The Kiss That Saved Me (The Tidal Kiss Trilogy Book 2) (26 page)

“So?” I ask him and he laughs again.

“So? So, it’s stopping you from really being lethal. You’re too rage fuelled to see the woods through the trees. Real power, real violence comes from a logical calm that is seven steps ahead of its prey. Surely you’ve realised that by now. Solustus is always telling us that’s what caused the guy before him to snuff it,” he looks at me, serious for once, and unassuming. He is reaching deep into me, trying to pull out the truth of my rage. I recoil.

“Titus,” I mutter the word, like it’s a curse, magical and terrible all at once.

“Yeah. His rage, it blinded him. He wasn’t observing what was around him closely enough.” I think about the truth of what he’s saying.
 

It was true; if Titus had been paying attention more closely he might have known Azure had been lying to him, playing him for the fool. I ponder this for a moment.

“I guess… I am pretty mad,” I bite my bottom lip, self-conscious for the first time in ages.

“I’m all ears,” Vex offers himself and I blink a few times, not sure I heard him right.

“You want to get personal now?” I expect him to joke but instead he does something that shocks me, he rubs the back of his neck with his hand. The gesture is one so familiar that I want to cry. It’s what Orion used to do when he was vulnerable or guilty.

“I don’t care. It washes off me like water off a duck’s back.” The phrase isn’t one I’ve heard before and assume it’s British.

“Okay. Well, I was Queen… back with the mer,” I start and he cocks an eyebrow.

“So what, they didn’t put enough sparkle on your tiara or something? Got into a spat with your favourite nursemaid, did we Love?” He rolls his eyes and I scrunch up my face.

“No! Are you going to let me tell the story? Or are you just going to make fun of me? Because that’s not really how sharing works,” I spit and his face immediately forces itself straight.

“Sorry. Please continue Your Highness,” he says it, bowing, and I debate slapping him. Instead I choose to unload the weight that’s been sitting on my heart, materialising as violence, ever since I fled the Occulta Mirum.

“Anyway, there was this guy. He and I… well, I thought we were made for each other. Things were great to start with, but then I died and things sort of got screwed up. Then he became the Crowned Ruler and proposed. But I didn’t want to get married. I guess it was because he was too over protective and I felt trapped. Anyway, he screwed everything up. He was so controlling, he got paranoid and greedy with me. It was like, oh my god, am I not enough for you or something!? It was never enough. No matter how hard you try, or how much you change, some people are never goddamn happy! So now, I’m here.” I breathe out, almost exhausted from my ramble and he looks at me, suddenly interested.

“You died?” He moves forward, like he may grab my hand, instead he folds his arms across his chest, wearing a suspicious stare.

“Yeah, I was kind of involved in this prophecy. Titus tried to sacrifice me and well, I died because of it. Only for a bit. Orion didn’t deal with it well.”
 

“So it’s the guy, Onion, the one I saw you with at the coronation?” he runs a finger along his jawline, intrigued.

“Orion.”

“Onion seems to fit, Love, he’s making you cry for sure. I’ve heard you at night,” he smirks and I roll my eyes.

“Yes. It’s him! After I died, he wouldn’t let me go anywhere on my own! He was too afraid I’d get hurt, like I’m some freaking china doll! It was pathetic! What’s worse he had this whole
oh I’m so repressed and strong, I’ll just fuck my woman to death
, routine going on. He takes everything out on me! It’s not even my damn fault! It’s just life!” I exclaim, imitating Orion’s deep voice. I wonder what Vex will say next. I don’t even like him, but I’m afraid his blunt honesty will be something I don’t want to hear. “He’s like a goddamn child for pities sakes.”

“You didn’t like that I take it?” He asks me and I shake my head.

“No, he was too controlling. It was like he loved me too much. He couldn’t see what I really wanted anymore, and he actually really doesn’t care, either.” I admit.

