the huntress 04 - eternal magic (18 page)

“Anytime. Feeding you is part of the gig.”

“What gig?”

“Being your better half.”

I grinned and would have punched him if I hadn’t been preoccupied by the cookie. “So, that’s it, then? We’re a thing? Like, officially?” 

We’d never actually said the words, and though I knew it was probably true because we’d had some pretty intense moments, I wanted to hear him say it. Maybe because everything else in my life was so uncertain, or maybe because I just wanted to hear it.

“Hope that’s not news to you.”

I shook my head. “Nah. Just wanted you to say it first.”

“Happy to be of service.”

“So, like, do I call you my boyfriend?” Seemed so juvenile for a guy like him.

He shrugged. “Sure, why not?”

I should have expected that Aidan was comfortable enough in his masculinity not to give a damn what I called him.

“Right, okay.” I grinned. “I can do that.”

I polished off the cookie and climbed into bed next to him, propping myself against the luxurious padded headboard. Aidan’s lifestyle was one I could get used to.

“By the way, I got a message from my assistant,” Aidan said. “The Order of the Magica has sent their thanks for your help with defeating the portal, but they’re no longer planning to meet with you to thank you.”

“Really?” Hope flared in my chest. Finally, something was going right.

“Yes. After you pulled the fire alarm at the Nullifier’s memorial, it took them a while to get everything sorted and everyone back in place. They held the memorial, but when we weren’t there afterward to meet with them, they assumed we’d left because of the alarm. They don’t want to reschedule, so they sent flowers instead.”

“Flowers? That’s weird. Do you think Victor Orriodor had anything to do with it?”

“Possibly. But flowers the usual cheap and easy thank you for a job well done, so it could just be normal.”

I laughed. “I’m being paranoid. And I guess they only kind of appreciated my efforts. But I’ll take it as long as Orriodor had nothing to do with it. It’s way better than having to meet them.”

Aidan grinned as he climbed off the bed. “I thought you’d like to hear that. I’m going to take a shower.” But he didn’t walk into the bedroom. Instead, he went to the dresser and removed something from the duffle bag he’d set on top when we’d arrived.

“No shower?” I asked.

“I will, but I thought maybe you’d want this before I went.” He handed me a picture frame.

I looked down at it. My parents smiled out from the photo. He must have taken it from the house. My throat tightened, but I managed to blink back tears long enough to look at him and say, “Thanks.”

He nodded and leaned down to kiss me, then went to the shower.

I listened to the water run as I looked at the photo of my parents. My only two memories of my parents filled my head. And they weren’t even real memories. My mother had been an apparition, and I’d witnessed my father and my younger self. I hadn’t actually remembered living any moments with them.

My eyes smarted and I blinked rapidly.

“Hey, you okay?” Aidan’s voice pulled me from my thoughts.

He was out of the shower already? How long had I been here moping? I scrubbed a hand over my eyes. “Yeah, yeah. I’m fine.”

He wore only a pair of tight black boxer briefs and his hair was still wet. My gaze traveled over the cut muscles and the ridges and valleys that were hard to look away from, no matter how bummed I was.

“You don’t look fine,” he said.

“I’m not handling this well. My parents, the nullifying power. I’m off my game.”

“Yeah, of course. You’re dealing with some heavy stuff.”

“Sure, but I’m not usually such an emotional wimp. There’s a lot riding on this, and I’m being so lame about it. My parents were so tough. Nix and Del are so tough. And I’ve spent more time crying in the last week than I have in my whole freaking life.”

“You don’t have to be stone, Cass.” Aidan sat next to me on the bed and pulled me against his side. “You are only human.”

“No, I’m Magica. A strong freaking Magica who is also a giant freaking wimp.”

He huffed a short laugh. “It’s an expression.”

“I know.”

“You are tough. And strong. So what if you’ve been crying lately? Some people just have faces that leak. I once knew a guy who’d cry when he got mad. Angry as fuck, wailing punches, and the stress would make his eyes leak.”

