The Heavenly Host (Demons of Astlan Book 2) (37 page)

BOOK: The Heavenly Host (Demons of Astlan Book 2)
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“I’m getting more than a little tired, I have to admit. This flying business is still pretty new to me,” Reggie agreed.

Tom was fine, surprisingly; the prolonged flight was helping him keep his fidgetiness and even his indigestion in check. Sort of like a good workout. He kept thinking that his symptoms of mana overindulgence would subside at some point, but they had not yet. The massage at the spa had helped, as did today’s exercise.

“I’m good. It’s very scenic; I don’t generally venture this far out on my own,” Estrebrius put in happily.

The party had flown to the nearby boom tunnel, and Tizzy had set the coordinates and they had gone through. Tom had assumed a half hour or so of flying, but it ended up being nearly two hours, and then they ended up at another boom tunnel.

“It’s been nearly two hours since the last boom tunnel. I don’t think I’ve had to use two boom tunnels in more than two centuries,” Antefalken complained. “I know the tunnels all have maximum ranges; were you hitting the max on those two tunnels?”

Tizzy shrugged. “Probably. There’s another boom tunnel up ahead, but it’s been turned off for quite some time.”

“Turned off?” Boggy asked. “Why would anyone turn off a boom tunnel?”

“Save power?” Tizzy asked, shrugging.

“Save power?” Antefalken asked. “Who in the Abyss cares about conservation of anything?”

Tizzy just shrugged.

“So that’s the one we would have gone to if it had been on?” Tom asked.

“Nah, that’s the one we are going to try and turn on to get where we are going,” Tizzy answered. Talarius jostled in Tizzy’s hands, obviously perturbed.

“What do you mean
try?
” Boggy asked. “Are you saying that after all this flying and tunneling, we might not get where we want to go because we can’t turn it on?”

Tizzy tilted his head for a moment. “No, I’m pretty sure I can turn this one on.”

“Well that’s a relief,” Talarius said sarcastically.

“It’s the one that we are going to that’s likely to be the problem. Turning on a boom tunnel remotely is kind of tricky. Sometimes they are so drained that they don’t get the activation signal to wake up,” Tizzy said.

“Ah, fargsbottles!” Boggy cursed.

Antefalken looked over to Tizzy as they flew. “What do you mean, wake-up signal? Boom tunnels are always on.”

Tizzy shook his head. “Not if no one uses them. They go to sleep after about a decade or so, to save power.”

“So the one we are heading to now has been off for over a decade?” Rupert asked. “Why didn’t we just do the remote activation thing for it?”

“Range is too far for the remote activation signal. The one we just came through gets used every few months or years, I think. This next one, not very often.”

“At least a decade, I guess,” Tom said.

Tizzy shook his head from side to side. “I can tell once we turn it on, but my guess is over a hundred.”

“So this place really is in the boonies!” Estrebrius exclaimed.

“So I’m guessing these caves don’t get many tourists?” Tom asked.

Tizzy shrugged. “Just me in the last thousand years, I would bet. Not a lot of people would remember them.”

Boggy looked at him closely. “You know you always avoid this question, mate, but exactly how old are you? You were here when I got here.”

Tizzy shrugged. “No longer counting. Too long.”

Estrebrius nodded. “You were the first person I ever met.”

Antefalken was looking around at the others strangely. “You know, you were also there when I showed up. Apparently you’ve been doing the welcome committee thing for some time?”

Rupert was nodding excitedly. “Yeah, Tizzy was the first demon I met after Tom!”

“That seems a bit odd, doesn’t it, Tizzy?” Tom asked, looking back at the octopod.

Tizzy shrugged. “What can I say? “I smell buttah!” Tizzy said in a sort of mock version of his yenta voice. He cleared his throat and looked a bit sheepish. “Sorry, can’t really do that unless I actually smell buttah.”

“So you can smell new arrivals?” Reggie asked.

Tizzy shrugged again.

“Would you stop doing that?” Talarius asked. “It makes me start swaying uncomfortably.”

