THE HAPPY HAT (16 page)

Chapter 26

Testing All

Bizetes briefed Boris Mindel of what Remo suspected. The needle biopsy of the cast in Perkins’ laundry bag was positive for heroin plus plaster. “As my chief and senior chemist Mr. Mindel, how can I tell whether Abe Linsky is in this with Amstel Perkins?”

Mindel pondered the query. Dire consequences would be forthcoming for both Linsky and Perkins if they were indeed diverting cartel profits. “I’ll ask for urine checks for everyone. If either of those two are kitchen chemists they might be sloppy and absorb some of the heroin. The urine drug screen for heroin is molecular sensitive. Our people here use masks, gloves and we have our ventilation air evacuation system on at all times. They should come up negative.”

“Better include you and me in the testing. Make it look like a routine check from our upper cartel bosses. If they’re fucking with us, I don’t won’t them to get squirrely and disappear.” Bizetes pointed to a calendar. “Make it this Saturday. Everyone will be here.”

‡

Saturday was three days after Perkins and Linsky had processed a shoulder spica cast at Linsky’s place. It was only twelve hours since Perkins had used the kitchen in his apartment to repeat the heroin extraction on a long leg cast he had secreted from G-3. While the heroin was easy to leach out of the gypsum plaster calcium sulfate it was labor intensive and was a two-person operation at minimum. Perkins worked alone. He did don a mask, rubber gloves, and plastic apron. He also used the stove-top fan to evacuate the fumes from the boiling water-plaster emulsion. It wasn’t anywhere near the high capacity ventilation fan used in Linsky’s kitchen although Perkins assumed it was adequate. The net result was Perkins inhaled heroin tainted air in his apartment and the moisture laden with heroin molecules got into his clothes. This, in turn, could be absorbed through the skin. The amount of heroin absorbed by Perkins was not enough to give him any drug effect. His body would merely metabolize the heroin and eliminate it via a urinary pathway–but it was absorbed. Traces of heroin metabolites remain in the body for up to five days and can be detected in tiny amounts with the new mass spectrograph units.

Both Linsky and Perkins questioned Saturdays “spot check” urine drug screen.

“Why now?” Linsky focused on Mindel.

“That’s what a random spot check is–random. The order comes from higher up. Look, we don’t question this shit. We just give up a urine sample. We all work in this lab with the same equipment and the same precautions against sucking up some of the cooked heroin. If our system is faulty then all of us will have a positive urine.” Mindel sounded matter-of-fact and handed out urine specimen bottles. He gave them to everyone present including Bizetes and two janitor clean-up guys. “Everyone gets one. Oh, and notice the colored line on the pee bottle. That’s a temperature indicator. All specimens have to be 93-degrees or higher or you pee again. No one can give us tap water or Mountain Dew from the soda machine.”

The urine specimens were obtained and everyone got down to work processing the huge amount of plaster casts harvested from Queens Naval and collected by the civilian contractors.

At the end of the day Mindel made his second announcement. “Listen up everyone. We all get to give up a second specimen at the end of our work day to test today’s lab technique and our system’s integrity. We’ll have the results on Tuesday. Everyone gets their pay after they pee today.”

‡

Linsky and Perkins left the lab and stopped at their cars parked in adjacent spaces outside the old warehouse building. Linsky turned to Perkins.

“Hey Perk don’t look so worried. We passed these tests before. My kitchen lab is as sealed as this place.”

“All it takes is someone who doesn’t like us to add some heroin shit to our piss cups.” Perkins had his hand on his car’s door handle. “I mean, don’t you think it’s strange to have another test so close to the last one. Usually they’re four months apart and the last test was six weeks ago.”

“It’s cartel fear tactics. Don’t worry about it.” Linsky slapped him on the shoulder.

‡

During the Saturday daylight hours while Perkins and Linsky were sweating in the Brooklyn heroin-leaching lab two teams of two men each gained access to both Perkins’ and Linsky’s apartments. They were armed with plastic bags and vacuum cleaners.

