The McClane Apocalypse: Book Two (34 page)

“Good. I’m glad you two are taking a break. You need to rest. Don’t overdo it so much. Life’s too short to spend it constantly working, Hannah. Trust me, dear. Don’t waste your life toiling away, not on anything,” her grandmother says.

This direction in their discussion is surprising to Hannah. Her grandmother doesn’t usually sound so low in spirits. Is she feeling this way because the world has changed so much? She usually has an optimistic, glass-half-full kind of way about her.

“Is everything ok, Grams?” Hannah asks with a touch of concern as her grandmother runs her soft fingers over the back of Hannah’s hand with unabashed affection.

“Everything’s fine, Hannah. I just want you to be happy. We can’t afford to wait around for things to happen to us anymore. If you want happiness, then it’s up to you to make it happen now. You are only just starting to live your life, and the country chose a very inopportune time to fall apart. You should be going out into the world more and living a full life, but that isn’t going to happen anymore. You won’t have the opportunities that you would’ve before. Now you’ll have to stay here on the farm,” Grams adds.

“But I never wanted to leave it in the first place, Grams,” Hannah says with a smile.

“I understand, dear. But we would’ve wanted more for you than just settling here with your old grandpa and me. We wanted you to be able to go out into the world and experience things, Hannah. We were hoping that once Reagan had a place in Nashville near the hospital that you could’ve lived with her for a while, but that isn’t possible anymore,” her grandmother says with a touch of sadness.

“No, Grams!” Hannah exclaims. “I wouldn’t have wanted that at all. I love it here. I love you and Grandpa. I wouldn’t have ever wanted to leave. I’m happy here. I always have been. You and Grandpa mean everything to me.”

“I know, Hannah. That’s the problem. You need more in your life than two old farts like us,” Grams says with a chuckle which Hannah does not return. She doesn’t like this talk of being away from them. “We were going to discuss it with Reagan when she came home after graduation. I know she would’ve wanted to take you with her to Nashville. Besides, it’s not like it’s that far away. She could’ve brought you home every weekend. Unfortunately, that is all a moot point now. But I still want you to find joy. I want you to have a life, a family, whatever is going to make you happy, darling.”

Hannah nods but grimaces. The tone of this conversation makes her sad. Her grandmother continues as she turns Hannah around to re-braid her hair for her.

“You can still have happiness in your life even with the current state of things. You can even have a great love in your life or a family or whatever you choose. But you need to take control of your own life. Grandpa and I can’t take care of these things for you. You’re an adult now. We just want you to be happy, honey,” she explains patiently as her fingers deftly twist and twist until a perfect, tight braid hangs down Hannah’s back once again.

“I
am
happy,” Hannah retorts as she turns.

“Your grandfather and I can’t make you happy as an adult woman. You need to start your life. You’re going to want more than what we are going to be able to give you. We’re not going to be around forever. Whatever path you choose to take in this life, we’ll support it. But I’d like for you to not be alone in it,” Grams explains.

“Yeah, I understand, Grams. I do think I’d like to have children someday,” Hannah admits.

“Good. I know you will. You’re so wonderful with Sue’s kids and the new baby,” Grams tells her. “And you’re very good with Kelly’s siblings, as well.”

Hannah’s eyes slide to her grandmother, and for the first time in a long time, she wishes she could see to gauge her grandmother’s reaction. Instead of staring at her, Hannah turns away.

“They’re easy to like. Em and Cory are great,” with a smile, Hannah informs her grandmother, who doesn’t need her to tell her something so mundane and obvious.

“Yes, they are. But Em’s still a young girl, only a few years older than you were when you came to live here on the farm. Remember how difficult a time that was for you? You have a lot in common with this young girl. She’s lost her mother, too,” Grams says and Hannah nods in agreement. “I think you should be careful with his siblings, Hannah. If they get too attached to you- I mostly mean Em- then it will be even harder if he chooses to move away.”

Now her eyes dart to her sagely grandmother again. Move away? Now she sounds like Kelly with all this talk of moving away from the farm.