“Eh, not sorry,” Tizzy said, looking down at the knight. “Yes, it’s a gift or a curse. But it’s useful for meeting people.” Tizzy went silent and then suddenly turned his head a little and stared. “There we go, the next boom tunnel!” He started moving faster in the direction he had looked. “You would think that after all those welcoming committees, I’d be able to get a date, but nooo!”

 

It took them another five minutes or so to get to the boom tunnel. Tizzy quickly moved up to the boom tunnel arch and placed his upper right hand on the plate; he then closed his eyes in concentration. This lasted about twenty seconds and then a single, low
woohhhmmm
vibrated the ground and air around them. About fifteen seconds later, a second woohhhmmm came, and then after about ten more seconds, a third, and then within a few more seconds, the regular throbbing of a boom tunnel could be felt all around them.

Woohhhmmm

woohhhmmm

woohhhmmm

woohhhmmm
… The tunnel vibrated as various undulating shades of red filled the previously empty archway.

“Tiernon, but these things set my teeth on edge!” Talarius muttered.

Boggy sidled up to the knight. “Well, that’s no wonder. It’s like your entire suit is vibrating and rattling with the throbs. That’s why you shouldn’t wear clothes.”

“I don’t know,” Reggie said. “I can feel it throughout my whole body, and I think it’s a big turn-on.”

Tom glanced down at him without thinking. Yes, Reggie was apparently enjoying the “good vibrations.”
Sheesh.
Tom shook his head.

Tizzy was still concentrating at the archway’s panel. Suddenly the undulating red light was replaced by undulating black light and the throbbing suddenly became much more intense and audibly quite loud. Within about thirty seconds, all were covering their ears as the throbbing was getting almost painful. Talarius’s armor was very clearly rattling now, as were Estrebrius’s teeth in his grinning mouth. He did seem to be enjoying this outing.

Suddenly there was a huge throb, the ground shook beneath their feet, and with that, the boom tunnel’s blackness turned back to red and the throbbing slowly began to subside to normal.

Tizzy let out a loud sigh, as if quite tired, and then removed his hand from the plate. “Voilà!” he exclaimed, pronouncing it with a hard V sound. “Voilà, what a toila! Yada yada yada… I did it!” He was grinning from ear to ear, quite proud of himself. “You will note that I, a humble fiend, can do something that most greater demons can’t do, and a few of the archdemons don’t even know how to do!”

“How is that? I would think the archdemons would know something like this,” Tom said.

Tizzy shrugged. “Most aren’t old enough to have been around when the boom tunnels were built and so never learned.  To be honest, it doesn’t need to be done that often, so most likely they were never taught and the method was forgot.” Tizzy waved his hands around. “You’d be surprised how common Antefalken’s assumption is that boom tunnels are always on.”

“How long ago were the boom tunnels built?” Rupert asked.

Tizzy rolled his head. “Sheesh, that’s a good one. It was a really, really long time ago. The princes hired sleestak wizards to come in and install them all around the Abyss.”

“Sleestak wizards?” Tom asked, puzzled. Antefalken and the others were looking equally puzzled.

“Yeah, you know: wizards who are sleestaks.” Tizzy shrugged.

“By
sleestak
do you mean a sort of human-shaped insect-lizard race with big black eyes?” Tom asked, thinking about certain really old children’s programs and a horrible movie.

“You’ve met some!” Tizzy said, surprised. “That’s impressive. They are really hard to get a hold of, always jumping around time and space and such. You almost need a police box to catch them. DeLoreans aren’t fast enough.” Tizzy was shaking his head. “I don’t think I’ve seen one in”—he paused and suddenly stared around at the others—“a really long time.”

Tom raised an eyebrow. Did Tizzy not want to reveal his age? How old was the octopod? Could it be that maybe Tizzy was not so much crazy as simply senile?

“Anyway, let’s head on through!” Tizzy said and immediately turned and marched into the boom tunnel. Estrebrius shrugged, smiled and flew in after him.

“Talarius?” Tom offered. The knight walked through, followed by Boggy, Reggie and Rupert. Tom brought up the rear.