“What do you want?” He looks at me seriously, bending his head slightly so he’s looking down at me.

“I just… I don’t know. That’s what scares me. I had a life, I was a teenager, and then BAM! I’m a mermaid and a Queen in like the space of a few months. I lost myself. Completely. I think because falling in love with him came with also dying and turning into a mer… I think I sort of melded into what he wanted me to be. Which is the most awful, ridiculous thing that could have happened. So yeah, I don’t know what I want, but I know what I don’t want. I don’t want some man ruling my life, particularly not one that comes with the emotional capacity of a four-year-old! He’s supposed to be like five hundred or something, he acts about twelve.” I feel the confession free me, crossing my arms. I smile slightly to myself, the cruel things passing my lips are true and so I care little about whether they’re fair. Vex’s forehead is creased.

“That… wasn’t exactly what I was expecting, Love.”

“What were you expecting?” I ask him, boldness flowing through me. I look at him squarely, grateful that he is here for the first time since we met.
 

“I don’t know. Something whiny,” he waves a hand and I punch him on the arm.

“Hey!” I smile so he can tell I’m joking.

“Your smile…” He says, eyes narrowing and his lips spreading slightly.

“What?” I blush a little.

“It’s just… you should do it more often. I’d say you aren’t totally hideous.”
 

It is the only compliment I feel he’s ever given that he’s actually meant. I’m not sure how to take it. I don’t know what we have, it’s not simple and it’s not tender. It is raw, fragile, and borderline disdain. None the less, it is supporting me while I stumble around in the darkness of my own anonymity, and for now, I am grateful.

“Focus,” his demand reaches me as his latest test looms.
 

Flashes of baited deep-sea creatures illuminate the space around me, a visual distraction. Finding calm amongst the chaos, the jumping of my own nerves, as Vex shoots in and out of the strobing light looking terrifying and threatening as his dark eyes reflect the whiteness of the light back at me. I close my eyes, breathing in and out, centring myself and concentrating on nothing but my own heartbeat. The calm has replaced the rage I was using to muster strength a few days ago.
 

I am now cool, calculating, untouchable.
 

I become the ultimate vision of myself, sensing Vex before he’s even at an arms’ length proximity, reaching out and slamming my palm into him. Then, using a burst of electricity at the last second of impact, I send him falling backward. The light doesn’t bother me anymore and neither does the dark. I am totally aligned with myself, with what needs to happen, with what I need to do and how I need to do it.
 

He moves again, stirring around in the shadow, and I manoeuvre instantaneously, pivoting on nothingness and catching one of his tentacles as it wraps around my wrist, using the limb against him as I tug its thick mass across my body, using his weight and length against him. I toss him sideways into the dark and here him hit rock.
 

“Well, I’d say my work here is done,” I hear Vex sounding satisfied as I turn and see him rising up through the water, I’m glad to see he looks a little dishevelled.

“I. Kicked. Your. Ass.” I declare, smug as hell and flushed at the power I feel running through me.
 

“I let you kick my ass,” he folds his arms and twists his mouth into a smirk.

“Oh… don’t give me that crap. I had you,” I bob up and down in the water slightly, like a boxer rolling on and off the balls of my feet, waiting for the next strike and knowing it won’t even get close to me.

“Had… me? Trust me Love, there was no having of anything. If you’d had me… you’d be a lot worse for wear,” his smile is salacious and I act faux shocked, cocky and confident.

“So we’re done?” I deflect away from the innate sexuality that thrums beneath every single word he utters.

“We’re done. I thought I’d take you out. There’s one more thing I haven’t taught you yet,” he smiles knowingly to himself, his flat forehead creasing at the thought.

“Why are you smiling?” I ask him feeling upbeat and ready for whatever he throws at me next.

“I’m smiling, Love, because for this next part, I get to see you naked,” he gestures upward and we begin to swim away from the site we’ve been using to train and toward the exit of the crevasse.

“What do you mean? Naked?” I feel my skin tingling.

