Take Me As I Am (7 page)

Green eyes glanced up shyly and gave her a sheepish shrug. After placing the juice soaked final piece of toast in her mouth, she sat back and placed a satisfied hand on her belly.

“You obviously enjoyed that?” Jo smiled with indulgent warmth.

“Oh, yes. Lucy is a good cook and I was hungry. I haven’t eaten much since lunch yesterday.” Thea reached for her coffee cup.

“How come you never get fat eating all that? You’re such a tiny thing. If I did that on a regular basis I’d never get in my jeans,” Jo mused.

“I guess it must be my metabolism. I’ve never had a problem with eating whatever food I wanted. You don’t look like you have a problem either.” Thea stared at Jo over her coffee cup before looking away.

“That’s because I travel around a lot and don’t have the luxury of eating this well most of the time. I confess this month has given me some extra pounds.” Jo looked down at her hands.

Lucy brought more toast for Thea and gave Jo a disparaging stare after looking at the plate of partially eaten food. “You want me to take that away?”

“Well, unless Thea here will help me out. I’m not going to eat it, Lucy.”

“Sorry. I’m all full up right now.” Thea chuckled. “Another time, perhaps.”

Lucy clucked her disapproval. “Such a waste,” she muttered collecting the plates.

“So, tell me about your new fiancé?” Jo didn’t particularly want to know, but she did.

Thea now looked uncomfortable and stared over Joanna’s shoulder and sighed heavily. “I’ve known George forever, I guess. He’s been hoping that I would take up his offer of marriage for some time now. He’s the local banker and has a solid background. I could do worse.” Thea drank heavily from her coffee cup, frowning as she did.

“I was always under the impression that you married for love and not because someone has a
solid background
. Correct me if I’m wrong?” Jo couldn’t help the caustic tone that accompanied the words.

“Is that why you’re not married?”

“No, no that’s not the reason.” Jo laughed and tapped her fingers impatiently on the table.

“Do you mind telling me what the reason is?” Thea asked.

Steel blue eyes flicked across the blonde woman’s features and saw the sincerity in her expression. “No one ever asked me.”

“Really? I find that astonishing. You are so beautiful and talented. All the men in the town are raving about you. Surely you know that?”

“Ah, Thea, remember one thing about men, they think with a part of their anatomy that doesn’t see the light of day unless it needs to pee. Lust is about the only way to describe what the men here are generally feeling when they look at me.” Jo had a wry expression when she spoke. “Why are you marrying Andrews?” she asked directly.

“I know I don’t have to explain myself to you but I want you to know my reasons even if you don’t approve.” Thea sucked in a deep breath. “My father left me heavy debts and the motel is mortgaged to the hilt. The insurance company has refused to pay out on my father’s life insurance policy. I have no choice in the matter.” Thea’s voice was calm and flat.

“Why not just leave town and start again? Why marry someone you don’t love or even like.”

Thea looked down at the table and at the toast that was growing cold. “I do not have your talents for singing or anything else other than running a motel. It would appear that I’m not that good at that either.”

“Perhaps not as a singer, but I’m sure you are talented in other things.” Jo blew out an exasperated breath. “What’s wrong with the way you run the motel? Surely you can get work elsewhere.”

“No. I can’t, Joanna. I’ve never left this place. It’s the last part of my family heritage.” Thea’s eyes now glistened with tears of frustration at her own choices.

“Thea, you’re an intelligent woman and don’t need to stoop to this type of life. Who is going to benefit if you stay on at the motel? That asshole banker Andrews? You’re better than that.”

“Don’t you see? My forefathers founded the town and I owe it to the family line.”

Jo knew about family heritage. She had been born into a Greek family that believed the Greek gods themselves still had the power to affect their lives. It had annoyed her when she was young. Now, Thea was telling her the same philosophy using different words.

“I’m leaving early Saturday morning. Come with me?”

Jo shook her head.
Did I really just say that?

By the look on Thea’s face, she couldn’t believe it either. She wiped a hand across her eyes before staring back at Joanna with a shocked expression.

“Go with you,” Thea whispered.

