Summer Daydreams (45 page)

The woman with the clipboard appears again. ‘Five minutes, Ms McNamara.’

Now I’m really, really panicking. I grab my dress from its hanger. ‘Can you give me a hand into it please, Olly?’

‘Sure.’

Olly holds it out and I wriggle into it. My outfit is very sixties; a sleeveless, Peter Pan-collared shift dress in block colours – red, white and blue, naturally. I’ve teamed it with white tights, navy flats and one of my Union Jack handbags. It’s a dress I’ve had for quite a while, but it’s one that’s perfect for the occasion. A big navy bow and some original, chunky Bakelite bangles complete the outfit.

Petal is, thankfully, already dressed. She’s wearing a similar pink shift with a white PVC sixties-style cap covering her crazy hair. I’ve made her a miniature handbag with the same Union Jack design on the front, but in pink and white. It also has extra sparkles on it as demanded by my darling daughter. Now she’s parading up and down in the small space we have, practising the moves that I’ve shown her.

‘My goodness, this is a bit tight.’ I only tried this dress on a couple of weeks ago and it fitted perfectly. But whereas it previously skimmed my hips, it now has them in a vice-like grip. What’s happened? Now I come to think of it, my boobs feel bigger too, and there’s a definite bump where my flat tum used to be.

Oh.

Suddenly the penny drops. Perhaps all the sickness in China wasn’t down to the change of water, the food, the jet lag, after all. Perhaps it was more to do with the wild night of passion that Olly and I had in the cottage in Cornwall. I can’t even think when I last had a period. With everything else that’s been going on, I haven’t had time to notice.

I could very well be pregnant. My hands go to my tummy. Yep. Distinctly rounded. This isn’t all down to Constance’s home-made pies. How far gone must I be? Can it be as much as four months?

‘Everything OK?’ Olly asks.

‘Yes. I think so.’ I smile to myself. Now isn’t the time to tell him. I’ll break it to him when we’re alone, just me and Olly. I’m sure he’ll be thrilled.

My husband struggles with the zip, but finally I’m in the snug-fitting dress. I try not to let him see my contented smile.

‘You look fantastic,’ he says.

‘Thanks.’

Goodness only knows how we’ll fit a new baby into our manic work schedule but we’ll manage. Somehow we’ve coped with everything else that’s been thrown at us. I can’t see why a little addition to our family would be any different.

The woman with the clipboard comes back one more time.

‘One minute, Ms McNamara.’

I take a deep breath. I’m done. I’m as ready as I’ll ever be.

‘Let’s go and see how those models are getting on.’

Backstage is manic. Racks of clothes are ready for the quick changes. I’m relieved to see that the models are all dressed and that no one is squabbling. All the girls are in classic sixties dresses that have been individually made to reflect the handbag collection. They’re all wearing sharply cut, bobbed wigs and heavy black eyeliner. I go along the first row of girls and check that their handbags are all in order. Each one is modelling a different Union Jack design. Looking good.

Petal is, for once, speechless. Her mouth and eyes form wide circles as she takes everything in.

Taking a peek out round the side of the black curtains, I can see that every chair in the place is full and I breathe a sigh of relief. Jen, Constance, Phil and Tod have prime seats in the front row. Right next to them are the fashion editors who could make or break my career. Betty is there, sipping from a glass of fizz and she’s brought Chantelle Clarke with her whose presence is creating quite a stir. They both have my new Union Jack handbag and I’m hoping that Chantelle’s makes the newspapers tomorrow. More than that, I’m pleased that Betty and I are now firm friends again. Needless to say my handbags have pride of place in her shop window.

Alongside Betty are students from the fashion and textiles course at my old college – the one I was at so briefly. I thought it would be nice to encourage some of the youngsters, give them a taste of what it’s really like, and sent along a bunch of free tickets. I’d like to say that my old course tutor, Amelia Fallon, was here and that she now bitterly regrets how mean she was to me and she can see now that I was a unique talent and how she feels it was her ‘turning down The Beatles’ moment. But, unfortunately, she didn’t even have the courtesy to reply to my invitation. Seems as if she holds a grudge longer than I do.

Close to my side, Olly slips his arms round my waist and asks, ‘Ready, Nell?’

I turn and kiss him. ‘Yes,’ I say. ‘I am.’

Looking at the backstage manager, I give her the thumbs up.

The lights go down. The music starts to pump out. ‘The Self-Preservation Society’ song from the fabulous film
The Italian Job
fills the auditorium. How appropriate.

My heart pounds as the show begins. The models do me proud. They prance, preen and pout down the catwalk to rapturous applause. The quick changes go perfectly. For the second part of the show, the mellow sounds of ‘Waterloo Sunset’ by The Kinks wash over the audience and the girls slink on in monochrome outfits, all with white knee-high boots.

For the finale, the girls switch into colourful psychedelic mini dresses and dance to The Rolling Stones and ‘She’s Like a Rainbow’. When the models have finished, they come to stand at the back of the stage. Even above the clapping, I can hear Phil, Constance and Jenny cheering. Always my staunchest supporters. But I’m also pleased to see that the fashion editors, smiling broadly as they applaud, seem to like it too.

