The Christmas Angel (11 page)

Sister Emily, arriving at the caravan door, finds a tea party already in progress. Jakey and Stripey Bunny are sitting at the small folding table watching Janna putting cakes onto a plate. Jakey beams with delight at Sister Emily and slides across the bench seat to make room for her.

‘Come in,’ cries Janna, always happy to dispense hospitality. ‘We can manage another small one. We’re celebrating the last day of term, aren’t we, Jakey?’

‘I’m having the Peter Labbit mug,’ he explains. ‘Janna’s mummy gave it to her when she was small. I haven’t got a mummy but Daddy gives me things instead.’ He looks appreciatively at the small iced cakes. ‘We’ve given up chocolate for Lent. And Janna has given up biscuits as well. But these aren’t chocolate so we can eat them. What have you given up for Lent, Sister Emily?’

‘I’ve given up getting cross with Sister Ruth,’ she answers, squeezing in beside him. ‘I do so hope that it will become a habit that will continue long after Lent is over.’

Jakey looks at her thoughtfully; he is considering it. ‘Haven’t you given up chocolate?’ he asks rather wistfully.

Sister Emily shakes her head. ‘It’s much more difficult
giving
up getting cross. Chocolate wouldn’t have mattered much to me.’

Janna splashes a tiny amount of tea into the milk in the Peter Rabbit mug and passes it to Jakey. He perches Stripey Rabbit on the table, leaning against the window, and seizes the mug.

‘I like tea,’ he says happily.

‘Where’s Daddy?’ asks Sister Emily. ‘Isn’t he invited to this tea party?’

‘He’s working. I’m going to stay with Pa and Mo after bleakfast because he’s too busy to look after me in the holidays now that I don’t go to nursery every day.’

Sister Emily glances involuntarily at Janna, who makes a sad little face; shrugs. ‘All those guests arriving tomorrow,’ she says. ‘It’s a bit difficult keeping an eye … you know. But you like going to stay with Pa and Mo,’ she adds cheerfully. ‘Don’t you, my lover?’

He nods, setting down the mug and reaching for a cake. ‘I like John the Baptist and Wolfie,’ he tells them. ‘Pa and I take them for walks. And I’ve got lots of toys there. Some of them used to be Daddy’s. And sometimes Dossie takes me with her in the car to see people she’s going to cook for.’

‘Goodness,’ Sister Emily says, impressed. Janna stirs a teaspoonful of honey into a mug of steaming raspberry and echinacea tea and sets it in front of her, and she smiles her thanks. ‘It sounds great fun, Jakey. I think
I
should like a holiday with Pa and Mo.’

He gives her that same considering look. ‘You could come too,’ he suggests.

‘But we have guests coming to stay,’ she tells him. ‘Chi-Meur will be full and I shall need to be here to help Janna.’

‘I’m scared to death,’ Janna admits. ‘This is the first really big retreat that I’ve done without Penny.’

‘You’ll have lots of assistance,’ Sister Emily assures her. ‘These are some very old friends who are coming. They know their way around and will be only too happy to help out. They’re family.’

Janna sits down opposite and takes a little cake. Jakey watches her anxiously.

‘Daddy will help,’ he tells her. ‘Shall I stay and help you?’

‘No, my lover, no,’ she says, laughing. ‘You have your holiday with Pa and Mo. You’ve been working hard at school all term and you deserve a holiday with John the Baptist and Wolfie. Eat your cake and after tea you can sing your new song to Sister Emily.’

By the time Clem arrives to fetch Jakey there are no cakes left but the party is a merry one. They all go out together into the early evening sunshine.

‘The clocks go forward tomorrow night,’ says Sister Emily joyfully. ‘Spring is here at last!’

She and Janna go back to the house: Sister Emily to the chapel for Vespers and Janna to the kitchen to get supper. Clem and Jakey set off down the drive to the Lodge to pack Jakey’s case ready for his holiday.

That night he sees Auntie Gabriel again, standing in the trees across the drive, looking up at the Lodge. He knows at once why she has come. It is because he is worried about Janna. Auntie Gabriel is there to tell him that she will be looking after Janna and Daddy while he is away at The Court with Mo and Pa. Jakey waves to her, really happy to see her there, and he holds up Stripey Bunny so that she knows how much they both love her.

Suddenly he hears Daddy’s footsteps on the stairs and he gives one more big wave and hops quickly into bed.