“I’m going to teach you to phase.”

“Phase?”

“Yes, turning human again.”

“Is it the full moon?” I pray momentarily that he says no.

“No, we don’t need that,” he looks at me, bored, like he expected my response, like I’m so predictable. We move past a six gill shark, skulking in shadow, moving silently and rise above it, my lungs feeling like balloons, deflating as they loosen at the decreased pressure.

“So you guys can just choose to have legs?” I feel joy stir in my stomach. I wonder momentarily if one could live a normal life as a Psiren. Choosing only to be in the sea when you wanted to be. I had loved being a mermaid, everything about it, except that feeling of being trapped at times, unable to re-join the human world.
 

It’s weird what you miss when that is stripped away, like shoes, and walking in the rain.

“Yeah. It’s a tad more complicated, Love. But basically,” he doesn’t give anything away, leaving me wanton for information. We move together, now equally matched in speed, despite the differences in our anatomy. Rising, we leave the darkness behind, and yet carry it with us, as we head toward the shore.

ORION

The sun is setting over the horizon. Another day gone and I feel her slip from me just a little. It’s my own fault. I did this. I pushed her. I told her not to come back. Who knew she’d actually listen? That words could do as much damage as a fist or a sword… maybe worse. Who knew? The demons we had been so freed from had returned. I had sent the Knights out twice in the last few days to fight them back, to slaughter them, but I didn’t go with them. I had lost my fight. They were breaking through the fault lines with no explanation as to why. I can’t help but wonder if it’s because the darkness is getting stronger.

I am in the throne room, my title the only thing left of me, and the only thing I hadn’t wanted. The crown weighs heavy on my mind, my inability to think clearly without her is making me an inadequate ruler, crown or not. It isn’t baubles that make a leader. It’s action.

With that thought, I sit upright in the throne carved from the wood of olive trees, native to where I was born. I have been slumped in it for the last hour, watching the light fall over the city, over me, casting shadows. I’m not even sad anymore. Just angry. Angry with myself, angry at Azure, and everyone else for failing to help me get her back. Hell, I don’t need them. I am the Crowned Ruler. If that isn’t good enough for getting what I want, then what’s the point in doing the damn job? I stick my head out into the vertical corridor.

“SATURNUS!” I bark, not the best etiquette, but I am far past patience. He appears from nowhere, alert and on edge. I wonder where he was lurking, maybe he’s been watching me. Regardless, he’s here and he’s prompt so why should I complain.

“Assemble the Knights,” I order him and he raises his eyebrows.

“All of them?” He asks, suspicious.

“Yes, all of them!” I snap and he crosses his arms.

“Are we under attack?”
 

“No.”

“Then why on earth are we assembling the entire squad. It’s sundown, Orion. They’re exhausted, you know they’ve been pulling double duty with the demons’ recurrence in our world.”

“So? I’m the Crowned Ruler and I want them assembled,” I remind him of his place as I turn into the throne room. He moves over me and blocks my path back to my throne.

“May I ask what you want them assembled for?” He folds his arms and floats, an immovable gold and scarlet statue of godly imminence. He doesn’t scare me.

“I’m sending them to collect Callie. This has gone on long enough. God knows what they’re doing to her down there Saturnus. I can’t stand it,” I reveal my intent and his emerald irises blaze angry.

“Are you serious? If you think we’re assembling an army to fix your love life you are quite grossly mistaken, or delusional,” he comes close to me, invading my personal space.
 

“I’m Crowned Ruler, I can do what I please. I need her here to help me rule. It’s for the good of the Kingdom,” I remind him of her place beside me.

“Then maybe you should have taken better care of your personal business, if you’re so concerned about the Kingdom. I’m not having you, a reckless, selfish supplanter leave this city unprotected by sending our only militant force gallivanting after some girl because you couldn’t tame her!” He spits the words in my face and I feel bile rise up in my throat.