The Fire Inside (11 page)

“Given the fact that you’ll be working at the
Academy, it doesn’t look like that will be possible. We should at
least talk about it.” He waited till Mitch left, then drove to the
Hidden Cove Inn. “Their bar is open until two. I doubt we’ll run
into anybody we know at this late hour.”

“We would at Badges.” The Hidden Cove hangout
for firefighters and police officers. “I always loved that
place.”

“You’ll get to see it more now, I
suppose.”

Once they were settled at the Inn, she
ordered a martini and he, a double scotch. “So,” he said turning to
her. “Mama Malvaso blackmailed you into staying in Hidden
Cove?”

Tess couldn’t hide a smile. “I guess so. Who
would have thought she had it in her?”

“She’s full of secrets.”

“My aunt?”

“Yeah. Did you notice how she got rid of
everybody but Will Rossettie tonight? He was the last one to go in,
and I’ll bet he stays until Mitch gets back.”

“What are you saying?”

“I think she’s sweet on him.”

“Seriously?”

“Yep.” The drinks arrived and Jack held up
his glass. “Let’s toast.”

“To putting the past behind us?”

He couldn’t read her tone. Holding her gaze,
he didn’t clink her glass. “Do you think we can do that?”

“We don’t have a choice.” She sipped her
martini and sighed. “I’m staying in town, and I’ll accept the job
with the recruit class. In four months, I’ll go back to Rockland.
Meanwhile, you and I can maintain a friendly relationship.”

“Even though you’re still pissed at me that I
didn’t call you or come back in February?”

Another sip. “I guess I am still upset about
that. You could have at least called me to tell me what happened.”
She shook her head. “Except that you thought it was a one-night
stand, so why would you?”


“Calling what happened between us a one-night
stand was a knee-jerk reaction. I didn’t see it that way.”

When she gave him a dark, disbelieving look,
he set his glass down, then took hers out of her hand. They were in
a very private booth in the back; he turned her to face him. Leaned
in. She started to protest, but his mouth was on hers, hard,
demanding. He took, partly with anger at their situation, partly
with passion. Her hands went to his chest, and instead of pulling
away, she fisted them in his white captain’s shirt. He moved in
closer and angled his head; his tongue parted her lips and demanded
entry. She opened like a flower blooming in the sun and seemed to
lose herself the contact.

When they drew apart, they were both
breathing hard.

“Now, that should answer any doubt you have
about how I feel about you.”

Tess took a bigger sip of her drink. “All it
shows is that we’re attracted to each other.”

“Are you kidding? I’ve thought about doing
that for weeks. I wanted to call a hundred times. Fuck it, Teresa,
I told you all this. I didn’t do it because I didn’t want Mitch to
find out what happened between us.”

“Why, Jack? I don’t understand that. Surely
you don’t think he’d beat you up or something like that.”

“No. But the reason
is
selfish. I
don’t have many friends. Because of what I do—counsel so many of
the guys—I have to stay professional with the firefighters. But
Mitch is different. Since I helped him out eight years ago, our
friendship has become very important to me. I didn’t want to lose
that.”

“So you choose him over me?”

Jack ran a hand through his hair. Had he done
that? “Hell.”

She took pity on him. “Look, Jack. I love
Mitch. I want you to be his friend, and maybe what we did together
would affect that. But at least admit what you did.”

“I admit it. Though I never saw it that
way.”

“Fine. Now we can go on from here.”

“Seeing each other?”

“No. That ship has sailed. I’m not sure I
could ever trust you again. In any case, I’m taking the Academy
job, so we’re bound to clash when you psychoanalyze the recruits. A
relationship between us would compromise us both.”

She made his head spin with her comments
about choosing Mitch and now the language she used about the
recruits. “I won’t be psychoanalyzing them!”

“Whatever. Either way, we’ll be at odds.
You’re going to have to settle for being friends.”

“And at work, if we disagree?”

“Friends can disagree. We’ll be mature.”

He didn’t want to accept that. But what
choice did they have? She was right.

When he let her off at her car later, and she
looked over at him, Jack was hit by a premonition: that they were
letting go of something that might have been very rare and very
precious.

o0o

Sabina’s bedroom smelled the same as it
always had—sachet made of rose petals. The scent brought back
memories of when Tess had first come to live in this house. She’d
been a distraught teenager who’d lost her rudder. How many times
had she laid in this bed and cuddled with her head on Sabina’s
bosom and cried about her parents’ death? Joey had isolated
himself, but Tess took comfort from others. Then, at least. After
Joey died, she shied away from getting too close to people.

