The Bachelor's Bed (13 page)

She startled them both by giving him a fiercely loving hug. “You'll do what's right now,” she whispered, squeezing him close. “I have faith in you.”

Then she left him alone.

It was the emptiness that scared Colin the most, the deep, ripping loneliness already filling his heart. That he had caused Lani to feel the same way was unforgivable. She deserved so much more.

He wanted to give it to her, if only she'd let him.

Having no idea how he was going to make this all better, only knowing he had to try, he went after her.

 

S
EVERAL HOURS LATER
, in the thick, repressive heat, Colin had to admit failure.

Lani had vanished.

She wasn't at her office, wasn't on a job, wasn't in her apartment.

He'd got a fulminating look from Great-Aunt Jen
nie, one that should have withered him on the spot, but he was already so miserable she couldn't possibly make him feel worse.

He had fallen hopelessly and irrevocably in love, only he'd been stupid enough to let it sift through his fingers.

He drove by every one of Lani's jobs. Nothing. Eventually he made his way back home, only to be confronted with the frantic, last-minute preparations for his fake engagement party.

Faced with only a few hours until guests were due to arrive, dinner in various stages of preparation and the house more like a home than he could ever remember it being, Colin came to a decision.

He stood in his foyer and stared down at a plant on the floor. It had a blue ribbon around it and several white flowers blooming. He had no idea what kind of plant it was, but it looked very at home.

Just another visual reminder of Lani. Somehow it strengthened his resolve. “I'm not going to give up,” he told the plant. “I love her and, dammit, she's going to hear it.”

“Well, it's about time.”

Grimacing, he turned to face an unusually quiet Bessie and Lola.

“Fix this,” Bessie demanded of him, poking him with a finger. “Because I got to tell you, Colin West, that Lani was a definite keeper.”

He managed a smile. “I know.” God, how he knew. “The party—”

“We'll worry about the party, you worry about your fiancée,” Lola said much more kindly than her sister, patting his arm. “Just go fix this mess, darling.”

He turned to leave, but suddenly Carmen was there blocking his way. She'd been hired for the day to help prepare for the party, and though she didn't look friendly, at least she hadn't stuck her tongue out at him.

Her eyes told him she thought he was one stupid man for letting Lani go. They also told him something else, and hope surged within Colin for the first time in hours.

“You know where she is,” he said, trying unsuccessfully to rein in his excitement. “Tell me.”

She gave him a sardonic gaze.

Damn, she couldn't talk. “I have to know, Carmen.” She peered deeply into his eyes for so long he nearly yelled in frustration.

The more agitated he got, the calmer she appeared. She pointed to her ring finger, then looked at him with her eyebrows raised.

“I'll buy her a ring,” he promised, but she rolled her eyes, disgusted.

What then? He would have gone running for paper and pen, but she grabbed his hand and pointed to his ring finger.

“Yes,” he said urgently. “I promise, I want to marry Lani for real. I want the party tonight to be real. But I can't do any of it unless I find her. Tell me, Carmen, please, where is she?”

She searched his eyes, and he hoped to God she found what she wanted there because he had to know. Time was running out. “Tell me.”

She nodded, then backed up to give herself space and started to…gyrate?

Bouncing, shimmying and shaking her bootie, she turned in a slow circle. Colin just stared at her, certain she'd cracked. “Uh…Carmen? We were talking about Lani?”

Irritated, eyes flashing, she stopped and glared at him with her hands on her hips.

“Okay, okay! Try again. I'm watching.”

Again she started to writhe. No…she was hula dancing? “She's taking…dancing lessons?”

Carmen sighed loudly and shot a glance heaven-ward. Then she started again, definitely doing the hula for all her heavy, sixty-something-old body was worth. Colin stared at her in amazement. “She's…oh, damn. She's going to Hawaii!”

Carmen pointed to her nose and nodded triumphantly.

He was right. Lani had apparently said the hell with life and had taken off for a well-deserved vacation.

