Sucking Bites (San Francisco Vampires Series #3) (15 page)

“I only need you, sweetheart,” I say kissing him.

I hug Sebastian and wink at Aidan who blows me a kiss.

I’m not sure why I wink. I think I want to tell Aidan that he’s important to me too and that while I love Sebastian, I care for him too. Danger Will Robinson. This is not a good sign. I think Bast and I need some alone time. I have been spending too much time with Aidan. He’s so deliciously dangerous. Yummy. Snap out of it Lily. Yikes.

Aidan pops out of the room and Sebastian moves his arms down my back. His hands slide over every inch of me and soon I’m reciprocating. I say his name into his ear following it by a little lick.

“Lily,” he says in a ragged breath. “I want you.”

“I want you too, Bast. Why don’t we go to our room and you can show me how much.”

Sebastian picks me up and I wrap my legs around him. Before we have the time to leave the room Liam and Andrew walk in.

“Uh hmmm,” Andrew clears his throat.

“I’m so sorry,” Liam says while he blushes three shades of red.

“No, we’re sorry, Liam. This is your room,” Sebastian laughs. “Lily just got done adding some last minute touches to it to make you a bit more comfortable.” Andrew raises a brow and pointedly looks around.

“Aidan helped me,” I blurt.

“I love what you’ve done with it! An iPod and stereo, Plasma TV, laptop, all the color accents.” Liam is delighted. “This was too much. Thank you.”

“You are very welcome. It was my—our—pleasure and it was fun,” I say.

“You can redo my room any time you want, Miss Lily,” Andrew says a bit stiffly.

“Of course, Andrew. I’ll get Aidan and we’ll go do it right now. You can join us and tell us what you want.” It’s the least I can do. I flick my eyes to Sebastian—the rendezvous will have to wait—shopping is in order.

“I’m only letting you go because you have a chaperone. I plan on continuing where we left off later, Cherie,” Sebastian whispers in my ear and sucks on it, sending waves of pleasure straight to a certain lower region.

I wiggle as I slip down his body sending more waves of pleasure through me. I can see it has the same effect on Bast and I smile archly.

Liam accompanies Andrew and me. He’s curious about how Aidan summons objects. Aidan is in the library with Julian, chatting about Voogle.

“Aidan, my dear, would you be willing to help me spruce up Andrew’s room the way we did Liam’s?”

“Anything for you, love.”

Liam and Andrew give each other knowing looks and Julian shakes his head, but smiles indulgently at Aidan. Thank goodness Sebastian isn’t downstairs. He doesn’t need any more fuel for his fire.

Andrew has no hesitation about showing us to his room and pointing out its inadequecies. He, of course, wants a new computer, Plasma TV and iPod stereo. Surprisingly, he has a penchant for gold lamé and purple. What can I say, his taste is all in his mouth. He and Liam have such fun with Aidan. I just stand back and enjoy. Aidan loves to show off and feeds off their energies. We make so much noise that Helena and Julian investigate. The mood catches and they join in. Aidan changes Andrew’s clothes. He puts him in a swimsuit, then a leotard, then a toga. Andrew’s face is expressive, totally transparent. We’re helpless, bent-over, gasping for breath. Sebastian enters in time to see Andrew in his leotard and tutu. I think the laughter has a healing effect on Liam. I don’t think he’s spent much time laughing these past two months. The tension around his eyes eases.

Finally Andrew decides he has had enough of being a guinea pig and tells Aidan in no uncertain terms that he had better put him to rights. Aidan leaves him in a beautiful Dolce & Gabbana suit. Andrew’s eyes are as big as dinner plates. He thanks Aidan effusively. Aidan brushes it off. He’s fed off the energies in the room, so he has had a good return from the little adventure. I catch Aidan’s eye and he winks at me. I smile back at him.

We leave Liam and Andrew to play with Andrew’s new toys. Helena and Julian retire upstairs to have a little private time. Sebastian kisses me goodbye as he leaves for the club. That leaves Aidan and me in an uncomfortable silence.

“Let’s go sit in the library,” I suggest.

“I’ll make you some coffee, love.”

“Thanks, Aidan. It was really sweet of you to do all that for Andrew and Liam.”

“Liam didn’t deserve his condition, much like you, love, and I like Andrew. He takes care of you and that is important to me,” he says simply.

His honesty and generosity makes me feel humble.

