The Pentagram Child: Part 1 (Afterlife Saga Book 5) (15 page)

“That’s quite a heavy mind you’ve got there, Beautiful” He said as he raised two gloved hands to my face and used his leather covered thumbs to wipe away my remaining tears. I swallowed what felt like a heartbroken lump and looked up at him as he twisted round to face me. I felt my bottom lip start to vibrate and quickly pulled it into my mouth to try and stop the next round of tears from falling.

“Oh sweetheart, come here,” He said pulling me to his chest after shifting fully on his bike. I went to him willingly and let it all go. I cried until I shook and hiccupped every breath I needed to keep going, dragging it painfully into my lungs. I don’t know how long we stayed like this but he only allowed me to pull away from him after he was sure all my tears were spent.

“Feel better?” I nodded at his question and wiped my eyes with my long sleeves.

“Good because we need to talk.” He said letting go of me and getting off his bike to walk to the edge of the cliff face. I looked around and thanks to the full moon was able to make out where we were. I sucked in a startled breath as the last time I had come here I was also with Vincent but under very different circumstances. He turned to look at me over his shoulder and said,

“I could not think of a better place to have this conversation that would prove my point more,” and then he looked back over towards the rugged mountains where I knew Draven’s cave was hidden away in the jagged rock.

“I can’t go back there.” I even shuddered at the thought, hugging myself.

“And I would not expect that you could but being here, as close as we are, will be enough I think.” I took in what he said and for long moments didn’t move. Thankfully he seemed to know that I needed the time, waiting for me silently with his back to my internal struggles. Finally I nodded to myself and got off the bike to walk slowly over to him. I saw him lift his head to the clear summer sky above as if basking in the moonlight that gave his perfect skin a divine quality. He had never looked more angelic than at this moment.

“Vincent?”

“Umm.” He made a noise almost like he was letting me know he was still with me but was also half consumed with absorbing some kind of energy from above. I placed my hand up on his shoulder as I asked,

“Are you alright?” finally making him break his invisible connection to, I didn’t know what and look down at me stood at his side.

“Truthfully?” I said and I nodded ready for whatever he had to say…or at least hoping that I was.

“I don’t think I ever will be alright until my brother is also.” I winced at this.

“Vincent I…”

“Before I begin, I want you to know that you have not one thing to be sorry for… do you understand, Keira?” He asked interrupting what was going to be an apology on my part in what happened tonight.

“Do you?” He pushed again making me nod, if only to make him feel better. He took in a deep breath and nodded back at me.

“You and your sister are close, are you not?”

“Yeah, we’re close.” I said quietly, having a very good idea where he was going with this.

“And when you hurt, she hurts doesn’t she?” My breathing hitched and I felt the watery film over my eyes suspended there as I tried to gather my emotions back, willing them not to fall again. I thought back to being taken and seeing her for the first time at the hospital.

Many times since I had shamefully thought how I would have handled it if our situations had been in reverse. How I would have felt seeing my sister in that hospital bed, the one broken and not only bleeding on the outside. How hopeless I would have felt for weeks after, seeing her close in on herself. Witnessing more and more with each passing day you lose the sister you once knew. The pain and the anger that flashed across her eyes, all as though she was trying to absorb the hurt right out of me and take it on herself.

It was all there as plain as night watching it passing through Vincent’s eyes. The pain and the anger as though he wanted to take the same hurt from his brother just to ease his suffering…a suffering that by me being here was only adding to the weight of them all. Three close siblings who although so very different were also so very similar. If one of them hurt then all of them hurt and it was only now that I was discovering just how much that hurt had cost them.            

And now it was time for my brutal truth.

I didn’t need to word my answer to him as he saw it all play out across my face as the realisation came to pass.

“So now you know.”

“Yes…
now I know,”
I whispered turning away from him, the view and the place where I knew his cave lay waiting, everything that held me hostage in this hopeless situation.

“It was all his choosing, Vincent.” I said letting the agony transform my voice to one of torment.

