Authors: Amanda Hocking
She was coming to my aid, changing the subject from things I was doing wrong to something I was doing right. Even if she was a bitch to Finn and Rhiannon, I just couldn’t bring myself to hate her.
“Thank you,” I smiled gratefully back at her.
My final fitting had been earlier in the day, and since Willa had requested it the other night at dinner, I had sent her a picture. It had actually been Finn’s idea, and he had used his camera phone.
I felt very awkward and not at all pretty posing for it, and he never reassured me that I looked good in the dress. It felt too fancy for me, and I would’ve liked a little boost just then. But Finn had just snapped the picture, and that had been the end of that.
“Have you seen the dress?” Willa turned to Elora, who nibbled primly at a piece of broccoli.
“No. I trust Frederique’s designs, and Finn has final approval,” Elora answered absently.
“I’m going to insist on being involved in the process when my daughter gets her gown,” Willa offered thoughtfully. Elora bristled imperceptibly at that, but Willa didn’t notice. “But I’ve always loved dresses and fashion. I could spend my whole life at a ball.” She looked wistful for a moment, then smiled at me again. “That’s why it’s so great that you’re here. You’re going to have such a monumental ball.”
“Thank you,” I repeated, unsure of how else to respond.
“You had a lovely party yourself,” Garrett interjected, feeling slightly defensive about the party he had thrown for his daughter. “Your gown was fantastic.”
“I know,” Willa smiled immodestly. “It was pretty great.” Finn made a noise in his throat, and both Elora and Willa glared at him, but neither of them said anything.
“My apologies. Something caught in my throat,” Finn explained, taking a sip of his wine.
“Hmm,” Elora murmured disapprovingly, then cast her stare back at me. “Oh, that reminds me. I have been too busy this week to ask you. What were your plans for your name?”
“My name?” I asked, raising any eyebrow.
“Yes. At the christening ceremony.” She looked at me for a moment, then looked sternly at Finn. “I thought Finn told you about it.”
“Yes, but isn’t that name already decided?” I was definitely confused. “I mean, Dahl is the family name, isn’t it?”
“Not the surname,” Elora clarified, annoyed. “I meant your first name.”
“I don’t understand.” I furrowed my brow and tried to read her stony expression. “My name is Wendy.”
“That isn’t a proper name for a Princess,” Elora scoffed. “Everyone changes their names. Willa used to be called something different. What was it, dear?”
“Nikki,” Willa said. “I took the name Willa, after my mother.”
Garrett smiled at that, and Elora tensed up slightly, but quickly tried to erase it. Her plan seemed to push all her tension in my direction.
“So what is it? What name would you like?” Elora pressed.
“I… I don’t know,” I stumbled.
Irrationally, my heart had started pounding my chest. I didn’t want to change my name, not at all. When Finn had told me that about the christening ceremony, I had assumed it would only be my last name, and while I wasn’t that thrilled about that, I didn’t care that much. Eventually, I would probably get married and change my name anyway.
But Wendy, that was
my
name. I turned to Finn for help, but Elora noticed and snapped my attention back to her.
“If you need ideas, I have some.” Elora had a clipped tone to her voice, and she was cutting her food with an irritated fervor. “Ella, after my mother. I had a sister, Sybilla. Those names are both lovely. One of our longest running queens was Lovisa, and I’ve always thought highly of that name.”
“It’s not that I don’t like any of those,” I explained carefully. Although, really, I thought Sybilla was quite terrible. “I like my name. I don’t know why I have to change it.”
“Wendy is a ridiculous name,” Elora waved off the idea. “It’s entirely improper for a Princess.”
“Why?” I persisted, and Elora glared up at me.
I flat out refused to change my name, no matter what Elora said. It’s not that I thought Wendy was a particularly fabulous name, but Matt had given it to me. He was the only one that had ever wanted me, and I wasn’t going to get rid of the one thing that I had left of him.
“It is the name of a mänsklig,” Elora said through gritted teeth. “And I have had enough of this. You will find a name to suit a Princess, or I will choose one for you. Is that clear?”
“If I am a Princess, then why can’t I decide what is proper?” I forced my voice to stay even and clear, trying not to let it shake with anger and frustration. “Isn’t that part of the glory of being a Princess, of ruling a kingdom? Having some say in the rules? And if I want my name to be Wendy, why is that so wrong?”
