The Heavenward Path (11 page)

    "He
what
?" Goranu leaped to his feet.

    "Lord Chomigoto has demanded that I not only repair his shrine but must make it the greatest the world has ever seen. And that I have the treasures of his tomb restored. And that I gather the descendants of his followers so that he may be venerated once more. He says I must do this because I am descended from the Nakatomi clan, who helped the Yamato overthrow his clan centuries ago."

    "That stinking, arrogant, overbearing shade! How dare he! If there is anything a tengu cannot stand it's an arrogant priest, even if he was a king!"

    "Then," I said, hope rising once more, "you will help me rebuild the shrine?"

    "No. Never. That would only puff him up and make him even more overbearing."

    I buried my face in my hands. "Then what am I to do? You were my last hope, Goranu."

    He came over and sat down beside me. "So, so. Stop that now. We will not let Old Blowhard do anything to you. But first you must stop thinking like a silly human, being in awe of anyone with noble title or riches. You must start thinking like a tengu. You agree that his demands on you are unjust, don't you?"

    "Well, yes."

    "Then you must not obey him. But do so in a way that shows Old Blowhard just how foolish he really is.
That
will be justice."

    "I do not know how to conceive of such a plan," I said.

    "But we tengu excel in such thinking. That is why you must think like us in order to succeed in this."

    "But what if Lord Chomigoto realizes he is being tricked and sends Lord Emma-O's demons after me?"

    "What if he does?" asked Goranu with a shrug.

    "But then I am as lost as I am now, or worse! Why do you not understand this, Goranu?"

    Goranu sighed, jumped to his feet, and began to pace the pavilion. "It must be the way you noble girls are raised. Surrounded by walls all the time. So an obstacle rises before you, and all you see is a wall!" He gestured gracefully, and a wood-and-paper wall appeared between us. "To a well-bred noble girl," Goranu continued from the other side, "a wall such as this is impassable. But to creatures like me"-he punched with his fists again and again until the wall was only splintered wood and shredded paper-"there is always a way through." Smiling, he stepped through the hole he had made and bowed to me.

    "I should prefer a not so violent solution," I said.

    Goranu rolled his eyes. "This was just an example, you silly human! I could have used the ocean and swimming, or a mountain range and flying. My point is that if you respect your obstacle too much, if you give it too much power, here in your mind, you will never overcome it. But if you can see a thing as it really is, learn its nature, then there are always solutions. There is always a way around trouble. Remember that."

    It was frightening to realize that there were aspects of the world I could not see because I was not prepared to see them. "But does it matter, if, as we are taught, all the world is illusion?"

    Goranu came back and crouched down beside me. "We tengu have learned that for you mortals, much of the illusion is happening up here." He placed his fingertips lightly on my forehead.

    "Then how can I see through such illusion?" I asked, wishing, strangely, that he could leave his hand there forever.

    Goranu straightened up and looked down at me. "I see I must train you in Tengu-Do, the Way of the Tengu. We tengu are good at teaching warriors, though I must train you in thinking rather than in swordsmanship. You must learn how to fight with your mind. That is the only way you will defeat Old Blowhard and take control of your life again."

    

    

    
A face stares back from the rain puddle. Who is it? The eyes are shadowed…

    

    When Goranu and I returned to the tengu village, we found Suzume and Kuroihane seated on a log bench, as far from each other as possible. But they kept stealing sidelong glances at one another. Though I could not be certain, I had the feeling that they had been flirting.

    "Suzume-san," Goranu said.

    She looked up quickly, startled, as if distracted from a thought. "Hai?"

    "Since you are here and we must do something with you, you will come and learn Tengu-Do with your Great Lady Mitsuko."

    Kuroihane's eyes widened. "Please, Highness, reconsider. This mortal thinks too much like a tengu already."

    "Then she may serve as an example to her lady. Come along."

    I did not like the idea of Suzume being an example to me in any way, although I had to admit she had been right about some things. "Where are we going?" I asked.