“But see, that’s where you’re wrong, Keira…this…this type of pain is never anyone’s choosing. You think he wanted to hurt you this way…? By the Gods, Keira even I didn’t understand it but now…”

“And now…?” I snapped, swinging back round to face him again.

“And now I know that he really had no choice at all.” I shook my head and said bitterly,

“But let me guess, it’s not your place to tell me why.”

“It is not my place, no. Just as it also isn’t Dom’s.” I let out a frustrated huff and raised my arms dramatically only to fall back again.

“Right! How perfect! This is my life and the decisions made that affect it I not only don’t have a say in, but I don’t even get to bloody know what the reasons are! You can surely see where I would have a problem with that…right?!”

“I do.” He agreed calmly in spite of my mounting rage.

“As does Dom,” he added when I let out a sigh making my mouth nearly drop open in shock.

“What?!”

“Did you really imagine Dom was finding any of this easy? Did you really think making any of these decisions, decisions that he knew would break you
both
, came easy to him?” He asked his voice getting hard and I stuttered for a moment,

“Well I…well, no but…”

“And did you really think that bearing the weight of these decisions was going to be easy to live with, knowing it was for the rest of his days?”

“I…no of course not but…”

“No! No they were not. I even admit myself that up until I finally knew why I could not understand the level of love needed in making them but make no mistake Keira, that was exactly what it took.” On hearing this I fell back a step unable to believe his words.

“What…what do you mean?” I asked on a whispered breath. Vincent looked away from me and looked down at the ground as if needing to compose himself before speaking again.

“Answer me something, Keira, you were angry at my brother when hearing why he came back here, were you not?”

“Yes I was because he didn’t come back here for me…he…he came back because of Alex.” I said straightening my back and clenching my fists at my sides.

“See that’s where you’re right but also very, very wrong.” He looked back up and then turned to me again to take in my defensive stance. He shook his head in what looked like frustration and then hit me with the painful truth.

“So you’re angry at that but tell me, how painful would it have been for you to know that Dom knew of you and this Alex but did nothing… simply because he didn’t care.” At this my shoulders slumped and I bit my lip as all that he said hit its mark with deadly accuracy. Thinking this would have indeed been far, far worse. Him knowing about us and doing…
nothing,
God but that thought alone nearly brought me to my knees!

I had spent so much time being pissed at Draven that I didn’t think for even a minute what him acting this way really meant. How I would have felt if he had done nothing, reacting as if he didn’t care but he hadn’t done that now had he? No, he had acted in the complete opposite. So that could only mean one thing…

“He…he still cares for me?” I said shocked that I could even make the words pass through my lips. Vincent’s lips quirked into a small smile before saying,

“But of course he does. There is not a being alive that would not act that way unless there was love driving their actions.”

“But if he still cares then why doesn’t he just try and get me back…why has it taken this long for him to…?”

“Don’t do that to yourself, sweetheart.” He interrupted quickly.

“Do what?”

“Hope for what he can’t allow to happen.” He finished sadly.

“So that’s it! He breaks my heart for reasons I will never know and you not only tell me his own heart is breaking from his decision but also that he can never do anything to fix it!?” This time it was Vincent’s turn to sigh and clench his gloved fists.

“That’s what I am telling you.” I sucked in a sharp breath surprised at what I should have been ready for.

“So that’s it for us…there’s…there’s no use fighting anymore is there?” I tried to get it out without letting the tears fall but what was the use, they were already streaming down my face in an angry flow that I hadn’t even realised until now.

“Oh, Keira… haven’t you realised it by now…?” He waited for me to look back up at him and when I did he held out his hand to me. I ran to him as I had no strength in me to fight against my need for his comfort. He held me to him and I looked up to see him looking directly at the cave I knew was hidden there. And when looking there I saw we were no longer alone as Ava was seen circling overhead watching us, making me wonder if Draven could also see us?