The men were meticulous and methodical. They vacuumed all furniture and even bedclothes placing the suctioned dust and debris in separate labeled plastic bags. Waste baskets were emptied and the insides vacuumed. The waste basket contents were placed in plastic bags and shaken vigorously. The trash was then removed and returned to the waste baskets. Dirty laundry got the same waste basket treatment.

Mindel’s orders from higher-ups were to check for heroin residue and any microscopic calcium sulfate–plaster dust.

‡

Norman was walking hand-in-hand with Zettler heading toward the Queens Naval Hospital Officer’s Club for Saturday dinner. Norman gave her hand a squeeze with his words.

“Life is good. The American part of the Vietnam conflict is over. Rumor now has it that it will take only a year to receive all foreign shore casualties.”

While Dr. Paul Norman was an optimist Minnie Zettler was not. “You’re still thinking we could both get an early out. I doubt it Paul. We owe the Navy two more years. We’re short staffed now and with decreasing to no air-evacs we’ll still be short staffed until the hospital gets down to half-full. The VA system is saturated and Queens Naval like all other military hospitals will be backed-up for at least a year-and-a-half.”

“The Navy is used to getting more work from less people. Hell, it’s been like that in the civilian sector forever. I heard it from a slightly drunk MSC Officer from the CO’s table at the O-Club two nights ago when you had night duty.” Norman held the door open for her.

“Feel that heat. The O-Club is always overheated in the winter and over-cooled in the summer. Anyway it’s better than the cold weather we’ve been having lately.” She handed the NCO Corpswave her coat at the check-room and waited for Norman to do the same.

They were seated near the band that was a quintet combination of hospital corpsmen and hospital patients. They were playing “Those Were the Days”. The singer was a patient Norman recognized. “The drummer is a minimum care unit patient. He was a tunnel-rat over in Nam.”

“I’ll bet he’s glad he’s not over there anymore squeezing in-and-out of booby trapped Vietnamese tunnel sites.” Zettler looked from the band to the menu. “What did you mean life is good now?”

“I feel like I’m less stressed out in the ward and the ER. Ike Kaplan is running G-1 like clockwork and that G-3 Corpsman Perkins runs triage for air-evacs when I’m JMOOD.”

They both ordered a light Rose wine. Zettler noticed LT Sparrow with a bachelor LT (JG) Pharmacist. “And what about Sparrow? The nurse is supposed to run the ward not the corpsman.”

“I think Sparrow has the hots for Kaplan. She practically drools whenever she gets near him. She gives him the run of the place.”

“Kaplan is not your usual gopher corpsman I’ll admit. But Sparrow usually reserves her lust for the officers–so I’m told by my nurse friends at the BOQ.” Zettler sipped her wine and they placed their dinner orders. “Anyway let’s focus on us. They’re playing my favorite Tony Bennett dance tune–‘When Joanna Loved Me’. So let’s dance while they cook our supper.”

The tunnel rat patient actually sounded like Tony Bennett and Zettler let her head rest on Norman’s shoulder thinking about life after the Navy.

Norman inhaled her jasmine essence and thought more about Ike Kaplan. Kaplan really isn’t like any corpsman he’d ever met. The guy has a command presence.
I have to talk with Kaplan about what he’s going to do after the Navy.
He’d make a good surgeon with his ability to get people around him to take orders without question.

‡

Bizetes sat across from Mindel’s desk. It was Tuesday and the lab data from the warehouse heroin processing urines were in. Mindel had two folders. The one to his right held the results of the urine checks and the one to his left contained the gypsum data and the heroin sweep results from both Linsky’s and Perkins’ apartments.

“Give me the heroin urines from the Saturday morning samples first.” Bizetes leaned closer to the desktop.

Mindel used a clear plastic ruler to go from the name of the person to the lab value. “All negatives except one for the morning collection.” Mindel looked up. “Perkins had a dirty urine. He’s either using the stuff or he’s hustling us like Remo suspects and the needle test from Remo is real.”

“What about the evening urines for Perkins?”

“Still the only positive at the same trace levels. It’s more in keeping with skin absorption or inhaling dust from an extraction process.”