“What are you thinking,
bambino
?”

From her place on the other side of the bed,
seated cross-legged, Tess smiled at the old name. “How you took
care of me after Mom and Dad died. You’d lost your only sister, and
you helped
us
.”

“As Rosa would have wanted.” Sabina took her
hand. “You were so sad it broke my mother’s heart.”

Glancing out the window, Tess hoped the warm
April breeze would soothe her, but it didn’t. “I should have paid
more attention to Joey.”

Shadows darkened Sabina’s face. “I could not
reach him. Gus and the boys tried, too.”

Tess couldn’t speak around the lump in her
throat.

“You were different after he died.”

“I know. I’m sorry I wasn’t here to see you
more.”

“None of that. Except to say I am so happy
you will be with me now.”

“Me, too.” She glanced at her watch. “You
need to rest.”

“I would like to help you cook.”

“No way on earth are you cooking this week.
I’ll be taking care of you until I start at the Academy.”

A broad smile from Sabina. “I love you,
Teresa.”

The use of her full name reminded her of
Jack. And how he’d kissed her senseless in the bar two nights ago.
She stood. “I love you, too. I’ll call you when supper’s
ready.”

“Can I see my little girl when she comes
home?”

“Sabby? Of course. You just have to rest, not
sleep.”

At three o’clock, Tess met Sabby at the
school bus stop. As she descended from the vehicle, Tess realized
this was another thing she’d missed out on—her cousins’ kids. Sabby
was seven and tall for her age. She had that lovely combination of
Megan’s steel-blond hair and Mitch’s dark eyes. When she saw Tess,
her face lit from within and she raced over.

Sabby reached for a hug, and Tess bent down.
Having her own flesh and blood’s arms around her felt good. “Hi,
honey. Have a good day at school?”

“Hi, Tess. I got an A on my spelling
test.”

“Good for you.” They strode up the walk.
“How’s Nana?”

“Resting. You know she’s going to be fine,
right?”

“Daddy told me that. He never lies.”

Hmm. “Maybe not now. But I could tell you
some fibs he told when he was little and I used to play with him
and Uncle Zach and your two aunts.”

A devilish look on Sabby’s face reminded Tess
of Zach. “Cool.”

“Come on.” Tess tugged her faster. “I made
you cookies. After you visit with Grandma, I’ll have one with you
and we can talk about Daddy.”

o0o

“What do you think, Jenn? Her sauce as good
as Mama’s?”

Mitch, seated at the head of the table,
winked at his mother. Tess had offered to cook for all the
siblings, but only Jenn and Paulie could come over. Grady, too, who
right now was busy in the living room settling a dispute with their
twins, Bella and Ben. Their other daughter, Angel, was at the end
of the table, whispering in cahoots with Sabby.

Jenn sneered at her brother. “It’s wonderful,
Tess. I hate to cook but love this sauce.” Its spicy scent filled
the air.

“I think it’s terrific.” Paulie held up a
fork of rigatoni and shot Tess a sideways glance. “Maybe she
defrosted some of Mama’s.”

“I won’t even deign to answer that.”

A high-pitched scream from the twins. Jenn
started to stand. “I’ll go help Grady.”

“No, you worked all day. I just watched the
soaps with your mother.” Tess rose and headed to the living
room.

Ben, who looked like Grady, with dirty blond
hair and blue eyes, and Bella, with Jenn’s dark looks, were seated
at a table for tots, glaring at each other.

“What’s going on in here?” Tess asked.

Grady looked up from where he knelt down with
them. His face was lined with fatigue; she knew his house had four
fires today.

“Children aren’t allowed at the dining room
table if they’re mad at each other or their parents.”

Hunching down next to Grady, she zeroed in on
the kids. “Did you guys know that was a rule when I lived
here?”

“It’s stupid.” This from Ben.

She hid a smile. “Go, eat, Grady. I’ll
arbitrate.”

He didn’t have to be asked twice. Grady
bolted up and strode out.

Bella said, “Brothers are stupid.”

Out of nowhere, acute pain gripped Tess’s
heart.

