The Bridge of Peace (40 page)

“Everything is so messed up.” Grey began to pace again. “And I don’t know that I’m in a position to fix anything. I can’t undo what the board has done, but she thinks I don’t care. She thinks that birthmark keeps her from being beautiful and that I was pretending to care out of pity. How can she not know she’s gorgeous?”

“Very, very easily.” Cara cut a piece of electrical tape off its roll and put it across Grey’s cheek, above his beard. “Wear that for a few weeks, or better yet let’s fill in that space with a Sharpie. If you were a kid, everyone would look at that first and then at you. Half of them would make some sort of remark, make up a nickname, and never once let you forget it’s there. And men can get away with such a mark much easier than a woman.”

“There’s no way that’s kept men from courting her.”

Cara played with the strings to her prayer Kapp. “Sometimes our heaviest baggage isn’t who we are. It’s who we think we are. And once we believe it, we unknowingly shape our lives after that belief.”

Her words reached inside and yanked at his heart. Grey continued to help Lennie believe that lie by hiding behind the traditions of man. He wanted to protect her, but maybe all he was doing was making it easy for her to hold on to the lies she believed—just like he’d made it easy for Elsie to hold on to her lies. If he’d been willing to let everyone in the community think whatever he or she wanted to about their marriage, he’d have gotten help for them. He hadn’t protected Elsie, not really.

His days of hiding and helping others hide were over.

“I’ve got to go.”

His mind ran in a dozen directions as he drove his rig to Lennie’s. He hurried up the steps and knocked. Nicky barked, but no one answered the door. She didn’t appear to be home. He went to her Daed’s shop. No one was there either. It was possible she had gone to Allen’s, especially with her being upset. He climbed into his buggy, wondering what fireworks his presence at Allen’s would cause.

After pulling into Allen’s driveway, Grey hurried to the door and knocked.

Emily opened the door, took him by the hand, and squeezed it. “Grey, kumm.”

“Is Lennie here?”

Allen walked into the room and stared at him in disbelief. “I cannot believe you’re here.”

Even as Grey stood inside Allen’s home, memories of Lennie filled him—her voice, her sense of humor, her sincerity, determination, and stubbornness. One look into her eyes redefined love to him.

“I know how this must sound to you. And I understand why you feel like you do, but I’m in love with your sister.”

“In love with her?” Allen pointed to the door, inviting Grey to leave. “This conversation is not taking place.”

“I don’t blame you for believing part of the lies Dwayne told. Too many people are, including Lennie. I didn’t try to pawn her off. I knew she felt a little lonely and wasn’t seeing anyone, so I mentioned to Christian that he could bid on her picnic basket at the auction.”

“Christian moved here less than five weeks ago, so somewhere between then and now, you’ve fallen madly in love with my sister, and I’m supposed to trust your feelings on that matter. You’re not in love with my sister. You’re using her to feel less lonely. And I won’t stand for it.”

“Sometimes,” Emily interjected, “when a spouse dies, the loved one left behind feels the connection of marriage for the rest of their life. Some marriages do not have that connection even when both are alive.”

“What?” Allen’s face twisted with disapproval.

Emily held up her index finger and left the room.

The air itself seemed to condemn Grey as Allen’s eyes held complete disappointment. But as unreasonable as Allen could be at times, he respected his wife’s opinion. Well, he usually did. Grey hoped this was one of those times.

Emily walked back into the room carrying a cracked and chipped teacup and saucer. “Elsie was my secret sister for sharing gifts one year. It wasn’t like her to participate, but she did one time about three years ago. When I opened the gift and it was broken, she apologized and left the room. You can imagine how shaken someone like Elsie was to give a broken gift. I followed her, and through her tears she shared a few fragmented sentences, saying it hadn’t been broken when she’d wrapped it, but it matched everything else she touched, including her marriage. She didn’t say much else, but I was able to see into her world and Grey’s.” Emily closed her eyes. “Grey has been grieving the death of his marriage for many years.”

Allen became completely still.

Emily placed the cup in her husband’s hand. “He’s been alone for a long time, husband. I believe he loves your sister—a good, solid love you can trust. Can you not look at those two and know in your heart they are right for each other?”

Allen studied the cup as if trying to see what Emily had seen. “I … I want you to stay away from my sister.”

“I intend to do everything I can to let her know I love her. I don’t care if everyone else stands against us, but you and I have been close friends our whole lives, and I know you love her like few brothers love a sibling.”

“What you’re doing is inexcusable. You used my home to get close to her. If what Emily says is true, then what I see is a man who knows how to hide who he really is from everyone, including his closest friend.” Allen shook his head. “You were married to someone else yesterday. And today my sister is broken! You did this, and you want to call that love? If you don’t leave her alone, our friendship is over!”

Allen’s words were no idle threat.

“I’m sorry to hear that.” Grey left.

Thirty-Four

Dwayne stood in his parents’ home trying not to laugh as he listened to the good news. His heart thudded like a drum in his ears, pounding out the rhythm of hatred. But his genius had again proved itself. Lena was fired.

“They let her go because of me?” Peter asked.

“No, because she’s an idiot,” Dwayne added.

“Why do you have to hate everybody? What’s she ever done to you?” Peter’s whine grated on Dwayne’s nerves.

“That’s enough, boys,” Mamm said. “I’ll be the teacher for the rest of the year.”

