The Intrigues of Haruhi Suzumiya (16 page)

Haruhi continued to mutter, but it was drowned out by Mr. Okabe’s raised voice and the general din of the rest of my classmates.

So here’s a reliable technique for burning the contents of a class into your brain cells. You don’t actually need any special concentration ability. Just vaguely listen to whatever the teacher’s saying and stare at either the chalkboard or the textbook. Of course it’s better to take notes, but it’s hard to be motivated to take perfect notes every period, which is why you need the technique.

To put it simply, it comes down to this: you don’t have to concentrate on class. But you can’t think about anything
besides
class. After all, if you’re thinking about nothing, you get bored, and your idle brain will just remember whatever’s coming in from the ears and eyes.

Just give it a try. But please keep in mind that I got this technique from Haruhi—you could say it’s the Haruhi-style Study Technique. You don’t have to study, but you can’t think about
anything
besides study. But there’s no joy in that kind of life, and I found the idea of Haruhi not thinking about anything difficult to believe, so basically this had to be a crock, although there was nothing I could say to the fact that Haruhi’s grades were excellent.

All that said, it was a tall order for me at the moment. While Haruhi’s vague melancholy had bothered me quite a bit recently, her magic points seemed to have been completely restored by a single sheet of ancient paper—a turn of events I welcomed. It was one less thing for me to worry about.

In exchange, I now had three more letters’ worth of orders from Asahina the Elder. With the help of Asahina from eight days hence, I’d have to put them into action somehow. Even if I’d wanted to do so immediately, they were time-dependent, so I couldn’t just dash out of the classroom immediately and get to work—but neither could I afford to be lazy…

With all these thoughts in my head, it was no wonder I couldn’t absorb any of the class material, but at least I had a unique excuse.

After school, Haruhi herded me off to the clubroom; I felt like a tiny fish being cornered by a cormorant. Thanks to Tsuruya’s improvisation, I couldn’t use Shamisen’s health as an excuse to go home early, and on top of that, I genuinely had no other plans today.

That’s right, the letters I’d retrieved from my shoe locker made it clear that today and the next day were free. My duties would fall on the day after tomorrow, and the day after that. The reason three messages had all arrived together today was simple: after today, I wouldn’t be back at school for a while. Thanks to the
holiday and the entrance exams for middle schoolers, it was a four-day weekend.

Time travelers sure did like using shoe lockers as post office boxes. I wouldn’t have minded a bit if she’d just delivered the messages to me in person. I had more than a few things I wanted to ask Asahina the Elder.

Such were the thoughts that occurred to me during class, and even now, being dragged along by Haruhi. Finally, we arrived at the literature club’s room.

“Hey! Sorry for the wait!”

I entered the room, pulled after Haruhi as she gave a cheerful yell and opened the door energetically. A strange nostalgia welled up within me, probably because it had been three whole days since I’d last hung out with the entire membership of the brigade. Apparently my attachment to the group was such that I’d have this sort of feeling after only three days.

Still feeling a bit dazed, I closed behind us the door Haruhi’d thrown open, then gave the brigade members inside another look.

My gaze first landed upon a girl sitting in the corner, school-uniformed, hair short-cropped, thick book open in front of her. Nagato regarded both Haruhi and me with her tirelessly blank expression, but soon returned her attention to the text before her. The small-framed organic android wasted neither words nor actions, her stoic, tranquil manner constant as she occupied her corner.

“Hello, there. It’s been a while.” Koizumi smiled meaningfully, the scattered pieces of a jigsaw puzzle before him. “How’s Shamisen the First doing? If necessary, I can recommend an excellent animal hospital. I have a friend whose relative operates it, and I’m told it’s very good.”

Yeah, I’ll bet. All of his connections seemed to be “excellent,” I muttered.

“I’m surprisingly well-connected, actually. In many ways,” said
Koizumi, snapping a jigsaw puzzle piece into place. “If I follow those connections, I can find nearly anyone. As far as people outside my network of connections go…” he continued, spreading his arms elegantly wide, as though performing on stage. “They’d have to be people that don’t yet exist on this earth.”