~

Randolf was hunched over his large notebook, working on formula translations between Lenamare’s demon banishment wards and his own project. Randolf really hated to admit it, but Lenamare was damn good. Amazingly good. Randolf was no slouch; some of the greatest djinn masters had trained him, but this was absolute mastery. He supposed it should not be a surprise.

When Lenamare was a youth, he and Exador’s current incarnations, or whatever they were, had appeared to be about the same age. Lenamare had continually matched Exador toe-to-toe, and Exador was a wizard with thousands of years of experience. Okay, not all as a wizard; sometimes he had been simply a general, possibly a priest even. Then there was time he had spent with the Anilords. But nonetheless, the fact that Lenamare, a mere human like Randolf himself, could have shown such mastery at such a young age was rather humbling.

If only times had been different, and Lenamare had not been such a total cortwad. The two of them might have been allies and sent Exador to his doom years ago. Randolf sighed. The what ifs—they were the seeds of useless ruminations. He shook his head and tried to get back to work.

Donngg
went a warning bell. Randolf looked up from his work; someone was in the outer entryway. A chime sounded even as Randolf started to get up. He sat back down; the chimes indicated that Crispin had returned. Their under-palace lab was very tightly guarded and only certain very specific codes tied to specific auras could get in.

As always, he chuckled at the fact that he, the Archimage of Turelane, could not actually have his own sacred inner sanctum and laboratory in Turelane. He had a minor one of course, befitting the buffoon he played. Unfortunately, the Mage of Turelane, Exador, would have immediately spotted any truly guarded sanctum, any place protected from the prying eyes and ears of an archdemon.

Thus he was forced to create his true sanctum in the warrens of the Council Palace. In the warrens, it was just one highly guarded laboratory among many dozens. Every council member, every committee member, every major lackey had a highly secured layer, knowing who owned what without physical exploration and a great deal of effort, thus setting off a great number of wards among a great number of wizards. This made Randolf just one more needle in a haystack.

Crispin entered through the mantrap, shutting the final door behind him. “Hey ho!” The djinn exclaimed in greeting as he walked over to Randolf. Randolf stood and gave Crispin a hug and quick peck on the lips.

“So was the ball as big a hit in Djinnistan as it was here?” Randolf asked.

“Every bit as much!” Crispin said, chuckling. “A couple of elders nearly choked to death when the greater demon got busy with the Armageddon-summoning routine, as I am becoming fond of calling it.”

“And have they come to any conclusions?” Randolf asked.

Crispin grabbed an apple out of a nearby bowl and bit into it, slowly savoring its juiciness. “I love the material world…” he murmured. Suddenly he looked back at Randolf, who was waiting for an answer. “What do you think? They’re going to be debating this for the next hundred years!” Crispin shook his head. “How long did it take them to come to any consensus about Exador?”

“I wouldn’t know—some of us hadn’t been born then,” Randolf said drily.

“Oh, sorry. I forgot.” Crispin grinned. “I was but a boy myself, or more of a boy than I am now.”

Randolf rolled his eyes. “Yes, yes. You are but a teenager in djinn terms at the ripe young age of what… 183?”

“I’ll be 184 next week; I hope you won’t forget my birthday present?” Crispin asked, twisting his head coyly.

“Hmm. Therefore, you were about fifty when Abancia fell. Barely out of diapers,” Randolf noted.

“You are missing the point—my present?” Crispin asked with a grin.

“I thought you genies were supposed to be the one handing out presents?” Randolf asked with a smirk.

“Oh, you’ll be getting a present alright, if I don’t get one!” Crispin laughed.

Randolf laughed as well. “I have something very nice picked out for you. Rest assured.” Crispin smiled brightly. “Although I’ll have to alert the palace fire marshal before we try to light your cake!”

~

“Holy marathon, batmen! I’m getting a stitch!” Reggie complained while trying to reach around with his right hand and rub his back between his two left arms. They had just landed at the entrance to a large cave at the bottom of a rather deep canyon.

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