Temporary Master (17 page)

After
the hostess left, Ethan took a sip of his water. “Remember, Sabella, anytime
you want the status quo between us to change - all you have to do is ask.”

To
keep from begging for what she knew would lead to a situation, one which would
be dangerous to her
heart,
she tugged her lower lip
into her mouth, watching how his eyes darkened. His nostrils flared just a bit
as his fingers tightened around the napkin on the table.

“Or
perhaps I shouldn’t have left it up to you. You’re really throwing off some
conflicting signals, and have been doing so for the past several weeks. It’s
enough to make me want to paddle your bottom again.”

She
opened her mouth to protest but knew he was right. She’d been open to
everything he’d given her, including their earlier kiss, while hiding behind
his promise to not pressure her into anything more. “I’m sorry. I don’t mean
to.” She tossed her braid over her shoulder “This is why I wanted limits set on
our relationship. I get lost in my Dom’s possession all too easily. I
appreciate the fact you haven’t taken advantage of it but…”

“Stop.”
He held up a hand to end her
rambling. “Let me ask you something, Sabella. What would you do if I asked you
to reconsider? To allow me to show you for a single weekend what it is to be my
submissive?”

Her
breath caught. She’d fall in love with him even more than she already was. “I…I
don’t think it’s worth the risk, Ethan. You never denied the fact you only use
submissives on a temporary basis, when I asked about it after my spanking. The
reasons I gave you then still stand. I need more than a temporary Dom. I can’t
separate my emotions from my submission.”

He
gazed at her thoughtfully, his fingers toying with the silverware. “Have I ever
asked you to? You asked if my past relationships since my wife had been
temporary. And I won’t lie to you. They have been. But that was by choice on
both sides. All those submissives knew the terms going in, and used my knowledge
to their advantage.”

“And
I have no reason to believe it’d be any different in the end with me.” She
shook her head…even though it hurt her to. “No, I can’t risk it.”

He
sighed. “So that’s it then? You shut me down because you’re scared of something
which hasn’t even been determined.” He cupped his chin on his palm with his
elbow resting on the tablecloth. “I think it’s foolish and a bit cowardly on
your part…but if you wish for it to remain the way it is, I’ll abide by your
wishes…”

Fury,
not unlike what she’d felt at New Beginnings, swamped her, but this time she
controlled it, mindful of being in a public place. “Are you calling me a
coward?” She wadded up her napkin in her fist.

He
raised a brow at her. “If the shoe fits…”

Blood
rushed in her ears. “If I actually agree to this weekend and it doesn’t work
out, will you let this go? Or will you actually want to sleep with me?”

He
gazed at her calmly. “You’re not going to do this. I won’t allow you to turn
something that’ll more than likely be pleasurable for both of us into
blackmail, Sabella. If you agree to spend the weekend with me, it’ll be because
you’ve decided your need is stronger than your fear, and allow me to guide you
to what you’re seeking.”

Suddenly
she felt ashamed. That’s exactly what she had done. She’d made what she was
sure was supposed to be a one-time offer to see if there was something more
between them, seem like nothing more than a ploy to get into her pants. “I…dang
it...” She sighed. “I don’t know what you want me to say, Ethan.”

He
took a sip from his water. “I want you to be honest with yourself and with me.
I see during our sessions how you struggle to let go. How you’re fighting to
control your natural inclinations to not submit only to the ropes, but also to
me. As if you’re afraid of what will happen if you let go.” He set his drink
aside. “I may be what you consider a temporary Master, but it doesn’t mean I’m
mean spirited, or that I have nothing to offer you.”

“But
at what cost?” She wanted to flee, but had a feeling even if she
did,
he’d only continue their discussion the next time they
got together for training. And even as much as she didn’t want to have this
discussion, she couldn’t force herself to give up their training together, or
the possibility the next time out she’d find what had been eluding her.

He
studied her, his expression guarded. “There’s no cost, Sabella. I’d never
charge you…”

She
wanted to smack him with her wadded up napkin. “Don’t play dense with me, Sir.
You’re much too smart to even attempt to pull off such an idiotic assumption.
You darn well know what I’m talking about. I’m talking about the personal cost.
What would happen if I’d fall in love with you during this weekend? Where would
it leave me in the end?
With you walking away from me?”

His
eyebrows drew together before he finally slumped back in his chair. “What makes
you think you’d fall in love with me, Sabella? We’ve never been anything more
than partners for this demonstration…”

“Don’t
you see
,
this is the real issue? You don’t see what I
see when I look at you. You’re a great man. You care about those around you.
You’ve been up to the hospital nearly every day to visit Zebadiah. You put up
with my quirky friend, Lauren. You even came over to meet my father when most
men wouldn’t, at least not for a temporary submissive who’s merely helping out.
I see all these things and combined with the connection I felt the night after
my spanking, it makes you a danger to my heart. It’d be very easy to fall for
you.”

Steepling
his fingers, he was quiet as he processed what she just said. She’d seen this
happen several times during their time together. She was sure he was weighing
options in how to proceed, and while others may have found the habit annoying,
she found it quite charming. It appealed more to her than a guy who went off
half-cocked.
Only another thing to love him for.

“So
what’s stopping you from what I offer is this idea of you falling in love…”

If
she thought it would help, she’d brain his stubborn ass. Like any other man, he
was focusing on what he wanted to hear. “It’s not the falling in love part I’m
worried about, Ethan. I can handle that. It’s you not returning my feelings,
which scares the hell out of me.”

Ethan
watched as Sabella left. After dropping her little bombshell, he’d been shocked
when she’d quietly excused herself, under the guise of going to use the
restroom. While she was gone, the waiter returned with the wine selection. He
absently tasted the wine, commenting on the light floral taste and crispness of
the house label. Once he approved the bottle, the waiter left it breathing in
the ice bucket next to the table.

