The Keeper's Flame (A Pandoran Novel, #2) (40 page)

The fire might as well have consumed my heart.

Alex kept his hand laced through mine, never leaving my side. Not even when people approached me to pay their respects to my father. Alex stayed there beside me like an anchor, quiet and constant and strong.

“It is a great loss,” Ehren said, bowing his head. “If there’s any way I can help, please,” his voice was sincere and laden with respect, “I would consider it an honor.”

“Thank you,” I said softly. “For everything.”

He held my gaze a long moment, then nodded and joined the other Arborennians who were walking back to the castle.

A woman stopped before us with long white hair and exotic dark eyes; she was wrapped in a sort of silver cloth that made her look like a winter queen. It was the same woman I’d seen in the courtyard before, only then she’d been exchanging words with Vera.

“Mercedes Bellona of Gesh,” she said in an accent very similar to Vera’s, and she extended a slender hand. “I don’t believe we’ve met—” she tilted her head “—officially.”

I took her hand; her grip was like iron, and I suddenly had the feeling that I should never cross her.

“Daria,” I said.

She let go, studying me with those exotic, yet fierce eyes that were so much like Vera’s. And then she glanced at Alex.

“Alexander.” She said his name with the same enunciation Vera had.

Alex nodded, respectfully. “My lady.”

Right, she was the ruler of Gesh.

Mercedes studied him a moment with a blank expression on her beautiful face, and then turned her eyes to me. “I am sorry for the loss of your father.” She didn’t sound very sorry, but I thought it was probably about as “sorry” as she was capable of sounding. “He was a remarkable man, your father, and Gaia will feel the tragedy of his loss for many years, I’m afraid.”

Alex squeezed my hand gently.

“It is never easy, losing one’s parents,” she said almost as an afterthought, and glanced to the side.

I followed her gaze to where Vera was crossing the beach.

Vera gazed between us, her features fixed and stern. Her dark eyes settled on me with something like respect and, for a moment, I felt her sorrow. It was a sorrow that stemmed from a lifetime of painful memories, and then she turned away and walked on.

“It’s unfortunate,” Mercedes continued, “that we finally meet under such circumstances, but life doesn’t have a reputation for being fair.” She nodded at Alex and me and walked after Vera.

I sighed and Alex pulled me close.

Well, I supposed that explained a little about Vera.

Most of the crowd had gone, and all that remained were Alex and me, Stefan, and the Del Contes, Fleck—who stayed by Master Antoni’s side, but kept looking over at me with his big eyes—and a few others I did not know who lingered.

Cicero slowly stepped toward us with his wife right behind him. Once he reached us, he wrapped his arms around us, and his entire body started shaking. Alex’s next breath shuddered against me. Sonya slipped her arms around us, holding us tight, as her sadness flooded through my body.

I wasn’t sure which was more difficult. Feeling my own sorrow or seeing it weep from the people I loved.

The wind blew fiercely all around us, full of sadness and pain, swirling like a spirit, and then it was gone.

Chapter 26

Hope

T
he next few days passed in a haze.

The king had locked himself away in his study after the ceremony. The only person permitted to visit him was, well, Gaius—the healer that was really Tran Chiton.

I’d wondered if the king had realized Gaius’s true identity, but then he was probably too distraught to notice or care.

Steerforth’s death at the hands of the shadowguard had hit the people hard, particularly those of Alioth. As irrationally pompous as he may have been, he’d had a good spirit and a strong heart. “He shouldn’t have died like that,” the people said. “So tragic,” they would add.

And I wanted to ask them to find me a death that wasn’t tragic to someone.

Lord Commodus and Danton hadn’t been seen since, nor had anyone seen Kenley Sterling. Lord Vega Sterling, however, had gone mad, thinking his son lost to the mountain.

There were a few of us who knew better.

The dark cloud continued looming over the castle as the people returned to their respective territories. A few of the lords, Aegises, and leaders of the guard had stayed to discuss what was to be done. After all, the shield and stone had been stolen, and power now lay in the hands of Eris. Eris: the head of the shadowguard, the king’s son and my uncle, and the very man who had killed my father. No telling what he would do next.

