The Journal: Cracked Earth (19 page)

* * *

When we returned home I opened the bag from
Don and discovered a dozen large rib-eye steaks. I set two of them
on a plate to thaw for dinner and put the other ten in one of the
coolers on the deck. I sat by the stove. My ankle was really
starting to hurt. I had definitely overdone it today. John saw me
wince when I got up for an ice pack.

“Sit!” he commanded. “What do you need?” I
told him where the ice packs were. He gently pulled my boot off,
set my foot on a pillow that he placed on a chair, and pressed an
ice pack around my throbbing ankle. I sighed.

“Don’t move for at least a half hour. You
need anything, tell me. Okay?”

“Okay. Pull up a chair and talk to me. Tell
me about your family, your home, anything.” All he needed was a
little prompting.

“My daughter Christine is now thirty and
finished school as a dental hygienist about five years ago. She had
a nice job in Fort Wayne, Indiana at a clinic, until it cut back
the staff and she got laid off. It’s a good thing she’s single,
since the only other job she could find after six months was in
Greenwood, near Indianapolis, and she had to move.” He paused to
adjust the icepack on my ankle that had slipped to the side. “My
mom lives in Louisville, Kentucky, so at least Christine is closer
to her grandma now. My mom loves to travel,” John smiled. “She’s
been all over the states, seeing everything the travel brochures
talk about. The Grand Canyon, Mount Rushmore, the Bad Lands. I
think her favorite is Bourbon Street during Mardi Gras. She’s quite
adventuresome for an old lady.” The sound of his laughter filled
the room and made me smile.

I’ve never heard him say this much in the
year I’ve known him. Of course, he was usually face-down on the
massage table.

Forty-five minutes later, the ice pack was
warm and my butt was numb. I needed to move. I stood, took a step,
my ankle gave out and I stumbled. John caught me by the shoulders
and prevented me from falling. We stood there for a moment, then he
pulled me closer, his face hovering mere inches from me. He lowered
his head and kissed me, barely brushing my lips. Then he deepened
the kiss. Shock waves of pleasure assaulted my senses and I leaned
into him, returning his kiss. His lips seared mine with a
passionate heat I had not expected. Desire flooded my body and I
moaned as he brought me tighter against him.

“I’ve wanted to do that for a very long
time,” John whispered.

JOURNAL ENTRY: December 24

I had planned on going into the office
despite the fact that it’s Christmas Eve, however, the roads still
haven’t been plowed. John walked out to CR 695, which was finally
cleared a few minutes after noon. My road is knee deep in snow, so
I still can’t get out. I almost don’t care anymore.

John and I seem to be avoiding each other,
embarrassed by our brief intimacy last night. It was a wonderful,
tender kiss that was filled with unspoken promises. Unfortunately,
it has left a tension in the air.

I asked him to gas up and start the generator
so I could do some laundry. His clothes have been soaking long
enough. I found a camouflage one-piece coverall that Eric left
behind his last trip here for John to wear while I washed
everything he’s been wearing the past few days. He has so few
clothes. I need to find a way to get to the Eagle Beach house so
John can get some of his own things.

As I was hanging the heavier wet clothes on
the drying rack by the stove the plow went by! At least everyone
should be able to get here tomorrow.

* * *

“John, let’s go over some of the things that
I’ve found necessary to adapt to without power,” I said while he
sat attentively. “The generator can run the whole house provided we
use only one 220 line, and that’s the well pump for water. The
clothes dryer takes a great deal of power and puts too much of a
strain on the generator and could possibly damage it, which we
can’t risk.”

“That makes sense.”

“I’m keeping a pot for hot water on the stove
at all times for dishes, washing, and whatever else we might need
it for. If you use the pot, refill it and remember to wipe off the
bottom so it doesn’t leave rings on the stove surface. If I think
of anything else, I’ll mention it.”

“Fair enough,” he said, giving me one of his
shy smiles.