I laughed. “You did not.”

“I did. On my honor. Crying doesn’t make you weak. Lying down and not fighting makes you weak. Who cares if your eyes become fountains when you think about your dead parents or your lost magic?”

“When you put it like that, I guess it doesn’t sound so bad.” Especially the dead parents part. That part freaking sucked. Who wouldn’t cry about that? “But my power. I’ve been shit about that. I’ve practiced my nullifying power, but I’ve gotten nowhere.”

“You’re fighting it,” Aidan said.

“Course I’m fighting it. It sucks. I wanted to shed it like a snake skin.”

“You can’t fight it away. Forcing it won’t work. But you don’t have to be powerless. The Nullifier’s talent is powerful. It knocked me out of the sky.”

I nodded, remembering the time in Switzerland when the Nullifier had turned up the juice on his power and forced Aidan—the freaking Origin, for magic’s sake—to lose his magic and turn from a griffin back into a human. In midair. Two thousand feet above a valley in the Swiss Alps. 

“You need to embrace your new power, even if only temporarily,” Aidan said. “It’s a powerful gift, and you may need it.”

“But it’s fighting inside me.”

“Maybe. Aethelred said it’s because your innate magic conflicts with it. But also because you won’t let it settle.” He pointed to the cold cuff still around my wrist. “You’re even wearing a dampening charm. That can’t help.”

“It doesn’t really work.” But I’d been unable to take it off because I’d hoped it would start working. I knew it was ridiculous, but I couldn’t help it. And sometimes
I
was ridiculous. 

“I know you want your magic back, and we’ll get it. But until you have it, you need to learn to use what you’ve got. Embrace the change and learn to work with it.”

“You’re totally right.” I hated hearing it, but he
was
right. “How’d you get to be so smart?”

“Just lucky, I guess.”

“So how do I embrace it?”

“Take the cuff off, for one.”

I slipped the cuff off, not liking the feeling of removing it. 

“You’re a fighter, Cass. If you see something you want, you fight your way toward it and force it to work.”

“Yeah, and I’ve been pretty successful.”

“You have. But times have changed. For most of your life, you refused your power. You’re a Magica. You should have been using your power. Instead, you forced yourself and the world to accommodate your will to live without magic.”

“I had to. It’s the only way I could hide. I’m not going to stop being a fighter.” That was who I was. “I can’t.”

“I don’t think you should. It’s one of the things I like about you. But some battles don’t help us. You need to stop fighting the Nullifier’s magic and start fighting for it. At least until you can get rid of it for good. Using it is the smartest thing.”

I nodded, my mind spinning with everything that he’d said. “Give me a sec. I want to try.”

He squeezed my shoulder encouragingly as I closed my eyes and focused on the magic—or lack of magic—within me. The familiar emptiness greeted me. My chest felt hollowed out, like someone had gotten in there with an ice-cream scoop and gone to town.

This was normally where I retreated. It was the worst feeling, and I didn’t want to revel in it.

But if I wanted to succeed, I had to. I’d faced plenty of miserable shit in my life. What was a little more?

The empty feeling in my chest grew as I tried to pull on the Nullifier’s magic. To manipulate it to my will and push it outward. Sending it outward meant letting it expand within me.

I broke out in a cold sweat as I tried to embrace the Nullifier’s magic and let it fill my whole body.

“Make a flame,” I bit out.

I peeked my eyes open to see Aidan hold his hand out and produce a small flame. It flickered orange in the dim room. 

I was gonna squash that little sucker.

My breathing grew shallow as I let the Nullifier’s magic flow through me. When it filled me down to my fingers and toes—a feeling I wouldn’t be remembering with fondness—I tried to grab hold of it.

My normal magic felt robust and distinct. Lightning crackled and sizzled beneath my skin until I released it. Ice felt cold and brittle. The nullification magic felt like I’d grabbed ahold of a ghost.

