The Shifter's Choice (16 page)

Step back. Let me try to change.

She moved away and watched him as he closed his eyes but nothing happened. He glanced up at her and then cradled his head in his long, clawed hands. Finally his arms dropped to his sides and he looked up at her. The defeat was clear in the hunched shoulders and woeful expression.

I can’t.

Sonia grabbed the phone and made the call. Thirty minutes later she was dressed and they were back in the underground medical facility. Doctor Zharov looked grim and the captain’s bright pink complexion showed he was clearly livid.

Sonia listened carefully to the doctor speak to Johnny, who sat still and silent on the examining table.

“This happened with a small portion of the test subjects. Involuntary change.”

Johnny signed his question.
It was a full moon last night. Does that matter?

Sonia translated and the doctor answered. “No, the moon has no effect on your condition. Superstitious nonsense. Possibly people were more likely to see werewolves in the moonlight. But it doesn’t bring a change.”

Sonia asked the next question. “Johnny and I were together last night.”

Zharov’s brows shot up as he looked from one to the other.

“You said strong emotions can trigger change. Was it because...because...” Words failed her.

Zharov rubbed his chin and considered. “I’m not sure, but I doubt it. I have some tests to run. Then I’ll know better how to answer your question.”

Johnny was signing now. Sonia waited and then turned to the doctor. “He says there was no warning.”

“No. Had you been awake there would have been. Dilation of the capillaries just prior to the change would make you feel flushed, perhaps light-headed.”

Johnny signed again and Sonia spoke. “Why can’t I change back?”

The silence in the room was deafening. Sonia felt brittle as glass as she looked from the doctor to the captain and her hope died. Zharov clasped his hands behind his back and rocked from heel to toe. The captain scrubbed his bristly jaw with his knuckles and winced.

“Answer his question,” she said, her voice a feral growl. The news was bad, obviously, but he was entitled to hear it instead of being kept in the dark. She inched closer to Johnny’s side.

The captain glanced at the door as if he wanted to be anywhere but here. Then he gestured with his head and Zharov backed away and out that same door. Sonia’s chest felt tight as it did when her mother left them alone in the apartment to go out. The air seemed thinner as she tried to breathe.

“You better go,” he said.

She shook her head. She was staying. The captain nodded his acceptance of her decision.

The captain’s mouth went flat and grim. Johnny braced, gripping the edge of the table as he waited for his captain to speak.

“It’s my fault. I wanted you human again, so I told him to go ahead and give you the injection. Zharov said he couldn’t guarantee it. He’s working to make it right. But it looks like you are one of the fifteen percent that doesn’t hold his shape. That means you can’t change back without another injection.”

Sonia’s blood flashed hot. “Don’t you think you should have told him this was a possibility before you gave him the treatment, instead of making the decision without him, sir.” She spat that last word, turning it into an insult.

Johnny motioned for the captain to bring him another shot. Sonia’s ears began to buzz as she recalled his reaction to the first one.

“No,” she said and grasped Johnny’s hand. “We have to wait until they get this right. Until they can be sure that you’ll stay human.”

“That might be a while,” said the captain.

“We’ll wait,” she said, making the decision for both of them, as if she had any right.

Johnny shook his head. She met his yellow eyes and read his thoughts before he even signed to her. He was going through with this.

His fingers moved and his hands swooped.
Not waiting. Bring the shot.

She repeated his order to her commanding officer.

“It isn’t that simple,” said MacConnelly. “Diminishing returns, they call it. You were human for four days. The next time will be less.”

Johnny straightened and began signing.

“How much less?” she said, repeating his question but finding her voice a strangled thing.

“We aren’t sure.”

Johnny was signing again.

Sonia cleared her throat but her voice still cracked. She was coming apart inside stitch by stitch. “He asks, ‘Is there anything that will make me stay human?’”

The comrades exchanged a long look. Finally the captain said, “I’ll arrange another shot but that’s all I can do. But first they are going to need to run some tests on your blood the way it is now.”

Johnny started signing and Sonia’s eyes went wide. She felt her ears heat as the words poured out of him.

“Slow down,” she said.

“What is he saying?” asked her captain.

“He’s angry. I don’t think—”

“Tell me what he said. You’re his translator. Not his damned editor. So translate.”

Johnny now had his arms folded over his chest and was glaring at MacConnelly.

“He said that you need him like this to defend Brianna. You don’t want him human. That you’re just like...” She glanced at Johnny and he spelled the name for her again. “Just like Colonel Lewis?”

