The False Martyr (78 page)

“
As you say, my dear,” the
innkeeper called back from the bar then whispered a message into
the ear of a boy at his side. “That, I would say, was cutting it a
bit too close, young sir,” he hollered at Teth. Several of the
inn’s other patrons had stopped their conversations now and were
staring. Teth felt real shame for the first time. Mrs. Tappers was
right, Dasen was probably in a state of panic – she was not sure if
she loved him or hated him for that. But the Tappers had been
honestly worried too. She remembered what Valati Lareno had said
about them and wondered if that concern could mean something
more.

“
You are in quite a
state,” Mrs. Tappers was saying. “Go to your room and get cleaned
up. I’m sure you’re starved. I’ll have a plate sent up. That is if
your sister lets you live that long.”

Teth looked at her, lower
lip creeping under her teeth. Was there any way to keep from seeing
Dasen? She could only imagine him clucking over her like a mother
hen. From Mrs. Tappers, it was endearing, from Dasen insufferable.
She could already picture his looks of disappointment, relief,
confusion.

“
Go on then,” Mrs. Tappers
nearly pushed her from the room. “Your sister is worried sick. I
know you don’t want to face her, but you can’t leave her like that.
Go on now.”

Mrs. Tappers led her into
the hall, around the open space that led from the inn’s common room
to the residences. “Come see me tomorrow morning,” she whispered in
Teth’s ear, the scent of her perfume encompassing her. “I think we
should talk. And remember what I told you, Dasen loves you no
matter what you’ve done or who you are. You are allowed to love him
back.” She pulled away. “Now, go see your sister. We’ll have some
food up to you in a bit.”

Teth felt her insides
shaking at the thought of Mrs. Tappers’ words.
I’m not allowed to love him
, was all
she could think.
And now these bastards
plan to betray us. They’ll give me my escape, exactly what I want,
then turn right around and trade Dasen like a cord of wood.
And that was the heart of her dilemma. She could
not think of a way to save him that did not require her to go with
him. Before, she had thought she could die and leave Dasen to fend
for himself with Kian and Lareno, but now that she knew their true
intent, she was trapped. The whole thing smacked of that old man in
his tower pulling her strings, trapping her the same way he had
throughout her entire life.

“
Where have you been?” a
rumbling voice broke her thoughts. Garth stepped from the hall that
led to the courtyard, arrested Teth, and pulled her into an
embrace. She was so shocked that she barely noticed the big man
crushing the life from her. “I am sorry I have been hard on you,”
he spoke into the top of her head. He was trying to be quiet, but
Teth guessed that the entire inn could hear. “You were progressing
so fast that I just kept pushing. I am sorry if it was too much.”
He let Teth go, held her shoulders in his massive hands. Teth had
no idea what to say.

Kian saved her the need.
He grabbed her from Garth grip, his own hand clamping on her arm
hard enough to bruise as he pulled her down the hall. He pushed her
against a wall and thought only then to check for watching eyes.
Seeing none, he turned on her, face inches from hers. “You will
never do that again, understood?” He moved his hand from her
shoulder to her neck, clasping the back with his strong fingers,
thumb under her chin to force her face toward his. He was strong,
his hands were big. With only the slightest shift, he could be
choking her. Teth gasped then glanced down to check the position of
his legs and her own, judging her ability to reach his groin with a
knee.

“
Don’t even think about
it. You ever kick me, you’ll regret it for a week.” He lifted her
with one hand and slammed her into the wall behind. “You may think
you’re a boy,” he whispered in her ear, rough stubble scratching
her cheek as she struggled to breathe. “But I know the truth, and
I’ll make sure you know it too. And I’ll make sure your husband
sees. I’ll make sure he hears you crying my name. It won’t be from
the pleasure that you’re screaming, but I doubt he’ll know the
difference.”

“
You wouldn’t dare,” Teth
hissed with the little air she had left.

“
Run away like that again
and see.” Kian strengthened his grip on her throat until she
thought she might black out.