Jo knew she was being stupid and ridiculous, but she didn’t care. From the first moment she met Thea, she knew it was important to protect her and the only way to do that was to take her with her on her travels. “Yes.” Her response was stark and full of so many possibilities, both good and bad.

Thea slowly got out of her chair, put out a hand, and touched Joanna’s shoulder. “I…I need to go. I’ll see you later.” She moved hastily out of the diner and this time Jo let her.

Not much later, Lucy came out of the kitchen, went to the table, and looked pointedly at the space that Thea had vacated. “I guess you get the check or is she coming back?” Lucy asked quietly.

Jo, trying to process what had just happened, looked up and frowned. “No, I don’t think she’ll be back.” Jo moved out of her chair and held onto the back as she felt a wave of nausea overtake her.

Lucy put an arm around her and led her gently, but swiftly to the bathroom. Jo had known her breakfast wasn’t going to stay around long.

Chapter Nine

Thea had walked back to the motel and her office without really knowing how she did so or how long it took to get there. All she remembered were the last words from her friend and protector. Joanna.

I’m leaving on Saturday morning early, come with me?

“Go with her? My God, it is like something out of a movie,” she whispered.

She was certain if she closed her eyes for any length of time the words would disappear and perhaps the woman who had voiced them also.

She stared unseeingly out the window onto the colorful flowers that adorned the yard. This garden was her pride and joy. In many senses her escape from dreary reality. She watched the breeze ruffle the leaves of the flowers. The butterflies that frequented her yard were flitting from one flower to another and appeared to sunbathe on the green leaves in the harsh glare of the full sun, their pretty wings held together in defiance of the sun’s rays. All she wanted to do now was sleep, hoping that when she awoke, all would be well with her world. She would be free to make her own choices and have none of the weight of family heritage and debts weighing her down.

The door to her office opened and Daisy tentatively walked inside, a look of horror on her face. “Thea, Thea, darling, are you all right?” Daisy walked briskly to Thea and wrapped her ample arms around her.

“I…I don’t know what to do, Daisy. I really don’t know what to do. What should I do?” Thea could feel heartfelt fear heavily weighing down on her as she melted into Daisy’s arms. The woman had been there when she was a baby and had become a mother figure when her own mother abandoned her.

“Oh, my dear, please, it’s going to be all right. When has your Daisy ever been wrong?” Daisy pulled Thea into her arms tighter in a comforting hug, rocking her gently. Thea wasn’t happy, hadn’t been in a long while, and Daisy thought she deserved happiness.

“It’s not. It’s not, Daisy. How can she ask me that question, it’s far too late.” Thea let her tears flow.

Daisy had watched the interaction between Thea who she considered a daughter and the tall stranger, who was nothing like Thea in both background and manners. It was hard to associate the two together. But it was obvious to anyone who cared to notice that their relationship was a strong bond. What type of relationship exactly was developing could be cause for speculation. Whatever it was, it had set in stone and neither one of them looked happy about the events currently taking shape around them.

“Why not tell me what she asked you and perhaps I can help?” Daisy gently tipped up the tear-stained face and smiled encouragingly at her.

Thea gulped several times and then gave a weak watery smile and nodded. “She’s leaving and asked me to go with her,” Thea said tearfully. “What shall I do, Daisy?”

Daisy gave her a rueful glance and smiled gently back at the face she loved. She was such a sweet child and it was heartbreaking to see her troubled so. “What does your heart tell you to do, child?”

“My mind tells me I must marry George Andrews. My roots tell me I must marry George Andrews. My financial situation tells me I must marry George Andrews.” Thea spoke as if she was speaking to herself rather than the woman at her side.

“But what does your heart tell you, Thea?” Daisy prompted her again.

“My heart tells me to accept Joanna’s offer and leave with her and forget everything I have grown up with and feel comfortable with. To be a free spirit just like Joanna and travel and find my true path in life.” Thea lifted her head and looked at Daisy with a wrinkled forehead. “Can it be that simple, Daisy?”

“Yes, it can.” Daisy grinned at the flowery description, but she could see the happiness the words brought to Thea’s face. It transformed it. Anyone who thought Joanna was bad for Thea, her expression alone would convince them that she was the opposite. “I think you have your answer, my child. I think the earlier you tell George the better. Don’t you think so?” Daisy coaxed the younger woman to look at her directly.