The captain’s face went red and his hands curled to fists. Sonia blinked as she noted that his blue eyes were changing color. The captain was fighting off the transformation. She knew it and instinctively stepped closer to Johnny. His arm went about her waist for a moment and then slid away as he began signing again.

“He says he’s not your dog anymore and if he has to die to be human than he’ll die. At least his mother can bury him in a casket instead of dumping him at the vets.” Sonia clasped her arms across her chest as she waited for the captain to speak but he didn’t. Instead he just spun in a half circle and marched out of the room.

She looked at Johnny. “Do you really believe that he would do that to you?”

Johnny didn’t hesitate before shaking his head. He began to sign.
He wouldn’t. But I can’t stay like this anymore, Sonia. I can’t be a monster.

Sonia felt her throat burning and knew she was about to cry. She threw herself against him and he gathered her in his arms.

“You’re not a monster. Just wait. I’ll wait with you. I’ll be able to stay now. We can be together. I’ll live with you. You can cook for me and...we can go home.” Tears choked her as she realized what they’d both lost and threw herself into his arms. He held her for a little while and then set her aside so she could see him sign.

It’s not our home.

“Please, Johnny.”

I want the shot.

Sonia began to cry.

Chapter 13

B
urne Farrell waited for his chaser to return. Chasers were those whose job it was to track and capture their females as soon as they became sexually mature. Most females tried to run. But up until Brianna Vittori, none had succeeded for long. It was a sore spot with him and with his best chaser.

Burne didn’t like Hawaii. Since his arrival, the stars and the moon were too bright and the lack of cloud cover meant it never grew truly dark. The cities here were small and lacked the amenities to which he was accustomed. A creature who moved only in darkness needed a place with 24-hour services and plenty of people venturing out at night. New Orleans, now there was a city that understood the pleasures of the night. He hoped Hagan had finished his sweep of this wretched little volcanic disgorgement so they could continue to the next godforsaken upheaval of rock.

Burne stood on the balcony of the Palm Breeze Hotel inhaling the scent of roasting pig. It seemed they were always roasting something and banging those infernal drums. He saw Hagan Dowling race across the pool deck below, moving at a speed too fast for a human to perceive anything more than a slight breeze. But Burne could see him clearly. His legs pumping and his cadaver-like white arms flashing at his sides. A moment later Hagan knocked on the door of his eighth-floor suite. Farrell had to rent the room wearing the stretchy elastic beige face covering worn by burn victims, a tactic he disliked but was sometimes forced to employ in public.

“Enter,” he commanded and his chaser let himself in, lifting his sensitive nose and then following it to his superior on the balcony.

Hagan’s ghostly composition already showed the telltale road map of blue veins on his arms and face, the pulsing blood vessels engorgement indicating that his chaser had stopped for a meal.

Irritated, Burne scowled.

“Good evening, sir,” said Hagan. “I have heard from Richard Gould. He reports strong signals of a female on the island of Molokai and also the presence of two male werewolves.”

“It’s her!” Burne could not resist pumping his fist in triumph.

“I agree, the signs are good. But he withdrew without visual confirmation, as you requested.”

“Thank God one of my chasers follows orders.” He paced the balcony as his mind raced. “We go in force. Every available man. How long until they are assembled?”

“I can have six chasers here within twenty-four hours. If you are willing to wait forty-eight, I can call in our men in Europe and the Middle East.”

Farrell rubbed one palm over the other. His greed for her urged him to hurry. And the more vampires that knew of her the more he would have to battle for her custody. Still she had evaded six before with the help of her two shaggy protectors. “Call them all. We go when we have a dozen. Two werewolves, even U.S. Marine–trained fighters, cannot possibly handle so many.”

“True. But Gould says they have defenses. I suggest tunneling. The volcanic rock is riddled with existing channels. We could expand them to gain entry well past their perimeters.”

“Fine.”

“I will notify you when we are assembled. Would you like me to make a visual confirmation? I have seen her and would recognize her appearance.”

“No. I don’t want them tipped off. They would move her and we’ll lose her again.” Were all his men so reckless?

Hagan’s mouth went thin and tight. Suspicion stirred in Farrell, rising like filth in a cesspool and he inhaled, finding the scent of a male who was sexually ready. Ready at just the mere mention of her. Was Hagan planning to steal her before he could assemble his team?

Farrell stared and Hagan swallowed. Did his chaser recognize that his master read him so easily? Hagan had best take care that his master didn’t decide to open one of his chaser’s arteries.