Colin hoped he could catch her or she was going to miss her own—
real
—engagement party.

L
ANI HADN'T TAKEN
a vacation in…well, forever. She owed herself one, she decided.

Now seemed as good a time as any. Hawaii was calling.

In less than an hour she had a bag packed and had notified everyone that she was taking two weeks off. In another hour she was at the airport, staring at the departure screens, wondering which flight to take.

The airport was a bundle of activity around her. Voices, laughter, shouts, people rushing, walking, sleeping. Even the smells: coffee, leather, people, diesel, they all made her think of exotic places.

She was standing in front of a ticket counter before she knew it. The next flight left in minutes. If she was quick, she could be in Oahu for a late dinner. She'd lie on the beach watching the sunset, sipping pretty colored drinks.

She'd enjoy herself.

She would.

“Ma'am?” A friendly ticket agent smiled at her. “Are you next?”

She could be. With a flick of her poor, abused
credit card she could be gone. Outta here. Away from any memory of the man who'd broken her heart.

But that heart didn't want to run. It wasn't the answer, no matter how tempting, and she had to face the truth.

Yes, she'd fallen in love with a man who couldn't give that love back to her. But that wasn't a crime, nor was it his fault. He'd never misled her, not once.

Not only was she acting childishly, she'd done the one thing she'd promised she wouldn't—she'd broken her promise.

She'd let him down.

It hurt, just thinking it. How could she have done that to him?

At this very moment, Colin's mother and aunts would have staff racing madly through his house, preparing for their engagement party, the party she'd agreed to attend.

But her heart was breaking, dammit. To stand at Colin's side and pretend to love him, when she really did, would be the hardest thing in the world.

“Ma'am?”

“I'm sorry.” Lani smiled apologetically. She stepped aside. “I've changed my mind.”

If she lived through this heartache, she promised herself,
then
she'd travel. She'd go to Hawaii and maybe, just maybe, never come back.

But she didn't move away, not yet, just stood there
and gazed blindly at the black screen high above her, where the flight she had nearly gotten on started to blink.

They were boarding. Without her.

Then her neck was tingling, her heart racing, and slowly she turned. Standing there, chest heaving as though he'd been running, his face drawn and pale, was Colin.

“Lani.”

Just her name, but he put such a wealth of feeling into it, she closed her eyes against the new onslaught of pain.

She felt his hands on her shoulders. They slid up, cupped her face, tilted it up. “Thank God, I found you in time.”

Lani hadn't imagined this, what seeing him again would do to her heart.

Funny, but around them everything was normal. People rushing like ants toward their gates, hugging good-bye, laughing, smiling.

And her heart was breaking all over again.

“Please,” Colin said, his voice low and raw. “Don't go. I'm so sorry I didn't understand everything sooner.” His hands slid down her arms, clasped her hands tight, and in a heartrending gesture, he brought them to his lips. “Please, Lani, don't leave me.”

He thought she was going.

She glanced down at her packed-to-bulging bag.
She still stood in front of the ticket counter. In one of her hands tucked in his, she held a brochure she'd picked up at the airport entrance, one that could have been mistaken for a plane ticket.

He believed she could leave him.

“I know I don't have the right to ask,” he said urgently. “But if you could listen to me, just give me a few minutes, maybe I can change your mind.”

She owed him. She had made a promise she had no right to break simply because of her feelings for him. She pulled her hands free and stepped back. She needed to be able to think, and she couldn't do that with his hands on her. “Colin, I'm not going—”

“I know I hurt you,” he said in a rush. “I'm sorry for that, too. You're the last person in the world I wanted to hurt.”

“I'm not—”

“But you threw me, Lani. You were so…real. So loyal and trusting and sweet.” He came close again but didn't touch her. “So absolutely—”

“Colin, I'm not going.”
It wasn't his fault,
she reminded herself.
You fell on your own, knowing he couldn't return the feelings.

“Lani, I love you.”

