Targeted (Firebrand Book 1) (19 page)

Then there was the problem of how the future was going to play out with Max. Should he know the truth about his father, and if he did, would he accept it or be angry that he hadn’t been told years earlier. He and Lainey had a lot of decisions to make when this threat to their lives was resolved.

He turned and walked around the building to the meditation garden and eased down on one of the benches there. In his heart he knew he and Lainey needed to work together to give their son the best life he could have. If he knew that, then why did every conversation they had dissolve into an argument?

He leaned forward, propped his elbow on his knees, and buried his face in his hands. He didn’t know how long he’d sat that way until he felt a hand on his shoulder. Colt Hanson stood beside him, staring down.

“Are you okay?”

Ash straightened up and scooted over for Colt to sit down. “Yeah, just a bit tired. These last few days have been rough.”

Colt took off the Australian bush hat that he always wore and laid it on the bench beside him. “Sorry I wasn’t here to help out sooner, but I needed to wrap up some loose ends with John in Washington, but he kept me informed on what was going on. He’s doing everything he can to find Eduardo Diaz.”

“Yeah, I know. It’s just hard. I feel like I’m in the calm center of a hurricane just waiting for next blast to come.”

“Well, it’s plain to see that this whole thing has you tied up in knots. At first I thought it was the murders that had you so antsy. Then I realized it was something else, and it has to do with Lainey. It’s not hard to feel how the atmosphere takes on a sudden chill when the two of you are in the same room. I thought you were trying to be civil to each other. Has something happened to change that?”

A snort of disgust rumbled in Ash’s throat. “I guess you could call it that. I read some letters my brother left me, and I got the surprise of my life.”

Colt’s eyebrows lifted. “Oh?”

Ash inhaled deeply. “I found out the reason Lainey married Richard. She was pregnant with my child, and I had disappeared into that jungle where we were training.”

Colt’s mouth gaped open. “Then that means that Max. . .”

“Is my son, not Richard’s,” Ash finished for him. “She said they tried to find me, but Richard was told my whereabouts were classified.”

Colt nodded. “That’s right. They told us before we left to let our families know there would be no contact with us for a year. Did you do that?”

Ash’s face grew warm. “I think we might have mentioned it that last night when you and Reese had dinner with Lainey and me. But when I went to talk to my father, our conversation ended up like it always did. I stormed out of the house and went to Lainey’s. She didn’t want an explanation about why I’d decided to go, and she sure didn’t mention that she was pregnant.”

Colt looked stunned. “But why not?” 
      

Ash’s stomach roiled at the memory of their last time together. “When I went to tell her I was leaving with you and Reese, I knew something was wrong. I should have insisted she tell me, but I didn’t. That argument with my father had left me angry, and I was determined to show him I could do whatever I wanted. I wouldn’t listen to anything Lainey had to say, and now look what it’s cost all of us. Maybe I don’t deserve to have a son like Max.”

Colt didn’t say anything for a moment. Then he reached up and clamped a hand down on Ash’s shoulder. “It must have been hard to hear that you’d had a son you didn’t know about all these years.”

“Yeah, it was. If I had known, I would have taken care of her and the baby.”

Colt regarded him with a searching stare. “How would you have done that, Ash? Would you have given her money to live on, or would you have sacrificed your own plans to be the father in your unborn child’s life? Would you have been willing to take care of him and Lainey every day as Richard did? Would you have given up Firebrand?”

Ash jumped to his feet and glared at Reese. “That’s not fair.”

“And why not? Is it easier to blame Lainey and Richard than it is to take responsibility for the choices you made?”

“But they deceived me,” Ash insisted..

“Did they?” Colt asked.

As soon as Colt had spoken, the words in Richard’s letter flashed in his mind. My actions were as much for you as for her.

In a sudden flash of understanding he knew what his brother had meant. Richard had seen Lainey’s mental state and knew the safety of the baby she carried was in question. By helping Lainey, Richard had assured the survival of his brother’s son. And then when he could have chosen to take the secret to the grave with him, he’d given the boy he’d raised back to the brother he’d always loved.

Ash’s pulse quickened at the guilt he suddenly felt for how he’d told Lainey he wasn’t joining Firebrand, that he was offering her the life she’d always wanted. Then he had broken his promises to her when he selfishly took the route he wanted without giving her a say so in it. In so doing, he had abandoned Lainey and his child when they’d needed him.

He swallowed to clear his throat. “I made some mistakes, Colt, and Lainey hates me for it.” He sank back on the bench and faced Colt. “I want to be in Max’s life, but Lainey thinks I’ll hurt him like I did her. I want to show her I’m not going to do that, but instead all I do is argue with her. That convinces her more than ever that I’ll never measure up to Richard, that I’m a failure like my father always said I was.”

Colt stared at him a moment before he shook his head. “You’re not a failure, Ash, except maybe in your own mind. I don’t know anything about your relationship with your father, but I know the kind of man you are. I’ve seen you in action, and because of you many people are alive today. Don’t ever forget that.”

“But you’re talking about the missions we’ve completed successfully. That’s not the case here.”

Colt’s unwavering stare made Ash blink. “Really? It seems to me you have a mission of a different sort right now. I’ve only been back a short time, and I’ve seen the way you look at Lainey when she’s not noticing. I suspect you still have some feelings for her. If you do, think about what will make her and Max happy, and then show her that’s what you want. That’s probably why your brother told you about Max. He wanted the two of you to take care of him.”

Ash nodded his head. “He did ask me to take care of them.”

“Then that’s what you need to do, no matter what it costs you. You and Lainey share a child, and you need to find a way to make that work whether or not you ever have a better relationship with her or not.”

Ash pressed his hands to the sides of his head and groaned. “Tell me what to do, Colt.”