“Would you like to relocate to Molokai, master?”

“I’m going to lead the damned raid.”

Hagan lowered his head and nodded. But not before Farrell saw the narrowing of his eyes and the threat burning in their depths. So he had another rival for Brianna. He wondered if he should kill Hagan now or wait until after the capture.

“We will be honored to have you lead this chase, sir,” said Hagan.

And I’ll be honored to water my peonies with your blood,
thought Farrell. He glanced at his chaser with speculation. It seemed doubtful that Hagan would live long enough to see his skin turn the color of a ripe plum.

In a fight, one should always put his money on the old dog.

* * *

Despite Johnny’s insistence, Zharov refused to give him the shot until after all tests were completed on Johnny’s wolf blood and the doctor had a chance to study the results. The following morning the tests were in.

Johnny and Sonia waited in silence in the medical facility for news of what was happening. Johnny knew Sonia didn’t want him to take the shot and she’d done all she could to convince him. But damned if he’d stay like this. He only agreed to wait to could see if his blood work would reveal anything that could help maintain his human form.

It seemed hours before Dr. Zharov arrived in the examining room carrying a thick file folder. He was trailed by Mac, Brianna and Major Scofield. Johnny’s skin prickled at the assemblage.

Brianna moved to the far corner of the room. Johnny knew with one glance at Brianna’s face that the news was bad. Mac, more controlled, still showed a definite tell that Johnny recognized. Whenever he ground his jaw like that, Johnny knew he wouldn’t like what came next.

“Well, it’s not good,” said the doctor without preamble. “Your body’s immune system recognized the invading protein quickly and mounted an attack killing the agent you need to remain in human form.”

Johnny signed a question and Sonia repeated it.

“He wants to know if he can have another dose.”

Mac and Zharov exchanged looks. Brianna folded her hands and studied her white knuckles.

The major stepped forward and lay a fatherly hand on Johnny’s hairy shoulder. “You can, son. But the result will likely be the same and faster this time, as your body has this particular protein on its hit list. It’s a search and destroy with a known target. You understand?”

Johnny nodded and signed to Sonia. He tried not to notice the silver tear stains on her cheeks but they hit him in the gut like the butt end of a rifle.

“He says he still wants the shot.”

Zharov looked to the major who nodded.

“Give it to him.”

Sonia grabbed Johnny’s forearm. “But he almost died the last time.”

“Unlikely now. His body adapts quickly, too damned quickly, to new types of assaults.”

Johnny patted her hand and peeled her away. Sonia shook her head, silently pleading with him not to go through with it. Didn’t she understand, he’d do anything, anything, just to spend ten more minutes as a man. And to spend those minutes with her, it was all he wanted and he’d pay whatever price he must and when the shots no longer worked, well there was always the pistol.

“Do you have anything else, any other studies or something that won’t do this to him?”

Zharov shook his head, fiddling with the tubing of his stethoscope. “I’m working on something but...” He glanced at Mac and Johnny saw the captain give a single shake of his head. What were they hiding? The doctor cleared his throat and continued. “We don’t know why this protein is absent in Lam or how to encourage his body to produce it. We don’t know why he’s rejecting it when it is so prevalent in Captain MacConnelly’s blood. In time we might....”

Johnny pounded his fists on the exam table, denting the metal. The doctor’s words fell off. Johnny pantomimed a shot to his gums.

Zharov nodded and turned toward the door. Twenty minutes later Johnny lay stretched on a surgical table, Sonia standing beside him. Her skin was pale and her eyes round as a doll’s.

“How long will he have this time?” she asked.

Zharov shrugged. “Less than the last time. Two days? I’m not sure.”

Johnny opened his mouth and the serum was injected. Sonia gasped when his eyes fluttered. Zharov watched the machinery but Johnny did not lose consciousness this time. His heart raced and he felt a rush of electric energy shuttering through him, as if he’d touched a live wire. He watched the hair cascading from his hands and gave a little shake, sending more falling. His claws retracted and he saw his trimmed nails and neat, pink cuticles. The pain hit him then and he stiffened like an electroshock patient as his vision blurred. He could hear them, but his sight was gone. The ripping agony became the center of his existence as every muscle seized, then convulsed. The straps broke away and he tumbled to the tile floor. On hands and knees he panted and then retched, finally collapsing to his side.

This was better than the last time? Johnny was suddenly glad he’d passed out during the first shot. Gradually the pain ebbed and his muscles responded to his tentative efforts to control them. He sat up and Sonia draped a sheet around his shoulders, then helped him rise.