I sip my coffee in silence and Aidan sits next to me.

“Lilith, I have had so much fun today being with you. You have brought so much pleasure into my life in the past few days.”

“Your friendship means the world to me too, Aidan.”

“You know you don’t have to worry about the future. I will keep you safe. I won’t let anyone hurt you. I’m sorry I wasn’t fast enough the other night. It’s my fault that this happened to you.” I’m surprised. Aidan has often been a detached bystander, always a trickster, but I’ve seldom ifr ever, seen him feel guilt. I look into his eyes and see the shifting sands… He is growing up—if a djinn can emotionally mature.

“No, Aidan. You couldn’t have known.” I touch the side of his face trying to rub away the worry. “You were doing what you were supposed to be doing. You saved my life. You helped us find Liam and you found and took care of that Antoine.” I am reminded of what we still face.  “In my eyes, there is nothing you need to repair.”

“I will do everything in my power to keep you safe.” He takes my hand and I see a glimpse of the fire that is his spirit. “I love you. My soul is entwined with yours.”

Oh boy.

“Aidan…”

“Shhh.”

He takes us to his flat in the blink of an eye and we are on his bed.  He begins kissing me and I try and push him away but he gently persists.

“I can’t stand him touching you. I can’t stand listening to him making love to you. I need to embrace all of you, Lilith. Please let me.” He runs his hand gently down my face. “I’ve never been with a woman but I need to be with you, surrounding you, inside you.”

“Aidan I can’t. I would if I wasn’t with Sebastian, but I am. I love him.”

I gasp at his warm breath as he moves in between my breasts.

“I love you too, but I can’t, Aidan.”

“Let me make love to you.”

“I can’t. Not while I am with Sebastian.” My body turns traitor and shivers deliciously. Aidan wraps his arms around me and rubs my back. I gently pull back. “How would you feel if the tables were turned? It’s not right. I just can’t cheat on him. I love you, Aidan, I do.” I begin to cry.

“Shhh shhh, darling don’t cry. I’m sorry. I’ve put you in a terrible position.” He wraps me in his arms again and this time I let him hold me. “I love you more for being honest and true. I’ve never cared for a wit for a moral dilemma before. I don’t know what to do. I feel like I might explode with my love for you.” He lets go of me suddenly and jumps up and begins pacing. “Maybe I need to go away for a while. It didn’t work before. I just saw you in every woman I looked at.” He stops and kneels in front of me. “I missed you so much, I ached.”

“What are we going to do then?”

“I don’t know. I can hardly go on like this. It’s killing me slowly. Do you really love Sebastian?”

“Yes, I do. That is what makes this so difficult. I don’t know how I can feel so much for two different men—two totally different men. It’s making me crazy.”

“Thank you for calling me a man.” He snorts, surprising himself. “Never thought I’d say that. I feel better knowing that you aren’t with him out a sense of obligation.” He sits next to me and envelops me again. “I would take you away right now if that was the case. I don’t want you to hurt and it would hurt you to leave him. Fuck!” He looks pained. He pulls at his hair and stands abruptly.

“Aidan, I’m so sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry for how you feel.” His handsome face is grim, lines bracket his eyes. “If I could change this situation, I would. I’ve tried. At first I pretended that I was just infatuated with you. That lasted about a day.” He laughs bitterly.

I trace the strong angles of his face again and he closes his eyes. Then he kisses the palm of my hand. This is so confusing.

Slowly he lets go of my hand and his eyes meet mine. His sigh is explosive.

“I suppose I need to get you back to the manse. They’re going to know you are missing soon and they’ll worry.”

“Yes. Sebastian will be back soon. He was only running some papers over to the club.”

“Then I better get you back right away. I don’t need him telling me I can’t see you again. The gods forbid,” he says as he rolls his eyes.

We take each other’s hands. He pops us into the kitchen where we are less likely to be observed. I straighten my clothing and hair just in time. Helena opens the swinging door and peeks in.

“There you are. We were looking for you two.”

“Oh, you found us,” I say squaring myself mentally.

“Yes, it seems I have,” she says. Her expression is a little too all-knowing for comfort. I don’t think I fool her for one minute. I’m certain all the despair I feel is plastered on my face.

“Aidan, will you excuse Lily and me for a minute?”

“Of course, Helena.” He looks miserable.