But without a functional king, making a decision had proven somewhat of a challenge.

There was a small light through all of it, even though it was a very, very dim light. I was alive and so was Alex, and as long as the king remained prostrate—which, at present, seemed indefinite—Fleck wasn’t going anywhere.

“Have you seen Stefan?’ I asked as I walked down the rows of stables.

Alex was waiting for me beside Calyx, and when he heard me he turned around. His cloak cascaded to the ground from his broad shoulders, and I could just see the hilt of his sword gleaming beneath the fabric. His rich green eyes latched on me, and a grin twitched at his lips.

My heart sputtered.

“He’s talking to Sir Armand with my parents,” he said.

I stopped at Calyx’s stable, right before Alex. He held my gaze a moment and then turned away to Parsec. “I thought we could go for a ride beyond the walls,” he said, leading Parsec from the stable.

Riding. It was just what I needed. “But, Alex,” I said, and when he glanced at me over his shoulder, I almost lost my train of thought. “I, uh, can’t leave the castle.”

“Today you can. I had words with the guards.”

“That’s never done any good.” I arched a brow.

“With the king in the state he is, it was simple.”

I looked at him doubtfully.

He leaned closer. “Are you going to trust me or not?”

Heat licked up my neck. “Fine,” I said. “But so help me, if I get in trouble for this, I’ll…”

He leaned so close; his breath warmed my lips. “You’ll what?” he whispered.

My heart thudded in my ears, and I swallowed.

Amusement flickered in his eyes as he backed away and leapt on Parsec as though he’d done it a thousand times. He eyed me with a grin. “So, are you coming?”

I grinned back, leapt on Calyx, and the two of us trotted out of the stables and down the hill to the marketplace. When we reached the main portcullis, the guards merely nodded and let us through.

How?

We trotted easily to the other side, and I glanced back at Alex. “What ‘words’ did you have with the guards?”

Alex looked amused as he stared ahead. “Would you like to know where we’re going?”

So he wasn’t going to tell me.

I arched a brow. “You’ve already got a destination in mind?”

“Of course.” He glanced back at me.

“Are you going to tell me this destination?”

He grinned and looked straight ahead. “No.” And then he kicked Parsec and took off.

“Hey!” I yelled, running Calyx after them.

Alex’s cloak billowed in a cloud behind him as Parsec kicked up clumps of snow and mud in our path. The cold burned my lungs and combed through my air as we ran, and I felt…alive. Alive with hope. Hope that, perhaps, I might be able to feel happiness again.

The pines blurred as we sprinted down the snow-covered path. It was mostly empty, save a few travelers leaving the castle. Alex veered down a narrow road and I followed after him, reveling in the cold and wind and speed.

I had missed riding.

I tried to keep up with Alex, but right as I pressed Calyx, Alex would press Parsec faster. He never looked back, though his satisfaction and joy seeped into every breath I took.

He rounded a sharp corner and slowed to a trot. There it was, hidden in the trees as if it were a part of the forest. The Aegis Quarters. I hadn’t laid eyes upon it since the day, long ago, when I’d first come to this world.

The day I’d first met Thad.

My heart squeezed and my eyes stung. With everything that had happened with my dad, Thad’s betrayal had slipped through the cracks.

My friend.

The one person in the world, aside from my father, who had never judged me or treated me differently because of what I was.

Without thinking, I ran my fingers over the obsidian rook embedded in my scabbard.

How could you do that to me?
I cried in silence as the wind blew hard around me.

I felt Alex’s eyes on me. “He’s not really here, is he?” I whispered, not turning to look at him.

Alex hesitated. “No.”

I nodded.

Alex moved Parsec beside me, and when I glanced at him, his expression was guarded. “I’m sorry. I forgot the last time you were here, Thad was here.” He searched my eyes. “We can go back…”

“No.” I shook my head. “I’ll be fine.”

Alex studied me a moment. “You’re sure?”

I forced a smile. “Yes.”

He waited, and then slid from Parsec and moved to my side to help me down.

I swung my legs around. “Alex, I don’t need any—” he gripped my waist and pulled me from Calyx, holding me so close “—help.” My last word dropped in a whisper as my heart skipped.