Bizetes reddened. “Perkins-that motherfucker. What about Linsky?”

“Linsky’s clean.”

“Well that’s a relief. Give me the plaster sweep data–Perkins first.”

“Perkins had positive samples for calcium sulfate from every sample. He must have had dust everywhere. But then again he’s an orthopedic corpsman dealing with the stuff every day in the hospital.” Mindel took a deep breath. “What we need for confirmation is to check out another orthopedic corpsman’s pad. We need to do a sweep of someone who has the same hospital exposure as Perkins–someone not with our operation. However…” Mindel pushed back from the desk. “…however, Linsky’s place was loaded with gypsum powder too.”

Chapter 27

Kaplan and Skagan

“Boomer Stiles is long overdue for getting that cast off. I know about his syphilitic romp like everyone else but treatment is less than a week with high dose penicillin.” Skagan was looking at Kaplan but speaking to Dr. Norman.

“Our rate-limiting step here is the OR. Captain Darmin won’t put Boomer on the schedule until after the last molecule of penicillin is delivered.” Norman raised the amplitude of his last words to get her to turn from Kaplan.

“I hear you Dr. Norman. You don’t have to raise your voice.” Skagan looked at LT Sparrow who was cowering behind Norman. “I’ve had such encounters with Captain Darmin before. Get a stat infectious disease consult clearing Boomer as having non-viable germs and together we’ll get his cast off by Monday next week.”

Norman felt the words directed at Sparrow. Everyone at Queens Naval knew about Sparrow and Dr. Buzzby Brisbane. LT Dina Sparrow and Brisbane had been having a torrid biological affair for the past month. A dental tech had actually fainted when she walked in on them screwing their brains out in the Dirty Linen Room. The naïve tech was brought to the ER where JMOOD Dr. Paul Norman had to revive her and got the story. Norman stepped aside to face Sparrow.

“LT Sparrow would you please personally get Dr. Brisbane to see Boomer Stiles today? Tell him I want his infectious disease clearance on Boomer to coincide with the last dose of penicillin. And he’s to hand deliver a copy today to Captain Darmin in the OR. If you have any problems with this have him call me.”

Skagan placed her hands on her hips and stuck up her chest in a triumphant posture. “Add my name to Dr. Norman’s action item on this matter. Dr. Brisbane will not want to cross swords with me.” She turned around and walked slowly away. The back of her hand slowly brushed against Kaplan’s ass but only Kaplan appreciated the action.

‡

When rounds had been completed Kaplan went to the cast room and closed the door. He called Adam Stokely. “Adam it’s QNH O1.”

Stokely pressed the encryption button. No one would be able to decipher his words as Queens Naval Hospital Operative One. “Proceed.”

“First, Sergeant Stiles will be getting his cast removed. It’ll coincide with the end-of-the month cast pickups by the civilian bio-disposal group. Number two is I really haven’t been able to find any link between LCDR Skagan and internal or external narcotic cartel movements.”

“The Navy hospital has cartel payroll people. We were able to compile a list of people of interest. There is one Navy nurse whose bank account like those of two Navy enlisteds has been escalating well above Department of Navy income.”

“Stiles’ total-body cast is probably harboring a half-million dollars’ worth of heroin. Once it’s in my G-1 cast lock-up for the monthly disposal pick-up I’m sure we’ll have civilian cartel guards posing as civilians. It gives us two weeks to plan something.” Kaplan kept his eyes on the cast room door in case any unwanted listeners inadvertently came in.

“I have more news for you Ike. We have an undercover agent within the New York City heroin organization. Apparently there’s some diversion going on within Queens Naval Hospital regarding some Viet Nam plaster not reaching the pick-up crew.”

Kaplan was incredulous. “What? That’s impossible. I have records of every cast received and every bit of plaster is accounted for right up to the time of civilian disposal crew pick-up.”

“Our agent tells us there are Nam applied casts which are removed that do not reach your ward for accountability. Someone on the staff is bypassing the collection system and it has to be from one of orthopedic wards other than yours on G-1.”