He already knew aliens and time travelers, so who else could he possibly hope to be acquainted with? I didn’t want to meet any extra-dimensional travelers, that was for sure. It’d be nothing but trouble.

Koizumi chuckled and cut off his conversation with me, turning to Haruhi. “I believe you said something about holding a meeting today?”

“That’s right! A special emergency meeting.” Haruhi tossed her bag onto the brigade chief desk, then plopped down in her chair. “Mikuru! Tea, please.”

“Okay!” It was indubitably Mikuru in her maid outfit who answered adorably, then hurried over to the kettle.

Of course it was. There wasn’t any problem with Mikuru being here. Still…

“Mmm…” I murmured quietly, my mouth closed. I needed to put my thoughts in order. This wasn’t Michiru Asahina, who even now haunted Tsuruya’s house. This was the Asahina who hadn’t yet traveled a few days back in time.

As she poured hot water from the small, burbling pot, she suddenly looked up to me.

“Um, Kyon…”

She looked worried—exactly like the other Asahina who had appeared three days ago, from what was then eight days in the future. I guess that was obvious. As I was trying to prepare myself to say something, she continued.

“How is the kitty cat doing? Maybe he’s sick because we took him to such a cold place during winter vacation…”

“Uh, n-no…” I stumbled over my words. This Asahina didn’t know anything. She had no idea that five days from now, in the
evening, she would jump back in time to three days before today. Man, this was getting hard to keep track of.

“Shamisen’s been doing better since yesterday. He’s probably rolling around in my room right now.”

Asahina smiled beautifully, which made me feel even guiltier. (Michiru) Asahina already knew that Shamisen’s supposed illness was a total lie, which was why she hadn’t said anything about it, but this Asahina was worried about him and was trying to comfort me—all because of that big fat lie. It made me want to bow my head in apology.

“Please do let me play with him again sometime. He’s such a cute kitty.”

There was nothing cuter than Asahina, though, not within five hundred light-years of this planet, but if she thought a cat was a good excuse to come visit my house, I’d prepare cats aplenty, I told her—although Shamisen was always bringing a black alley cat over; probably his girlfriend.

“Hee hee. That’d be nice. Oh—!” Asahina started. “The tea’s spilled.”

Hot water had boiled out of the teapot. She’d been distracted by her conversation with me about the cat. This seemed to fit Haruhi’s idea of Asahina as the “clumsy maid.” Her arms folded in satisfaction, Haruhi watched Asahina wipe the table.

I pulled out a folding chair and sat down next to Koizumi, while Haruhi took out the current object of her obsession and waited to make her announcement.

“Sorry to keep you waiting.” Asahina brought a tray with two teacups on it, serving Haruhi and me. I figured Haruhi would only be able to wait until we’d had a single sip of tea, but contrary to my expectations, she didn’t seem to have any intention of standing. She sipped her tea, then leaned back in her chair at the brigade chief’s desk, a cocky grin on her face as she turned on the computer and idly flipped through a magazine. Our eyes would meet occasionally, whereupon she’d look serious for a moment,
then go back to grinning—the woman of a hundred faces, indeed. What did this portend?

Koizumi continued to work on his puzzle, pretending not to notice, while Nagato hadn’t reacted at all. Asahina busied herself with the second round of tea, and while things seemed pretty much totally normal, “normal” was totally weird today. What was Haruhi wasting all this time for?

The answer was soon entirely clear.

The room’s peace was broken not by a cry from Haruhi or a PA announcement telling students to go home, but rather a rhythmic knock on the door.

“Heya! Here I am! Can I come in?”

I heard a high, familiar voice as Haruhi bolted to her feet.

“We’ve been waiting! C’mon in, c’mon in!”

In a rare display, the brigade chief opened the door herself to welcome in the guest.

