Tanner's War (5 page)

Chapter Seven

By the time Beth stopped
speaking,
Tanner was ready to kill someone. He balled his
hands into fists, fighting the urge to slam them into the bricks. He had to
wait a few seconds before he spoke, not trusting himself not to start yelling.

"So this Nathaniel guy
..."

"One of Abram's sons,"
Beth said. She was still staring ahead, unfocused. There was a soft pain in her
voice, as if she was remembering something horrible. Tanner wanted to take it away
from her. More than wanted—
needed
. He didn't want to hear that aching,
or see the angst on her face.

"Motherfuckers," he said.
His body trembled with violence. He'd been here before, too many times. This
was the trouble Nash accused him of borrowing, this rage that boiled away all
common sense. But he couldn't help it.
Couldn't stop it.
The whole time Beth talked, he'd been picturing his sister, Melissa, bloodied
and weeping and begging Tanner to help her.

He snapped and smashed his fist
into the wall with a yell. The abrasive shock of pain was almost refreshing.
Beth yelped and jumped away from him, almost cowering, and Tanner's anger was
doused immediately.

"Oh fuck, Beth, no. I'm not
gonna
hurt you." He reached for her, but she shied
away. He bit his lip, fighting frustration. After what she'd been through, how
she'd lived, of course she was going to be scared. "I'm sorry," he
offered. "I just ... I need ..." He needed to fight, that was what he
needed. Drain the wildness from his system. He heaved a deep sigh. "Are
they
gonna
keep coming after you, these Church
bastards?"

Beth nodded. "I think so. It's
a question of pride. Abram won't be shamed before the Church." She hugged
herself, shivering. "Perhaps ... If you'd be kind enough to give me a ride
somewhere ..."

"No!" He didn't mean to
yell again, but there was just no fucking way he was dumping her somewhere.
"No, Beth, no way. You can't run from shit like them. You can't let them
beat you."

"What choice do I have? I've
got nothing, nobody—"

He whirled round and grabbed her by
the shoulders, pulling her hard against his chest. She gave a little gasp,
staring up at him with wide, tear-filled eyes. "You've got me now,"
he said, an unexpected fierceness rising in him. Before he could think better
of it, he kissed her.

It was probably a mistake. But
fuck, she felt good in his arms. She melted into him, opening herself to his
possessive kiss and pressing her soft body against him eagerly. He wrapped his
arms around her, lifting her off her feet in his need to get as much of her as
possible. She tasted sweet and fresh, and his cock hardened as he wondered if
her cunt tasted as good as her lips. The thought spurred him to kiss her
harder, deeper, sweeping his tongue over hers, then biting her lip. She
moaned—half pain, half encouragement, but the sound cut through some of
Tanner's blind lust.

"Shit," he said,
releasing her abruptly. "I shouldn't have done that."

Her face crumpled and he realized
too late how callous that sounded. He thumped the wall with less force, and ran
his hands over his face, trying to compose himself.

It wasn't easy. His cock was
throbbing and his whole body felt hot and tight, wired for action. Beth stared
at him with a mixture of hope and shame on her face, and all he wanted to do
was snatch her back into his arms and start kissing her again.
For starters, anyway.
Everything else he wanted to do to her
...Well, fuck. She probably hadn't heard of half the things he wanted to do to
her.

"Don't you want me?" she
asked, voice breaking.

Well shit. Of course he wanted her.
Look at her. Sweet hips, hot tits, lush lips. Who wouldn't want her? But not
like this, with her drunk and vulnerable.

"I didn't mean it like
that," he said, reaching for her. "I just mean, you're ... you know
... And I'm ... you know ..." Shit. What was it about her that made him so
damn tongue-tied?

"I don't know," she said,
hugging
herself
again and turning away from him
slightly. “Don’t do things like that if you don’t mean them.”

“I did mean it. It just probably
wasn’t very appropriate.”

There was a touch of bitterness in
Beth’s laugh that he didn’t like. “Do you always worry about what’s
appropriate?”