“Am I human?” he said, grinning at the sound of his own voice.

“Back on the gurney, Lam. We have to get you to a room. I want to examine you. Find the location of the initial attack,” said Zharov.

“No offense, Doc, but I’m not spending my time in this stinking hospital playing doctor with you.” He grasped Sonia’s hand and headed for the door.

He met Mac just outside and for one minute worried he might order him back. But he didn’t. Instead, he extended his hand and they shook.

“Thanks for the blood,” said Johnny.

“Thanks for not dying on me.” He released Johnny’s hand. “John? I have some information about the night we were attacked in Afghanistan. I had them pull your medical records. Reports from the field hospital show your blood had traces of an agent used to cause memory loss. That’s why you can’t remember.”

“Why would they do that?” he asked.

“Don’t know. But we’ll find out. We have to find the physician who treated us. Some of your files were destroyed. I’m looking into that, too.”

A corporal appeared carrying a freshly pressed set of cammies and Johnny slipped into them. They left the captain and he and Sonia headed up the hill on foot to the home they might share for a day or perhaps two.

They stopped at the falls before Johnny’s swimming pool watching the pulse of water cascading to the rocks before settling into the slow and gentle journey through the deep natural pond. Sonia gripped his hand.

“Maybe you should have stayed. Let the doctor check you. Maybe...”

“Sonia, please. I want to be with you.”

“Do you think they might be wrong?” she asked.

“That I only have a day or two? No, Sonia. I think that’s all we have. Maybe all we’ll ever have.”

Her lower lip trembled and she caught it between strong white teeth as she struggled with her erratic breathing. When she spoke, her voice was strained. “I wasted all those days.”

“We were searching for a vampire most of it.” He used his knuckles to lift her chin until their eyes met. “You didn’t know.”

“But they did. That’s why they were concerned when you couldn’t change. But they didn’t tell us. Why didn’t they tell us?”

Johnny gave her a sad smile. “I don’t know.”

“They’re hiding something else. I feel it.”

“Sonia, I’ve never met anyone like you. And if I only have two days I can’t think of anyone else I’d rather spend them with.”

She threw herself into his arms and he wrapped her up in a strong embrace. The sweetness of his body pressed to hers was punctuated by the knowledge that this would not last. She would not have him next week or next month. He’d be there, but beyond her reach.

“I should have been here. I just...I was afraid.” She met his gaze, no longer hiding, no longer running. “Now I’m terrified.”

He dipped his chin and she raised hers so that their mouths met with a sweet blending of texture and taste. But the need burned too hot in them both. Soon his kisses turned fierce. His tongue delved, mingling with hers in a dance of urgency. He caressed her throat, moving down to release each button of her shirt before casting the garment aside. She tugged his shirttails from his trousers and they separated for the time it took for him to pull his shirt over his head and for her to strip out of her bra. She fumbled with his zipper, the desperation making her clumsy. He dragged her to the soft grass and they tugged and pulled until their clothing lay strewn all about them.

Johnny gave her a wicked smile that heated her body more thoroughly than the humid jungle air. She stroked his cheek and then threaded her fingers in his hair and tugged. He kissed her lips and then moved steadily downward, each kiss bringing her a dart of pleasure. At last his arousing mouth covered her breasts. His tongue grazed across her nipple fanning the steady pulse of need into a blazing fire. The aching want beat low and deep inside her. She pressed against him and he laid her back upon the sweet, fragrant grass. The damp smell of earth mingled with the scent of this man. She breathed deep, hoping to remember each moment, each detail. How long did they have this time?

His knee pushed between her parting legs and she rose to rub against him, sending a shock of pleasure ripping through her body.

Her fingers delved into his hair. Frantic, she tried to touch him everywhere at once, exploring his back and arms, stroking her palms over his skin as she rubbed her cleft against his erection.

His fingers slipped into her hair, tangling in the long waves that fell about her and across the damp earth. His hips lowered to hers, pinning her to the ground. She felt his hard shaft against her trembling body, gliding against the moist folds of her genitalia but it was no longer enough. She needed to feel the thrust and grind of him inside her body.

He extended his arms, staring down as his dark hair fell about his face. Intent dark eyes stared and the moisture of her kisses still clung to his lips. She tried to memorize every line and plane of his face. This was how she wanted to remember him, young and naked and desperate for what she would give him.

How long until fate stole him once again? How long until his body finished destroying the protein that made him human and she lost him once more?