“I can’t tell you that. The only thing I can tell you is that you have a son, and you need to begin thinking about how you’re going to be a father to him.”

Ash took a deep breath and nodded. “You’re right, and maybe I can convince Lainey that she doesn’t have to worry about me hurting Max.”

Colt slapped him on the back and pushed to his feet. “You can do it, buddy. Now let’s go to supper.”

Ash took a deep breath and stood to face Colt. “Sometimes I wonder if Firebrand has been worth it, Colt.”

The muscle in Colt’s cheek flexed, and he shoved his hands in his pockets. “I know what you mean. It hasn’t been good for the relationships in our lives.”

Ash was hesitant to broach his next question, but the pain in his friend’s eyes made him speak. “Do you ever hear from Sloan?”

Colt shook his head. “Not for a while now. I found her in San Antonio a few years ago and went to see her, but it didn’t work out. She told me she couldn’t take the pressure of loving someone who lived the life I did, and she wanted to get as far away from Firebrand as she could. She told me she didn’t want to ever see me again. I don’t have any idea where she is now.”

Ash stared off into the distance before he spoke. “We’ve both paid a big price for serving our country, haven’t we?”

Colt nodded. “We sure have. But like I said, it’s important to remember we’ve helped a lot of people in the process. I’m thankful that our work hasn’t been in vain.”

“Me, too.”

“So,” Colt said, “ready to eat?”

“You go on. I’ll be there in a few minutes.”

Colt picked up his hat and glanced at his watch. “Okay, about fifteen minutes and Pete will be dishing out the food. Better not be late. You know how cantankerous he can be.”

Ash laughed at the thought of the wiry, little cook Reese had hired. He didn’t take any lip from the guys and his expertise as a chef was unparalleled by any other Ash had ever known. His stomach growled in anticipation of what Pete had cooked for them tonight. “I’ll be on time.”

He sat there for a few minutes after Colt left thinking about what he had said. It sounded easy when you were talking about it, but convincing Lainey he wouldn’t do anything to hurt Max wasn’t going to be simple. After a few minutes he sighed and pushed to his feet. There was no better time than the present to begin. He’d ask Lainey if they could talk after supper.

With a new determination, he turned toward the administration building but had only taken a few steps when his cell phone chimed for an incoming text message. He pulled the phone from his pocket and clicked on the message from an unknown caller.

A  groan escaped his mouth as he read the message.
I was sorry we didn’t have more time to talk at the school, but I’ll be seeing you soon. Maybe at the Firebrand Training Center. Tell Max hello for me. You must be very proud to have such a great son. Eve

For a moment, he stood still, staring at the message. So Eve did know that Max was his son. A cold chill ran up Ash’s spine. If she knew, then Diaz did also. He’d wondered since the beginning why anyone would target them since Ash hadn’t had any contact with Lainey in ten years. But Diaz had wanted him to come home to find out he had a son, and then he wanted Ash to see him die.

His happiness at the thought of being a father was replaced with terror. So far Diaz had been toying with him like a cat with a mouse. But he sensed things were about to get more dangerous for all of them.

Ash took a deep breath and squared his shoulders. He wasn’t about to find out he had a son only to lose him. He touched the gun in the holster at his waist, let his gaze travel across the grounds of the facility, and gritted his teeth.
      

He needed to go inside. His family was there, and he intended to do whatever it took to keep them safe.

<><><>

Lainey placed the last paper in the stack that William had brought her and sighed in relief. “Have I signed them all?”

William reached for the documents, shuffled them into a stack, and stuck them in his briefcase. “You have. I’m sorry I had to bother you with this, but there’s too much at stake with the release of our new product just weeks away for us to leave any loopholes at this point.”

“I know, William, and I’m thankful to have you in charge of everything at the office while I’m gone.”

His gaze drifted around the conference room, and a smile tugged at the corner of his mouth. “I’ve been telling you that you need to get away for a few days, but I didn’t have this in mind. I was thinking more of you relaxing on a beach somewhere. Not a place like this. From the way those guards at the main gate acted, I thought I must be entering Ft. Knox. Not only did they search me, but they went over every inch of my car.”

Lainey chuckled and leaned back in her chair. “Don’t take it personally. They’re only doing their job by protecting everyone who’s here. Now that they know who you are they probably won’t do that again.”

A frown puckered his forehead, and he shook his head. “I don’t know what’s going on with you right now, Lainey, but I know it must not be good. Not if it was serious enough for Ash to bring you and Max out here. And not if the safety of the people here require trained guerrillas guarding the gates. I went to work for Richard and Ash’s father thirty years ago, and those boys are like sons to me. You and Max are family, too. I want to help you anyway I can. Can’t you tell me what’s going on?”

Lainey stared at the man who had been at her side counseling and guiding her since Richard’s death, and for the first time she noticed that he was beginning to age. His hair was no longer the dark brown it had once been. Instead it was sprinkled with gray, and wrinkles had begun to plough their furrows down his face.

He had been her confidant in every business matter, and she wanted to answer his question truthfully, but the memory of the two men in her bedroom stopped her. The fewer people who knew the better.

She reached out and squeezed William’s hand. “It’s nothing for you to worry about. I’m sure Max and I will be home before too long. Then I can explain everything. In the meantime, keep things going at DeHan Enterprises and keep me informed if I need to be involved.”

William sighed, pushed to his feet, and picked up his briefcase. “All right. I’ll stay in touch.” He glanced at his watch. “I didn’t realize it’s getting so late. I need to be heading back to St. Claire.”

Lainey stood and followed him to the door. “Stay and eat supper with us. It should be ready soon.”

He opened the door, and they stepped into the hallway. “I wish I could, but I have a lot of work to do before bedtime. I’m sure my housekeeper left me something to eat.”