The Back of Beyond (45 page)

Roddy paused with a sigh. ‘I'll give you his account of what happened next, if I can find the place. Ah, here it is.'

‘Fraser froze with shock, but I couldn't chance him recovering and running off to report me, so I punched him in the solar plexus and knocked him out. Then I ran up to the bedroom and got the pillow
 …'

Out of consideration for Lexie, Liddell stopped there, but she muttered, ‘No, Roddy, I want to know everything. What did he do after he smothered my father?'

‘He wrapped him in a sheet and had two bodies to dispose of. He was telling me all this without batting an eyelid, boasting about it, but he admitted he'd had quite a struggle to drag them, one at a time, through the back door. He wondered if he should put them in his car and hide them somewhere miles away, until it struck him that the handiest place would be best, the nearest, the one it would be least likely for anyone to look, even if the police did make a search for them as missing persons. At the other side of the wall was a moor which had been shown on maps as early as the sixteen hundreds, an ideal burial ground, although it needed a Herculean effort to get them over the wall.

‘I'll quote here –
“I didn't bury them in the same grave. I couldn't have Fraser lying on top of Margaret for all eternity, but I had to get rid of the sanctimonious bastard.”

‘That was how he put it,' Roddy said apologetically. ‘The hue and cry went up next day about Alec Fraser having disappeared, but Mrs Birnie wasn't missed until one of her friends realized that she hadn't seen the doctor's wife for some time and asked him if she was well enough. That was when he put out the story about her going to Stirling to look after her sick mother, the story he'd had time to manufacture.'

Roddy waited for a moment to see if Lexie wanted to say anything at this point, but she seemed to have sunk into some kind of morose reverie, so he went on, wanting to get it over. ‘The day after the murders, Birnie was called in to attend to your mother, and he went back that night with the excuse that the two of you needed something to help you to sleep. What he gave your mother had her out like a light in minutes, he told me, so he took you through to your room, Lexie, gave you the same sleeping potion or whatever, and waited to see if it took effect. Of course, we know now that he was easily aroused by young girls' bodies, and as you took off your clothes it occurred to him how he could get his revenge on your father for interfering in things that didn't concern him.'

Only then did Lexie give a start and her eyes darkened as she exclaimed, ‘It was the doctor that raped me?'

‘Yes, it was Tom Birnie, adulterer, seducer, rapist and murderer … and liar, of course. Accomplished liar. You weren't the only one, Lexie, just one of many.'

‘That doesn't make much difference to me, though.' She made a loud gulping noise and then muttered, ‘No, I'm wrong. It does make a difference. I can think of my father as a decent man now, after all the years of hating him for what he did to me.'

‘You can be proud of him,' Liddell pointed out. ‘He wasn't afraid to do what he felt needed to be done. He did what he could for Nancy Lawrie, and if he'd arrived at the doctor's house half an hour earlier, he'd likely have tried to help Margaret Birnie. As it was, he didn't even get a chance to accuse her husband of murdering her.'

‘Everybody always said Alec Fraser was a gentleman,' Alistair put in here. ‘People could hardly believe he'd run off with anybody, never mind a girl like Nancy, but that was how it looked, and I'm glad his name's been cleared at last.'

Lexie released a shuddering sigh as Liddell got to his feet. ‘Don't leave me, Roddy.'

He bent down and kissed her brow. ‘I have to, Lexie, my dear. I've overstayed the time I was allowed, as it is.'

‘She'll be all right,' Alistair stated, firmly. ‘I'll stay with her … all night if necessary.'

‘Thanks, I hate having to go like this, but my Super wants me back right away. I'll come back as soon as I can, Lexie, but I can't promise any definite time … or day, even. There's still a lot of work to be done before we get things properly tied up.'

‘I understand, Roddy.' She was plainly trying to keep her voice steady, but she couldn't disguise its slight tremor. ‘I'll see you when I see you.'