    "Another land of illusion, Mitsu-chan, though far different from, and less romantic than, the last." Taking me by one hand and Suzume by the other, Goranu led us to…

    I am not permitted to say, exactly, for the tengu like to keep their secrets. But I will describe some things.

    There is a grotto, I cannot tell you where, in which the tengu find it easier to do their illusions. It is a large, deep cave, full of glistening rocks and crystal that reflected our torchlight in confusing ways. Even our shadows could not stand still.

    Goranu jumped to the top of a large boulder and sat himself upon it, as if he were an incongruous long-nosed, black-robed Buddha. "Now listen well, children, as I reveal to you some of the Way of the Tengu. This must be the short lesson, though, as it usually takes years to teach a mortal what we know.

    "There are two rules that Lady Mitsuko must take to heart if she is to overcome her problems. First, take nothing seriously. Second, all things are changeable. Third, there is more and less to everything you see."

    Suzume pointed an accusing finger at him. "You said there are two rules, yet you have mentioned three."

    "Did I not say all things are changeable? And you should take nothing seriously, not even me. I am just a silly tengu, after all."

    I paced back and forth, feeling impatient. "What do these rules have to do with my discharging my debt to Lord Chomigoto?"

    Goranu rolled his eyes and shook his head. "You are looking to the way of the warrior, for a sword to cut through your problems. I am offering the way of the magician, to transform your situation so that there is no problem. Just as the swordsman needs to train his arm, the sorcerer must train his mind. Stop pacing like that-you are like a monkey in a cage, and that is more true than you know."

    I sat rather ungracefully beside Suzume, in front of Goranu. "What are you talking about? What is true about me and caged monkeys?"

    "The world you nobles have created for yourselves-Above the Clouds, as you put it-that is your cage. It is a very pretty cage, to be sure, but it binds you as tightly as ropes. Now I will tell you something that mortals, particularly noble ones, find terrifying. This cage is an illusion. Who you are, what you are, are illusions, and therefore changeable."

    I frowned at him. "That is nonsense. I know very well who I am. I am the fourth daughter of my father's branch of the Fujiwara clan."

    Goranu shrugged. "An accident of birth. You could have been born a rice cake girl like your servant here, or a farmer, or a bandit. Who would you have been then? What if you had never had nice clothes to wear, never learned to read and write? Wouldn't you be different?"

    I blinked. "That makes no sense. I am not those things. I am Fujiwara."

    "But should the fortunes of the Fujiwara fall, being a Fujiwara would not mean the same thing at all. You see? All is changeable. It need not be the way it is."

    I shook my head. "I do not understand. Not everything is changeable. A person is man or woman, child or adult, noble- born or lowly."

    "Oh, some things may be with you from birth: whether you are strong or sickly, shy or bold, quick or slow, cheerful or sullen. But much more is changeable than you know, if one has the will and the way."

    Goranu was right; this philosophy was very disturbing if true.

    Stubbornly, I said, "From what you say, I should be able to change shape just like you, and I cannot."

    Goranu hopped off his rock. "Unlike us tengu, mortals must do their changing in their minds. Sometimes this is reflected in outward appearance, sometimes not. Surely you have seen a Noh play in which actors portray people they are not. Men pretend to be women, and adults pretend to be children."

    "I understand!" said Suzume, jumping up. "It is like being a child and pretending things. My brother and I would play at being great warriors or pirates or the Emperor and Empress. Didn't you ever do that, Great Lady?"

    I stared at her, shocked. "I would never pretend to be the Empress! Nor would I want to be a pirate or other lowly person."

    She, in turn, seemed astonished at me. "You never pretended
anything
?"

    "Well, perhaps when I was very, very young. I remember pretending to be a butterfly. But that was childish foolishness."

    Goranu shook his head. "Don't you remember when you pretended to be a bosatsu to trick the monks of Mount Hiei into properly burying your brother-in-law?"

    "That was your idea, and Dento's," I grumped. "I would never have thought of such a thing."

