The Beginning of Us (3 page)

“Hey girl. You feelin' better?”

I nodded as I popped open my can of soda. I am, “I'm sorry. It's just been a confusing day.”

“You just seem so out of it Teegan. Like a different person.”

I didn’t want to have this conversation with her. My head was swimming with a million questions already. I didn’t know how to answer her because I didn’t have the answers myself and it annoyed the hell out of me.

“I
am
out of it today. I told you, it's just confusing. Hardly got any sleep, and had a horrible dream.” I replied, hoping she would accept my answer and move on. All she gave me was a shoulder shrug as she began to eat her lunch.

“Oh hey, I wanted to ask what we had planned for this Saturday.” I brought up, trying to be nonchalant.

“I don’t know, why?” She picked up her soda and took a sip.

I took a deep breath, “Um, ‘cause Jax asked if we wanted to go to Blythe's barn party and it sounded like fun.”

In response, Raegan gave a dramatic cough that dragged out. It took everything I had not to roll my eyes, “Alright Teegan, that is really strange, but whatever, if you wanna go we can.”

I smiled and nodded, “Okay, awesome.”

Inside I was yelling for joy. I had no idea where this dream was headed, but I was glad to see.

Chapter Three

Jax

That dream had me trippin' bad. I woke up Monday morning drenched in my own sweat. Everything had seemed so real, so freakin' lifelike, that it wouldn't have surprised me if I had woken up next to Teegan.

I was older, like middle aged or something, sitting next to Teegan Fisher. But it wasn’t the Teegan I knew. It was a smoking-hot older Teegan. We were in a living room, just cuddled up together. Her gaze was fixed on a TV mounted on the wall in front of us. She looked like a goddess even without makeup, with a messy bun fixed atop her head.

Unlike other dreams, nothing was fuzzy, and I remembered everything crystal-clear. Our mundane talk about a future event we had to go to, laughing at the comedian on the screen. She smelled like strawberries when I leaned my head against hers. When she laughed, my whole body vibrated.

Then she casually reached over and brushed against my package. That's about all it took. My tongue was in her mouth, her hands running up and down my chest. The sex afterward was amazing. It was completely mind-blowing. Her body was magical in every way and I wanted so much more after it was over.

“Jax I love you, so much,” she had whispered, running her hand through my short hair. Her eyes literally sparkled as she stared at me. Sweat covered her body. And the crazy thing is, I could feel it, feel how much she loved me because it radiated from her in every way.

It was the coolest, craziest thing ever.

I woke up sad to face reality, and a little weirded out that Teegan had been the star. I never talked to her, we didn't hang out. So why was I dreaming of her?

I was nervous hanging out in Mrs. G.'s class, waiting for Teegan to arrive. My heart was beating fast and furious as I tried to pay attention to what Kyle was saying. I heard Raegan and saw her peek in the door. I took a deep breath and focused on Kyle joking about almost bangin’ Holly McLee. I laughed at his stupid joke and my hair fell in my eyes. It was the perfect cover to look at Teegan as she entered the room.

And then she freaked out, her face paled and she whispered something to Raegan who gave her a look. Shit, what if she dreamt about me too?

Nah, that would be some sci-fi stuff right there. Not possible.

Raegan walked by me first and I ignored her. I don't know why, but she's never liked me. Ever. Teegan's been nice enough, but never friendly. I glanced up and locked eyes with her as she made her way past.

I nodded slightly and greeted her, “Hey Teegan.” The blush on her cheeks sent my heart into overdrive. She murmured something I didn't quite understand and continued to her desk. I tried to pay attention, but during the entire period, all that kept blaring in my head was the fact I made her blush.

I really wanted to do it again.

***

Teegan

That night, after dinner, I sat in the living room completely exhausted. This had been the most lifelike, longest dream I had ever had. I just wanted to wake up from it and get on my laptop to Google what all this meant. It would probably take me all day to interpret this crazy ass dream. And then underneath the urge to wake up, was the desire to stay.