She controlled herself until his footsteps faded, and then the floodgates opened. ‘Oh, Lexie,' Alistair begged, ‘please don't cry like that. I know how upset you must be, but it tears me apart hearing you …'

She stretched out a hand and pulled him down beside her, and he had no option but to take her in his arms – not that he didn't want to, because he felt more genuine love for her at that precise moment than he had ever done before. Over the past few weeks, too, he had found himself recalling, with deep fondness, the evenings they had spent together in the shadow of the tower when they were young … before her father … before she thought Alec had abandoned her. Not only that, it had just transpired, she had thought that it was shame at raping her which had made him leave, and that wasn't true either. But it explained her peculiar behaviour. That was why she'd been like she was, why she had suddenly started fighting him off after making him believe she wanted him to make love to her, after she'd succeeded in making
him
desperate for it. But it was no wonder she had changed. Being raped at sixteen would be bad enough, but thinking it was her own father …

How could any doctor, in a position of trust, take advantage of young female patients like that? It was … despicable, though that word wasn't really strong enough, and there was no excuse for it. And then, to top it all, he had killed his wife in a fit of rage, also an innocent well-meaning man … Christ Almighty! How low could a human being sink?

It dawned on him now that Lexie's almost hysterical sobbing had eased. ‘Do you fancy a drink to steady you?' he asked her.

She drew in a long, quivering breath. ‘I'll go through and get a bottle of brandy from the shop. Roddy and I finished one the last time he was here.'

He let her do it. It was something to occupy her for a wee while, but it gave him, unfortunately, time to imagine what she and the 'tec had got up to after finishing off a whole bottle of brandy. Had she let
him
go all the way? But maybe the bottle hadn't been full when they started? He sincerely hoped not, for even if Lexie wasn't a young girl any longer, she had kept her figure. Of course, she hadn't borne any children, so it had been easier for her than for Gwen, whose waist was thicker than it had once been, and her breasts more flabby.

A lead ball hit him in the gut. With everything that had happened, he had forgotten all about Gwen. She would be sitting in Lee Green tomorrow on her own waiting for him to show up. Of course, she might spend the night in Peg's house, or Dougal's, though that wouldn't make it any easier for her. But he couldn't help it. He had promised to look after Lexie tonight, and he couldn't let her down. He couldn't even phone Dougal to explain. If Lexie knew he had promised to go to Lee Green, she would make him go.

He raised his head with a smile when she came back with a bottle of Five Star Cognac, and watched while she took out two goblets and almost filled them. Then, after sitting down beside him again, she murmured, ‘I don't know what I'd have done tonight without you, Alistair, d'you know that?'

‘I'm just glad I was here, though I'm sure Liddell wouldn't have gone back on duty if you'd been on your own.'

She gave a tremulous smile. ‘I wouldn't be too sure of that. Doesn't duty come first, last and always with a cop?'

‘Do you … is it serious between you?'

Shrugging sadly, she said, ‘I wish I knew. I don't know what's wrong with me, but I always pick men who can't make a definite commitment to me.'

He took this as a hit at him. ‘Lexie, we were far too young …'

‘Forget what I said, I'm not thinking straight. You know, you don't have to stay with me all night. I've got over the worst, and I'll be all right.'

‘No, Lexie, if I leave now, you'll go over and over things in your mind till you're in a right old state.'

She looked at him cautiously. ‘I need to go over it again, Alistair. I want to remember how it happened. Now I know it wasn't my father, maybe other details will come back to me. As a matter of fact, just a few minutes ago, something that man said came into my head. It was while he was … actually doing it, and he must have thought the sleeping pills he gave me had taken effect, but if he'd only realized, he was keeping me awake with the pain he was causing.'

‘I think you should try to forget,' Alistair muttered, uncomfortably.

‘No, Al, I have to remember everything that happened that night, to lay it all out and see the truth of it, before I can let myself forget. Please don't try to stop me.'

His heart aching with pity for her – or could it be that love was blossoming after all this time? – he put an arm around her and pulled her against him so that her head was resting on his shoulder. ‘Get it off your chest, then, but remember, I'm here to catch you if you feel you're falling into a bottomless pit.'