Natasha drives them west. She hates being driven, and the girls say that they feel safer with her than with Adam. They know that he resents this but it is just one of many of the power games played out between them. The girls tolerate him but only for as long as he is useful. They sit together now, nudging with sharp elbows, making faces. Today they are in alliance, knowing that their mother is in sympathy with them. She has bribed them with promises of DVDs and new clothes if they will be good during this visit to Adam’s parents. Nevertheless, they will push the boundaries to see just how far their powers extend.

‘I wanted to go to Millie’s party,’ one of them begins in a whiny little voice.

‘Cornwall’s boring,’ says the other. ‘Bo-ring. Bo-ring.’

They watch as Natasha’s back straightens, head up preparing for battle, as Adam gives a quick annoyed sideways glance at her. ‘They are
your
children,’ the glance says. ‘Deal with them.’

Natasha’s heart sinks: she really doesn’t want to have a row with Adam just now. Her agency has sacked two of her colleagues because of the recession and she’s doing three people’s work; and doing it well, she reminds herself. She’s tired though, very tired, and she could do without this long drive west. It’s not the girls’ faults that they don’t want to go. There’s so much going on in their lives and, to be fair, there’s no reason why they should be thrilled at the prospect of a weekend with two old people and a four-year-old they hardly know.

‘It’s only for a few days,’ she says quickly.

They note that she doesn’t contradict them and that her voice is conciliatory, not yet irritated, and they nudge one another.

‘It’s not boring,’ Adam says firmly. ‘It’s just different. Lovely beaches. Swimming. Sailing. Just wait until the summer comes.’

They make faces at one another. ‘
You
said it was boring,’ one of them reminds him. ‘Last time. You said to Mum, “I know it’s boring but we’ve got to make an effort. We’ll sneak out to the pub later.”’

They watch the flush of blood under Adam’s fair skin with interest. He can be quite scary when he’s cross but they aren’t really afraid of him. They’ve already assessed his place in the pecking order: Natasha is top dog, they share second place together, and Adam comes a poor fourth. But he’s OK; they can handle him. Better the devil you know … for the moment. Soon they will eject him from their nest: they’ve managed it before.

‘What I might say to your mother in private has nothing to do with it,’ he begins. His voice is already irritated and they cover their mouths with their hands and roll their eyes at one another. They love it when he rises so readily to the bait. He has such a short fuse that he’s easy game.

‘You
did
say it,’ they mutter sullenly, pretending to be hard done by, misjudged.

‘Never mind all that,’ says Natasha briskly – this, decoded, means that he is not to pursue any kind of criticism, and they writhe with delight – ‘let’s just try to enjoy it. Jakey will be there too.’

Cue for groaning: ‘He’s just a baby.’

‘You don’t seriously expect us to play with him.’

‘That’s enough,’ shouts Adam. ‘For God’s sake, just try to
be
civil for once in your lives. It’s a pity nobody has ever taught you how to behave.’

They are silent, biting their lips with glee, hardly able to believe such luck.

‘Thanks,’ says Natasha icily. She really resents this. She’s done a damned good job bringing up the girls with very little support after their father walked out. But it hasn’t been easy and she can do without snide criticism. Also, this bickering is beginning to get her down and she’s starting to wonder if she’s misjudged Adam. He seemed very strong at first, very up together, but certain other less admirable traits are emerging.

‘Oh, for goodness’ sake,’ he’s muttering, ‘you know what I mean.’

She’s not prepared to back down quite so quickly without a proper apology. ‘No, I can’t say I do.’

‘Look, all I said was …’

The girls subside, triumphant, plugging into iPods. They have won another tiny battle in the war for control.

‘We are only a week away from Easter,’ Mother Magda says into the telephone. ‘I am sure that you understand that we cannot possibly enter into any discussions during Holy Week … Yes, I know, and we have talked about it, but we have not yet come to any decisions … Very well, I shall tell the community at the next Chapter meeting … I see. I am so sorry but … Yes, Mr Brewster, you’ve made that very clear. Thank you for telephoning.’

She places the telephone back on its stand and looks across the desk at Father Pascal.

‘What is he saying?’

‘I think it’s what might be described as an ultimatum. He
says
that he cannot hold the price he has offered for Chi-Meur indefinitely and that he must have an answer soon.’

They stare anxiously at one another.