“No Princess has ever kept her human name, and no one ever will.” Her dark eyes glared severely at me, but I matched it firmly. “My daughter, the Princess, will not carry the name of a
mänks
.”
There was a bitter edge dripping from the word “mänks,” and I saw Rhys’ jaw tense. I knew what it was like to grow up with a mother that hated me, but I had never been required to sit quietly why she openly made derogatory remarks about me. My heart went out to him, and I had to struggle even harder to keep from shouting at Elora.
“I will not change my name,” I insisted. Everyone had taken to looking down at their plates while Elora and I stared down each other. This dinner had to be considered an epic failure.
“This is not the proper place to have this discussion,” Elora said icily. She rubbed her temple, then sighed. “It’s no matter. There isn’t a discussion to be had. Your name will be changed, and clearly, I will be picking for you.”
“That’s not fair!” Tears welled up in my eyes, and I had started to whine. “I am the Princess and it’s what I want! You said I didn’t have to answer to anybody!”
“Anybody but me,” Elora clarified calmly.
“With all due respect,” Finn interrupted our argument, startling everyone into looking at him, but he kept his voice emotionless. “If it is as the Princess wishes, then perhaps it’s as it should be. Her wishes are going to be the highest order of the land, and this is such a simple one that I can’t imagine anyone would find offense with it.”
“Perhaps,” Elora forced a thin smile at him, giving him a hard look, but he stared back at her, his eyes meeting hers unabashedly. “But right now, my wishes are still the highest order, and until that has changed, my word will remain final.”
Her smile deepened, growing even more menacing, as she continued. “With all due respect,
tracker
,
perhaps you care too much for her wishes and too little for her duties.” His expression faltered momentarily, but he quickly met her eyes again. “Was it not your duty to inform her of the specifics of the christening and have her completely ready for tomorrow?”
“It was,” Finn replied without any trace of shame.
“It seems you have failed, as well,” Elora surmised. “I’m beginning to question how exactly you’ve been filling your time with the Princess. Has any of it been spent on training?”
Suddenly, Rhys knocked over a glass of wine. The glass shattered and liquid splattered everywhere. Everyone had been too busy staring at Elora and Finn, but out of the corner of my eye, I saw him do it on purpose.
Rhys started apologizing and rushing about to clean it up, but Elora had stopped glaring at Finn, and he no longer had to defend himself. Rhys had come to his rescue, and I couldn’t be more relieved.
After the mess was cleaned up, Willa, who had never been that fond of Rhys, suddenly began chatting incessantly with him, and he eagerly reciprocated. They talked just so that Elora and Finn couldn’t.
Elora still managed to squeeze in a few biting comments towards me, such as “really, Princess, you must know how to use a fork.” But as soon as she had finished her sentence, Willa would pipe up with a funny story about this girl she knew or this movie she saw or this place she went. It was endless, and in general, we were all grateful.
When dinner was over, Elora claimed she had a migraine brewing and a million things to do for tomorrow. She apologized that dessert would not be served tonight, but she didn’t leave her seat at the head of the table. Unsure of what else to do, everybody started to excuse themselves. Garrett suggested that they should be heading out, and she nodded noncommittally.
“I will see you tomorrow evening,” Elora replied hollowly. She stared into space instead of looking at him, and he tried not to look troubled by this.
“Take care of yourself,” Garrett said, touching her shoulder gently.
Finn, Rhys, and I rose to see Garrett, Willa, and Rhiannon to the door, but Elora’s voice stopped me cold. I think it stopped everyone else, too, but they did a better job of playing it off.
“Finn?” Elora said flatly, still staring off at nothing. “Would you escort me to my drawing room? I’d like to have a word with you.”
“Yes, of course,” Finn replied, giving her a small bow.
I froze and looked to him, but he refused to look at me. He just stood stoically, hands crossed behind his back, and waited for Elora to ask for further assistance.
I might’ve stood there until Elora commanded me to go, but Willa looped her arm through mine and started to drag me away. I wanted to hate her for it, but I knew she was just saving me from another of Elora’s tirades.
Rhys and Rhiannon were just ahead of us, whispering quietly to each other. Garrett stole one last glance at Elora and walked on to the front door.
“So, I’ll come over about ten tomorrow morning,” Willa said, purposely keeping her tone light and cheery.
“What for?” I asked, feeling somewhat dazed.