This is my moment. In time-honoured tradition, the designer takes to the runway at the end of the show. The curtains part and I’m facing my audience. As one, they rise from their seats and give me a standing ovation.

‘Listen to that, Nell,’ Olly says. ‘They love you.’

‘I never expected this,’ I tell him.

He squeezes my waist. ‘Nothing more than you deserve.’

‘Let’s say thank you.’ Tears in my eyes, I grab his hand and we walk down the catwalk, revelling in the applause.

Then, as we stand together, the curtains open again and one of my favourite songs, The Monkees and ‘Daydream Believer’ kicks out. This should be my theme tune. Olly couldn’t have chosen better songs for us. The crowd cheer their approval as Petal, all kitted out in her sixties dress, wearing her miniature handbag at a jaunty angle, struts down the catwalk towards us.

My daughter, hamming it up terribly, milks the moment for all it’s worth. With her short chubby legs, she mimics the models’ walks and then strikes a pose at the end of the runway. More cheering. She’s positively glowing. Olly and I exchange a glance and laugh. Our child is definitely a diva.

Hand in hand, Olly and I join her. Judging by the response of the audience, Nell McNamara handbags are now firmly on the map. Believing in my daydreams has taken me down a rocky road. There have been incredible highs and terrible lows. But together, Petal, Olly and I have got through them.

Despite all the tears, the trauma, the pain, I now know that I wouldn’t have missed this crazy ride for anything. I look at my friends in the audience, my family beside me, and I know that it’s all been worth it.

Acknowledgements

A big thanks to Helen and Julian who allowed me a little glimpse into their world so that I could write this book. Much appreciated!

In conversation with Carole Matthews and Helen Rochfort

Carole:
People always ask me where I find inspiration for my books. Well, this one started a few years ago when we met on Facebook. Remember?

Helen:
Oh, my goodness. I do remember that.

C:
Your status photo was of Barbara Cartland in all her shocking pink glory and I felt sure that you must be a romance writer. But when I looked at your page I then saw that, in fact, you were a designer of delicious handbags and sent you a note to say how much I liked them.

H:
I went straight out and bought one of your books. It was
With or Without You
and I was instantly hooked on your novels. We started chatting regularly on Facebook from there, didn’t we? Then I designed some exclusive handbags as promotional prizes for
The Chocolate Lovers’ Club
and we became friends in real life not just on the internet.

C:
The bags were gorgeous! Mine still gets an airing when I’m going somewhere glam. But it was only after I’d known you for a while that I found out how you started on your career. Lady, you have such a tale to tell!

H:
I love our long, chatty lunches. We can both talk for England.

C:
Once we’d dispensed with our usual gossiping, you started to tell me how hard you’d worked to get to where you are now. I thought that it was just such an amazing story that I felt it would make a fabulous backdrop to a novel – plus I just love handbags so that was a great excuse too. In five years you’ve started out from nothing with your business and now have your handbags in stores worldwide.

H:
Oh, yes. It’s been an amazing journey. I still have to pinch myself when I’m at the Paris and London Fashion shows or see well-known celebrities with the handbags splashed across the pages of fashion magazines. I then go home and go back to being a mum. Like anyone else, I enjoy all the glamour of washing, changing nappies, doing the school run and drawing imaginary monsters, reading
The Enchanted Wood
and dancing to The Who with the girls. I wouldn’t change that for anything though.

C:
I love the way that you’ve strived to grow and manage your business while bringing up two adorable daughters. It’s so hard. I don’t know how you do it. That was my initial inspiration for Nell in the book. There’s definitely a lot of you in Nell and I think she’s a great character. She’s warm, funny and always tries her best for her family. I think it’s very tough for women to make their way in business – especially in something like the fashion industry. It’s a juggling act and can involve so much guilt. You have to wear so many hats. I think you do a fantastic job. In
Summer Daydreams
I’ve made Nell a strong and determined woman, who is really fighting against the odds to make her dreams become a reality. She goes all out to get what she wants, which is essentially a better life for her and her family.

H:
I really like the fact that you deal with issues that are affecting contemporary women in your novels, but you do it in such a funny, light-hearted way. I often find myself laughing out loud one minute and then crying the next.

C:
I always like it when people write to me and say that they’ve been through what I’ve written about. I try to use real life situations as much as I can. I think a lot of modern women will empathise with Nell.

H:
The other characters in
Summer Daydreams
are so warm and friendly. How do you create those?

C:
I wanted people who would help Nell on her journey. If you want to be successful at anything, then it’s very difficult to do it in isolation. Everyone needs people around them who encourage them to be better. I also think it’s essential to have a strong network of friends when you’re trying to bring up young children and, for various reasons, Nell and Olly’s parents aren’t around to help. That’s tough. Her friends in the chip shop – Phil, Constance and Jen – really rally round for Nell. They adore her and want the best for her. Tod Urban really tries to help her with her business and sometimes crosses the line into something else!

H:
Petal made me laugh out loud. I could just imagine my own daughter doing those things.

C:
With Nell’s daughter, Petal, I could have a lot of fun with her. She’s such a little madam and provides a lot of the funny moments in the book. I like children with a bit of spark to them. She doesn’t let Nell or Olly get away with anything and can wrap them both round her little finger. I think a lot of parents will identify with that too!