“No,” he admitted. Well, this was
going really fucking badly, wasn’t it? He laced his fingers behind his head and
kicked at the scuffed boards on the porch, wishing he could go join the fights
he knew were happening not far from here. Nash had him on probation though. No
getting back in the cage until his actual probation was over. Tanner had tried
to persuade him otherwise, but he’d realized that all his arguments made him
sound like a teenager screaming
you’re
not my real dad
and gave up out of embarrassment.

But fuck it, he needed to fight
tonight. It was an itch under his skin that would just get hotter and hotter
the more he ignored it. He was tuned up all wrong, what with finding Beth,
laying out that creep at Mia’s, and now that kiss. It was either fight or fuck,
and the only woman he wanted to fuck … He glanced at Beth. She looked torn
between bolting and throwing herself at him. He could have her, he knew that.
Their kiss told him that. She might be innocent and scared, but she was
electric in his arms. It would be really fucking sick of him though, wouldn’t
it? She’d been assaulted, sexually and physically, in the past twenty-four
hours by men she’d known all her life.
For Tanner to take her
now, when she was hurting and vulnerable …Yeah.
Not okay.

“Maybe I should go back to bed,”
Beth said, running her fingers through her hair. “That beer’s hitting me pretty
hard.” She managed a weak smile.

Tanner didn’t want her to go. He
wanted her to stay out here, even if they did nothing, said nothing. He wanted
to know she was right by his side, safe and … and
his
. He groaned. “Yeah,” he said, “please go to bed. If you stay
out here, I’m going to do something really inappropriate.”

He didn’t watch her go, certain
he’d see hurt or shame on her face and equally certain he couldn’t take that.
He’d grab her, kiss her rough and hard, and make her belong to him. And that
would be no better than what the motherfucker back at the Church had wanted to
do.

He heard the mill door open and
close, and then
open
again. He turned to tell her to
go, only to find himself facing Wolf, the newest patch holder of the MC. The
tip of Wolf’s cigarette glowed in the darkness, giving Tanner an instant
craving. “Spare one?” he asked.

Wolf offered him a roll-up. The
old-rope scent of his tobacco wiped out the sweet smell of Beth, and Tanner
felt a little of his tension slide away. Not enough, not nearly enough, but it
helped.

“You okay, man?” Wolf came to lean
against the wall next to him. “Rattler said you had lady troubles.”

“Fuck Rattler and his big fucking
mouth. He doesn’t know a goddamn thing, as usual.” Tanner clenched his fists
and wondered if Wolf would go a few rounds with him. The other guy was a mean
fighter and he liked to brawl just for the hell of it.
Didn’t
have to be anything official, just two guys throwing down for fun.
“You
heading down to the cages tonight?” he asked him.

Wolf shrugged. “Got no plans,” he
said in his faded Cajun drawl. “Figured I’d just smoke a joint and call it a
night, to be honest.”

Tanner cracked his bloodied
knuckles. “
Wanna
earn that smoke? Throw down a little
first?”

Wolf cocked his head to one side.
“What’s on your mind, brother?”

“Does there have to be anything?
Just got some nervous energy to burn.”
Tanner rolled his
shoulders. “What’s up? Scared you’ll lose?”

Wolf grinned slowly. He took a long
drag on his cigarette and tossed it away.
“All right.
Let’s go.”

Tanner threw his own smoke away and
followed Wolf down the steps and onto the gravel. The bikes and trucks made a
rough, natural ring for them, and there was enough light cast from the windows
of the mill that he could see Wolf’s feral smile as they squared off.

Tanner didn’t think of himself as a
violent man. You could justify anything to yourself if you really wanted to. He
didn’t enjoy fighting because he liked pain and punishment; he liked the
exercise and the competition. He wasn’t angry because his dad abandoned him and
his mom couldn’t cope; he was just a live-wire
kinda
guy, full of … yeah … nervous energy. He didn’t like the crunch of his fist in
someone else’s face because he was a bad guy; he liked righting wrongs, meting
out justice. And he was always justified. There was always some reason it was
okay to hit the other guy. At least with Wolf and in the cages, the reason was
that they’d agreed to it.

