when Anna left. “Or is surly and suspicious her default mode?”
 

“A little bit of both,” Rose admitted. “She was with me in Vegas, you know, four years ago. I’m afraid it’s colored her perception of you a little. She had to listen to me cry my eyes out the whole night.”
 

“Wait, you cried that night?”

Rose sighed and hung her head, looking morose, vulnerable, and very pretty. “Yeah, I did. I just felt so bad about everything.”

Nick raised a brow. “Not everything, I hope. I thought we had a pretty fantastic time that night up until…” It was dim in the club and he couldn’t tell for sure, but Nick could’ve sworn she was blushing. “You
really
cried?”

She nodded, eyes darting away, looking embarrassed.

“You weren’t the only one.”

She whipped her head back and gave him a look of disbelief. “You
so
did not cry. Oh my God! Did you?”

Nick bit back a smile. “Nope, but Angelo did. I was so angry at him I made
him
cry. I apologized the next morning and bought him an X-box.”

Rose threw her head back and laughed, and Nick felt another inexplicable sense of victory.

“I’m sorry about that night too, by the way. I might have overreacted. I realize that now.”

He chuckled at that. “I’m sorry it ended the way it did. That wasn’t what I wanted.”

She smiled shyly in reply and didn’t say anything else. She was on her third bottle of beer and Nick was nowhere near getting in her pants. Oddly enough, he didn’t mind. He liked her, probably more than he’d liked anyone in a long while. Sure, he’d like to bang her sometime, preferably not too far in the future. But he wasn’t an oversexed high school horndog that couldn’t appreciate that cautious and exciting phase of getting to know a girl. And Rose was…she was special. She wasn’t easy, in any sense of the word. This woman held the world—or maybe just men, at arm’s length. She acted so impervious and above it all most of the time. Nick liked getting these little glimpses of what she hid inside. Sex could wait. She wanted it, same as him, that much was obvious. What was also obvious was that he had to earn her trust first and that was going to take a while.
 

He nodded to her beer. “Is there a particular reason you’ve been watching your drink like a hawk this whole time? Do you think I’m gonna try to spike it or something?” He tried to keep his voice light and neutral, but he was a little hurt, dammit. What had he ever done to make her leery of him?
You basically told her straight up you wanted to fuck her, that’s what, you moron.
Okay, so maybe he had been about as subtle as a roundhouse punch in his seduction, but still… “I’m not that guy, Rosie. You don’t have to keep your guard up around me. Tell me what I need to do for you to believe that.”

Rose nearly choked on her beer, startled. “I didn’t realize I was doing that. Sorry, it’s a reflex. Don’t take it personally. It’s not you, I promise.”

She sounded so rueful and apologetic when she said it and even patted Nick’s hand, an awkward yet sweet gesture meant to reassure him. It was the first time they’d touched in four years.
 

He nodded once, satisfied but also a little bothered.
Reflex?
Was this normal for a girl or was Rose just paranoid?
 

“You know, if Chris hadn’t mentioned you were fresh from a break up, I was gonna start thinking you
were
a lesbian,” he said with a teasing smile, determined to get back to their earlier lighter mood.

“You mean because I wouldn’t go out with you I must not like men at all? You arrogant ass.” She laughed and shook her head. “And you and Chris shouldn’t be gossiping about me.”

He shrugged. “Don’t blame him. I asked. I’d rather not be asking other people about you. I’d like to get to know you myself, but you won’t give me the time of day.”

Rose shifted sideways and threw an arm over the back of the couch. They were face to face now, closer than they’d been all night but she remained temptingly, frustratingly beyond his reach. They had a connection or chemistry or whatever. Nick didn’t really spend time overthinking and analyzing those things. It was simple to the core and it felt right. He’d been with enough women to know that what they had between them would only grow stronger. He could take it slow with her, earn her trust, make her stop being so against the idea of the two of them together. She just got out of a pretty serious relationship after all. And it wasn’t like there was some other guy, she admitted as much earlier. Damn, that pleased him more than he could possibly explain, the fact that she wasn’t sleeping with anyone else.

“Nick, I majored in Women’s Studies. I work as a feminist organizer. Some of my best friends are lesbians,” she said with an amused smile. “Don’t you think that if I were a lesbian, I’d
be
a lesbian?”

“You sure you’re not? Not even a little?” He flashed her his naughtiest, most mischievous smile. “You can tell me all about it if you are. I’m a good listener. You can tell me all the dirty details.”

“Oh my God! You’re such a pig,” she said in mock anger, swatting his arm.

He caught her small hand in his and, acting on an odd mix of lust and affection, he brought it to his lips and pressed a kiss on her open palm. He kept his hold slack, giving her a chance to protest or pull back. She did neither. Nick watched as her mouth parted softly and heard her sharp intake of breath.

“Where do you live?” she asked in a breathless whisper.

Nick gave her the name of his Lakeshore Drive building.

“Your place is closer,” she said in a small, slightly trembling voice.

He lowered her hand but didn’t let go and shot her a scrutinizing look.
Are you sure? Are you drunk? Are you gonna bolt after like you did the last time?
“Are you asking to come home with me?”

“I guess.”

“You better be sure, sweetheart.”

She squared her shoulders and took a deep breath. “I’m sure.”

Nick nodded to her half-empty bottle of beer and smiled at her, slow and wicked. “Finish your drink.”

CHAPTER 14

Throughout the torturous fifteen-minute drive back to his place, Nick kept telling himself he would go slow, build up the heat, and tease her until she begged for it. But it was his tenuous hold on his self-control that snapped the moment the elevator stopped on his floor. He grabbed her and started kissing her as they stumbled out of the elevator and into the thankfully empty hallway.
 

The second he got them inside his apartment, he had her pinned to the door with his hard, insistent body. Taking her face in his hands, he kissed her, rough and frenzied. He poured out weeks’ worth of pent-up lust into that kiss, exploring every inch of her mouth, but he was nowhere close to staving off this mad need to have her.
He had to get a grip,
he thought even as he slammed against her. He was acting like a teenager, all his fancy moves forgotten, replaced with raw, unbridled lust. He forced his tongue into her mouth ruthlessly and swallowed her soft whimper. At the back of his mind, he knew he was being too rough. He had to slow down or he was going to freak her out. He really shouldn’t be dry humping her against his front door like a rutting beast, she was skittish enough.

And tiny. God, she was tiny. He had to hike her tight skirt up, grasp her thighs, and haul her up until their faces were level so he could deepen the kiss. Her legs instinctively wrapped around his waist as he thrust her repeatedly against the door, pressing their bodies even closer together.

After one last stroke of his tongue, he tore his mouth away and let out a loud, ragged breath. He leaned his forehead against hers and stayed like that for long painful seconds as he willed his heart rate to slow down and tried to get his bearings back.