A selfish part of me enjoyed sitting at the table, not having to worry about making dinner. Mama was weird when it came to help in the kitchen. All I did was set out the plates and drinks and sit down. It was different sitting through an entire meal and not have to listen to whining from Jax or Josie about something I messed up, or didn't fix. I missed Josie, I really did, but I enjoyed the freedom from the constant, nonstop demands of being a parent and spouse.

Mama came in with a bowl of popcorn and sat beside my feet, “You better darling?” she asked quietly as she settled under her zebra-print fleece blanket. She still had that blanket in the present, still used it even though she was a middle aged woman.

“Yup, just worn out. Being a teenager is hard work,” I joked, even though every word was false. It was a cakewalk compared to being a grownup. Now I had the sense to know the difference.

“Oh dear, I know. I wouldn't go back if you paid me,” Mama replied, reaching for the remote. “Can we find something else to watch?”

“Yup, you go ahead.” I zoned out, watching as my mom flipped through the channels. I closed my eyes and sighed. I was trapped between wanting to stay in this life and going back to my old one.

I felt Mama reach over and pat my calves. “The biggest lie in the world is that high school is the best four years of your life. It's not, more than likely they'll be the worst, most embarrassing years of your life and then you move on. I suppose the best years of your life are one through ten, when you still believe in Santa and the tooth fairy; in magic. When having fun is your responsibility. When the worst thing about your day is going to bed because you're not tired. Those are the best years of your life.”

I turned my head toward her and smiled, “Mama, I do believe you are the smartest woman on the planet.” I sat up and scooted closer to her where I could lean against her. Her raspberry lotion scent invaded my senses.

“Hallelujah! Finally, after all these years you actually realize,” she joked, putting her arm around me. I felt like a kid again, and even though this was a dream, I even wanted to confess everything to her. To tell her about Jax wanting a divorce, how shitty my marriage had become and how my whole world was tipping off its axis.

Because when you’re a young girl, your mom is your idol, and she knows how to fix your boo boos. And that's what I needed the most, for these damn boo-boos to go the hell away.

Chapter Four

Jax

If I thought the first dream had me tripping, I underestimated what round two could hold. It started on the beach, the same one I grew up near, the one that we had frequented so many times it had become boring.

But this time, being there filled my insides with nerves. My hands were on a girl's back, on sun-kissed skin that glistened. Her honey colored hair was in a braid snaking around her right shoulder. Tiny multi colored tattooed stars danced around her neck, looking so 3-D they were ready to fly at my face.

The crotch of my swim trunks tightened as my body reacted to being so close. And then they tightened even more when she spoke.

“Are you finished? I don't wanna get burned, babe.” Her voice was light, airy and full of happiness.

“Um, yeah, almost done.” I had answered and discovered sunblock to my left. Hurriedly, I ran another coat against her skin, wishing it was my lips making contact instead.

She giggled and scooted farther from me. My breath caught in my chest as she turned around. It was Teegan, but not as old as the version in my previous dream. She looked older than a chick in high school, though, probably early twenties.

“Why are you staring at me?” Oversized purple sunglasses blocked me from seeing her face.

“Cause you're beautiful, Teegan. Just so damn gorgeous,” I stammered, feeling like an idiot. Instinct struck and I pounced on her. She fell back, catching herself with her elbows. Our faces were inches apart and I could smell strawberries. Always, the damned strawberries. Just like she did in real life.

“Thank you baby,” she whispered, “Kiss me? Please?”

So I did. Her mouth was like honey, her lips gliding over mine effortlessly. A tiny moan escaped her lips and an overwhelming need to catch it surrounded me. Everything became frenzied, our lips crashing against each other; biting, pulling. My hands wandered over all the hills and valleys of her barely covered body and I swear I was going to explode right at that point.

“Make love to me, Jax,” she commanded breathlessly.

She didn't have to tell me again. The swimsuits came off and our bodies collided in perfect harmony. Over and over again, we made love on the beach, which we had entirely to ourselves.

“You're amazing,” I moaned one last time. Her body reacted to every touch, every kiss with need. It was true; she was amazing, every inch of her. This girl, this dream Teegan, had no idea how much she was getting from me.