* * *

It was close to 4:00 P.M. when I heard the
engine rumble of a car in the driveway. A surge of panic rose in my
throat and I had a flashback to when Bill Harris showed up. It
wasn’t him, of course. It was Jason. Out of the car came Amanda and
Jacob. When I opened the door, Jacob ran up and flung himself into
my arms. It was so good to see him!

“Jason, Mandy, this is John Tiggs, a friend
I’ve known for a long time. He’s staying with me now,” I added,
making the introductions.

“I’m glad you’re not alone here anymore, Mom.
I’ve worried about you being on your own.” Jason shook John’s hand.
“And I wonder if we could stay tonight too,” he asked.

“Of course you can!” I said, before realizing
the sleeping arrangements would have to be adjusted. “Just put your
stuff in the computer room and make yourself a drink. John, can we
talk for a minute?” When he came over, I said quietly, “I should
have talked to you about this first, but I didn’t know that Jason
would be here today and wanting to spend the night. Ummm…” I
hesitated, “will you sleep in here tonight so they can have that
room?” I gazed into his blue eyes, hoping he’d say yes, afraid he’d
say no.

“Allex,” he said softly, tucking a strand of
hair behind my ear, “once you let me share your bed, it must be
completely and nightly. I won’t go back to the couch once they
leave. Are you okay with that?”

I swallowed, hard, my voice gone and nodded.
He obviously had thought about this for some time. Ready or not,
our relationship instantly changed. When we walked back into the
kitchen, John slid his hand into mine, and we officially became a
couple.

* * *

“I was just getting ready to organize dinner.
Are you hungry?” I looked from Jason to a much thinner Amanda.
Jason had fixed himself what looked like rum and cola, Mandy had a
glass of water and things seemed tense.

“Oh, yeah,” Jason answered sullenly.
“Yesterday, I ran out of that food you brought last week. I still
had some ramen noodles for Jacob for this morning, but that’s why
we came early. I hope you don’t mind.”

“Of course I don’t mind! Don’t be silly.
You’re always welcome here. I was thinking of some chicken on pasta
for dinner, there will be plenty for everyone.” I gave John’s hand
a squeeze and let go, so I could collect items from the back
pantry.

Jason grilled Jacob a cheese sandwich and cut
it up small. Jacob’s eyes lit up when he saw it and ate every last
bite. Oh, my, the little guy was really hungry. My heart hurt for
my grandson.

“How would Jacob like some popcorn?” I looked
at Jason. “And I know there are juice packs still in the
pantry.”

“Oh, I’m sure he would love some,” Jason was
holding his emotions in check, but this bit of normalcy was taxing
him.

“John, would you start the generator again?
It won’t be for long.” He grabbed his jacket and a flashlight.

Once the power came up, Jason put a pack of
popcorn in the microwave. When it was done, he put a second one in.
“For later.” He grinned.

The water I had put on for the pasta was
boiling and I stirred the fettuccini in. “Mandy, would you stir
this, please?” When she was close enough, I asked, “Where have you
been? We’ve been so worried!”

“I don’t want to talk about it,” she said,
and turned her back on me, unwilling to share what had
happened.

The table was aglow with lamp light when we
sat down to eat. By the time we were done, Jacob was already curled
up on the futon, fast asleep. Jason pumped up the air-mattress, and
everyone settled in for the night, exhausted from the busy day.

As I snuggled up next to John, I could hear
Jason and Amanda in the other room, arguing. I fell asleep
troubled.

* * *

I stretched under the covers and bumped into
something. Startled, I froze and then remembered that John was with
me now. I turned slowly to see his blue eyes opened and amused.

“Merry Christmas,” he said and kissed me
lightly. I smiled, and kissed him back, deeper. “Easy, Allex,” he
pulled away, “this is too tempting and I want our first time
together when we’re completely alone.”

Last night we slept. Just slept. I sighed,
but agreed, and slipped out of bed.

We woke to a fresh blanket of snow on the
ground. The house was quiet but not cold like I thought it would
be. Jason had gotten up during the night and put more wood in the
stove.

It was Christmas morning, and I was
disappointed that I didn’t have a tree. There were no colored
lights, but I could give my family love. Right now I think that
mattered more than presents. Then I remembered I did have
presents!

