Tempting Tatum (3 page)

My mom is the administrative assistant to the mayor of Murfreesboro. She and my father have been married for twenty-eight years. She, and I quote, “Just wants her babies to be as happy as she is.” In Mom terms, that means get hitched and have me some grandbabies. Of course, Asher and I are first on the hit list, with Ember just graduating from college. She graduates in a few weeks with her degree in elementary education. She wants to teach kindergarten. Ember has always loved kids.

At one time, I thought I would be the first to make my parents grandparents. My ex, Beth, and I dated for two years. I was ready to ask her to marry me. The day I had planned to ask her, she showed up on my doorstep. She had news for me. Apparently, she had been sleeping around behind my back. She was six weeks pregnant and the baby wasn’t mine. It had been longer than that since we had slept together. The department was short-staffed due to an injured man. With the hours I picked up there as well as my time at the shop, there was not much time for anything else. I was trying to make the shop a success so I could buy a house. Asher and I were living in an apartment at the time. It didn’t seem to bother Beth; I guess that should have tipped me off. I was blinded by…well, a lot of things. I was preoccupied with the shop, picking up at the department whenever I could, and things between us were…fine. I assumed that proposing was the next step. She talked about it often and I was willing to give that to her. That day on my doorstep, she came clean. She had been seeing this guy for over a year behind my back. That was three years ago, and I haven’t been in a relationship since. Sure, I date, hook up here and there. I’m selective though. I don’t like the thought of using women for sex and, well, Beth pretty much ruined me ever being in another relationship. Why chance the heartache? I put all of my focus into the shop and volunteering for the department.

As I pull up to my parents’ house, I spot Asher and his girlfriend Grace. He informed me earlier in the week that he was going to propose, and that if things went well, he and Grace would be finding a place of their own. I’m happy for them. Maybe someday, I might have a change of heart and be where he is. I wanted that life with Beth: marriage, kids, all of it. Hell, if I’m honest, I want it now. I just haven’t found anyone who I’m willing to risk my heart for.

I climb the steps to the front porch and reach for Grace. I throw my arm over her shoulder and kiss her cheek. “Hey, beautiful, thanks for meeting me here,” I say with a wink.

Grace giggles.

Asher growls, “Hands off my woman!”

I throw my head back in laughter. Fucking with him never gets old. Grace is the one and only girl I’ve seen him this way with. He loves her; even a blind man can see it. I give Grace another squeeze and then release her. Asher pulls her into his chest and kisses her temple.

As soon as I’m through the door, I smell Mom’s cooking and my stomach growls. I can hear Mom and Ember talking as they finish lunch. Asher and Grace are still out on the front porch and Dad is sitting in his recliner watching ESPN. I hand out my fist for him to bump and he shakes his head with a smile as we bump fists. “Smells good,” I say.

“Yep, your mother is one of the best cooks around. One of the reasons I married her,” he chuckles.

I laugh. My parents are so in love with each other, my mom could burn every meal and Dad would still look at her like she hung the fucking moon. She looks at him the same way. I look up to see Asher and Grace walk into the room; they both have that look.

“Come and get it!” Ember yells from the kitchen. Dad and I usher in like a herd of cattle while Asher and Grace follow behind. Lunch is amazing. Mom made fried chicken, mashed potatoes and gravy, and macaroni and cheese, with apple pie for desert. Yum!

“So how was last night?” my dad asks. Being fire chief, he already knows, but he likes to get our side every time. This leads Dad, Asher, and I into talks of the department and staffing issues. Mom and the girls are planning a trip to go shopping to get some items for Ember’s new condo.

“You sure you are okay there all by yourself?” Asher asks her.

“Yeah, you know you can always stay in our spare room,” I chime in.

Ember rolls her eyes. “Guys, come on. I lived at home all through college. It’s time for me to spread my wings. Speaking of which, I really want my tattoo. When can you work me in?” she asks.

Ember doesn’t have any ink. She is going to be a kindergarten teacher so she has to remain professional. However, she is the first out of our family to go to college and finish, even out of all of our cousins. This is a huge accomplishment. She wants Asher and I to both give her a tattoo. She says she would never be able to choose either one of us. So we agreed that once she graduated we would do it.

I glance over at Asher; he shrugs his shoulders. “We’ll have to find a time when we can both be in the shop. We’ll work it out for after graduation.” I’m so fucking proud of her. I would hate the tat to jinx her before she holds that piece of paper in her hands.

Ember smiles so big I’m afraid her face might crack. “You guys are the best brothers ever!”

“Oh, go on,” Asher and I say at the same time. This causes the entire table to bust out in laughter. We do that a lot; it’s a freaky twin thing.

I take in my family and Grace, well she’ll be family soon enough. Asher already said when she says yes, that he’s going to push for a short engagement. He’s confident, and by the looks of them together, he has a right to be. It’s a great feeling to know that you have so many people in your corner. As involved as our family is with the department, we know all too well that life is short and you have to live each day to its fullest. However, even for us, we sometimes take our family, each other, for granted.

I watch as Leah shows the last guest to the door. Once I hear the sound of the lock click into place, I drop down on the couch and curl up in the corner. I feel empty, a hollow version of myself. Within the blink of an eye, my life was in flames. How do I come back from this? How do I move on without them?