“Yes, Hannah. I think Kelly may end up leaving the farm,” Grams says calmly and gently touches the side of Hannah’s face. “And I don’t want to see you or the kids be hurt by it. You need to tread lightly with Kelly. I don’t know what is going on between the two of you, but he is a very unpredictable man. He also feels a strong sense of responsibility for those two kids, so he’s going to choose them above all else.”

Hannah nods with a frown. “I know. He loves them so much.”

He’s been gone for over an hour with Cory, away from the farm, running errands and taking the Reynolds to meet the new people. Hannah’s been biting her thumb nail for over an hour. She does not like him being so far from her and for so long a period of time.

Grams sighs before continuing as if this conversation is difficult for her. “And
you
love so easily, Hannah. It’s not the worst trait in the world to have, especially not anymore. But you may want to be a bit more guarded with your feelings where Kelly is concerned. I’ve seen the way he looks at you. And I think I have a pretty good understanding of how you feel about him,” Grams’s words make her blush with embarrassment.

Why is it that when she had attempted to be less transparent around everyone when Kelly was about that it hadn’t worked? She needs a lesson in stoicism from Kelly, the master himself.

“I’m sorry, Grams. I didn’t expect to feel anything like this for him. To tell you the truth, I didn’t expect to ever feel like this about anyone. I’ve never met anyone like Kelly before. He’s so different,” she confides while twisting her fingers in her apron.

“I know. And sometimes I wonder if that’s the source of your fascination with him, because you’ve never been around anyone like him. You’ve led kind of a sheltered life here with me and Grandpa. Other than the few friends you’ve had at church and your sisters, you’ve only had us. I just worry that your attraction to him is because he is so different,” her grandmother says as gently as she can manage.

“No, I don’t think that’s what it is. He’s interesting, too. And not just because he’s different. I like the side of Kelly that no one else gets to see. He rarely shows it to me, either. But when he does, he’s so tender and caring and we talk and talk. I like listening to him talk, that is when I can get him to,” Hannah mumbles with a scoffing laugh.

“Yes, well he must be reserving all of his talking for you because he sure doesn’t say much around the rest of us,” Grams agrees and also laughs. “But I think he’s a good man, Hannah. I just worry about you.”

“Me, too,” Hannah admits with honesty.

“There’s so much good in you, so much love to give someone. I just don’t want you to be hurt by all of this. The world isn’t as simple as it used to be. It’s going to become a very harsh place to live, and the rules of the past aren’t going to matter anymore. Kelly may leave tomorrow for all we know,” Grams tells her, and Hannah feels a piercing of pure panic run up her spine.

“I couldn’t bear that, Grams,” she confides with a sigh of defeat.

“I know, honey. You just think about what I’ve said. I’m going to go and lie down for a spell, ok?” her Grams asks as she stands and places her hand upon Hannah’s shoulder for but a moment. “I love you, Hannah. You’ll know what to do when the time is right.”

And before Hannah can even question what she means, Grams leaves her flower garden and walks toward the house. Now she feels even more confused. What had Grams meant by that?

Hannah sits another few minutes before she decides that a stroll will cure her aching back and ease her troubled mind. In some places, closer to the barn, the ground is still slightly wet, possibly even muddy. She treads carefully so as not to ruin her clothing. It isn’t like an employee at the catalog company from which Grams ordered her dresses is still going to answer their phones should she need to purchase more.

As she closes in on the front porch of the house, Hannah can hear men talking around the far corner near the driveway. It’s Kelly and Cory. They’re finally back, but just as Hannah is about to go to him and make sure they are both safe and sound, she hears pieces of their conversation that makes her stop.

“...I don’t know, Kelly. I think we got it good here, you know?” Cory asks.

There is a jumbling of noise, the tailgate of the truck opening or closing- she’s not sure which- and Molly barks twice for attention.

“Yeah, I know. But there’s about ten open condo units over there. Me and you and Em could settle in there really well, I think,” Kelly rebuts and grunts as he must lift something.

“I guess so. Those families seem like they’re pretty cool,” Cory counters. “Where do you want this?”

“Here, set it on top of this crate till we’re ready to go in,” Kelly tells his brother.