But I held on to that ghost, pushing it out of myself and toward Aidan.

The flame in his hand flickered and blew, as if a wind had kicked up in the bedroom, but it didn’t die. I sucked in a deep breath and pushed harder on the Nullifier’s magic. It swelled in the air, prickling against my skin as it left me and flowed outward. 

I felt Aidan wince against my side, then the flame in his palm died out.

“Good job.” Aidan’s voice was rougher than normal. Pained.

Suddenly I felt like shit. “I’m so sorry! I wanted to practice, but I forgot how bad it would feel for you.”

I’d hated it when the Nullifier’s magic had influenced me in the past. It felt a hell of a lot like what I was feeling now. I might loathe this misery, but I wouldn’t wish it on anyone else. Especially not someone I cared for.

Aidan pressed a kiss to my forehead. “Don’t worry about it. I wanted to help.”

“You did. That’s the first time I really felt how the magic worked. I’ve used it in the past, but it hasn’t been so deliberate. This time, I controlled it.”

“And you will in the future,” Aidan said. “Until the day you get rid of it for good.”

“I hope so.” Worry gnawed at my chest. “But it was so difficult. And that was just a tiny bit of magic that I nullified. I don’t know if I could do much more than that.”

“You’ll find a way.”

I looked up and met his gray gaze. “Thanks for the support. Means a lot.”

The corner of his mouth hitched up in a devastating smile. “Anytime.”

He was so handsome it made my brain short circuit. I wasn’t the type to lose it over looks—there were so many more important things. Kindness, honor, humor, intelligence. That weird, unexplainable quality that made two people fit together like the only matching puzzle pieces in the world.

The thing was—Aidan had
all
those qualities.

And he was so handsome that my brain didn’t quite know how to process it. Not to mention the fact that he was currently shirtless.

I climbed on top of him, straddling his waist, and rested my hands on his heavy shoulders as his big hands came up to grip my hips. His pecs were broad wide, flat slabs of muscle that gave way to the ridges of his abdomen. 

I allowed myself one quick look before meeting his gaze. “Now I just have to think of a way to repay you.”

“You don’t need to repay me.” Despite his words, his heated gaze dipped down, running over my body. I was wearing a tent of a shirt, but Aidan seemed to like the hints he got.

Heat flowed through my limbs, gathering in the most interesting places.

“Oh, but I want to.” I pressed a kiss to his throat, darting my tongue out to taste his clean skin. The soap-clean Aidan smell of him made my toes curl.

His head fell back against the headboard and he groaned, a low rumble in his throat that sent shivers over my skin. I tightened my thighs around his hips, liking the feel of him beneath me. 

I ran my mouth lower, delighting in the smooth skin against my lips. My tongue darted out to taste him and he jerked, his fists tightening against my hips. His strength sent a frisson of excitement through me.

I dragged my tongue lower, toward his abs and the much more enticing destination concealed by the black cotton stretched tightly over his hips.

I glanced up to see his muscles clenched tight and the veins standing out at his throat. 

He liked this. A lot.

I darted my tongue out, licking his smooth skin. He groaned and gripped the headboard, his arms straining as he nearly crushed the wood.

“Jesus, Cass.” His voice was rough with desire. “Be careful, or I might start thinking you want me.”

“What if I do want you? What if I want everything?” And I did. I wanted him so badly my body felt like it was on fire. If he wanted me back had protection, I’d be all over him. 

His dark eyes snapped to mine, fire in their depths. “Then I’m inclined to give it to you.”

I grinned, then reached a hand to the waistband of his boxers and lowered my mouth to his abs.

“Any special requests?” I murmured against his skin.

“Just you.” He reached down and pulled me up, pressing a kiss to my lips. When he pulled away and his and his gaze met mine, I knew I was probably in for the best night of my life. 

CHAPTER ELEVEN

I’d been right. It had been the best night of my life. Which was why I hadn’t gotten nearly enough sleep last night and this hike across a totally flat field felt like I was going uphill.