“Let me think about this. I’ll research every avenue of how this could be done. One thing’s for sure it has to happen when the casts are first removed from recent air-evacs.” Kaplan’s pulse was racing. He needed help on this and he knew only one person who might help–LCDR Philomena Skagan. “I’ll get back to you ASAP on this.”

Kaplan reviewed the entire orthopedic air-evac process. He couldn’t fathom how a cast could bypass the rigid system so meticulously monitored by Skagan. He paged her.

The phone rang immediately. “Chief Corpsman Kaplan. How can I help you?”

“This is LCDR Skagan. You paged me?”

“A problem has surfaced with the cast disposal and has come to my attention. I have to talk with you right away and in private.”
How can I do this without breaking my FBI cover?

‡

Senior Corpsman Achilles Spinelli was assigned to select an orthopedic corpsman at random to acquire out-of-hospital domestic samples for gypsum analysis. He had no difficulty finding enlisted staff who maintained an off-hospital residence. Spinelli selected a senior corpsman from G-5. He gave the name and address to Bizetes who relayed the information to several “cleaners”. The G-5 corpsman’s apartment was vacuumed from floor-to-ceiling and all clothing, including those to be laundered, had dust sucked up for analysis.

Bizetes had pressure from New York City bosses to finalize the situation and present a plan for eliminating whoever was stealing from the cartel in an exemplary manner. Bizetes called Mindel.

“Do you have the results?” The question was more of an immediate demand.

“I do. I ran heroin checks along with control samples of calcium sulfate just to be sure our system was working.”

“Fine. Fine. I don’t really give a fuck about the science here. What about the G-5 corpsman for Christ’s sake?”

“First there was no trace of heroin. That means that our heroin monitoring is credible.” Mindel took a deep breath.

“Look you motherfucker; get to what we really need here. I have upper management at my throat for answers–today.”

Mindel grinned. “We did find traces of gypsum almost everywhere in the apartment especially on the dirty clothes in the laundry hamper.”

“Okay, I want your conclusions. Give them to me slowly. I’m writing everything down.”

“Finding the gypsum presence means the person was working with cast material. We expected it from the G-5 corpsman who works with plaster casts every day. We therefore expect it from Perkins in a similar distribution. However, Perkins apartment should not have had heroin traces anywhere.”

“That pig fucker. What about Linsky?”

Mindel inhaled. His next words would be a matter of life and death for Linsky. If Mindel didn’t interpret the report correctly someone else would and Mindel’s head would be on the chopping block. “Linsky had no heroin from his apartment environment. But…” Mindel swallowed hard. “…the calcium sulfate presence should not have been there. Linsky is not exposed to plaster casts on a daily basis. Linsky must be processing casts and using appropriate heroin sequestration technique. The only source of heroin plaster is Queens Naval Hospital and he’s in fast company with Perkins. My impression is both Linsky and Perkins are fucking with us. They’re both getting heroin plaster from Queens Naval but…” Mindel had to quell his dry mouth with a drink of water.

The pause brought Bizetes shouting into the phone again, “But…what…you motherfucker?”

“Sorry. My mouth was dry. I had to sip some water.” Mindel wiped his sweaty brow. “It appears Perkins is also doing some heroin plaster processing on his own. If Linsky’s urine is heroin clean it means Perkins urine is heroin clean if he’s assisting with Linsky’s processing technique. However, Perkins on his own is sloppy and therefore his domicile was positive for both heroin and gypsum. Perkins dirty urine was not from Linsky’s operation but from his own. They’re both running separate heroin cast diversions on us.”

“Dead. They’re both dead men.” Bizetes knew what he had to do. “Don’t leak this information out to anyone. I have to run financial checks and find out how they’re selling the heroin.”

‡

Skagan had no alternative but to meet with Kaplan in the hospital. This was hospital business and both Kaplan and she were the main administrators of the Vietnam plaster cast disposal. Their meeting would in no way be construed as Officer-Enlisted fraternization. “Get someone to cover for you and come to my office. I‘ll be there in thirty minutes.”

