The Gate of Heaven (20 page)

Leah, who was watching the scene, waited until Jacob disappeared into his tent, and then she hurried over to her father. She was taller than he was, for age had stooped him. She was also stronger in every way, physically and emotionally. “You old fool!” she hissed. “You're losing your mind!”

Laban ducked his head and whimpered, “Don't you talk to your father that way! It's not respectful.”

“Why should I respect you? Jacob's right. All you do is drink and sleep all day. You never give Jacob any help, and you never say a word to Lomach and Benzar. Those pitiful sons of yours! You should have taken a stick to them years ago. The three of you are absolutely worthless!”

Laban began to whine in self-pity. “I can't help it. I'm an old man. I can't work—”

“Be quiet! Are you so drunk you don't know that if it weren't for Jacob, we'd be beggars? He's the one who, for years, has stayed out and done the work while you and your sons have loafed and consorted with harlots.”

As her tongue lashed at him, Laban glanced around, noting that everyone was listening. The worst of it was that he knew Leah was right. In his more lucid moments, he recognized that Jacob was the one who had brought prosperity to his family. He hated to admit this, but now he knew he was going to have to pacify Jacob. “You don't think he'll really refuse to work, do you?”

“Yes, I do, and I don't blame him! You might as well get ready to go take care of the flocks yourself—you and your boys.”

“But I'm too old for that!”

“You're not too old to make a fool out of yourself!”

Alarmed, Laban said, “Now, Leah, listen. I know I was harsh, but I didn't mean it.”

“You think that's going to mean anything to Jacob? It wouldn't surprise me if he took Rachel and me and the children away.
Then
see how long you'd last! You'd have nothing.”

Laban's face broke then, and he clawed his beard anxiously. “Wait a minute now, Leah. I was too harsh. Be nice to him.”

“I always am. You're the one who mistreats him. I've begged him to leave you, and I hope he does. We have to do all the work.”

Laban realized he had gone too far. He cleared his throat and took his daughter by the arm. He had to look up into her face, and he pleaded, “Leah, don't be so cruel to your old father.” He smirked then and said, “Be nice to Jacob. Fix him some good food and get him into bed. You seem to be good at that.”

Leah stared at her father. “You are a pitiful old man!”

“You can do it, Leah. You get him in a good mood, and tomorrow I'll do something nice for him.”

Jacob was sitting in his tent seething over the harsh scene with Laban. He looked up when Leah came in.

“Your father is an idiot,” he spat.

“I know it, Jacob. He's old and doesn't know what he's doing half the time.” She came over and ran her hand through his hair. “You're absolutely filthy. I've cooked a lamb just the way you like it, with all the fixings. Would you like to clean up first or eat first?”

“Let's eat. I'm starved.”

“You stay right here, and I'll bring your food. We'll have a good meal together.”

Jacob nodded, and soon Leah was back. He began to eat the olives and kemach bread, and afterward the lamb that had been boiled in sour milk; then he washed it all down with a fruity wine Leah had saved for him. He ate until he could eat no more.

Then Leah said, “You're so dirty.”

“Who wouldn't be after two days out in the desert with those filthy sheep?”

Leah began to remove his clothing, then brought a deep basin of water and began to wash him. Her hands were strong, and Jacob started to relax. She washed his body, then his hair, afterward anointing it with sweet oil.

She even washed his feet, and Jacob grew sleepy.

“Now, do you feel better?”

“Yes, I do. But your father…I don't know what to do with him.”

“We'll think of something. Come to bed now.”

Jacob lay down, and Leah settled down beside him. The warm food and the washing had relaxed him, and now she began to rub her hands over his face. She whispered, “You're my sweet husband, and I'm your obedient wife.” She moved against him, and he could not see her smiling in the darkness. She knew she always had power over him at times like this, and even though Rachel might be the Beloved Wife, she was the one who had given him sons. Besides, she knew how to comfort him in ways that no other woman could.

Rachel had watched the scene between her father and Jacob. She had started for him too, but Leah had reached him first. Then Rachel had seen Leah follow Jacob into his tent and knew she could not interfere. She watched as Leah brought food and fresh water and then she stood there as the lamp in the tent went out. Turning, she went to her own tent and found Bilhah there, making a shirt for Judah. When Bilhah looked up and saw the expression on Rachel's face, she put the sewing down at once. “What's wrong, mistress?”

“Nothing.”

