Ten (My Brothers Best Friend) (16 page)

I feel dirty for enjoying him inside me so much.
I am a whore.

As soon as this service is over and I have Dad’s ashes, I’m getting on the first plane out of here. I’ll sell Dad’s house as it is and just be grateful that this place is behind me, and maybe I’ll be able to finally move on with my life. I’ve been on hold. Dalton wasn’t the only one who got a sentence. I did too and I’m still serving it. It’s time for me to set myself free.

“I’m just going to shower and crash,” I tell him, and flinch when he looks around the place.

“It’s derelict in here, Alex. You shouldn’t being staying in here with no furniture.”

“It’s fine. It won’t be for much longer.”

I hardly slept at all last night. I lay there going over and over the way I let Dalton fuck me like I was… urgh, Lisa. I’ll just put this down to stupidity and try and forget it. I make myself as presentable as possible, which is difficult after I gave away the iron and ironing board. Once today is over maybe I’ll have some closure.

Or maybe I’ll never have that.

I hate driving in a pencil skirt - getting in the car is a nightmare. In fact, I hate wearing this entire outfit. If I’d had more time I would have bought something nicer to wear for Dad. I suppose he wouldn’t care what I’m wearing, only that I came here to get his ashes to bring him where he belongs. With his family.

I crank up the radio to drown out the loneliness drenching me, and sing along to Adele’s
Hello
, but the lyrics make me think of Dalton and tears overflow onto my cheeks. Is there a quota for tears shed over a lost love? Damn, if I bottled them they could hydrate the desert.

Why do I keep doing this to myself? I let myself get pulled back into the love/hate battle with myself and it’s exhausting. I feel like my soul is wilting from the hurt and I can’t heal. I need to go home and hold my baby, and remember all the good I have in my life. Maybe I should give things a shot with Leon. Urgh, why does that make me not want to go home? Maybe I’ll just stay on my own forever and become a nun, or a lesbian that doesn’t do the sex stuff. Is that allowed? I’m so wrapped up in my own head that it takes me a few seconds to spot the blue lights flashing in my mirror. Riding in Dad’s patrol car flashes in my mind and a smile tilts my lips for the first time in days.

I pull over, hoping they’ll pass by and go catch whoever has caused them to blast their siren, but instead they pull in behind me, their wheels kicking up the dirt. It must be because of the plates. It’s a rental car and they probably want to know who’s come to town, although it’s more than likely got around that I’m here now after the bullshit at Numbers. I rummage through my purse for my license and startle when the officer taps the window.

I hit the electric window button and turn down the radio.

My heart sinks in my chest when I see the name of the officer. Moore.

What the hell?

“Step out of the car, ma’am,” he says. His tone is lethal, and I would be lying to myself if I denied being scared right now. I look around and see another man with him, only he’s not in uniform. It’s Keith, Dalton’s uncle.

“What was I doing wrong?” I ask without a shake to my voice, despite my body trembling. I’m still tender from the altercation in the bar and the little prank they played at my house. If that’s what you can call it.

“Step out of the vehicle. Now.”

I look in the mirrors again, hoping for someone to drive by and stop, but dirt road is the only thing that stretches out behind me and before me. I’m five miles from anywhere and took the back road to avoid having to drive past anyone. The gun tapping my window makes me swallow the dry lump forming in my throat.

“Step out of the vehicle now!”

I slowly open the door and step out. The cop grabs my arm and I’m spun, my face crushed into the back of my rental car. Mother of hell, that’s going to bruise. I just got rid of the last one.

“I’m going to have to check you for weapons. You were being very uncooperative which leads me to believe you’re hiding something.”

“That’s ludicrous.”

His hand pushes down on the back of my head, squashing my cheek against the hot metal of the car. “Move and I’ll arrest you for assaulting a police officer and resisting arrest.”

Tears burn in my eyes. This is so wrong. I have done nothing to deserve this. I don’t understand why everyone blames me for Dalton serving time but I know this has something to do with him; it’s all connected to him.

Unfamiliar hands roam over my body, causing bile to rise in my throat, and my body tenses. When his hand drops between my thighs and up my skirt, I fidget, my insides screaming at me to flee.

Where would you go? To the police?

“I told you to stop moving. Are you nervous about something?” He pins his body to mine.

“You’re searching me for no reason, and in an inappropriate manner. I will report you,” I say, hoping I sound stronger than I feel.

His harsh, deep laugh sends shivers through my body. Ice floods my veins when his gun taps against my cheek.

“In case you haven’t realized it yet, princess, I’m the law in these parts. Your Daddy made that possible, but he’s gone now and the deal that was once in place is now void.”

What the hell is he talking about? What deal?

“Keith, do you think I’m being inappropriate?”

“I think you’re doing your job. This car was driving too fast, and with a broken tail light, and then she began acting shifty and didn’t do what was asked of her.”

“I wasn’t driving too fast and my tail light isn’t out,” I sob, ashamed that they have me so scared and vulnerable, and I’m completely lost about their cryptic words about my Dad.

The crunch echoes in my ear from Keith smashing something against my car. “Looks like your tail light is out.”

“You bastards!”

The cop’s weight is gone from my back in a flash, replaced with Keith’s. His scent clings to me like poison mist; it’s tobacco fused with liquor and it makes me gag. His hand twists in my hair and jerks my head back. His hot breath hits my cheek and with each syllable his spit sprays my skin.