He released my waist and stepped back, his features withdrawn, and he walked toward the door.

I took a deep breath and followed him inside. The home was cold and dark, but just as tidy and cozy as I’d remembered it. Alex’s home. And it felt like my home.

Something large and furry bolted toward me and began licking my fingers. Egan stood on his hind legs, clawing at the air—at me—and my eyes burned. I scratched him between the ears and he shoved his wet nose in my palm. “Hey, boy,” I said.

Alex stood behind me, watching us. His eyes flickered to mine, and they looked sad. “I’ll be right back. I need to get some wood.”

I stood and wiped my drool-covered hand on my cloak. “I’ll come with you.”

I followed him out back where a pile of logs had been stacked neatly beneath a wooden cover, protected from the thick blanket of snow. Without a word, we each grabbed as many as we could and took them into the house. Alex arranged a few in the hearth, and with a wave of his hand, they burst into flames.

The warmth already started chasing out winter. I sat down on the floor, warming my hands, and he sat beside me, leaning back on his arms, one leg bent while the other lay outstretched.

“Alex?” I whispered.

He glanced at me sideways.

“Thank you for bringing me here,” I said.

He nodded once. “Can I get you anything?”

“No, thanks. It’s nice just sitting here…with you.”

He grabbed my hand in his and held it, still focused on the fire that crackled in its hearth. I gleaned strength from his touch—his
warmth
—like I always had, and just being here with him put my soul at ease. Even as I thought of Dad.

It was difficult for me, believing Dad was gone. My entire life he’d left me for work—sometimes weeks at a time—and since I’d been at the castle, it had pretty much stayed the same. The only difference had been that I’d been surrounded by a castle and people instead of fields and horses.

But he wasn’t coming back. Not this time.

A tear welled in my eye and I hurried to wipe it on my cloak, but Alex noticed. He always noticed.

“Thaddeus?” he asked.

I shook my head. “Dad.”

He was quiet.

“When are you going back to Alioth?” I whispered, staring absently at the flames. I couldn’t bear the thought of him leaving, and we hadn’t talked about
us
since inside the shroud near Hell’s Peak.

“I’m not,” he said.

My heart swelled. “You’re not?” I looked at him.

He watched the flames, lost in thought. At last, he sat upright and continued, “I spoke with Lord Tosca and he agreed that, in light of everything going on, it would be better if I stayed here and kept an eye on…things.”

I wanted to throw my arms around him, but I didn’t. I wasn’t sure what held me back, either. As a friend, I shouldn’t have hesitated, but he wasn’t just my friend. We’d crossed that fragile line, so where did that leave us now?

He faced me, then, searching my eyes. “Daria,” he whispered, “I’m staying to be with you.”

His words sank deep inside of me.

He really was going to stay this time.

“You’re sure you can?” I replied, not wanting to believe him. Not wanting to hope for him.

“It was too dangerous before,” he said. “But what threatens this world is more dangerous than customs and traditions. Now that your father is gone—” he paused and glanced away briefly “—I trust no one else with your life.”

He was staying.

He turned back to me, leaning close but hesitant. “I have something for you.”

I arched a brow. “The last time you gave me something, you said I’d never see you again.”

“Consider it a late birthday present.” He smiled and tucked a strand of my hair behind my ear, his fingertips lingering on my ear. “Otherwise, I’m not leaving your side unless you order me to.”

The way he was looking at me made me forget to breathe, and I could feel my blood pulsing throughout my entire body.

“It’s in my room,” he whispered. “I’ll be right back. Unless—” he held my eyes “—you want to come with me?”

There was something in his voice that made me realize something: We were alone. Completely and utterly alone. No king or lords or guards or parents. It was just him and me, and…

Egan dropped something in my lap: his bone. He crouched low on the floor and started wagging his tail.

Alex grinned and stood. “I’ll be back.”

“No.” I all but jumped after him. “I’m coming with you.”

Egan scratched my boot.

“I’m sorry, Egan,” Alex said, “but I’m going to have to borrow your friend for…a while.” Alex glanced back at me and my heart pounded.

He laced his fingers through mine and led me up the stairs. The idea of being with him in his room, alone, was both thrilling and terrifying.