These thoughts evaporated when he finished with the most important statement of all,

“…You don’t have it in you to ever stop fighting for him.” And I answered him the only way I knew how…

With the truth.

“I know.”

We were now on our way back with me as before, clutching onto Vincent as we sped down empty roads. We didn’t have much more to say to each other after that, as what else was there to say. It was obvious the pain Vincent endured watching his brother walk this lonely path that the Oracle had sent him down. It was also obvious that no matter what either of us said or did, that he would continue to walk it even if there was no point to the destination at the end.

This was what I just needed to accept. Even if what Vincent had said made me face the truth. That I would never really stop fighting for him but the difference was that sometimes even as we continue to fight the good fight it didn’t mean that the war hadn’t already long since been lost. I didn’t say this to Vincent but I didn’t need to. All he needed to do was look at it written there, etched deep in my anguish of someone already beaten. But he surprised me. The last thing he did was look back to the cave one last time and say,

“You know of the truth untold but now… well, now I think it is time for his own truth to be found.” And without explaining it fully he took my hand and led me back to his bike.

It was as if nothing more needed to be said. And as I held on it gave my mind plenty to think about as I watched the road unravel ahead. It was time to be honest with myself and finally let go of the past. I had been hurting for so long now it was easier to feel bitter than to hold on to hope. It was easier to be angry at Draven than wonder too deeply what his own feelings could be. But really, where did any of that get me? It didn’t make me feel better, if anything it made me feel worse. And my cutting words to him, that nobody would deny he deserved on some level, but what did they really achieve? They just ended up hurting someone I loved and that wasn’t what I wanted.

I think I could safely say that he knew how much he had wounded me and for reasons, it was obvious I would never find out, he felt like he had no other choice to make. So why make him suffer more? No, from now on I wasn’t going to do that to him. I was going to let go of the past year and look to the hard reality of a future that didn’t include him and me ever being together again. But that didn’t mean we couldn’t still be friends now, could it? Well, I was definitely going to give it a try because Vincent was right, I wasn’t going to give up on him.

I didn’t have it in me.

These tangled thoughts brought me all the way to our destination and I frowned when I saw it wasn’t the one I had been expecting.

“Err…Vincent, why are we back here?” I asked as he shut down his bike. He kicked down the stand and looked over his shoulder to wink at me.

“No time like the present to start turning over that new leaf of yours.” He said smirking.

“You were listening?!” I screeched in panic.

“Honey, your mind was screaming at me so loud I could hear you over the engine.” I groaned as I realised my mistake. It seemed like all that time I spent guarding my mind in front of Draven, that when I was no longer in his presence my exhausted brain just flopped down in front of the telly, to put her feet up and let any bugger in!

“Great.” I responded dryly making Vincent laugh.

“We don’t even know that I will still be welcome after…” At this Vincent burst out laughing stopping me in my tracks. He was still chuckling as he pulled me off his bike and walked me back towards the building…

Back to Afterlife.

“I don’t think we need to worry about that.” He said nodding ahead of him and my eyes followed to find Draven stood there waiting and leaning against the stone wall next to a side door that Vincent used as our exit earlier. I would like to have said I was cool as a cucumber but with a faltered step that nearly made me trip over myself and my face no doubt sporting an attractive puffiness from crying, well… that cool wasn’t even in the building to start with, let alone given the chance to go flying out the window!

The closer we got the more my palms began to sweat praying I wasn’t about to walk back into a showdown. I noticed he had changed out of his suit and to say the sight of him didn’t affect me would have sent me straight to Hell as a sinner. He now had his strong long legs encased in faded denim that moulded to him in a way that you couldn’t help but notice the size of his powerful thighs. Christ but even the slight rips at his knees that showed that slither of skin made my girly parts tingle.

My eyes shamelessly did an all body scan and when I reached his chest my mouth went dry. Well, I was only human! But come on, the sight was just too unfair for words. He wore a tight, long sleeved t-shirt that was a dark grey with a design etched on the front that was the back end of some vintage car.