“From one idiot teacher to another,” Dwayne mumbled.

“What did you say?” Mamm asked.

“If I’d wanted you to hear me, you would have. So where is she now?”

His Mamm shrugged. “Jake said she was at the school, cleaning out her desk.”

And Dwayne knew she had walked to school. “I got better things to do than stand around talking about Lena.”

He went to his room and eased the Hot-Shot from the top shelf in his closet. He’d need this.

His bedroom door swung open, and Peter’s confused, almost blank face stared at him. “You think this is funny, don’t you?”

“I think it’s sad that you’re too stupid to know when you hear good news.”

“Why Lena? You’ve been gunning for her since we got here. Why?”

Dwayne slid the cattle prod back into its place. “Oh, I haven’t gunned for her. Doubt if I will. Not a good idea.” Dwayne moved to his bed and sat down. “You’re taking it too hard. She’s cursed. The whole community needs to be rid of her.”

Peter grew stock-still. “What do you mean by that?”

Ire flew through Dwayne as he realized Peter no longer sided with him easily. Peter’s betrayal wouldn’t last long. He’d see to that. “You might like her, little brother, but she’s done nothing to make you any brighter.”

“Of course not. Nobody but you knows anything, do they?”

Dwayne rushed off his bed and shoved Peter to the floor. “Don’t you ever think you can talk to me like that. You’re too stupid to see she deserves what she gets. Make that mistake again, and I’ll give you a flogging like never before.”

Peter fought back, swinging and kicking, but Dwayne had fifty pounds on him. He pinned him facedown and pulled his arm up behind his back. A little more pressure, and it’d snap. “Stupid.” Dwayne got off of him. “Get out!”

Lena toted the cardboard box as the road continued to stretch before her. It surprised and disappointed her how few items she had to show for all her years of teaching. The weight of her pain seemed insufferable. She’d never envisioned leaving her beloved job like this.

Although her reality never supported her dreams, she’d always believed she’d end her time at the school due to getting married. Teachers never began a school year if they knew they were getting married during that wedding season. Most knew when school ended in May that they would marry during the next wedding season that fall. That made the end of the school year so joyous for the teachers, a special time Lena had celebrated with a lot of teacher friends at other Amish schools. Being the fool she was, she’d dared to believe it would happen to her one day.

Studying the fields for a distraction, she tried to keep her emotions in check. She’d not fall apart until she got home. She just wouldn’t. Dwayne Bender thought he’d accomplished something special, but she knew her people. They had reason to be upset with her, and they were. But if he thought this would cause them to turn on her, he didn’t know her community. They’d let the board members deal with the issues, and they’d accept their decision, but they’d also begin to see Dwayne for who he was. Life took patience. This wasn’t over yet. It couldn’t be.

Still … she couldn’t stay here and watch them pity her. Sounds of leaves and twigs crunching made her study the patch of woods beside her. It didn’t sound like squirrels or even deer. It seemed too loud and very rhythmic, like a person walking. She saw nothing, so she continued on. The noise seemed to be trailing each step she made. Pretending she heard nothing, she picked up her pace and then spun. A shadow of a man ducked behind a tree. Chills ran over her. She moved to the far side of the road, walking fast and looking for a stick or rock or something.

A little relief eased over her when she heard a horse and buggy approaching from behind. It slowed and eased up beside her. “Lennie.”

She jolted, dropping her box. Glass shattered, making her cringe.

Grey stopped the rig and started to get out.

She waved him away. “Don’t you dare get down to help me.”

He stayed in the buggy. “I need to explain things. Let me give you a lift.”

She stooped and gathered as many items as she could. Mostly the box contained gifts her scholars had given her—lots of red pencils with her name, various handmade containers for holding rubber bands and the like, and a now-broken vase.

“No.” She refused to look at him.

“We need to talk, Lennie.”

Gathering the larger shards of the vase, she remembered the day the class had given it to her. It’d been expensive, and they’d gone in together. She placed the pieces into the box. The sound of another buggy approaching caught her attention. “Go, before you’re seen.”

“I don’t care. Anyone and everyone can think what they want to. I’m done hiding. And I’m finished with following the traditions. This is about us.”

She didn’t doubt his sincerity. But his motives betrayed him. He felt really bad for her and wanted to make it right. She continued to place most of her treasures into the box, but some had been too scattered to find. “Look, your decision to stop hiding stems from the same reason that motivated you to look for me Saturday night—you feel sorry for me. Just go away.”

“Ach, kumm on,” he complained. “Everything I said Friday night is true. Can’t—”

“Stop,” she hissed at him. “I don’t believe you. Can you understand that?”

“No, I don’t get it. I hear you, but it makes no sense for you to feel that way. None.”

“Look, it was easy for me to get the wrong idea. I should’ve known you were just … being nice.”

“We were drawn to each other—”

“Ya,” she interrupted him again. “You to me because you were lonely and me to you because I was fool enough to believe you loved me.”

“Len—”

The buggy coming toward them slowed.

Tears defied her and sprang to her eyes. “Just go. You hurt for me right now and want to make it all better, but that’s not enough for me. Would it be for you? When the time is right, you’ll find some flawless-skinned beauty and really fall in love.”

“I … want you.”

His words had the power to carry her into another world, and if she believed he meant it, she couldn’t make herself stay away. Before she could open her mouth to speak, the approaching carriage rattled to a stop.