“Bastards? You and your fucking brother are the bastards and it’s about time you paid for your disloyalty. You fuck with a Moore you pay at some point, princess. Now tell me where your fuck up of a brother is living these days.”

“I did nothing to any of you! And I don’t know where Jonah is! Why are you doing this?”

“You. I actually liked you. I thought it was brave to fuck my nephew knowing your Daddy wouldn’t allow you anywhere near him. If only he knew his little princess used to sneak in Dalton’s window and squeal like a whore being fucked in every orifice. I used to lay awake and stroke my cock to your little cries.”

I’m going to throw up in my mouth.

“I’d like to hear that,” the officer says.

I would rather die out here than let them defile me.

The sound of a car makes Keith move away from me. I straighten to look in the direction of the car that’s now stopped.

“Officer.”

“Jimmy.”

Oh, thank God. Don’t leave me with them
!

Jimmy’s familiar features come into view and I sigh internally.

“What’s going on?”

“Police work. The young lady is driving with a broken tail light.”

“I’m sure it wasn’t intentional.” Jimmy looks down to the broken glass and back up at the men. “Looks like this just happened and she’s in a hurry to get to her father’s service. Maybe you can show some compassion and let her off with a warning. I’ll take her from here, and Keith, I’m sure you can get a truck out here to pick the car up. If you’re done on your ride along?” Jimmy pushes his jacket open and places his hands on his hips, showing off an impressive firearm and badge.

“We can’t have out-of-towners coming in thinking they can break the law and get away with it.”

“Well, Tim, she’s not an out-of-towner. She was born and raised right here by the man who gave you that badge. The man who was my best friend, and who’s service I’m going to be late for.”

Tim Moore? I haven’t heard of him before but there are so many Moores, it isn’t surprising.

My eyes dart to the police badge on Tim’s chest. My Dad gave him that badge?

I see the hesitation in Keith’s eyes and sigh when he retreats to their vehicle. I stand frozen until the license plate of their patrol car fades into the distance, and then I collapse to the floor and scream. Jimmy’s strong, supportive arms wrap around me and guide me to his car.

“Did they hurt you?” he asks in a husky tone full of … what? Regret?

“I don’t understand any of this. Nothing makes sense. I feel like I’ve walked into the twilight zone. Nothing feels real. I can’t grasp on to anything because I’m in the dark about what happened.”

My eyes are sore from crying and I know I must look horrendous.

“There are some things you should know. I should have told you straight away. I knew the Moore’s might pull some shit.”

Swiping at my eyes I shift in the seat to semi face him and wait for him to talk.

“Do you know why Dalton Moore went to prison all those years ago?”

“He was dealing for his uncle. That’s where Jonah was getting his fix from, but I didn’t know at the time. Dalton never told me he was involved with his uncle’s business.” It was the truth. I had no idea Dalton was involved, and so deep too. He promised me he wasn’t like them and that he was going to play hockey and provide a real life for us.

“Your father hid the truth from you, him, and your mother. He moved you away for your safety and to keep the deceit from you.”

“I don’t understand. Please just tell me what happened.”

He reaches for his badge and swipes his thumb over it. “He was a good man. A fantastic cop. He always stuck by the law and protected our town. Jonah was a troubled kid, always had been, and he tested your father’s patience and abilities to be a good policeman. Your father looked the other way or talked people out of pressing charges against Jonah a lot of times.”

I didn’t realize things had got that bad but I know how far gone Jonah was in the end. He wasn’t the brother I knew. Drugs changed everything about him and it had terrified me.

“Jonah got involved with Keith Moore. He was the one caught dealing.”

My gasp echoes out into the silence of the car. “No. I was there when they raided Dalton’s house. I was there with him.”

“Your brother was working with the federal government to turn in Dalton for a lesser sentence. He asked him to take the drugs. It was a really shitty way of doing things, and not something I condone, but it’s usually used to bring down higher ranking members of operations like Keith’s.”

“Jonah wouldn’t do that to Dalton. He loved him. He loved me.”

Memories of that day flood into me like cement, hardening, and solidifying my blood.

I know you’re with him, Alex.

“Dalton wouldn’t have taken the drugs from him.”

You need to help him. Please, Dalton.

“He set him up to save himself,” I breathe. “And used me to help him.”

“Your father pulled every string he had to help Jonah get out of the shit he brought on to himself. It ruined your father.” He reaches over and grabs my hand. “Keith is all kinds of dangerous, Alex. We aren’t talking about petty criminals here. Your father knew they wouldn’t take this lying down so he had to make a deal with Keith.”

“What kind of deal?”

“You and your brother were to leave here and not come back, and they weren’t allowed to look for you.”

“In return?”

“Keith wanted your Dad to bring on a Moore, recruit him, and push him through the ranks.”

I shake my head in disbelief. I can’t take it all in. It can’t be true.

Opening the car door I all but fall from the car and gasp at the air to fill my lungs. I think I’m having a panic attack. I can’t breathe.

“Alex, calm down. Get back in the car.”

I bat Jimmy’s hands away. I can’t right now.

“What about protective custody? If my Dad was that worried, why not come with us and put us all in protective custody?”

“He would have had to tell you the truth. You were sixteen and pregnant, Alex. He was going to arrest Dalton for having under age sex with you from before you turned sixteen, and the way he saw it, he was saving Jonah by letting him set Dalton up, just for a different crime than the one he was guilty of.”