“I could just leave with Joanna and let him find out that way.” Thea sighed heavily at the unwelcome prospect of telling George she wasn’t going to marry him.

Daisy raised an eyebrow at the comment. “I never had you down as a coward, Thea.”

“True, I have more of a backbone than that.”

“Perhaps you should tell your friend that you’re going with her. When she walked in here a few minutes ago she looked deathly pale to me.” Daisy had watched the woman slowly come into the motel entrance, glance quickly around, and grimace at the coffee happily brewing. That was a first. She then turned the color of Thea’s eyes and headed for her room.

Thea turned concerned eyes toward the older woman. “Did Joanna look ill or just upset?”

Daisy patted her arm and smiled briefly. “Why not go and check on your friend and see for yourself. Then clear up the matter of your broken engagement.”

Daisy chuckled as Thea rushed out of the room. “Well, I know what type of relationship those two could end up in by the way Thea ran out of here. The whole situation is quite romantic if it didn’t have George Andrews sitting in the middle of it.”

†

Thea could feel a sense of peace as if her soul had escaped its chains and was soaring free to meet whatever challenges the world threw in her path as she rapped gently on the door of room five. She waited impatiently for Joanna to open it but nothing happened. She knocked again tempted to barge in as she had once before.
God, was it only two days ago?
For her it seemed like a lifetime and that she had known Joanna forever.

Thea knocked again and shouted, “Joanna.” With each passing moment, she was becoming increasingly frustrated. Perhaps Daisy had been wrong and Joanna had only come into the motel briefly and left again.

Is she gone for good or is she just doing laundry? Maybe she is visiting John-Henry, or maybe she’s with that man from last night.

Her last thought galvanized her into action she placed her passkey in the door, and opened it quietly before stepping inside.

“Joanna? Joanna, are you here?” she asked from the doorway. When she heard a low moan, her heart rate increased. Was Joanna ill? She walked swiftly forward before seeing her friend spread-eagled on the king-sized bed. Her shirt was off and she was only wearing brief panties. She was lying on her stomach and the smooth back that came into view was like looking at creamy, blemish-free silk. Thea wondered what it would feel like to touch Joanna. Shaking her head from the thoughts that seemed to invade her mind when she was in close proximity to Joanna, she knelt at the front of the bed as close as possible to Joanna’s head.

“Joanna, are you sick? Do you need a doctor?”

Joanna peered blearily and groaned a little louder but still didn’t say anything.

Thea was now very concerned. Joanna appeared drawn, pale, and the bloodshot eyes didn’t help. Thea had noticed them earlier, but hadn’t thought it fit to mention that in light of the tentative conversation between them.

“I’ll get a doctor, Joanna. Please let me cover you up, you’re shaking.” Thea tugged at the edge of the sheet under Joanna and was surprised at how easily the sheet came free in her hands.

The movement of the sheet and Thea’s words seemed to finally penetrate Joanna’s sub-conscious because she turned her head toward her coming within inches of contact.

“Thea, it’s okay. I’m okay. I have a hangover.” Joanna held her head and gave Thea a tight smile.

Thea gazed into the bloodshot eyes. “Hangover? You have a hangover?”

Joanna gave her another feeble smile. “Yeah, I kinda tied one over on myself last night. Sorry you thought I was sick.”

Thea couldn’t believe it. So possibly, all that Joanna had said earlier was probably not any more real than just something to forget once the hangover was gone. “I see. Well, I guess I’ll leave you to your hangover then.” Thea was feeling like a fool.

“Thea, what is it?” Joanna moved closer.

Thea stiffened when Joanna’s naked breasts brushed up against the fabric of her cotton shirt. Breathing had suddenly become increasingly difficult. She was annoyed at herself, at Joanna, and now her body that was once again showing signs of uncontrollable feelings.

What’s going on with me? I need her as a friend, not a romantic interest. Besides she wouldn’t entertain that idea…she likes men.

Thea closed her eyes to ward of the chaotic thoughts that trespassed on her mind and body. The beautiful woman pressed with unconcerned ease against her body increased the tempo of her heart.