Josh continued to call my cell relentlessly. Brent called and had my number changed. He stopped by a few times, but Brent and Leah threatened to call the cops. I’m done with him. I can’t deal with his shit. I don’t want to. He no longer exists in my world. I needed him; he was fucking someone else. That is the end of our story.

Leah has been staying with me. I can’t stay here alone, without them. I hear her on her cell talking to Brent. He’s been great through all of this. Sacrificing time with his fiancée so that she can be here with me. Leah and Brent, they’re all I have left. Bringing my knees to my chest, I rest my head, letting my mind wonder.

The day after the accident, I had to go to the police station to hear the results of the investigation. Leah had to work, so I went alone. My mind developed a constant string of images from the details the investigator shared with me. I keep seeing their accident play out, and it’s tearing me up inside. Officer Morgan assured me that they didn’t suffer, and died on impact. How in the fuck is that supposed to make me feel better? Leah has tried to get me to talk to her, but I can’t. It’s bad enough that I see the accident play out in my mind and in my sleep. Every time I close my eyes, the details are on instant replay. Every loud noise causes me to cringe. It consumes me. I can’t talk about it. I refuse to talk about it. She hasn’t pushed me, just hugs me and tells me that she is here for me. I have heard that so many times in the last five days, but Leah is the only one I believe.

Josh showed up that first night, banging on the door, causing all kinds of commotion. Luckily, Brent was here. I’m not sure exactly what he told him. I know he told him about my parents, but I have a feeling he also threated some type of bodily harm. Brent is a big guy, tall about 6’2 and broad shoulders. At first sight, you wouldn’t think of him as a pediatrician. The man is great with kids, and he loves my best friend fiercely. When I asked Leah about his interaction with Josh, she said I need not worry about it. Brent loves her and she loves me, therefore, Brent would never let anything happen to me. I’m not sure what I did to have these two amazing people in my life, but I am, and will be, eternally grateful.

The couch dips; I raise my head to see Leah sitting beside me. She places her hand on my knee. “Can I get you anything?”

“No, thanks.” I haven’t had much of an appetite. “How’s Brent?”

She smiles. “Good. He wanted me to apologize again for rushing out after the service. When you’re a resident, you don’t have much to say about your schedule. Especially since the loss was not immediate family,” she says softly.

“I understand. I don’t know that I would have done this past week without the two of you,” I tell her.

“Well, you don’t ever have to find out,” she says as my cell rings.

I reach for it and look at the screen. “It’s Josh.” This is the first time he has called since the night Brent warned him away. Leah said she saw him in the back of the church during the funeral. I didn’t see him. I didn’t see a lot of people. My mom was an only child and my dad had an older brother who passed away from a heart attack a few years ago. My gran, who just passed a few months earlier, Dad’s mom, was my only living grandparent. I have two cousins and my aunt Brenda who is now re-married. Our family was small, but loving. I grew up always feeling loved and wanted. Now…well, now all I feel is pain in my chest.

“Hey, why don’t you go pack a bag and we’ll head over to my place? We can curl up on the couch and watch movies. Girls night,” she says hopefully.

She seems to always know how I’m feeling. She’s moving away in less than a month. What will I do without her? I need to soak up as much girl time as I can, as it will be a rarity once she moves to Tennessee.

“That actually sounds great. I need to get out of here for a while. Give me five to pack a bag and change.”

“Yay! Okay, I will go finish cleaning up the kitchen and we’ll be all set. I’m thinking take out, pizza maybe?” she asks.

Again, she knows me so well. The kitchen is filled with casseroles, meat trays, vegetable trays, and I don’t even know what else. The thought of consuming any of it makes me ill.

I quickly change and pack a bag. “I’m ready,” I yell to Leah as I make my way down the hall, back to the living room.

“Great, I called and ordered us a pizza, pepperoni and banana pepper. They said forty minutes so we should be there in plenty of time.”

Leah and Brent live in a condo. It’s close to the hospital and only fifteen minutes from my parents’ house. Shit. My house. I fight against the tears that threaten to fall. I turn to gaze out the window, trying to get my emotions in check. Without saying a word, Leah reaches over and grabs my hand. She squeezes tight and continues to drive. She doesn’t make me talk. I love my best friend.

We arrive at the condo just in time. The pizza delivery guy pulls in right behind us. I insist on paying for the pizza, so Leah heads inside to get drinks.

“Marco,” I yell as I enter the condo.

I hear Leah laughing. “Polo,” she yells back through her laughter. When we were kids, we spent hours in the pool at both her house and mine playing that game.

“It’s good to see you smile,” Leah says as I place the pizza box on the coffee table.

“We wore that game out,” I reply. I avoid the fact that my smile has been missing. I don’t want to think about it, and I don’t want to talk about it. Not right now, anyway.

“Well, guess what’s on?” she asks cheerily.

“What?”

“Jeff Dunham.” She laughs just talking about it.

“Sounds good.” It actually sounds damn good. I don’t want a romance, not with my break up with Josh still lingering. I was honestly stressing over what movie we would watch and what emotions it might bring out in me. Kicking back with the comedy channel is just what the doctor ordered.      

Leah smiles as she shakes her head and laughs, mimicking the character Peanut. He’s our favorite.

We both have our fill of pizza, which for me was one slice. Leah doesn’t push, but I can tell by the look on her face that she’s concerned. We settle in on the couch, both of us curled up in a throw. I feel myself begin to grow tired as the stress of the last five days catches up with me. It’s not long before sleep claims me.