The other ward corpsmen were at lunch. Only LT Sparrow was at the Nurses Station.

“LT Sparrow, LCDR Skagan wants me stat to go over an irregularity with the Vietnam plaster. The other corpsmen will be back in half-an-hour.” Kaplan’s request was delivered with urgency and as an order from Skagan. Sparrow went white.

“Trouble with the casts? What kind of trouble? I have to know. I’m charge nurse on G-1.” She clutched his forearm.

“I won’t know until I see her. If you want you can go in my place but she insisted I go there immediately.” Kaplan removed her hand.

“Me? Meet alone with Skagan. Are you nuts? Go. Go. But come back as soon as you can and tell me what’s going on. I have to know what you know. I’m the nurse after all.”

Kaplan’s forearm was moist from Sparrow’s sweaty palm.
What does she have to be so fearful for? Skagan isn’t really a wicked witch.
Kaplan took the elevator to the fifth floor of the central main hospital building and knocked on Skagan’s office door.

“Enter.”

The room was small, windowless and furnished with a Navy gray metal desk, high-back gray desk chair plus two Navy gray armless chairs in front of her desk.

“Sit down Ike and tell me what’s going on.”

Kaplan had been thinking rapidly about how to broach the problem. “Phil, some plaster from the air-evacs isn’t reaching G-1.”

“What do you mean? Only the plaster from Viet Nam goes to biological waste disposal.”

“I spot checked a few ortho air-evac returnees and some did come from Nam whose casts didn’t make it to G-1.” Kaplan gave her the name of a patient from two months ago.

She opened a file drawer on her desk. “I keep meticulous records. What’s the patient’s name again?”

“Marine Lance Corporal Ross Sliden. He arrived on a February thirteenth air evac. His medical record indicates his cast was applied in Vietnam.” Kaplan watched the intensity of purpose on her face and he had a flashback to her bedroom when she was mellow with affection and passion.
Why am I thinking like this?

“Ross Sliden. Ross Sliden. I have him on the admissions list for February 13, 1973.” She looked from an admission summary to the air-evac list. Her face paled. “There’s something wrong. His date of plaster application is different on the air-evac triage list than in his medical chart. The triage roster says it was applied in the Philippines not in Vietnam.”

Kaplan stared as her color returned. “That’s unusual. It never happens.”

“Unless someone changes it. But why would someone do that. Those Vietnam casts are full of pseudomonas bugs. And who would be able to do it.”

“Who was the JMOOD that day? He’s the only one who has access to the triage air-evac list.” Kaplan moved closer to her desk.

“LT Paul Norman.” Skagan put her hand to her mouth.

“Dr. Norman? I don’t believe it. He would have no purpose.” Kaplan saw a new look as she took her hand away from her mouth. “What?”

“Dr. Norman didn’t make the change. The G-3 corpsman did.”

Kaplan stood up. “Corpsman Amstel Perkins? How do you know?”

“He told me one day how he accessed the list for triage so Dr. Norman wouldn’t have to do it. It allowed Norman to make rounds on his JMOOD days and saved him time. I was going to check this out with Norman but never got around to it.”

Kaplan went around to the back of her chair. “Phil, we have to make sure about this.”

“But why would anyone do such a thing. Who would want a dirty cast contaminated with a South East Asia deadly organism?”

“Phil, you have to first verify that Perkins was and maybe is still doing this. Can you approach Norman about the triage list responsibility with Perkins?”

“I could go right to Perkins. Perkins was the one who told me he was doing this advance triage.” She reached up and touched one of his hands on her shoulder.

“I think proper protocol would be for you as an officer to talk to Norman. Then as Senior Corpsman in charge of the cast disposal I can approach Perkins.” Kaplan looked down at this petite feisty woman who he had developed feelings for.
If Perkins is part of the cartel Skagan could be vulnerable for cartel action if she messed with him.

“Okay. Ike can you check on how many other changes were made like this.” She moved her chair back and stood up facing him. “I’ve fallen down on my job. How could this happen?”

“Don’t worry. We’ll correct the problem, believe me.” He embraced her and they kissed.