The Shattered Genesis (Eternity) (85 page)

             
“No!” I grasped his face even more firmly, “That will accomplish nothing and despite my
disbelief that he would say such a thing and despite my anger, he is still my brother.”

             
“You don’t deserve for people to treat you this way, Brynna.” James tol
d me firmly and his eyes rose to lock on mine again. “You do know that, don’t you?”

             
“Of course I do, James. That does not mean that I can stop them, does it? He was angry. I know that now…” I stopped, not believing a word of what I was saying in regards t
o Elijah.

             
“No, you don’t.” He sensed my lie and called me on it immediately. “You don’t have to defend my honor to him or anyone else. I don’t feel weird about us being together. I don’t feel any shame in telling people about it.”

             
“Neither do I!” I told
him honestly, “I don’t know why people are getting all bent out of shape about it.”

             
“Because it’s something to talk about. In Elijah’s case, he thinks it’s right to object because by the old world standards, our relationship would be considered very
weird. He also thinks that he’s protecting you from me. I'm sure that he really does believe that you're with me just so I'll coddle you, as you said. But how he can blame you for what happened...” He stopped and clenched his jaw in anger. When he continue
d, his voice was quieter from his effort to suppress that fury.

             
“Several people do, James.”

             
“I don't know how anyone can blame you for what happened to him after what happened to you!”

             
“Elijah and Violet know absolutely nothing of that and I intend to k
eep it that way, James.”

             
“Why? So they can keep blaming you for something that never could have been your fault, even if that hadn't happened?”
             
“I will take their anger, resentment and pain over their pity, James. You know that to be true. You know the
full extent of what happened with my godfather?”

             
“I do. You told me.”

             
“I didn't tell you. You already knew.”

             
“Yes, but you've discussed it with me.”
             
“The reason why is because I knew that you wouldn't pity me. I knew that if you and I were going to ent
er into a relationship that I needed to be honest with you. When I began to pull away, you deserved to know why. You needed to know that the reason why I am afraid of intimacy is because of him.”

             
He grasped my hand.

             
“I would never hurt you that way, Bryn
na. Not like he did. Whatever his name is…”

             
“Michael. His name was Michael. He was Maura’s husband. Because of that and because he was my father’s best friend, we called him ‘Uncle Mike.’ He worked overseas for my father and when he came home, he lavished
all of us with gifts, me especially. At first, I was thrilled. What little girl does not want clothes from Paris, stuffed animals from Japan…” I trailed off, deciding against describing the worst part of it all.

             
James put one hand on my face. He kissed m
e tenderly.

             
“You don’t have to tell me anymore if you don’t want to. But I think this is good for you, sweetheart. Have you ever told anyone about it?”

             
“No. But everyone knew. There was a trial. It was a huge to-do, believe me. It was still getting press
, even seven years after it happened. The entire saga was used as a weapon against my mother. I might not have agreed with her politically, but suggesting that her absence in our home resulted in a disgusting pedophile being able to assault her daughter is
an accusation that is untrue, at best. At worst, it’s completely reprehensible. It is incredibly sexist, also, and you know how I just love that.” I rolled my eyes and scowled. “Plus, I did not appreciate being used as a weapon in the war of politics.”

             
“Who
would
want that? But especially after something like that...” He shook his head, unsure of how to handle that particular topic. It was hard for people to imagine, I knew. Most people on Earth had been lucky in that they did not have to live from elect
ion to election as they grew up. They did not have
to be slandered and used as a tool of manipulation in the great game of sympathy, anger and fear, with the great victory of votes.

             
“Yes. It was quite unfortunate for everyone involved, not just me.” 

             
“I
f there was a trial, then you must have told someone about it after it happened.”

             
“I told my mother, surprisingly enough. She confronted Michael. She was
livid
. She had me seen by a doctor who confirmed that what I had said occurred actually had. If you h
ad seen me during that appointment, after what had happened to me...” I shook my head slightly as the screams and cries that had erupted from me that day echoed in perfect clarity through my mind.

             
“Your mom was there with you, though, wasn't she?”

             
“Yes.
I will say that I am thankful for her presence in that case, at least. She managed to calm me down enough for them to gather whatever information it was that they needed to gather.”

             
“So they were able to prove it, then?”

             
“I said that already, James Maxwe
ll.” I scolded him only somewhat seriously.

             
“You did.” He realized, and his hands tightened around mine. “I'm sorry, baby.”

             
“It is alright. Michael lied his way out of it. I will not tell you how cruel he was to me after he found out that I had told.” My
voice was devoid of emotion as I retold the awful experience to him. It was the first time I had ever spoken outwardly about it with a third party. I could feel the heavy weight lifting from me as I spoke.

             
“What about Maura? What did she do?”