“Hey there, long time no see, everybody-but-Mikuru! Oh, I guess I saw you yesterday, huh, Kyon? Shami’s great, you should bring him by again!”

Tsuruya’s loud voice rang out. She and Haruhi had their arms around each other’s shoulders, and she grinned as though they were about to bust out in a line dance. Here we go again, I thought.

“Yup, that’s right! A treasure map! Treasure’s about three hundred years old. It’d be great if it’s Genroku-era gold coins or something!” Tsuruya sat cross-legged on a folding chair as she munched down on the rice crackers that were served with her tea. “Hadn’t been in the storeroom for like five years—we just keep stuff we don’t need anymore there, see. Found that scrap of paper in the family storeroom, y’know, in a basket buried under a bunch of junk!”

Tsuruya gulped down tea from the nice guest-use-only teacup, then stood up and pointed at the whiteboard.

The map had been stuck to the whiteboard with magnets at its corners, while Haruhi stood beside it and patted Tsuruya’s back with the pointer she held. Haruhi sure seemed happy.

“They’ve tried to get us to turn that mountain over to the state, but my ancestor said in his will that we can’t ever do that. It must be because of the treasure! Is that what you were getting at, Ancestor Guy?” Tsuruya clapped her hands together and made a quick bow toward the sun, as Haruhi smacked the whiteboard with her pointer. “So that’s that.”

So what was what? All we’d heard was Tsuruya talking about her ancestor’s will, I pointed out.

“Obviously we’re going to go search for the treasure her ancestor buried. What would be the point of this story, otherwise?” Haruhi’s mouth was open wide, her white teeth showing. “That settles it—we’re going tomorrow. If we don’t hurry, someone might beat us to it. Assemble at the usual station, nine
AM
. We’re heading to the mountains! And don’t worry; I’ll bring everything we need.”

It went without saying that I was completely unsurprised. I was the one who’d gotten the map from Tsuruya yesterday, and I’d heard we were going on a treasure hunt three days earlier from Asahina, and again this morning from Haruhi. I had no confidence in my ability to fake being surprised now. I brought my mostly empty teacup to my lips and pretended to take a drink, but it turned out there was no need.

Only one person in this room was surprised.

“Eh? Wha—? Treasure hunting? Mountain climbing? Ah—I’d better make some lunches!”

Only Asahina.

Nagato, her book still open, followed the tip of Haruhi’s pointer in silence.

“Well, now. This could indeed be fascinating, from an anthropological
and archaeological perspective. I look forward to it.” Koizumi smiled, ready as ever to support Haruhi’s plans.

If Haruhi’d been hoping for everyone to be stunned by her plan, she’d been sorely mistaken. But she seemed not to take notice of the lack of surprise. “That’s about the size of it. If we find anything, we’ll split it equally—Tsuruya gets a share too, for her support.”

“Sounds good!” said Tsuruya, a little too loudly. “If you find anything worth money, I’ll totally give you guys ninety percent. And if it’s something that great-great-great… actually I forgot how many greats, but anyway, something that Grandpa Fusauemon left to get a laugh out of his grandchildren, I guess my family’ll hang on to it. Either way, I can’t help you out with the digging! I’m busy tomorrow, see.”

Tsuruya gave me a significant look, after which she turned to Asahina and smiled. Tsuruya’s body language made it clear that she was going to keep her promise not to say anything to
this
Asahina.

I didn’t doubt her. And yet.

For someone who’d claimed she didn’t want to be involved more than necessary, she had given me as much explanation as anyone short of Koizumi. In spite of that—no,
given
that—her actions were hard to understand. At least when she helped out with the baseball tournament, or when we’d borrowed her family’s villa, those were requests
we
made of
her
. But this time she’d gone out of her way to throw Haruhi a bone; it was like she was trying to be
more
involved with us, rather than less. Maybe she just liked giving Haruhi things she thought Haruhi would enjoy.

Whatever my suspicions, Tsuruya continued to munch away on the rice crackers, happy as a clam.