“To help you get ready. There is
so
much to do!” Willa said, and then shot a look in the direction of the dining room. “And your mother doesn’t seem to be the helpful type.”
“Willa, don’t talk bad about the Queen,” Garrett said without conviction.
“Well, anyway, I’ll be over to help you with everything. You’ll be fabulous.” She gave me a reassuring smile and squeezed my arm.
“Thanks.” I wanted to smile at her, but I couldn’t make it work.
I was genuinely relieved to have her helping me, but a sick feeling grew inside of me. Whatever Elora was saying to Finn, it couldn’t be good. Garrett flashed me an unconvincing smile, then they disappeared out the door, leaving Rhys and I standing in the entryway.
“You okay?” Rhys asked.
“Yeah, I’m fine,” I lied.
I felt oddly shaky and ill, and I was pretty sure that I didn’t want to be a Princess anymore. There weren’t many more dinners like this I could handle. I took a step away, preparing to tell Elora just that, but I felt Rhys’s hand warm on my arm, stopping me.
“If you go in there, you’ll just make it worse,” Rhys insisted gently. “Come on.”
He put his hand on the small of my back and ushered me over to the stairs. When we reached them, I expected him to try to push me up the stairs to my room, but he didn’t. He knew that I had to wait for Finn and find out what happened.
I peered over the railing, hoping to catch a glimpse of something. I’m not sure what that would help, but I thought if I could just
see
what was happening, I could somehow make it okay.
“That was a rough dinner,” Rhys said with a joyless laugh and sat down on the steps. I couldn’t see anything, so I gave up. Pulling my skirt underneath me, I sat on the stairs next to him.
“I’m sorry,” I said.
“Don’t be sorry. It wasn’t your fault,” Rhys assured me with his lopsided grin. “You just made this house a whole lot more interesting.”
Elora had purposely made that spectacle public. Otherwise, she would’ve said it privately, inside Finn’s head. For some reason, she had wanted me to witness that. I didn’t understand what exactly he had done wrong, except disagree with her. But he had been respectful and hadn’t said anything that wasn’t true.
“What do you think she’s saying?” I asked.
“I don’t know,” Rhys said. “She’s never really yelled at me.”
“You’ve got to be kidding,” I stared at him skeptically. Rhys behaved like a kid that had gotten in trouble a lot in his life, and Elora was about as strict as they came.
“No, seriously,” Rhys laughed at my shock. “She’s snapped at me to knock stuff off when she’s around me, but do you know how often she’s even around? I was raised by nannies. Elora made it perfectly clear from day one that she wasn’t my mother, and she never wanted to be.”
“Did she ever want to be a mother at all?” What little I knew of her seemed to be lacking even the slightest bit of maternal instinct.
“Honestly?” Rhys debated whether or not to tell me, before sadly replying, “No. I don’t think she did. But she had a lineage to carry on. A duty.”
“I’m just part of her job,” I muttered bitterly. “For once, I just wish that somebody actually wanted me around.”
“Oh, come on, Wendy,” Rhys admonished me softly and leaned in closer to me. “Lots of people want you around.” His blue eyes searched over me, so I swallowed hard and looked down at the floor. “You can’t take it personally that Elora’s a bitch.” Rhys looked away, and I felt an odd combination of relief and disappointment
“It’s a little hard not to.” I fidgeted with my dress. “She’s my mother.”
“Elora is a strong, complicated woman that you and I can’t even begin to understand,” Rhys explained tiredly. “She is a Queen above all else, and that makes her cold and distant and cruel.”
“What was it like growing up with that?” I glanced over at him.
“I don’t know.” He shrugged. “Probably like growing up in a boarding school with a strict headmistress. She was always lurking in the background, and I knew that she had the final say on everything. But her interaction with me was at an absolute minimum.” He looked at me again, this time uncertainly.
“What?”
“She’s not quite as secretive as she thinks, though. This is a big house, but I was a sneaky little kid.” He bit his lip and fiddled with a button on his blazer. “You know she used to sleep with Finn’s dad?”
“I did,” I said quietly.
“I thought he would tell you.” Rhys fell silent for a minute, chewing his lip. “Elora was in love with him. She’s strange when she’s in love. Her face is different, softer and more radiant.” Rhys shook his head, lost in a memory. “It was almost worse seeing her like that, knowing that she’s capable of kindness and generosity. It made me feel gypped that all I ever got were icy glares from across the room.”