The Choosing (20 page)

Carrington sat, legs crossed, the sun hitting her knees through the window in Isaac’s great room. Her chair was positioned at an angle facing the couch where Isaac was paging through a stack of papers and sipping his afternoon coffee. He’d requested that she come see him concerning an urgent matter yet had scarcely spoken since her arrival twenty minutes earlier.

She drank a cup of hot tea and tried to wait patiently. Her mind drifted in dangerous directions with the silence. She was certain that when Isaac did finally speak it wouldn’t be to deliver good news. Surely a sudden call to his home could only be negative.

Maybe it concerned Larkin. Maybe she had said something about them sneaking out to see Aaron. Or it could be that Arianna had reported on others to save herself after being arrested late yesterday afternoon. Perhaps the situation with Remko had finally surfaced and Isaac was enjoying making her sweat before nailing her with criminal accusations she wouldn’t be able to counter. The waiting was painful.

Isaac finally set down his papers, reclined against the couch, and glanced up at Carrington. Her heart picked up pace and she forced her face to remain calm.

“As I’m sure you’ve heard, Arianna Carson was arrested yesterday for suspicion of treason,” Isaac said. Carrington nodded and Isaac cleared his throat. “What I have to ask you is difficult for me because I would hate to know that you were somehow involved in her activity.”

She clutched her hand to keep it from shaking. Was her thoughtless decision to go with Larkin about to cost her her freedom?

“I know that Arianna came to visit you while you were working at the factory. Will you tell me why?”

Carrington was a bit surprised by his question and quickly tried to sort through their interaction that day to find some part of it that wouldn’t get her in trouble.

“Had you seen her before that day?” Isaac asked.

“Yes,” Carrington said. “I mean, everyone has seen her, but that was our first face-to-face talk.”

“Then why come to see you?”

“She wanted to congratulate me on marrying into the Authority circle and talk to me about what would be expected of me in the coming months.” Carrington raced through their conversation as if her memories were on fast-forward and came to the conclusion that her answer was valid, only missing a couple of details.

“And how did that encounter take shape?”

“It wasn’t long. We walked and she told me that what people expect of you once you live among the Authority families will be quite different from what I have been used to.” Carrington could hear her words coming out
too quickly and she focused on slowing her speech. “She wanted me to know that if I ever needed anything I could go to her.”

Isaac studied her for a long moment as if analyzing her answers. Carrington prayed her face was clear of guilt and kept her eyes forward.

Finally he nodded and readjusted his position on the couch. “Did she mention someone called Aaron to you at all?”

Carrington only paused for one second to consider her options. Lie or tell the truth? Being truthful would make her complicit in Arianna’s crime: If Carrington had known about Arianna seeing Aaron, why had she not reported it? But lying was possibly more risky. Could she pull it off and ignore the guilt she was already beginning to feel?

“No,” Carrington said.

“Are you sure?”

Arianna’s face appeared inside Carrington’s head but she pushed it out. “Yes.”

Isaac paused, weighed her words, and then smiled. His body relaxed and his eyes lightened. “I am happy to hear that. Arianna has caused quite a stir inside the Authority families’ safety net as well as within the community. She was right, though; there is a different set of expectations for those inside the Authority circle. Is that still something you believe you can live up to?”

“Yes.”

“Good, because we cannot afford to have any further incidents with this rebel called Aaron.”

A sudden courage sank into Carrington’s bones and before she could think it through, she opened her mouth. “Have you had many incidents?”

Isaac seemed to be caught off guard and Carrington wondered if she had overstepped her bounds, but then a strange pleasure crept into Isaac’s eyes. “Yes. Over the last couple of months we have arrested many people trying to fight the system after being misled by this man. It is dismaying how easily people can be fooled by false teachings. He offends God openly. The whole thing is disgusting.”

“And Arianna was involved in this open rebellion? She didn’t seem like the type.” A new plan was hatching slowly inside Carrington’s head as she continued to drag information from Isaac.

“People are very rarely what they seem, which is why I was fearful when I heard you had been seen with her. Arianna has always been a bit of a free spirit, unfortunately. The rest of the Authority has tried to delicately advise President Carson on the matter, but he never listened. As my father used to say, every sin has a price and the bill must ultimately be paid.”

“I wonder what caused her to go to such extremes.”

“That remains an unanswerable question. She isn’t saying much at this time. It would be helpful to know what made her choose to commit such a grave error.”

Carrington placed her teacup down on the table in front of her and took a deep, silent breath. If she was going to do
this, it had to be now. “This may be asking too much, but perhaps I could speak with her.”

Isaac looked dubious. “Why would you want to do that?”

“She came to me and showed such kindness, and we are nearly the same age; perhaps she will speak to me about her mistake. It may be helpful to stop others from following in her footsteps.”

The room was still for a long moment. Carrington began to lose confidence in her plan. Isaac hardly looked convinced, and it was a huge leap. She hadn’t married into the Authority circle yet. Why would they let her see the president’s incarcerated daughter? She was about to tell Isaac she was wrong for asking and had spoken out of place when he surprised her.

A small smile cut his lips and he gave her a look of near admiration, which was a bit startling. “I may be able to arrange that. It pleases me to see you take such an interest in healing this city.”

Carrington forced a smile and bobbed her head. Whatever he needed to think so she could get to Arianna was fine by her.