‘What do Emily and Ruth say?’ he asks.

She shrugs; shakes her head. ‘Not very much. They don’t know what to say. Neither do I. I have written to the Sisters at Hereford, who would be glad to have us, though they are equivocal about Nichola. They are a quite small and vulnerable community, with elderly and ill Sisters of their own, and are worried about how they can manage any extra responsibility. This worries Ruth who says – quite rightly – that we should all move together. However, she feels that we should go if they will agree to have Nichola. Ruth is good friends with one of the Sisters there – they did their novitiate together – and she knows the community very well. She would be happy to go to Hereford. Emily, on the other hand, feels that this is not the solution for us. She believes that there is some other destiny for Chi-Meur but cannot quite see what it is yet.’

He stirs and smiles a little. ‘I have great faith in Emily’s feelings.’

‘So have I,’ Mother Magda says at once, ‘but it is difficult simply to wait. If we move – and we may have to before very long – then we shall need the money, and an Elizabethan manor house, already partly converted for our peculiar needs, might not be as desirable to prospective buyers as it seems at first sight. I understand that Mr Brewster’s offer is very generous, given the slump in the market. He tells me that anyone else in our situation would apparently “bite his arm off”.’ She raised her eyebrows at him. ‘Not a particularly attractive idea – have you seen Mr Brewster? – but the gist of it is that we should accept his offer quickly.’

‘I wonder if he’s thought of the planning complications. Very tricky in an old grade-two-listed house. He wants it for an hotel, doesn’t he?’

She nods. ‘He already owns several, apparently, so I can only assume that he’s thought about it very carefully.’ She pauses. ‘And, of course, it’s not as if there are only ourselves to consider. There’re Clem and Jakey and Janna, too.’

‘Do they know?’

She shakes her head. ‘Nobody knows but us. Mr Brewster has promised absolute confidentiality if we agree to a private sale. Emily believes that Clem and Janna, and Jakey too, are part of Chi-Meur and that they are here for a reason. We all do. This is part of her dilemma about moving.’

‘I think I agree with Emily.’

She looks at him. ‘My responsibility is to the community. We need to remember that although change can be inconvenient and uncomfortable it is part of the dynamic movement that ensures that we live as pilgrims. We should have no possessions; no resting place. We all understand that. Nevertheless, this proposed move is not necessarily God’s will for us.’ She hesitates. ‘I suppose that I am afraid of missing this opportunity and finding that we should have seized it instead of simply doing nothing.’

‘Praying for God’s will to be revealed is not “doing nothing”,’ Father Pascal says, after a moment. ‘Waiting is a terribly difficult thing to do. I think we should tell Clem and Janna. If Emily believes, as we all do, that they are part of your dynamic movement, then they should share in the responsibility of the prayer and the waiting.’

‘Very well,’ she says. ‘I shall need to speak to Emily and Ruth, and Nichola, of course. It would be a mistake to assume that Nichola doesn’t understand, even if there is no obvious
response
from her. The prayer life of a very elderly sister can be invaluable to the rest of the community.’

There is a little silence in the small panelled room, but it is a comfortable silence that stretches between them, each drawing strength from the other.

‘So most of your guests have gone,’ Father Pascal says at last, ‘and Janna has survived it.’

Mother Magda laughs. ‘She has been so good. There is such real warmth there; so much love. She’s managed wonderfully well this week without Penny. Well, we all have. But, goodness, it’s a strain. Emily is exhausted. She does far too much.’

‘So much is expected of you all,’ he answers soberly. ‘Chi-Meur has always been a powerhouse of strength and prayer. Not long ago there were fifteen of you. Now there are four. Yet there is still that expectation.’

‘So many people need us. As the world grows noisier and busier and greedier, the requirement for silence and peace grows correspondingly. We are needed here.’

He nods. ‘I know it. And you have many good friends to help you, but it is not enough.’

She stands up and goes to the window. After a moment he joins her. Janna appears, walking quickly and lightly. She passes across the lawn and disappears from view in the direction of the path to the beach.

‘Escaping,’ says Mother Magda with a smile. ‘And who shall blame her? Not I.’

‘Nor I,’ agrees Father Pascal. ‘By the way, has this man who’s staying with the Trembaths been bothering you? Apparently he’s writing a book on the social history of north Cornwall, but old Jack is beginning to be suspicious of him.’