“I'm not—
What?
” She grabbed his shirt, hauled him closer. “What did you just say?”

“I love you.”

There was a new line forming at the ticket counter behind them. It was a noisy group, but Lani man
aged to make herself heard. “That's a low blow, Colin,” she whispered furiously. “I said I'm not going anywhere. I'll be there for your damn engagement party. You don't have to tease me by telling me—by saying—
You know!
”

He blinked at her, opened his mouth in shock, but she whirled, intending to stalk off, madder than she could ever remember being.

How dare he throw her words back in her face just so that she would come back, especially when she had already made up her mind to do so on her own.

A firm but easy hand settled at her elbow, drawing her back against the hard, warm chest she'd know anywhere. “Lani, wait.”

She actually had little choice since Colin wasn't about to let her go anywhere with such a huge misunderstanding between them. Her bag fell on his foot, but he ignored the pain because it took two hands to hold her still.

The people in line seemed interested in the tussle between them but Colin didn't care.

All he cared about was keeping Lani.

Too dignified to struggle, she went limp in his arms and glared at him. “Let me go,” she snapped. “I said I'm not leaving. I'll come back with you and play house, dammit, now let me go.”

“You think I was toying with you,” he said in disbelief, staring down into her hurting eyes. “Lani—” A frustrated growl was all he could make for a mo
ment, he was so surprised. And hurt. “Listen to me. I've never said those words before, to anyone.
Never,
Lani. Do you understand what I'm saying to you? God, the last thing I would ever do is fling it around like a joke.”

Her eyes filled, not with hope or joy, but with hurt, and he felt sick. “Am I too late?” he whispered, pulling her tight to him just to feel her body heat. “I can't be, I won't let it be too late. I love you, dammit. I'm sorry I was so slow about it, but you scared me to death.”

One tear fell, but she remained silent.

Behind him, in line, several women muttered to themselves about men and their stupidity.

“No,” he said fiercely, forgetting everyone that surrounded them, most of them blatantly eavesdropping now, as he hauled her closer yet, banding his arms tightly around her. “Don't cry, I'm so sorry.”

“Say it again.”

He pulled back slightly and stared at her.

“Say it again,” she demanded.

The small crowd pressed closer, listening.

Colin's pride was gone, he had nothing left to lose. “I love you, Lani. With all my heart and soul.”

But the woman in his arms didn't move a muscle, not a one, and fear filled him. Why wasn't she saying something,
anything?

“You have to believe in me,” he said, desperate
now. “I'm a slow learner but once I catch on, it's for keeps. I know now what I've been missing in my life and it's you.”

Several women in the crowd let out a collective sigh.

“I know you've had it rough,” he said, ignoring their audience the best he could. “I know deep down you're just as afraid as me, that you have been ever since you lost your parents so cruelly. But I can love you that much, Lani. I already do, all I need is the time to prove it to you. We can start over and make our own family.”

She dipped her head down to his chest so he couldn't see her expression but he felt her shaking. God. He'd made her cry again. “I'm rushing you, I'm sorry—”

“
Rushing
me?” She lifted her head now and he saw that she hadn't been shaking with tears, but with joy. It blazed from her eyes, lighting her face and his heart.

“Colin,” she said with a laugh. “I've loved you forever. You couldn't have fallen fast enough for me.
Rushing?
” She laughed again, the sound contagious.

The crowd grinned unabashedly.

“You just finally caught up with me,” she said to him softly.

“Does this mean—” He didn't know, didn't have a clue and he was dying. “You're okay with… I can—”

“Promise me forever, Colin,” she whispered, looping her arms around his neck.

“I'll promise you forever and a day if you promise to marry me. Fill my heart with joy and love for the rest of our lives.”

She went still. “Really?”

“Marry me, Lani. For real this time.”

Lani smiled, her heart overflowing. “Oh, yes,” she agreed. Her future husband leaned down and kissed her, a soft, sweet, giving kiss full of love.

Above them on the departure board, the plane bound for Hawaii left the gate.