I started a fresh pot of coffee, for which
Amanda was very grateful. It might not have been up to her
Starbucks standard, but it was more than she had had for a couple
of weeks, and she sipped it with pleasure.

Jason noticed I was limping and using a cane
and wanted to know what happened.

“It really was nothing. I forgot to salt down
the steps and slipped when I was hauling in wood.”

“And why were
you
hauling in wood?”
Jason demanded, glancing over at John. John’s mouth tightened in
defense and his chin rose just enough for me to notice.

“Jason, I know you’re being protective, but
this happened days before John got here. And since then, I haven’t
lifted a stick of wood and he helps with all the chores.”

John looked Jason in the eye and said, “Your
mother can be a stubborn woman, can’t she?”

I pouted, which made Jason laugh, since he
knows I have a hard time sitting still for long. With the tension
eased, I reinforced my support for John by slipping my arm through
his. I could
feel
him relax. I sure don’t need Jason and
John being at odds with each other. They are both so important in
my life now.

I passed out what few presents that I had
from my early shopping in the fall. I apologized to John for having
no gift for him, but he silenced me with his finger on my lips.

“You’ve already given me the best gift
possible,” he smiled. “I’m sorry that I don’t have one for
you.”

He moved away to help set the leaf into the
table before I could protest.

* * *

Jason retrieved the ham from the barn while
John relit the stove. I convinced John to let Jason bring in wood
because I needed him to help me in the back. John reluctantly gave
up that one duty, “just for today”.

My thoughts kept slipping into town. I
haven’t been to the office since John arrived a few days ago. I’m
sure things are going fine. If not, there is nothing that I could
do anyway.

It was 2:00 P.M. and the rolls were going
into the oven when Bob and Kathy arrived.

After introductions all around, I brought out
a tray of deviled eggs that I had kept secret from everyone.
Deviled eggs, cheese and crackers, plus some of the venison summer
sausage that Jason and I made last fall were the appetizers I had
selected.

Bob was so happy with the little appetizer
spread that he insisted on opening one of the six bottles of wine
that they had brought.

“How did you keep these crackers so fresh?”
Kathy questioned while she munched a second piece, obviously
enjoying the food.

“As an experiment, I dry canned a few boxes
of different kinds of crackers last summer. I wasn’t sure how they
would turn out, but I’m happy with them. I only have a few jars,
but this is a good occasion to use them,” I told her.

“This is great! Will you marry me?” Bob asked
jokingly after eating several appetizers, his favorite part of the
meal.

John immediately tightened his arm around my
shoulders possessively and retorted, “She’s taken. She’s mine and
you can’t have her!” He grinned.

Bob laughed. “You’ve made a wise choice, my
friend.”

A few minutes later Jacob came into the
kitchen.

“Nahna, can I watch a movie?” he asked,
tugging on my arm and my heart. Jason started to explain that he
couldn’t, but I stopped him.

“This is a special day for all of us. John
will you start the generator? We’ll run it for a few hours. Jacob
can watch anything he wants. We can have lights and running water
and I can use the other stove to help re-heat things for dinner.”
It was Christmas Day, I had my friends and my family here, plus I
had John. We had plenty of food for everyone and I was determined
that we would all have a good time.

I had already decided on using the remaining
ham for dinner, along with the ham, a green and wax bean casserole
with cream of mushroom soup and a baked garden pumpkin filled with
rice pilaf. I’ve done the pumpkin-rice before and it’s not only
good but fun to scoop out some rice and squash at the same time.
Fresh bread rolls, too. For dessert we had baked apples.

With everything heated at the same time,
dinner went smoothly, the wine flowed freely and the conversation
was lively. Kathy told of how quiet Moose Creek was at night,
except for last night.

“We’ve been getting used to it being very
quiet at night,” she said, “so when the music and ruckus started
last night it really surprised me, especially the music!”

Living right in the heart of town, they heard
everything.

“I think Buddy was holding a private party at
The Jack,” Bob chimed in. “He must have found a case of booze
hidden somewhere.”