             
“She was a
lways in the house when it happened. He started giving me a sedative to keep me quiet. Before I would succumb to the drug, though, I would scream for her. I would…” I stopped again, ashamed of what I was about to say.

             
“Go on. It’s okay.”

             
“I would
beg
her
, James. I would plead with her to stop him. She would cry and cover her ears, screaming to me that she was
so
sorry
.” I rolled my eyes and then paused for a long moment. After looking away from him, I came back to my senses somewhat.

             
“I do not know why
I am telling you this.”

             
“It doesn’t matter why. The point is that someone is hearing it.”

             
“I swore I would never speak of it again. I made my mother swear that we would pretend it never happened. She was apologetic for allowing Mike to convince her that
I was just projecting his image onto the face of the true person who had done that to me. He also told her that I was a fanciful little girl who enjoyed making up dramatic stories like what I read in my books. His lies were outrageous, to say the least. I
never would have believed them. I swore a lot of things to myself after that. I swore I would never allow a man near me again. I swore I would never be vulnerable like that again. What you and I are doing now goes against everything that I have ever believ
ed.”

             
“And how do you feel about going against everything you’ve ever believed?”

             
I smiled slightly as I looked into his eyes again.

             
“Because it is you, I don’t mind. At least not anymore. If there is one thing I can say with absolute certainty and with n
o shame, it is that I trust you, James. You promised me a moment ago that you would never hurt me that way and I believe you with no doubt in my mind. You do not have even a trace of that cruelty in your heart. I trust you.”

             
How he had managed to break
through the defensive walls of everything I had ever sworn to myself, every protective measure that I had set into place, I will never fully understand. I give all the credit to fate; James and I were meant to be together for reasons that were unclear to u
s then.
             

             
“Good,” He kissed my hand, “I know that your trust is hard-earned. I appreciate that. I won’t ever make you sorry. I promise.”

             
I nodded.

             
“I have never told anybody this before. It is strange, to share it so openly. I do feel a great deal of sha
me, which is why what Elijah said was so incredibly hurtful. If I had feelings, they might have
been hurt.”

             
“Oh, Lord…” James rolled his eyes. “That’s another Brynna-ism.”

             
I grinned.

             
“I can never outwardly admit being hurt. That’s why I never cry. It’s
weakness. I don’t tolerate weakness in myself or in those that I helped raise. That’s why Violet gets the brunt of my insanity. You know, I look at Violet and Penny, and I cannot imagine turning them away if they came to me with that. If they told me that
the worst had happened, I would believe them. I would not doubt for a second that they were being absolutely truthful. I would kill the man responsible as painfully as possible. I would feel no remorse for it. That is a horrible, immoral truth. It goes aga
inst everything we are taught when studying anything spiritual. But it is the
only
truth, James.”

             
“You don’t have to justify that to me. You don’t have to apologize for that. I understand because that’s how I feel about you. I’d kill anyone that threatene
d or hurt you. You don’t have to worry about being hurt like that again. It will never happen while I’m here. I know that you are more than capable of taking care of yourself. But I’ll always be right behind you, watching over you. I promised you that, did
n’t I?”

             
I nodded, feeling tears well in my eyes. I reached up to swipe them away before they fell. We had covered a landmine-strewn emotional field together. I had discussed the horrid experience that defined my childhood with him when I had never been ab
le to stomach the subject with anyone else. But I still would not cry in front of him. I would not cry in front of anyone. Quite simply, I would not cry at all, ever.

             
“Damn you, James Maxwell, you have made authentic tears come into my eyes.”

             
He smiled a
nd kissed my hand again.

             
“But you don’t have to be upset about it because they didn’t fall, did they?”

             
“Nope. You will never see the day that happens. So don't hold your breath.”

             
“I won’t. I mean what I said, baby. You’re safe now. Your life comes befor
e mine. I can’t…” He put both of his hands on my face, “I don’t know how it happened. I don’t know how my feelings for you grew this quickly. I’m not used to this. On Earth, I was in and out of different relationships from week to week. But you…” He tucked
a stray strand of hair behind my ear, “You’re different. It hasn’t been long since I’ve known you but I think I felt this way from the very beginning, Brynna.”

             
I smiled, feeling more real tears in my eyes. He reached up and wiped them away.

             
“I feel quit
e the same way about you. And I
know
it was from the moment I met you. Well, after I realized that you were not trying to assault and kill me.”

             
“That took awhile.” He told me and we both laughed again. “I knew that you would warm up to me eventually.”

             
“I
have more than warmed up to you. I feel great fondness for you.”

             
“Yeah, you’re not so bad yourself.”

             
“Oh, good.” I said with a smile.

             
“Do you want to go to sleep or do you want to go look around?”