She fished for his free hand and gripped it tightly, reassuring herself and drawing comfort from him before she began. She told him how happy her childhood had been, how her father had been everything a child could wish for, how he had given her a love of music. ‘I'm sure he was disappointed that I couldn't sing for peanuts, but he never said anything. He was always loving towards Mum and me, and she was quite happy for him to be helping people out of little troubles they couldn't see a way round themselves, men as well as women, and girls. Mum trusted him, that's why it came as such a shock when he just went off. He hadn't told her about Nancy, I don't know why. If he had, things might have turned out differently. As it was, she couldn't bring herself to believe he'd run away with a young girl, but there wasn't any other explanation.'

Lexie suddenly twisted round to look up into Alistair's face. ‘That's really what killed her, you know, the thought of him betraying her and the nagging suspicion he could have been carrying on with other females for years.'

Her lovely blue eyes were pleading, her trembling lips only inches away from his as he looked down on her, and he was overcome with love for her, but he knew better than to kiss her – not yet. He had to let her work out the sequence of events, had to listen if she wanted to describe every move the evil doctor had made. ‘I'm sorry, my dear.' It was all he could say.

She
did
go into every last detail which had flooded into her reawakened mind, describing Birnie's lascivious face – although she said ‘drooling' – as she undressed after taking the sleeping tablets. ‘He even unfastened my bra because my fingers wouldn't work. I don't think he put my pyjamas on for me. I think he wanted me naked …' She shuddered. ‘Wait, though, something else is coming back …' She closed her eyes for a few moments then whispered, ‘He was gripping my … breasts and moaning, not words, just sounds, then he muttered something about the sins of the fathers. It was after that, when he was fastening his trousers, that he gave a horrible, cackling laugh and said, ‘That's paid you back for sticking your nose in where it wasn't wanted, you interfering slimy bastard.' I thought it was me he was calling names and I was too young to understand what they meant, but now I do.'

Alistair felt really uncomfortable at hearing what Lexie had gone through, but he had promised to listen and he supposed it was good that she could talk about it. Luckily for him, having satisfied herself as to what had been done to her and by whom, she didn't want to go any further down that particular path.

For the last minute or two, she had been looking into the fire, but she swivelled round once more. ‘Maybe now you'll see why I couldn't let you do what you wanted, nor any of the other boys I went out with, locals and boys from Ardley Camp during the war. Not only that, I couldn't forget you, Al, you were always there in my mind. Even after you got married, I still believed I could get you back. After I met Gwen, though, I knew I'd just been fooling myself. That reminds me, have you heard from her yet?'

He shook his head vehemently. It was true – he hadn't heard from Gwen. He'd only heard of her through Peggy when she phoned. ‘Since she went away, I've been thinking more about how things used to be between us, Lexie. I think I did love you, but …'

‘But I was too eager?'

‘Aye, that was it. We … I've wasted a lot of years, Lexie … darling.'

She gave him no encouragement – he had to lift her chin with his thumb – but the minute their lips touched he believed that he could sense the electricity between them. ‘Oh, Lexie,' he groaned.

Strangely, he didn't even think of going any further than that. It wouldn't have been fair to her after what she had learned earlier, and he was content just to hold her in his arms and stroke her fine blonde hair.

They stayed like that until the fire died down. ‘Will I put on more coal?' he asked.

‘It's hardly worth it. It's ten to ten.'

‘Yes, it's time you went to bed. I'll sleep on the couch, if you look out a couple of blankets for me.'

She propped herself up on one elbow and looked deep into his eyes. ‘I don't want you to sleep down here. Come upstairs and just be there for me – if that's all right?'

He wasn't too sure of the wisdom of this – in such a situation wouldn't he be tempted? – but if that was what she wanted, he would do his best.

Later, lying on top of the bedcovers while she slept in fits and starts in the crook of his arm, he thought of his wife, who would be expecting him in the morning; of his children, who would believe that he was on his way to London until Peggy or Gwen phoned to let them know he hadn't arrived. But he resolutely put all thoughts of them out of his mind. What did anything matter? He had been reunited with Lexie and she would never, ever, let him down.