He
continued to sit there, trying to make sense of what Sabella was actually
asking for. He cared about her a great deal.
More than what he’d
ever expected but to call it love?
It was too soon. He hadn’t even
considered himself to truly be in love with Tamiko, and he’d known her for the
better part of twenty years before they’d married. On the other hand, he had a
feeling if he didn’t give her something, things would continue as they were,
with only a partial connection as he found it more and more difficult to
control his need.
Even with the solo sessions in the shower. Dear Lord
above, I don’t think I’ve wanked myself nearly as much when I was a teen as I
have in the past month.

“Dr.
Tremaine, is that you?” Louis Vayarti’s intrusion was shocking and brutal. The
last thing he wanted this evening was to see the idiot. Ethan understood Louis
was getting nowhere substantial. The man seemed to be only giving him the
answers he thought Ethan expected, and his anger management therapy appeared to
be only a ploy, to satisfy the court orders.

“Hello,
Louis.” He kept his voice cool. Perhaps if he played this as a competent
psychiatrist meeting a patient in a normal social setting outside the office,
the man would leave. The last thing he wanted was for Sabella to return to the
table while Louis was present.

“Out
on a date?” Louis looked around the crowded restaurant. “I saw your date from a
distance - she seemed quite attractive. Reminded me greatly of a submissive I
used to know in New York.”

Keeping
his cool had always been easy for Ethan, but at the moment he wanted nothing
more than to throw the fool down in a classic
Hojōjutsu
move,
bind him fast with the cross
binding, and have him carted out of sight. “While this is quite interesting, I
can you assure you my date is quite local, and I’d like to return to it.”

Louis
flashed him a bright smile.
“Of course.
I hope she’s
worth it. But before I leave
I
was wondering if you’d
given any thought to my last request?”

A
chill went down Ethan’s spine. While everything inside of him screamed with
unease at granting Louis’s request to go to a club, he had insufficient
evidence to give Louis’s parole officer a negative response, but he wasn’t
ready to just give free rein for the man to go to whatever club he wanted. He
had a job to protect those who didn’t recognize the potential predator under
Louis’s thousand dollar suits. With patient-doctor confidentiality rules, he
couldn’t call other local clubs and warn them about Louis.
Perhaps it’d be
best if I give him a little bit of rope, but under my direct supervision.
“I’ll
tell you what, Louis. Let me talk to my partner and I’ll see what can be
arranged.”

Louis
flashed him a smile. “That’d be great, Doc. Now I’ll skedaddle before your girl
comes back. Have a great night.” Louis shoved his hands in his pant pockets
before weaving his way through the tables towards the front of the dining area,
and just in time. Sabella appeared next to the table. Sliding into her seat,
she looked more composed than before she’d left.

“I
see our wine’s arrived. May I have a glass?” She eyed the bottle hopefully.

“Of
course, Sabella.”
He
set about pouring her glass. “It’s rather good for a house wine.” After handing
her the glass, he got straight to the matter. “So what if I told you I was open
to the idea of exploring the feelings I have for you?”

* * * *

Louis’s
jaw nearly hit the floor. Sitting in his idling car, he was now listening to
his idiot doctor talk to Louis’s former submissive via the small bug he’d
managed to place on the side of the wine bucket, when the fool had been busy
finding away to get rid of him before the little slut had returned from the
powder room. He’d been shocked when he’d spotted her after his last session,
but was suddenly glad he’d followed his instincts and followed her home.
Imagine his surprise when she’d left her apartment tonight with Tremaine.

“She’s
mine, you asshole.” His fist hit the steering wheel. “You won’t have a chance
in hell with her, Tremaine. Your soft spoken Jap shit won’t do it for her. She
needs a hot blooded Italian to control her.” Louis waited to hear the
inevitable rejection spill from his little Bella’s lips. She’d never cheat on
him - not if she knew what was good for her.

“What
exactly are you suggesting, Sir? That I allow us to spend time together with
the hope something more might come of it?”

There
was a pause and a rattle of dishes along with the arrival of what must’ve been
the waitress. Louis wanted to curse as the noise drowned out the voices. As
soon as the ambient noise died down again, he was able to once again hear their
conversation.

“…what
you’re asking, little
one,
is for me to predict the
future. There are no guarantees, even in a vanilla relationship, it’s going to
last. What I can promise, however, is that while we’re together, it’s just us,
and I’m not looking for the door. I want to see where this attraction and
connection can take us - but I can’t promise we’ll end up where you want.”

Louis
wanted to howl. The damn man was moving in on his territory. If he thought for
one second he had a chance with Louis’s woman, the good doctor was sadly
mistaken. His Sabella was too smart to allow another Dom to claim what Louis
considered to still be his. It was true he’d let her go but she’d once been
his.
And I’m not going to make the same mistake I made with Rena. I’m
through asking.

There
was a few seconds of silence before she finally
answered,
her voice so soft Louis could barely make out the words. “I understand that,
Sir. I’m not asking for promises of forever here - you can no more predict the
future than I can. However, I don’t like the idea of going into a relationship
where I know the man I’m putting my trust in is looking, and assessing every
other man he meets, as a possible replacement for him in my life.”

Louis
chuckled. “That’s my girl. Give him
hell,
tell him how
much you don’t appreciate his toying with you. How you don’t need anything from
the Temporary Dom of Napa Valley.”

The
sudden knock on his window and strong beam of light startled Louis so badly he
nearly pissed himself. Seeing the uniformed officer, he wanted to groan. He was
doing nothing wrong.
Merely sitting in a parked car listening
to the radio.
Cautiously he lowered the window after clicking off the
radio he’d been using as a receiver.