“
Enough,” Garth rumbled.
And Kian was gone.

Teth crumpled to the
floor, hands on her throat. She choked and gasped for air as spots
raced before her eyes. When she recovered enough to see what was
happening, Kian was pinned against the opposite wall just as she
had been with Garth’s huge hand around his thick neck. “. . . .
will never treat a woman that way,” the Morg was saying, his face
nearly touching Kian’s. “If you touch her again, I will break your
neck. Do
you
understand?”

Teth watched Kian nod. His
teeth were clenched, his face was turning red, eyes bulging, but he
did not take them from Teth, did not hide his seething anger. Garth
cast him aside. He fell into a clump near the door to the Tappers’
private residence from which he’d emerged. Just then, Teth heard a
gasp from down the hall. A man and woman were standing there, jaws
agape, trying to shield their children’s eyes with their
hands.

“
A misunderstanding,” Teth
tried to cover. “This man thought I had given offense. My man
stepped in.” She rose to her feet and tried to straighten her
clothes though they were sweat soaked and crumpled beyond repair.
“I am truly sorry if I caused offense,” she told Kian, who was
likewise trying to find his feet. “Perhaps it is best if we simply
avoid one another going forward. As you can see, my man is quite
protective of me, and I would not want any harm to befall you.”
Teth tried to sound aloof as she spoke while keeping the point in
her tongue. If Kian ever touched her again, Garth wouldn’t be
needed. She’d kill him, herself.

“
As you wish,” Kian
nodded, lowered his head, and marched past without another
word.

“
Thank you, Garth,” Teth
said. “He caught me off guard. I am sorry that you had to be
involved in that.”

“
It is my duty, my . . . .
I mean, sir.” He bowed slightly then stared at the family until
they recovered enough to get the hint and keep moving. “I meant
what I said,” he whispered when they were alone again, hand on her
arm and back, gentle, reassuring, beard rubbing against her cheek
as he leaned toward her. “I . . . I am honor bound to protect you.
I will not let anyone hurt you. Will not allow anyone to mistreat
you.”

“
Thank you, Garth,” Teth
said and meant it. “I am sorry I disappeared. I just needed some
fresh air and time to think. It won’t happen again.”

“
You’re right in that. You
will not be outside of my sight again.”

“
Alright,” Teth nodded but
could not help the small smile that took her.

“
You will meet me in the
courtyard tomorrow after you have eaten. Now, go see your hu . . .
sister,” Garth said quickly and loudly as another couple walked
past the hall. “She is anxious to see you.”

Teth sighed then turned
back down the hall. The Morg followed her.

#

Dasen had given up
writing. He still held the pen, still stared at the page, still
hunched over the desk, but his thoughts were a blur, the sentence
he had been scribbling a memory, the argument lost to dreadful
anticipation. The boy had been gone for several minutes now, an
eternity. The tray he had brought filled the room with the smell of
roasted beef, barely, and greens. The message he had delivered
clouded Dasen’s mind with thoughts of Teth’s return.

He dreaded seeing her, he
realized. He could not believe it even as he thought it, but it was
true. It was almost like that first day in Randor’s Pass so long
ago, except then there had been the anticipation of what might be,
of the possibility that she would be everything he wanted. Now, he
knew what she was, or at least what she had become, leaving no hope
to blunt the dread.

He looked down at the
papers spread across the writing table. In the infinite boredom of
his seclusion, he had taken to an occupation that seemed a lifetime
gone. He was not even sure what he was writing or to what end, but
he felt a need to put his thoughts on paper even if they wandered
from speculation about the existence of the Exiles, to the most
efficient way to manage a massive shortage of food, to the nature
of the powers he had used outside Thoren. (His fingers still stung
from the flames that had encompassed those pages as soon as he
considered what would happen if anyone read them.) His most recent
writing, a letter to his father, was likely to face the same fate
as the treaties on his personal experience with the powers of
chaos.