Wolf was fast and wiry, smaller
than Tanner, but deceptively vicious. He didn’t give Tanner time to warm up or
get the measure of him, no feints or testing jabs. He just spat in the dirt and
launched himself, driving his fist into Tanner’s gut. Tanner staggered back and
replied with an uppercut, aiming for Wolf’s jaw but catching him in the
shoulder when Wolf dodged. Tanner immediately swung in with his other fist and
slammed it into Wolf’s stomach. When Wolf doubled over, gasping for air, Tanner
brought his elbow down on the top of his head.

Wolf landed on his ass, but jumped
up quickly, shaking it off. “Elbows are illegal, dude.”

“You see a referee?” Tanner bounced
on his heels, fists up to guard his face. “Come on, man, you’re slow tonight.
Wore
yourself
out on some pussy?”

Wolf laughed.
“Wore
some pussy out, more like.
And once I’ve handed your ass to you, I’ll go
start over on some fresh pussy while you cry in the mud.”

Then the real fight started. No
more quips or banter, just the grind and grit of fists smacking flesh, boots to
ribs,
fingers
to eyes. Bloody, messy, and raw as hell.
Tanner lost himself in the brutality of it, no longer seeing Wolf, his brother,
but just a body to pound. And Wolf gave as
good
as he
got. Every jab, every kick, every gouge, Wolf matched Tanner. It was like
draining poisoned blood, Tanner always thought.

He didn’t know how long they
fought. Probably only ten, fifteen minutes really, but the time stretched out
until he could feel every blow, every drop of blood and sweat right down in his
bones. His stamina was good, but he was rusty and Wolf was wearing him down.
When Wolf came in for a shot to his face, Tanner dodged and caught the other
man’s fist, twisting his arm behind his back in a quick, sharp move that left
Wolf trapped and tapping out.

“Don’t break my fucking arm, man,”
Wolf said through gritted teeth. “I am planning on getting in the cages sooner
or later.”

“Give?” Tanner gave his arm one
good yank to make sure Wolf was really quitting. Wolf yelped and slapped
Tanner’s thigh with his free hand.

“I give.”

Tanner released him. They were both
panting for breath, shoulders heaving, and sweat dripping down their faces.
Tanner’s lip was cut and he wiped the blood away as he dropped down on the
porch. Adrenaline oozed out of him in a heavy surge, leaving him both tired and
energized. It was a strange combination, one you only got from a good fuck or a
good fight. Wolf sat down next to him, massaging his arm.

“Feel better for that?” he asked.

Tanner shrugged. He did, mostly,
but nothing had changed while he was slugging Wolf. “Got that
joint
?”

Wolf lit up and for a couple of
minutes they smoked in silence, passing the joint back and forth. In the
darkness, with the warmth and light of the mill behind him, Tanner felt
something close to peaceful. The weed helped, but it was more than that. It was
the same feeling he’d gotten when he first left prison and came home. It was
just …
home
.
His
family at his back.
He wondered if Beth had ever had that feeling.

“You’re not bad for being so out of
practice,” Wolf said, breaking the silence. “When’s Nash letting you back in
the cages?”

“As soon as I prove I’m not looking
to get put away again,” Tanner said, trying not to sound bitter.

Wolf chuckled. “The big man’s
playing father figure, is he?”

“Not even that. More like moral
panic facilitator.”

“Big words.”

Tanner socked him in the arm, not
really trying to hurt him. “I know he’s all about keeping our noses clean and
staying under the radar, but fuck me, I don't need a babysitter. He needs to
chill about some things.”

“Big man’s got some big skeletons,”
Wolf said. He sound thoughtful, not a state Tanner usually associated him with.
“Could be fun to go through his closet, huh?”

Tanner shook his head. Everyone was
entitled to their secrets. Whatever secrets Nash kept, Tanner wasn’t interested
in unearthing them.