“Okay, Lily, spill your guts, because you look horrible and I had already looked in the kitchen and you weren’t here a minute ago.”

“Aidan popped us to his flat. He told me how much he loved me. Oh, Helena, I love Sebastian so much. I do, there is no doubt about that. But I feel so conflicted about my feelings for Aidan. He wants me. He’s tormented. He’s in pain. I told him that I would never cheat on Sebastian and that I loved Bast. He said he could hardly bear to watch Bast touch me but he can’t stand to be away from me. I care a great deal for Aidan. I love him in so many ways. God I am so fucked up,” I sob.

Helena gathers me up and holds me.

“I don’t know what to tell you, honey. This is truly a miserable situation. I love Sebastian like he was my brother and I would never tell you to hurt him. I don’t think you want to do that.”

I shake my head.

“But your feelings for Aidan have to be validated. I know he’s in pain and his feelings are very real. It is an impossible situation. I don’t envy you. I suggest that once we get this werewolf thing straightened out and you know what will happen at the full moon, that you and Sebastian take some time and go somewhere for a while. Get away from Aidan. Give you both some space for awhile. I think that is the only thing that will help your situation. Then when you get back maybe you will have a better idea of what feels right for you.”

“I think you’re right. He says he just misses me when he is away, but I know it isn’t as raw as watching me and Bast together and it isn’t as difficult for me when I have some distance.”

“Exactly. Maybe South America? It’s lovely down there and Bast hasn’t been for quite a while. It will be good for him to practice his Spanish.” She gives me the once over. “Do you think you’re ready to join the rest of the family? Sebastian is bound to be wondering what is keeping us.”

I nod. “Let’s bring some wine in with us.”

“Good thinking. Do we have any strawberry? I had some at the Queen’s and now I have a taste for it.”

We dust off a bottle of strawberry wine from the back of Andrew’s stock. The glasses are gleaming and sorted by style, Andrew is so efficient. We add fruit for Liam and Andrew, placing it on a tray.

In the library, I am the center of attention. Aidan studies my face. Sebastian looks nervous. I pour wine for everyone and take a glass to Sebastian, sitting next to him. He searches my face trying to discern what has been going on. He can only tell that I’ve been crying. He slides his arm around me and takes a sip of his wine. Then he kisses me on the forehead. I sink into his chest and sigh. He feels comfortable and right. His cool body is familiar and belongs to me and I belong to him. Aidan turns away and I feel the regret that has become a constant companion.

“Lily, do you work tonight?” Liam asks.

“No, not for the next four nights. I only work three nights a week.”

“Sweet gig,” he comments, taking a sip of wine. “It must be really rewarding work too.”

“It is. I enjoy knowing I do something that makes a difference and it gets me out of the house at the same time.”

“You should have heard the call that came in last night!” Aidan says laughing so hard he doubles over.

“Aidan, that’s confidential. You shouldn’t have been listening in,” I say.

“Let me just say that it involved cat food,” he says, still laughing.

“Really? You get some interesting calls,” Julian says.

“Why don’t we all go to the club tonight? It is only ten o’clock, quite early,” Helena says.

“Oh, I could wear my new suit!” Andrew exclaims. “Yes please, let’s go!”

“I don’t know if I brought anything that’s appropriate to wear,” Liam says.

With a wave of his hand, Aidan changes Liam’s clothes for a Burberry suit. He looks absolutely gorgeous and Andrew definitely notices. Aidan winks at me.

“The rest of us should change as well,” Sebastian says.

He helps me stand and we climb the stairs to our room. Once our door is closed he turns to me.

“What happened earlier, Cherie?” His tone is serious, but for once not accusatory. “Where had you and Aidan gone?”

“Aidan popped us to his flat for a few minutes to talk.”

“I knew it,” he says. Here it comes.

Instead of being angry he just seems sad.

“What did you talk about, if I may ask?”

I take a big breath (not easy when you don’t breathe). I appreciate Sebastian’s self-control.

“He had to tell me some things. He has a lot of feelings for me still. He is actually in a lot of pain over it. It was very difficult to hear. I told him that I loved you and would be faithful to you and he said that just made him love me more. It was very intense and very serious and was painful for me to hurt him.”

“I’m sorry for him.”

“What?” The shocked disbelief is evident on my face.

“No, truly I am. I cannot imagine what it would be like to love you as I do and watch someone else hold you and love you and not be able to touch you. It would kill me.”