I woke up just like that. It took me a few seconds to realize what had occurred as a result of my X-rated dream and I flipped the sheets off in disgust. That hadn't happened to me in a while.

I ran buck-naked to the hallway bathroom, praying my parents and Roxy wouldn't come out of their rooms and see me. Excitement flowed through me with every beat of my heart. I was going to see Teegan at school in a few short hours.

I had no idea why the hell I was having these hot dreams about her. Regardless, she had become my real dream girl.

***

Teegan

My eyelids felt like they were super glued to my eyeballs. The annoying alarm screeched until I thought my eardrums would burst.

“Teegan! Turn that off and get out of bed!” my mom yelled.
Mama?
The realization hit me hard and I sat up, fumbling with the alarm clock.

“Holy hell,” I muttered, looking around my room. Again, I was in my teenage room. Was this simply a continuation from yesterday? A never-ending dream? I must be going on 12 hours of nonstop sleep in the real world. What in the hell was happening?

I dressed quickly in leggings and a sky blue tunic. I braided my hair and left the room. I couldn't believe I had to go through the motions again. Another day going to school, to all those damn classes relearning the same shit I learned a decade ago. I never did use most of it in my real life.

Dread filled every fiber of my being, as the thought of seeing Jax again popped into my head. How was I going to do today? It might be easier, but even so.

“Teegan, your breakfast is getting cold,” Daddy commented quietly, interrupting my thoughts.

“Oh, sorry.” I sat down and devoured the bacon and sausage links set before me. I missed my mom's cooking. It may have been a dream breakfast, but it was still yummy.

I sighed happily after downing my orange juice and looked up to see Daddy smiling.

“Dang kiddo, you on a growth spurt or something?” he inquired with a raised eyebrow. A sheepish smile formed on my face and I shook my head no.

“I wish. Then I wouldn't be the same size as a hobbit.”

Mama sat in front of me and laughed deeply, crow's feet appearing at the corner of her hazel eyes, “Oh Tee, be glad you're short. Most boys like short girls, makes them feel like protectors.”

“Is that how we think, dear?” Daddy sat up taller and beat his chest with a fist, “Me protect you,” he said in a hoarse voice, “You short, me tall.”

“Exactly!” Mama replied after laughing again. “All you guys are the same. You want to feel macho.”

Daddy nodded thoughtfully and shrugged. “Meh, guess you got a point. But Teegan, don't compare yourself to a hobbit, that's just sad.”

Tears came down my cheek at the hilarity of the conversation. I missed how funny my house had been growing up. How both my parents placed value on making the other one laugh.

“No bad dreams last night, kiddo?” Daddy asked after finishing his coffee. I shook my head no.

Nope, still living in one though.

***

For the remainder of the week, I woke up every day as a teenager. Every night I prayed to go back to normal. I worried about Jax, about Josie. Where were they while I was stuck here? Was I dead? Had I actually traveled back in time? There were too many unanswered questions that were driving me crazy.

Each day Jax mentioned the barn party to me and got a little more comfortable around me. I cherished every wink, every joke he told, every time he looked at me and smiled. He had texted me on Thursday and Friday. His messages weren't important, just things like,
Hey, what's up?
or,
What are you up to?
It flattered me to no end to know I popped in his head.

I wanted to tell him my secret. Hell, telling anyone would work because it was eating away at me.

Raegan was an awesome friend whenever Jax wasn't around. Her wit and charm was unique and I understood how we had become friends. But it all changed whenever I brought up the barn party or whenever Jax would stop and talk to us. Instead of confronting her about her apparent dislike of him, I avoided the topic, choosing to ignore the increasing tension.

She reminded me of my best friend in college, Mary. At the start she hadn't liked Jax either, but eventually warmed up to him after meeting one of his frat brothers.

I took full advantage of being with my dad again that week. We hung out in his study, spending our evenings reading or playing checkers. He might have sensed something off about me, but never mentioned it. I asked his permission to go to the barn party and he seemed surprised that I was so upfront. He offered to give me his credit card to buy a new outfit and scoffed when I turned him down.