Arianna wasn’t being held in a cell, as most prisoners would be. Being the president’s daughter had its benefits even after being accused of high crimes against the state. She was being held under lock and key inside a guest room within
the president’s second home, which was still nearly a castle. The house was heavily guarded, with CityWatch members at every entrance and scattered around the grounds.

It had taken Isaac only a few hours to set up the meeting, and he rode with Carrington and walked her in through the front door. A couple of CityWatch soldiers occupying the front room of the house stood at attention when Isaac entered. He nodded for them to resume their previous positions and told Carrington he would wait for her there.

A guard led her back into the house and down a long hallway that had five doors running along each side. At the end of the corridor, armed guards flanked a final door. Carrington thanked the guard granting her entrance.

The room was large and filled with light, breathy colors
 
—blues and pinks, a dash of yellow. Large bay windows invited the sun to dance across the entire floor. It was a bedroom
 
—probably the master, judging from its size. Carrington could see guards outside manning the windows and couldn’t help but feel a bit claustrophobic.

Arianna was sitting in a wooden chair by a large fireplace that was not in use. Her eyes didn’t turn toward Carrington as she entered the room; they stayed forward, peering out the window. Carrington heard the door shut behind her with a soft click and then it was just the two of them.

Carrington stood awkwardly for a moment and then inched toward the motionless girl. Her shoes shuffled through the fluffy carpet.

When Carrington was a few feet from the fireplace,
Arianna turned and smiled. Carrington wasn’t sure what she had thought she would find, but the graceful smile beaming at her under brightly lit green eyes was completely unexpected. Arianna looked as if she’d just woken from the most peaceful sleep
 
—her skin fresh, her body folded perfectly in the chair, a sense of comfort and rest flowing off her shoulders like silk.

There was no sign of worry or fear in a single line of the girl’s face. There was only peace. Carrington thought her mouth might be gaping open, and when a soft chuckle fell from Arianna’s lips, she knew that her expression must reveal how shocked she felt.

“I was hoping to get the chance to see you again,” Arianna said. She motioned to a chair beside her and Carrington took her direction.

“The house is beautiful,” Carrington said. It was the kind of thing a person said when they were avoiding talking about the obvious elephant sucking up all the air in the room.

“Everything is beautiful when you see it properly,” Arianna said.

Clearly she didn’t care about the elephant.

“Did they send you?” she asked.

Carrington shook her head. “No. I asked to come. I think they are hoping you will talk to me, though.”

“My father, the Authority Council . . . they’re hoping I will say that I had a momentary lapse in judgment and reaffirm my allegiance to their laws and their religion.”

“I’m not sure you have any other choice.”

Arianna turned toward Carrington and sadness filled her eyes. “Do you really believe you have no choice?”

“I’m afraid of what will happen to you if you don’t.”

“Fear is an illusion, Carrington. What’s the worst they can do
 
—kill me?”

“Arianna
 
—you can’t honestly tell me you aren’t afraid of death?”

Arianna dropped her gaze to her lap and drew in a long, deep breath. She closed her eyes and let the room remain still until a small smile touched the corner of her mouth and she lifted her head toward Carrington.

“No, I can’t say I don’t feel fear, but that’s because life is a series of forgetting and remembering. Only when I forget who I am does the fear invade. I just have to remember.”

Carrington felt irritated by the girl’s stubbornness. Didn’t Arianna know that she could still save herself, that she just needed to put aside her silly, childish rebellion and see the world for what it was? “How can you be so careless with your own well-being?” she asked.

Arianna chuckled again and it made Carrington’s irritation flare to anger.

“This is all a game, Carrington. Don’t you see how trapped in lies they have you? Do you honestly believe that this is the life you were created to live? That this is the way your true Father intended for you to live? That your choices are invalid or that your worth is measurable?” Arianna turned her entire body so she was facing Carrington and reached out to lay her hand on Carrington’s knee. “I know
you are battling questions. I did as well. I also know you hear the Father’s voice inside you, though you’ve worked hard to silence it. Stop fighting it and listen.”

Carrington felt herself losing control of the conversation and her own strong hold on her feelings. She sensed the cage containing the voices of her doubt beginning to crack open. Arianna’s hand on her knee was like fire spreading up into her gut and awakening her confusion.

“There can be peace and rest. Misery doesn’t have to rule your life. Aaron led me to the Father and freed me; let him lead you.”

Carrington moved her knee and slammed the cage door, silencing the voices inside. She had come here to beg Arianna to save herself
 
—to repent
 
—because she couldn’t stand to think of another girl trapped in isolation, because Larkin could hardly look at anyone since she’d been released, because Helms was dead, because Remko was cold, because Carrington feared she was already going to face a life of misery and Arianna shouldn’t have to as well. She knew she couldn’t spend any more time daydreaming of love or peace or a life that wasn’t the one right before her.

“Please, Arianna, listen to me
 
—”

“I will not serve this Authority; I will not be ruled by fear.” Fire danced behind Arianna’s eyes and Carrington felt desperate to protect her.

“Listen to yourself. This is how the world works; you cannot change it!”

“I’ve already changed it. Why do you think they are
so afraid of people like me? Of Aaron? Because we can change things.”

Arianna was losing her mind. The Authority could break her like a twig and snuff her out like a single flame, yet she thought they were afraid of her. Aaron was a rogue teacher whose life could easily be taken. They were weak and the Authority held all the power. Maybe Arianna couldn’t be saved.

“I am not afraid,” Arianna said.

“You should be.”

“To fear is to suffer. Do you want me to suffer?”

“No
 
—I want to save you from suffering. That is why I am here!”