The door opened. Teth’s
smell preceded her into the room. Dasen made a point of finishing
the sentence that he had given up on then set his pen down on the
table. Teth looked exactly like she should. Her clothes were marked
with sweat rings and mud. Her hair was matted to her head, making
it look dark. Salt crusted her face. How could he have ever
considered that attractive? – and still he did. His heart leapt at
seeing her. Even as he cursed himself for it, he wanted nothing
more than to hold her.

Neither of them said
anything for a long time. Teth closed the door behind her and
watched him. He had removed the wig by now and washed off the
makeup. He was wearing night clothes rather than the extravagant
dress. He wanted to say something to her but could not think what
it would be. The distance between them suddenly felt like the whole
of the Clouded Range.

“
I’m sorry I disappeared,”
Teth finally said. “I just needed to get out of here.” She chewed
her lip and fidgeted with her fingers.

“
I knew you’d be back. I
was . . . at first . . . .“ Dasen reconsidered. “I was hurt, Teth.
I was just trying to help you. I didn’t want you to get hurt.” His
voice rose, and he forced himself to be calm. “I get it that you
don’t want me around. I don’t know what I did to upset you, but I
get it. I’ll leave you alone. Is that what you want?”

To Dasen’s surprise, Teth
looked stunned. She took a step back, and for a second, he thought
she might cry – he might storm out if she did. “Yes,” she finally
managed, and though it was the word he expected, it stung like
nothing he had ever felt.

“
Fine,” he said back,
trying to maintain his distance. “I’ll stay as far away as I can.
You can . . . you can . . . .” he found himself suddenly choking on
the words. “You can do what you please. I’d give you the room if
there was another to share, but you’re hardly ever here anyway. Do
you want to take turns sleeping on the floor?” As a gentleman, he
had thought about giving up the bed entirely but decided that she
didn’t deserve it.

“
No. There’s plenty of
room. I’m . . . I’m sorry, Dasen. I don’t want to hurt you, but
this is probably for the best. I’m going to go clean up,
alright.”

“
Fine,” Dasen turned back
to the page. “I’m sorry, Teth. I really did think the Order had
brought us together for a reason.”

Teth’s only answer was a
sharp inhale. Dasen turned away, looking through the notes before
him. He could not see them for the blur that obscured his eyes. In
a few minutes, Teth was out the door, and Dasen was cursing his
foolish tears as he tried to keep them from ruining the paper
before him.

#

“
I guess I told you to
come early,” Mrs. Tappers yawned into her hand as she stood in the
doorway to her sitting room. The sun was barely lighting the sky,
but Teth had been awake for what felt like hours. She had supposed
that the innkeeper and his wife were always awake and available, as
if they were not real people, but rather fixtures like the chairs –
there to support their guests at any and all hours.

“
I’m . . . I’m sorry,”
Teth started embarrassed. Mrs. Tappers had clearly just climbed
from her bed. She wore a long white sleeping gown with a satin robe
pulled hastily over it. Her hair, still piled in its mountain, was
concealed by a cap. Her thick feet were bare, blue veins showing
through spotted skin, nails yellow and cracked. Her face, without
the cosmetics that were her hallmark, was rough and haggard, eyes
dark with bags, skin sallow, lips thick and grey. And without the
great dresses to give her shape, her body looked lumpy, thick, and
misshapen. In all, Teth could barely tell it was the same woman
that had hosted her here that first day.

“
Nonsense,” Mrs. Tappers
said then yawned mightily into her hand. “Why don’t you go down to
the kitchen and get us some of the pastries as they’re coming out
of the oven. Have the boys fry you some eggs and fish to go with
them. You still have a long way to go to build yourself back up.
While you’re doing that, I’ll get myself together. Then we can talk
while you eat. Agreed?”

Teth nodded, but Mrs.
Tappers barely waited for it before she was closing the door in her
face. As ordered, she wandered down to the kitchen and tried to
stay out of the way as a boy prepared her plate. “You can wait in
the other room, if you’d like,” the boy offered. “I’ll bring it out
to ya, my lord.”