    "But you were a very willing participant. I would even dare say you enjoyed it. I thought it was very charming of you."

    I confess I blushed and hid my face in my sleeves. "I only did it to help Yugiri."

    "Hah. You showed great wisdom then. But now you pretend you have forgotten."

    Crossing my arms within my sleeves, I complained, "But I cannot play pretend on my own. I am not a child, and I am not an actor."

    "All mortals are actors," said Goranu, "whether they know it or not." He flung his arms wide. "All life is a big Noh play. Hmm. I like that. I must remember that phrase."

    "Goranu-"

    "Very well, very well. The nub of the matter is this: Sometimes it is useful to be what people expect you to be, but often it can be useful to be someone else-that is, to take on someone else's qualities. Just as I am trying to help you do now. I cannot give you black feathers and wings and a beak. But you might find thinking like a tengu useful. To solve a problem, sometimes you must ignore what you see and what you know and instead choose what will lead to what you want."

    I gave him a blank stare. "You are confusing me."

    "Argh!" He put his hands to his head in frustration. "Very well. It is time for an example." He did some very complicated gesture, and the three of us were standing on a seashore. I could even smell the salty water and hear the cries of gulls.

    Goranu had changed to old-man form, with the shaved head and gray robes of a monk. "Now, you are a fisherman, and I have come from the local temple to beg your catch as a donation. But you need your fish to feed your family. How do you deny me?"

    "What?" I said, distracted by the illusion. "But I am not a fisherman."

    "I understand! Let me try!" cried Suzume.

    "Very well." Goranu turned to her, and his manner changed. He bowed and smiled, his old eyes crinkling. "Good mister fisherman, your family has always been generous to us. Surely, your goodness will bring you great karma. How many baskets full of fish will you be sending to the temple?"

    A mischievous expression crossed Suzume's face, and she bowed back to him. "Oh, Good Holy Sir, I am so glad you have come. We have caught very few fish these past days, and I am wondering if our nets are cursed. Won't you say a blessing or two over them while you are here? Surely, I could not insult your temple by sending our poor catch to you."

    "Ai, Kuroihane was right. You do already think like us," Goranu muttered under his breath. Then, aloud, he said, "Good fisherman, I am so sorry to hear of your poor catch, and naturally I will bless your nets. But we are very low on food at the temple, and I assure you what few fish you can send us will be greatly appreciated."

    Suzume paused, chin in hand, for a moment. Then she said, "Ah!" and bowed again. "Good Holy Sir, I am so glad that we may give these fish to you, for I fear they may be cursed as well. Already two people who have eaten them have fallen sick. But surely the fish will not harm such holy folk as you, and, of course, you have a healer or two at the temple who can handle such matters. Please, take our stinking, unwholesome fish, for who can make better use of them than you?"

    "Er, thank you all the same," said Goranu, backing away, "but I would not think to take from you what few fish you have caught. Perhaps some other time."

    "Aha!" cried Suzume. "I won!"

    "Yes," said Goranu. "But you should not say so while the monk can still hear you. That was excellent, Suzume. You are taking to this very well."

    I was annoyed that Suzume seemed to be doing better than I and winning Goranu's approval. "But you are just teaching her to lie!"

    "Well, what would you have done?" demanded Suzume.

    "I would have given up the fish," I said. "Monks are holy men, and to deny what they ask for brings bad fortune."

    "And your family would have starved," said Goranu, "while the monks can always find donations elsewhere. Clearly you are a long way from thinking like a tengu."

    "You mean acting any way I please? That is so" -I searched for a word -"undignified."

    "Dignity can be useful," said Goranu. "But so can the lack of it. The wisdom is to know when to be what. We have a saying: Chamberlains look very grand in their robes" -Goranu changed into a bureaucrat, wearing the tall black silk hat, voluminous black robes, and trousers whose legs were so long that they trailed behind him -"but they cannot run very fast." Goranu tried to trot across the grotto floor but swiftly tripped and fell.