As if the little girl read Tess’s mind,
five-year old Bella asked, “You got a brother, Tess?”

“I, um, did.”

“Where is he?” Ben asked.

“He, um, went to heaven.” It sounded dumb,
but she wasn’t sure what Jenn had taught her kids.

“You mean he died?” Ben again.

“Yes.”

“Daddy says death might not be so bad.
Everybody dies.”

“I think that’s probably true, Bella.”

“You feel bad he’s dead?” Again the girl
showed remarkable insight.

“I do. I wish I could see him again.”

Ben stared at Bella. Bella stared at Ben.
Tess hadn’t meant to teach them a lesson, just give Grady a
respite. But Bella apparently took her situation to heart. “Sorry,
Ben.”

“Sorry.” Ben’s words were begrudging, but
they were said.

Tess stood. “Good, let’s go eat now.”

o0o

Feeling restless, Jack rang the doorbell of
the Malvasos’ house. He hadn’t seen Tess since Sabina came home
four days ago. Since he’d kissed Tess in the restaurant. Since
she’d said they should just be friends. Problem was, he’d admitted
to himself he wanted a relationship with her, despite how Mitch
might react. But in some ways, she was right. There could be
professional issues because of his class with the recruits. As he
waited for her to answer, he recalled what he’d told patients to do
in circumstances like this. Accept it, and move on. Date
others.

But the thought of dating anyone else fled
from his mind when the door opened. Tess wore a simple pair of gray
shorts, a white T-shirt and sneakers. Nothing fancy. And her hair
was a little damp. Acute desire shot through him at the sight of
her.

“Hi,” she said easily. “Did you come to see
Sabina?”

“And to find out how you’re doing.”

“I’m good. You?”

They sounded like strangers who’d met on the
street. He shifted on his feet. “I hate the stilted tone between
us.”

“I know. Come on in. Being with Sabina will
make you more comfortable.”

When Sabina saw him, her eyes brightened. “My
favorite doctor.”

“My favorite woman in the world.”

They smiled at each other. He’d come to love
Mama Malvaso, too.

Sabina said, “Sit with us, Tess.”

“No thanks. I’m going for a run.”

“I’ll be here when you come back.” Jack took
a chair next to Sabina and opened a bag he’d carried inside. “I
brought you some mysteries to read.”

“My favorites.”

“Let me tell you which ones I like best.”

By the time Tess returned, Jack and Sabina
were talking about books and characters and plot lines. For an
uneducated woman, Sabina was one smart cookie. He was in the
kitchen, waiting for Tess, when he saw a list on the table.

Get groceries.

Clean Sabina’s room.

Get gas for drive to Rockland.

The back door had opened and Tess came
inside. “Hi, again.”

He looked up from the list. “You going to
Rockland tomorrow?”

“Uh-huh. I’ll need my uniforms for the
recruit class. And some clothes, other personal stuff. Zach’s off
and he’s going to stay with his mother.”

“Anyone going with you?”

“No. Casey offered, but I said no.”

“Why?”

She bit her lip. “I, um…” She shook her head.
“Personal stuff to take care of.”

A very unpleasant thought came to his head.
“You aren’t…you aren’t seeing some guy, are you?”

“I told you in February that I wasn’t seeing
anybody.”

His relief was intense. “Yeah, that’s right.
In any case, I could go with you, honey.”

Her eyes widened, and he realized what he’d
said.

“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have called you that.
But honestly, Tess, I can make myself free.”

“Are you always this protective? I’m a grown
woman and can drive four hours up to Rockland.”

“I’m not protective of everybody.” Even as he
said the words, he knew them to be mostly untrue. “I have feelings
for you, Tess.”

“Thanks for the offer, but no. I can do this
on my own.”

“Friends help friends.”

“Will you stop?”

He should. He was being stupid. “Just be
careful, then.”

o0o

Since the weather could turn on a dime in
upstate New York, Tess had left Hidden Cove in the sunshine and hit
drizzle halfway up. Now the air was misty and gray. No matter.
She’d held fast to this ritual for years.

The headstones read: Rosa Campisi Righetti.
Anthony Righetti and Joseph Anthony Righetti. Dates of birth and
death. Beloved mother, wife, father, husband, son, brother. Joey
had never gotten married. He’d died at twenty-four, but he’d
been having too much fun
he’d said, to find a woman to share
his life with.