She has no idea to what they are referring, but she also doesn’t want to come out and ask them. It seems important to just listen to what they are discussing.

“I think those families seem ok, too. And let’s face it, they could probably use our help,” Kelly tells his brother.

“You’re right. I just like it here, though. Em really likes it. But I guess they do have some girls close to Em’s age over there. That would be the most important thing. We need to make sure Em could have some kind of normal life and friends and shit,” Cory agrees. No, this can’t be happening!

“I want you to take a few days and think about it,” Kelly says so easily. “We won’t be doing anything until John and Reagan come back. I won’t leave the family without the extra help from us right now. It wouldn’t be safe.”

“Right. That’d be bad,” Cory says, his voice straining. They must have brought things back from their short trip.

“We could move over there in a week or so. I’d want to get settled in before winter. We’d also need to go foraging for supplies,” Kelly says around the sound of a vehicle door slamming. “We can’t just take things from here. The family will need everything they’ve harvested. We would need to hit the neighborhoods and maybe make a few city trips, too.”

No, no, no, Hannah wants to scream at him! This is disastrous. Why does Kelly always want to leave the farm? Is it to get away from her? Can that be his only reasoning behind something so crazy and dangerous? She knows he has feelings for her. He’s kissed her more than once. Their last tryst in the back of the barn when he’d lifted her against the wall had left them both panting and heady. At least she’d thought Kelly had felt the same. Could she have been so wrong in her analysis of their relationship?

“Cool. I’d like to help with that, Kelly,” Cory says with way too much enthusiasm. “But what about Hannah?”

Yes, what
about
Hannah?

She waits for what seems like forever, but Kelly’s reply to this never comes and they both walk away soon after. Did he not want to answer this? Had he given his brother some sort of non-verbal communication hand signal? Had he not wanted to answer his brother? Cory hadn’t pushed him, so perhaps there wasn’t an answer or Kelly had given Cory a nasty look. Was he upset with Cory for even asking?

This is all so distressing for Hannah that she crosses the lawn and sits on the old tire swing in the front yard, swinging to and fro. Why does he constantly push her away? She is tired of Kelly’s denial of her, tired of him rejecting her and mostly tired of her own weakness and inability to sway him. Maybe Grams is right. She needs to take control of her own destiny.

Chapter Twenty-one

Reagan

“In here!” John whispers urgently as he holds open the door to a building with many tall windows.

She’s not even sure where the hell they are. They were on their way to the Home Depot by the front entrance area when a small band of people, mostly men it seemed, dashed across the four lane road to their northeast. She’d simply followed him at his sharp command to do so as John led her in the opposite direction. They’d gone down about a city block, further away from the building supply super center toward more stores, but John had hooked a right into a delivery alley with many, many loading docks. After three or four hard shoves of his shoulder, he blasts through a door to one of these buildings.

He pulls her sleeve to follow him as they move fast toward a set of stairs. The area is very dark which makes it extremely nerve-wracking. “Stay close,” he whispers over his shoulder as he flicks on his flashlight.

“Got it,” she whispers back. Apprehension unfurls within her stomach, causing her to feel nauseous.

“Up, up,” John tells her as he holds the flashlight in front of them and urges her to go first. She’s not sure why he’s doing this, but she does as he says. He doesn’t usually like her to go ahead of him. When she turns around, he’s still at the base of the stairwell listening. Then he takes a piece of the cord he’d looted earlier from another hardware store and quickly ties an unusual knot on the bar of the door to prevent anyone else from using this for an entrance. Smart.

She keeps moving toward the top of the dark, creepy-as-shit stairwell. This feels like one of those awful scary movies where the victims try to sneak away from some ghostly apparition or predatory alien but end up getting slashed in the end anyway. Reagan has to remind herself that this isn’t a movie but real life. It’s no less frightening, however.

Within seconds he has caught up to her, taking the stairs two and three at a time. He doesn’t stop to go through this first door, though, but keeps moving another full flight up where he finally does. Reagan feels slightly breathless, but it’s not from the three flights. This is anxiety, and she’s learned to recognize it so well in the last six months.