“Yes, there is. I can tell. Are you troubled because Jacob had a fight with your father?”

“No.”

Bilhah was puzzled. She was a simple girl, not particularly attractive, but warmhearted. She had large, warm brown eyes—her best feature—and was totally devoted to Rachel. “It's Leah, then, isn't it?”

Rachel shot a quick glance at Bilhah and then bitterness tinged her speech. “She gives him sons, and I give him nothing!”

“No. That's not so.” Bilhah came and put her arms around Rachel. “He loves you the best. He calls you the Beloved Wife. You know he loves you best.”

But Rachel would not be comforted. She went to bed that night and could not keep back the tears as she thought of Leah with Jacob.

“Where's Rachel?” Jacob asked Bilhah as she passed by. He had not gone to the fields the next day but had rested in the camp, and now the late afternoon sun was going down. “I haven't seen her all day,” Jacob said.

Bilhah said with some surprise, “Well, I haven't either. I thought maybe she was with you.”

“No. I don't know where she is.” Jacob got up immediately and began to search the camp. No one had seen her, it seemed, and he began to worry. Suddenly a thought occurred to him, so he left the camp and made his way through the scrub brush over the sands until he came to the small familiar stream. He followed its winding curves until he came to the clump of trees that overshadowed it. As he approached, he caught a glimpse of bright color inside the thicket of trees and felt a gush of relief. Making his way through the bushes, he came upon Rachel, sitting with her feet tucked under her, staring out over the stream.

“Rachel, here you are!” He went over and sat down beside her. “I was worried.”

Jacob waited for her to speak, but she turned her face away. He heard her give a little sob, and he reached around and put his hand on her cheek. When he turned her face to his, he saw that her cheeks were tearstained. “Why, Rachel, what's wrong?”

“Oh, Jacob, everything is wrong!” She fell against him and began to weep great sobs, and he held her, making comforting noises and stroking her hair.

When her sobs abated, he said, “Now, tell me what's wrong.”

“Jacob, do you ever pray for me to have a child?”

Jacob had suspected this is what had brought grief to Rachel. “Yes, I do, all the time,” he said. His brow furrowed, and he shook his head sadly. “But you know God hasn't spoken to me, not since I left home. It was such a wonderful thing, Rachel, when I saw the angels on that stairway, and God made such amazing promises.” His voice grew sadder, and he bit his lower lip. “He promised me wonderful things, but they don't seem to be happening.”

Rachel looked up at him. “Do you doubt the Lord?”

“No,” Jacob said firmly. “But I know His time is not like ours. I don't think time concerns Him at all.”

“How can that be?”

“I don't know.” Jacob shrugged. “I don't think there ever was any beginning, and there never will be any end. But you and I and all humans, we're caught in time—like someone caught in a river. Yesterday is gone. We're sitting in the middle of today. Tomorrow may come if we live. We can't think any other way, but I don't believe that the Almighty is like that. He just always
is
.”

Rachel lay quietly in his half embrace. She loved it when he talked to her like this. Finally she said, “It's hard to believe, isn't it?”

“It is when you can't really see anything happening.” But he shook his head and shoulders and said, “But God will be faithful.”

“I don't know why God is silent. Why doesn't He talk to us all the time?” Rachel whispered. “I've prayed to Him until I can't stand to hear my own prayers.”

“I know what you mean, but we must not give up.”

“Jacob?”

“What?”

“I've been thinking about something.”

“What is it?”

“I'm not sure that I should say.”

“Rachel,” Jacob said tenderly, “a husband and wife should not have any secrets. I want to tell you all that's on my heart, and I want you to do the same for me.”

“All right,” Rachel said slowly. “I've been thinking…that you should take Bilhah as your concubine.”

Jacob had expected anything but this. “Why would I do that?”

“You know the custom, Jacob. If a woman's bondservant has a child, it belongs to the mistress. The child would be mine in all but blood. It's the only way I can give you a son, Jacob.”

Jacob was stunned. He had never thought of such a thing. He didn't like the idea in the least, but she was insistent, and finally he said, “I'll think about it.”

“Please. I would have a baby to hold and to raise. It would be
our
son.”

“What about Bilhah?”

“She would do it for me. I know she would.”

“She'd have to, I suppose. But I wouldn't want to force her. She would have to agree.”

“Then you will think about it?”

“Yes, I will. But no matter what happens, you're still the Beloved Wife.”

“Oh, Jacob, I love you so much!”