Could she hear that?

“I thought you were sick and needed the doctor. I’m very sorry for disturbing you. I seem to make a habit of invading your privacy without permission.” The words tumbled past Thea’s lips unabated.

She wanted to hear Joanna once again ask her to go with her on her travels, but she dared not ask and tempt the fates. While she didn’t know if Joanna had been genuine in her request, she still had hope and that would give her the strength to see George and terminate their business deal. That’s all it was could ever be for she didn’t like men that way.

“You never disturb me, Thea. Thank you for your concern. I appreciate it,” Joanna murmured.

Thea smiled at her shyly. “I guess I’ll go and get on with things then. Are you sure you don’t need anything?” Their eyes locked for several seconds and it seemed to Thea that an undecipherable message passed between them.

“Yeah, I need to sleep it off, that’s all. I’ll catch up with you later. Would you have dinner with me early? Around six,” Joanna whispered.

Thea heard the gentle question and it brought her senses out of hiding and soaring like an eagle in the sky. “Sure. I have some business to take care of this morning and then I’m free the rest of the day. If you want, we can have coffee any time.”

Joanna grimaced. “Business?”

“Yes, business.” Thea looked away and attempted to move from the vicinity of Joanna. However, the woman seemed to get a new lease of life. She quickly put a hand out and grasped Thea’s chin turning her face back so that they were mere inches away from one another.

“Do you need a protector for this business?” Joanna asked in earnest.

Thea smiled at the warmth flowing through Joanna’s fingers as she unconsciously smoothed the planes of Thea’s face with the tips. “Are you offering your services as protector to me again?” Thea couldn’t help the heat that traveled into her cheeks at the soft caresses.

“I guess I am. Would you like to take me up on the offer?”

“How about you sleep and take me to dinner later.” Thea grinned. “I’ll be fine.”

Joanna smiled as a tinge of color resurfaced and she withdrew her fingers. “Yeah. Okay. If you’re sure.”

“I am.”

“Then I’ll catch up with you later. I have laundry to do anyway. Can’t have me going around naked, can we?” she replied jovially.

Thea chuckled at the thought and turned away quickly, Naked indeed.

She never seems to be in all her clothes whenever I’m around.

Then again, her bedroom was her domain and she probably didn’t expect visitors. “No, that we can’t. See you later and if you need me, just call.” Thea moved away from the bed and the beautiful woman sprawled out on it.

“I will. Oh and, Thea?”

“Yes?” Thea had her hand on the door and waited for the question before she opened it.

“I meant what I said earlier. Will you come with me when I leave?” Joanna looked up at the ceiling.

Thea couldn’t help the smile that crossed her face. She wanted to go back and hug Joanna, but it wasn’t the time or place. That might be misconstrued in her current state of dress. “Yes,” she said in a quiet but decisive tone before proceeding out the door.

†

Jo continued to stare at the ceiling. She was stunned.

Did she say yes?

Had Thea really said yes? Thea had said yes.

With that clear picture in her mind, Jo closed her eyes and although still feeling drained, tired with a sledgehammer working on her temples, she closed her eyes. A quiet joy filled her as sleep claimed her. Her dreamscape of green eyes that had once seemed to glow from a faceless person now had a visage and it was very welcoming to behold.

†

Thea had never felt this alive in all her twenty-nine years and it was all to do with her lone guest at the motel—Joanna. She was eternally grateful to whoever was looking out for her to have the woman enter her life at this stage. It could have been too late had she turned up a few weeks later.

With a determined walk, she went toward the bank, unable to stop the happy grin plastered on her face. She entered the bank and smiled at the teller who gave her a quizzical look. It was rare that she ever set foot in the bank. George always visited her personally to deal with her account.

“Ms. Danvers, it’s wonderful to see you. Congratulations on your engagement to Mr. Andrews. I hope you will be very happy,” Ted Wassle, the teller, said.

Thea sneered inwardly knowing that everyone in town knew that George Andrews used his business rather than his personal attributes to get that result. “Thank you, Mr. Wassle. I wonder perhaps if Mr. Andrews is in and if he could spare me a few minutes.” Thea smiled at the teller, who had worked in the bank for as long as she could remember.